Untitled

hope not ever to see heaven. i have come to lead you to the other shore; into eternal darkness; into fire and into ice penned by britt

[scgacious]

deathwalking​:

         ❝ hey, you! ❞ a good a start as any to a conversation, right? ❝ you look strong enough. what do you say to helping me out with some landscaping? i’ve got beer and some extra cash, if that sweetens the deal. ❞ a pause. ❝ i figure there’s nothing else to do around here, and i’ve been itching for a nice pond. ❞

hearing a voice, carmen turns around and raises an eyebrow, a smile gracing her features. "you want to make a nice pond then? i can swing that. when?"

[isemanout]

[scgacious]

diabhales​:

   Instant panic rises in his throat, and regret sinks like a rock in his stomach. He’s usually anxious, and a consistent stutter even when joyful … it might make it seem like he’s less trusting of Carson than perhaps he should be. This isn’t to say he DOES trust her: loyalty is a mysterious thing, and transgressions Sawyer told of prevented real connection and kinship, even if just in the office of the local psychiatry.   “   I-I d-don’t think that!   ”   He said, eyes widened. He didn’t know if receptionists were bound by HIPAA.   “   I don’t th-think you’re … mean.   ”   

she tilts her head to the side, rapidly clicking her pen. "you're friends with sawyer. it's ok to think i'm a dick. it makes sense," a smile graces her features and she shakes her head. "but again, you're being here stays here. you don't have to trust me," she shrugs her shoulders."

[scgacious]

hellrisen​:

GIRLS WERE PETTY —— hitting below the belt, movement volant and subtle as the blow lands without warning. sawyer knows what carson’s doing yet she’s without of the ability to strike back. at least on the level that she wanted to.   “   yeah, thank you. and maybe next time, you could look where you’re going.   „   she musters, a smile shaping: cold, dark eyes keeping all the emotions it lacks.   “   we don’t want people to think you’re an inconsiderate bitch, right ?   „  

she really wants to deck sawyer, solely for the fact that she's here. she lets out a laugh and rolls her eyes, "wouldn't be the first time someone has though that about me, sayer. it certainly won't be the last either. but hey, thanks for that pro life tip, what would i do without you?" she says, a smile gracing her features. "any other lame attempts at an insult you want to throw my way? i'd love to hear them."

[scgacious]

hellrisen​:

stefan didn’t want to be there any more than she did. nor did he feel INCLINED, past the possible consequences to be placed on his conscience, to go the extra mile. yet … carson’s refusal to accept offers made was infuriating. the crease between brows deepen, all whilst he struggles to justify her stubborn disposition. how hard did she hit her head ?   “   —— i’m calling you a cab.   „   words spoken beneath his breath, and a hefty layer of annoyance, stefan fishes the phone out of his jeans.

she rolls her eyes. the back and forth is becoming annoying and she's OVER it. "i'll cal a cab. thanks though," she says, a small smile gracing her features. "you've been oh so kind," her tone oozes with sarcasm as she feels around for her phone before spotting her belongings in a chair and lets out a huff. "i'll call a cab, dude. thanks."

[scgacious]

hellrisen‌:

a NO would’ve sufficed. then she vocalises a plan of her own—a stupid, senseless plan—and stefan’s inclination to walk away dwindles.  “  it’s three in the morning. you can’t walk.  „  he begins.  “  it’s my bar. so, it’s my responsibility. you are.  „  spoken with an obvious distaste for the idea, he soldiers through. he had a sister: a bit younger but around the same age. and though he would’ve chastised her for accepting rides from strangers, stefan didn’t view himself as one of the pervs in a similar scenario.  “  now you can take a gamble and get screwed for cab fair. or i can drop you off on my way back.  „  beat, voice dropping an octave.  “  not going to let some twenty-something wander off alone after dark. not in this town.  „ 

"you mean i shouldn't," she corrects and chews her lower lip. she rises an eyebrow as she thinks for a moment, "i'm 22. i dont mind. i need the exercise anyway," she insists with a smile, shrugging her shoulders. "that's really nice of you and i get it, it happened in your bar but i'd rather you not. just because when people do something to help you out, you kinda become indebted to them or they hold shit over your head. it's a whole thing."

