angry harpy bitch

aformulatedphrase.com

[vladtheunfollower]

[bagh0st-deactivated20240223]

Hes trying his best. I love him.

[rocktheholygrail]

Brooklyn Nine-Nine || The Good Place

[shencomix]

[scareaphina]

This is adorable.

[bimbocracy]

every single negative stereotype about women was dreamt up by men who were projecting. fight me about it.

[bimbocracy]

“women can’t drive”

It is so well known that women are better and safer drivers than men that OUR CAR INSURANCE RATES ARE LOWER. Women get into fewer accidents, get fewer DUIs, and receive fewer speeding tickets than men.

“women never shut up”

Several scientific studies have shown that not only do men talk more than women, they also think that women have been talking for much longer than they actually have. Men interrupt and talk over women, dominate conversations, and still think women talk too much.

“women are shallow”

Lol next

“my wife is my ball and chain lmao”

Multiple studies have shown that marriage between men and women: Increases male lifespan, decreases female lifespan Decreases male depression rates, increases female depression rates Decreases male stress levels, increases female stress levels Increases male health and happiness, decreases female health and happiness Increases a man’s chance of getting a raise or promotion, decreases a woman’s chances of getting a raise or promotion

“women are too emotional”

Men love to say this about women after hurting them, in order to shift the blame and dismiss their feelings in one go. In reality, women are taught to hold our tongues and control ourselves quite literally from birth. We’re taught to put men’s needs and wants ahead of our own emotions regardless of the personal cost. Men are taught to do more or less whatever the fuck they want to women. Men take their emotions out on women while women are expected to shove theirs down.

I could go on and on but I don’t really think I need to.

[please-unfollow-this-blog]

“women can’t drive” (The Guardian) (CBS News) (Insurance Institute for Highway Safety)

“women talk to much” (PBS, resources included)

“women are shallow” (just read the book, Dataclysm. by okcupid founder (?) that includes data about sex, gender, race, in finding online romantic partners)

“ball and chain” (University of London)

for all you pissbabies crying about sources

[oniongentleman]

I’ve met guys who talk for so fucking long and just go on for fucking forever even when they are so incredibly wrong and like NO ONE is listening to them anymore but they’ll just keep talking. Like bro, that one kid over there has straight up fallen asleep and we’re all just listening for the sake of politeness and like half the people have just gone onto their own conversations but you’re STILL TALKING. WHY

[clarabeau]

Ladies, I am holding out my hand. Do you trust me?

I need you to open Google Maps. Locate your nearest mall. Get in your car. Drive to Yankee Candle.

Past the seasonal pumpkin display, near the back of the store, you will find a trash pile Man Candle section. You will see candles called MMM, Bacon!. Riding Mower. Man Town. (I’m not kidding. Man Town.) Stay strong. Not in this section, but likely very near this section, you will find a candle called Mountain Lodge.

Hold this jar in your hands like a talisman. Close your eyes and picture a man.

I want to be clear: I’m not talking about a Hugh Dancy. Or an Andrew Garfield, a Ben Whishaw, even a Tom Hiddleston. This exercise requires someone in the Chris Evans weight class. The Richard Armitage department. Someone with smile lines around his eyes who could chop the cedar for your bower with his own hands, strangle an alpha wolf, carry you home when you sprain your ankle in the woods, bench press your entire body. Picture this man in your mountain home with a full beard, a slightly grimy white henley, a fond half smile he reserves only for you. Now open the lid and smell Mountain Lodge.

Steady yourself on the man candle display. Give yourself a second. No, you’re not wrong. Yes, the Yankee Candle Company has just eliminated the need for men. This medium tumbler Mountain Lodge candle jar is now your boyfriend. The Yankee Candle Company has effectively replaced the need for contact with the male half of our species with a compact and clean-burning candle in a jar.

“Do you like this one?” the cashier asked, ringing me up. “Every man should be required by law to smell like what this candle smells like,” I replied intensely. “That’ll be $12.01,” she said.

MOUNTAIN LODGE

[stepone]

it literally smells like waking up on a cold night to find a bearded richard armitage adding another quilt to the bed before he gets back in and pulls you snugly against his chest

I’m not fucking around I feel like I should be watching chris hemsworth in flannel and suspenders whittling a delicate masterpiece in front of a fireplace rn

[blackberrycreek]

All right, Tumblr, I saw this post a few months ago and immediately realized I had to smell this candle.  I have never in my life experienced such a burning need (pun intended) to smell what the Yankee Candle website described as a warm aroma of cedarwood and sage, but what Tumblr described as my new boyfriend.

The trouble is that nearest Yankee Candle Company store was a bit of a trek, and my schedule tended to prohibit this olfactory adventure.

So for the last few weeks, as I’d scroll my Tumblr dash and look at images of attractive manly men, I’d sigh and wistfully think, if only I could engage another sense with this image. If only I could I could truly fathom the ideal fragrance of this man.

And then this happened.

And I knew.

I knew whatever was happening, I needed to get to a Yankee Candle Company. The scent of Mountain Lodge would transport me instantly to this scene. The aroma of this infamous candle could make me live out a self-insertion Avengers fanfic.

So I got in my car, made the drive, and located the Yankee Candle Company.  The store was crowded with holiday shoppers. My nose was immediately assaulted by hundreds of warring scents.  

