Alexander Pope said:
"To Err is human, to FORGIVE is divine"
Forgiveness is one of the most powerful tools that we have in this life, the problem is, it's not always easy to forgive, sometimes holding on the pain feels so much better, holding onto the hurt can make us feel like we are in control but I've come to learn that having an unforgiving heart/spirit can be toxic to ourselves and can hurt us if we are not careful.Ā
While I was growing up Forgiveness came easy to me, now, I've made mention in past blogs that I was raised in the church, my adopted dad was a deacon, it was constantly taught, if someone offend you or if they smite you on the cheek then our duty was to give them the other cheek as well, we were taught that God Is Forgiveness and so we aught to forgive because we are of God, and, honestly, for me that was no problem because I was a big hearted individual anyway (life back then was kind) I had no clue just how much of a reality check I had coming to me as I continued to grow up.
I made mention in a previous blog that my mom passed away in my late teenage years and that veil of protection, that part of life I had no idea about was sure to meet me, all those times in my life when she said "You don't know nothing" i would soon come to fully understand just what she meant and how right she was.
Time continued to go on. I stayed in the church world, continued to forgive, continued to trust God because He said that if I forgive then HE would take care of the rest.
I moved out ofĀ NYC to a new state at the age of 28, started working, became independent but Lord knows I didn't know how cruel the working world could be, I started dating (knowing nothing because I was never taught) about relationships and men and the such, the pain of relationships and being cheated on and disrespected caused me to shut myself off from people and trust no one, it became easy to REMEMBER what they did and hold grudges on my heart day in and out
Day in and day out I walked with unforgiveness in my heart, I dragged it around like an anchor, not realizing that this weight was holding me down, I tried to rationalize it in mind/in my heart... god, he did this to me and it really took a toll, God, she did that to me when all I did was do the right thing but here you are telling me that I have to forgive them when I've done no wrong to them? Question is. What's in it for me?. Why should I forgive them?????...
It took a long while but one day I got my answer, what's in it for me? PEACE!!!!!!
I read a quote that said:
āForgive others not because they deserve forgiveness. Forgive them just because you deserve peace.ā
I find thatĀ 2019Ā tested my ability to let go and forgive people for some things that I found to be UNFORGIVABLE, the question became, how do I forgive this? Or why should I forgive them when they continue to do the things they apologize for?. For MONTHS I held on to the pain, the anger, the hatred and refused to let go, It became easy to stay in a constant state of "Screw them" because it felt good (to be honest) and it kept a boundary line that kept me comfortable.
being able to let go and move on from past pains and past hurts, being able to be free, there is such a power behind it all.
The moment I was able to truly set my heart, my spirit, my mind and my lips to say I FORGIVE YOU,Ā was the moment I found peace, it was like a burden being put down, I was able to walk freely and breathe deeply and just move on.
So you're asking yourself, well, why should I forgive? After everything they put me through why in the world should I forgive?
Well, my answer is this, Forgiveness has the power to set your soul free!, when we forgive other's that's life has a way of working it out on our behalf for the greater good, believe me when I tell you. When they say Karma is ......... (well, you know) believe me when I tell you, that's a true saying. Life has a way of dealing with people that will amaze you but first you've got to be willing to forgive and free yourself and move on.
I believe that there is a truth about life, there are some things we will have to overcome in order to get to our next level, there are some things that WILL come to test us to see how strong we are. I believe that until we pass our tests we cant FULLY get to where we desire to be, that test is what's going to push us to our next place.
I just want to encourage and admonish you. Please don't let the things that people have done or past pain leave shackles on you, life has so much to offer and your journey is not yet complete so please, forgive and let peace, happiness and joy be at the center stage of your life, I speak from experience. Happiness is a beautiful place to be, I pray that you allow it, bask in it, live in it and let life take care of the rest.