[scgacious]

diabhales‌:

   teddy smiles — strained, still jittery. the idea of everything that had happened with sawyer was stressful. he didn’t necessarily like carson. but teddy didn’t hate anyone; certainly not her. but the idea of someone he wasn’t close to ( read: his mother, sawyer, adriana, his therapist ) knowing he was making the weekly trek to the psychiatrist’s office … it made him more nervous than normal. which was, all things considered, already a high level.   “   okay,   ”   he manages a choked whisper without a stutter, before sitting down on the nearest seat — perched on the edge, like a bird about to take flight.   “   how…. how are y-you ?   ”   even if carson had neglected small talk, he couldn’t. 

she watches him take a seat, her smile never leaving her face, although it fades when she looks back down at the book on her desk. hearing his voice, she looks back up at him and shrugs her shoulders, “i’m doing ok theodore. how are you? you know you dont’t have to be anxious right? like i won’t tell anyone you’re coming here. i’m not that mean.” she personally doesn’t have an issue with teddy, she always thought that in their few conversations, that he was actually very kind.

[scgacious]

hellrisen‌:

the odd aspect of a hazed encounter wasn’t the HOT & COLD attitude displayed by carson. rather the two of them speaking at all. to say she couldn’t recall their last conversation would be a lie … in fact, sawyer would’ve preferred to not. and though there was much to discuss post the train-wreck it was, they never did. now not being as good a time as any.  “  yeah, i’m sure you do.  „  spoken with a scoff, she shifts in her stance : weight moved from one leg to other, arms folding across her chest.  “  i’m great. was. until you decided to try ‘n bulldoze me.  „ 

hearing sawyer’s voice, carson shrugs her shoulders, “I kinda needed to get through, you were kinda in the way. Sorry.” she says, shrugging her shoulders again, a small smile gracing her features. “i kinda need to get to the bathroom but try to stay out of people’s way next time, ok?” she said, her smile still gracing her features as she nodded her head.

[scgacious]

hellrisen‌:

house parties were PREFERRED : faces known and liquor shared, more intimate than the local watering hole. but university friends differed from high school friends, so she settles for crowds split. one, maybe two, alright three, drinks in her system, and sawyer’s separated from her group. sure, accompanying one another to the bathroom was a GOLDEN RULE of feminism, but she had the drunken, foolish habit of wandering off. a trait of hers which would come back to bite her. it already was.  “  … hey ! — what the hell is your problem ?  „  swinging around, sawyer—intoxicated—chooses fight over flight. uncharacteristic in the context of carson, as the latter had been her go-to for years now. call it liquid courage.

a smirk graces carson's features when she turns and sees sawyer, "someone's being fighty," she sings. "oh, sawyer. i miss you," she says then frowns. everything drunk carson says needs to be taken with a grain of salt. "how are you? great, i hope."

[scgacious]

hellrisen‌:

brows shot up, it takes stefan a moment before the question registers in context. right, that.  “ enquirer. „  skimming, but that’s irrelevant. even if his pride clung to the distinction.  “ another hot shot fucked the nanny. you know, the usual. „  now listing past offenders would be impossible — stefan far from versed in celebrity culture — though it was a trope often making headlines. thank you again by the way. the doctor’s words echo in his head — a concussion, albeit mild, confusion a possible side effect. he nods, stifling a need to correct. that’s your first thank you, not second.  “ yeah, no problem. „  pause.  “ look, doc’s gonna clear you, and hospital bills can be a bitch so … you need me to give you a ride home? „

"enquirer? isn't that like..trash? i mean all of those things are trash, but that especially." she nods her head, a small smile gracing her features, "see? that's exactly what i mean," she says, shaking her head. "i don't really pay attention to celebrities. they're all trainwrecks, aren't they?" she asks, raising an eyebrow. his offer catches her off guard and she shakes her head, "no, that's ok. i can walk. accepting help allows people to take advantage of you and i'd rather not give people that ability, but thanks."