I battled through the sea of humanity and the Angel Wings-Merry Marshmallow-Magical Frosted Forest assault, buoyed on by my need to understand what Steve Rogers ripping a log in half with his bare hands smelled like.

I waded toward the back of the store, only to discover the man candle section seems to have been discontinued. What was I going to steady myself on, once I found my scented gateway to hanging out with the Avengers on Hawkeye’s farm? I felt lost, adrift, unable to find my bearings amid Soft Blanket-Fluffy Towels-Home Sweet Home.

And then… rising from the “Fresh” display, there it was.

Mountain Lodge.

It was the moment of truth. What would it be like to smell this infamous candle?

I opened the lid. I took a deep breath.

And I giggled.

Ah yes.  This was it.  This gentle, pleasantly masculine fragrance, in fact, reduced me to what I’d probably do in the actual presence of Chris Evans: giggle like an idiot.

The smell makes me smile, makes me laugh, makes me gently swoon: all reactions that, indeed, can be elicited by an ideal man. I can barely handle the true power of Mountain Lodge.

Several months have passed since this discovery. I have regaled friends with the saga, and after hearing of it, they, too, felt the burning need to smell the candle.  One by one, we have all become Mountain Lodge converts. In times of need, this candle is our refuge. Our group has developed escapist superpowers, infused by the Yankee Candle Company. 

THE CANDLE, THE MYTH, THE LEGEND.  

MOUNTAIN LODGE.

[madame-vashtranerada]

This is how you do advertisement

[theyankeecandle]

we love everything about all of this. We will always be there for you, just light your Mountain Lodge candle and know that our love burns bright for you.

[clarabeau]

The official Yankee Candle™ tumblr account has recognized the Mountain Lodge mythos. My work on the material plane is finally complete. A being of pure light, I slowly ascend to the aether.

[rejectedprincesses]

Alakhai Beki (c.1191-([post 1230]): Princess Who Runs the State

Man, Mongolian fashion takes forever to draw. Full entry here. Patreon here. Books here. Art notes and whatnot after the cut.

Keep reading

[observationballoons-deactivated]

British women forestry workers, 1918.

[lyrium-deactivated20230102]

🌟planetary sign meanings

⭐️sun sign “i am” + personality, ego, conscious self, motivations, life purpose, interests + transitions once a month

⭐️moon sign “i feel” + emotions, intuition, unconscious self, hidden qualities + transitions every two to three days

⭐️mercury sign “i think” + communication, problem solving, intelligence, curiosity + transitions every three to four weeks

⭐️venus sign “i love” + romance, beauty, social skills, attractions, money + transitions every one to two months

⭐️mars sign “i act” + motivation, drive, confidence, energy, aggression, impulses + transitions every six to seven weeks

⭐️jupiter sign “i grow” + luck, personal growth, life philosophy, ethics + transitions once a year

⭐️saturn sign “i achieve” + ambitions, limitations, challenges, fears, maturity + transitions every two to three years

⭐️uranus sign “i evolve” + freedom, originality, change, rebellion, spontaneity  + transitions every seven years

⭐️neptune sign “i dream” + inspiration, illusion, imagination, creativity, spirituality + transitions every fourteen years

⭐️pluto sign “i empower” + power, transformation, rebirth, secrets + transitions every twenty years

[jadenvargen]

i like elephant seals IN THEORY cos they look so goofy but every time i watch any documentary about them all they do is fuck and fight extremely graphically and disgustingly to the death so i’m deeply afraid of them

[smugbots-and-such]

I just googled “why do elephant seals fight” and got a video of one bashing himself in slow, rhythmic, dead-eyed crashes against a truck only slightly larger than itself while said owner just stood to the side, a defeated, perplexed look on his face

[smugbots-and-such]

[scareaphina]

I made this reality affirmation at the urging of my therapist. I've had it as my phone background for a week now and seeing it multiple times a day has been so good for me. I often get lost in the idea that the things I am recovering from didn't happen or weren't as bad as they were. I get carried away with the notion that the things I'm doing or the ways I'm responding are unreasonable or have no logical basis. . I think it's easy for us to believe that the ways in which we operate or respond in the aftereffects of trauma are dysfunctional somehow, but the fact is that our brains are often responding to very real circumstances. And they're doing their best to protect us or heal us or make things easier. . In the style of Barbara Kreuger. Photograph from The Sleep of the Beloved by Paul Schneggenburger. . #realityaffirmation #therapy #barbarakrueger #paulschneggenburger #reminders #brains #healing #trauma

[wnq-writers]

“I’m in the mood for solitude, but for you, I’ll make room.”

— Bruce Adler (via wnq-writers)

[straightwhiteboystexting]

algedonics

At least he made me laugh

[scareaphina]

play to your strengths, boyo.

[scareaphina]

I got a new friend this morning! Not sure if they are a fox or a dog. Any thoughts, internet friends? #skulls #skullsofinstagram #foxskull #dogskull #witchesofinstagram🔮🌙 #altar #jinxedphilly (at Jinxed West Philly)

[unmutedlark-blog]

medically accurate muscle chart:

[mielparaoshun]

View this post on Instagram

[ttomateverde]

@blackpantherforbestfilm2018

[scareaphina]

Oh. My. Gods.

[scareaphina]

Salt always feeds me. Take that however you want. #nayyirahwaheed #poetry #poetsofinstagram

[deceptivelips]

[scareaphina]

This. This. This.