[scgacious]

hellrisen‌:

not responsible nor the caregiving type, yet somehow — in some way — stefan chose this moment to grapple with accountability. most days, he can muffle rowdy crowds and quarrelsome drunks. tonight had been excluded from the narrative. one could argue he riled them up: annoyance overtaking logic, resulting in things broken and customers endangered. once all was settled ( see: culprits kicked out and glass swept ), there was still the blonde. alone, alternatively abandoned by friends, and with a head injury to match the night’s chaos. it wasn’t guilt felt as much as inconvenience. alright, there was some blame picked up… stefan’s skimming the pages of tacky tabloid when she awakes, leaving a state of boredom for one of discomfort. awkward.  “  you got a concussion.  „  he informs, only repeating what’s been told to him. nighttime hospital staff not the most chatty.  “  wanted to make sure you actually woke up.  „  clearing his throat, he approaches: arms folding, exhaustion weighing him down.  “  … need me to call anyone?  „

"oh. sounds terrible," she said, shrugging her shoulders. "what are you reading?" she squinted. she doesn't know stefan very well, so it's safe to say she's confused. "no. my dad's out of town." that's a lie but she's not good with people helping, or at least attempting to be helpful. "you look tired," she observes. "thanks again by the way."

[scgacious]

diabhales‌:

@scgacious​   /    now that teddy was dead, he figured it might be important to go back to therapy. it wasn’t the whole DEAD thing, not really, but how he’d died. suicide, as most people knew, was not really the best indicator of one’s solid mental health. but considering that it had been effective, and then decidedly not … things were confusing enough to necessitate another visit to former doctor. he arrives at the office forty-five minutes early to prepare himself in the environment … he’s been there a million times before, but not recently, and more IMPORTANTLY: not at this time, on this day of the week, which is why he’s so surprised to see a semi-familiar face behind the front desk. of all people — why did it have to be carson? he clears his throat, standing awkwardly in front of the desk, drawing the blonde’s attention. it wasn’t like she’d know teddy was dead, but she’d know he was in therapy, and that was somehow worse.   “   i, uh — i’m … i’m here fo-for dr. …   ”   word falls silent on lips that feel like cotton, and he smiles awkwardly at her with an apologetic exhale before he tries again.   “   dr. m … morse   ?   ”  he’s embarrassed, maybe, of how long it takes him to get a sentence out, but nerves were getting the better of him upon seeing a familiar face. it wasn’t like it was anything ANYONE who had spoken to teddy wasn’t used to. 

Hearing a familiar voice, Carson looks up from her computer. She tilts her head to the side and frowns hearing him stutter. The two were not friends; he’s friends with Sawyer and they went to school together but their interactions were purely civil. He’s nervous. She knows he’s nervous and with anyone else, she’d probably try and use that to her advantage but instead, she gives him a small smile. “Um..take a seat and I’ll let him know you’re here, ok?" she decides against the awkward small talk, not that the two had much to talk about anyway.

[scgacious]

diabhales‌:

   working at the attic was rarely stressful, in spite of all she technically had on her shoulders. she was in charge of it all, maybe, but most of the work was tedious rather than difficult … organizing, tagging, making change at the register. it was everything she made everyone else do, just more. and as much as she hated monotony, sienna had learned to find something at least SEMI-RELAXING in the idea of folding and sorting things. though what she genuinely disliked was deciding what to keep and what to pass along — things tattered enough for the trash or to be brought upstairs to her apartment to be used as a dishtowel, things ugly or out of season for them to donate to goodwill or the salvation army. they were a business, after all.   “   thank fucking god you’re here,   ”   she muttered, taking the coffee gratefully.   “   i need you to take whatever you consider fugly out of that pile and put them in the blue bins, okay? we’re having a sale on friday.   ”   a sale for a thrift store, they might as well have been charity anyway. sienna’s style was far toi eclectic to make the choice herself — mixing vintage and new, patterns and fabrics paired together in unlikely combination. almost all her shopping was done pro-bono courtesy of the attic. 

at the mention of the word fugly, carson let out a laugh. "yeah, you got it." she doesn't get tired of this place; it acts as a stress relief from dealing with other people. "you're having a sale?" carson asks, raising an eyebrow. "Might as well just give them away the, don't you think?" the blonde asks, raising an eyebrow. carson smiles, looking over at sienna “love the outfit, sienna.” she smiles, shrugging her shoulders. sienna’s style was one that carson is nowhere near brave enough to go about it on her own. 

[scgacious]

starter for: stefan cowell. / @hellrisen​

The Cockpit wasn't her usual spot, but something grabbed her attention today. After her shift, she headed towards the Cockpit and took a seat at the bar. However, it seemed to be everyone's spot and it's fairly crowded and crowds were not her jam. She's had a couple drinks when she hears yelling, which only progresses to get louder. She stands up to leave when within seconds, she's being shoved to the ground, head colliding with the floor and losing consciousness. when she awoke, she squinted at the fluorescent lights and looked around. seeing stefan, she jumped then frowned, “i--hello. what are you doing here? i don’t think i owe you for my drinks.”

[scgacious]

graveyardisms‌:

“ ━ I’m glad I’m still important to her. ” It comes out almost like he’s accusing her of not caring, but he bites his tongue, trying not to stammer out a re-worded version. Instead, he hopes she realizes he just means he’s glad Sol ( he calls her that because she’s a piece of the sun ) didn’t forget about him. “ Good, ” he replies, lips quirking in a small smile. They return to brief silence, and then she speaks again, and he feels like he got run over by a truck, or something like that. “ Car, hey, shh. It’s okay. You didn’t fuck anything up. ” A pause, and she says it ━ well, close enough. “ I love you too, ” he says softly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “ And I’ve missed you, too. God, I’ve missed you so much. ” Thumb unconsciously brushes her lip, and he sighs. “ Can━ Can I kiss you ? ” He asks, even though he’s afraid she’ll say no, because he’s more scared that she’ll run if he doesn’t.

“You’ll always be important to her. You’re Sven. Though now she can say Steven. I’ve been working with her on that.” She smiles, shrugging her shoulders. Although he tells her she didn’t fuck up, she can’t help but feel like she had. And there they are. The words she never thought she would hear from him again. His thumb along her lip causes a chill to run up and down her spine. His question catches her off guard but she smiles. “You don’t have to ask,” She says, shrugging her shoulders. “But it’s nice that you did,” She takes a deep breath and a smile graces her features. “You never have to ask.”

[scgacious]

starter for: sawyer kinney. / @hellrisen​

she's not sure when drinking became her thing, and yet here she sat. she needs a break from the guys and the booze and gets up to head towards anywhere away from the bar. she darts to the back, mainly in an attempt to go to the bathroom first. she stops in her tracks at the sight before her though; sawyer kinney. she lets out a chuckle, "great. sawyer. don't mind me, i just need to push through.." she says, doing just that and pushing past sawyer to go to the bathroom. she's not the kindest when she's drunk, but she'd make apologies for that later. maybe.

[scgacious]

graveyardisms‌:

“ I … Dunno. A year’s a long time for a kid. ” And for him, but he doesn’t say it. “ Hey, if no one else will watch it with her, I sure will. She’ll always be my Boo. ” Words leave his mouth quickly, but he doesn’t cover for them, instead falling silent. They’re walking towards her place, two falling naturally into step beside one another, but they pause again as she speaks. She takes his hand, and the movement surprises him enough that he almost draws back, but the warmth of her hand reminds him that this isn’t a threat. “ Oh, Car. ” Words are barely a whisper, and he places a hand to her cheek, thumb rubbing it gently. “ Car, I don’t care if you think I deserve better. All I’ve ever wanted was you. ” He wants so badly to kiss her, but he doesn’t ━ even though she’s saying she still cares about him romantically, he’s not sure if he should. 

“That’s true. You make a fair point but there’s no way you’d mean any less to her.” She smiles, shrugging her shoulders. “You’re important to her.” She smiles at his words and nods her head, “She’ll love to hear that,” She says, shaking her head. The walk to her place is fairly silent and she doesn’t like it. Hearing her nickname from him gives her a sense of familiarity; something she’s craved. “And all I’ve ever wanted is you. That’s never going to change. I’m just not used to things going good and I fucked it up and I’m so sorry. It never meant I didn’t love you. Because I did, I do.” She reaches up, putting a hand over his. “I’ve missed you.”