Emily and Dreams by the cranberries
Insp: I know I’ve felt like this before, but now I’m feeling it even more because it came from you
Note: I know that this is completely ignoring the romantic context of the song but this line just hit really hard for Emily’s desperation for Luke’s approval!
Having a brother was… different. Undoubtedly a good different, but still. Different.
Playing music, for example, was completely different. She had always loved the feeling of connecting with an audience, of knowing that her music was speaking to them. It was magical, really, in a way that ballet had never quite managed to be. It made her feel alive, like she mattered, like she was doing something important. Luke had been the same way, Uncle Bobby had told her. He always wanted to help people, to change their lives, in the only way he knew how. He was always about the music not the money, that’s what Uncle Bobby had told her.
And Emily got it, she really did. There was nothing like the rush of performing, the adrenaline, the applause. A fair few therapists had suggested that it was because her parents never listened to her play, but Emily craved the applause more than anything. It wasn’t a vanity thing, she didn’t think, but she needed it. Knowing that people were hearing her, seeing her, that she had left a mark on the world, it was everything to her.
But when Luke listened, it was different. She never felt like she was chasing that rush; never felt that choking desperation for approval. It was just warm, contentment settling in her stomach like a particularly good cup of hot chocolate. His praise, his approval, it was different. She didn’t need everyone in the world to love her, not when Luke was sitting across from her, smiling at her like she was the only thing that mattered.
He was her brother, he was the reason she had gotten into music in the first place. It was his demo, his guitar, his songs, that had sparked the passion that carried her through every high and low in her life. All she had ever wanted was to know if he would be proud, if he would think that she was good enough, and after fifteen years, she finally had it. After fifteen years alone, wondering if he would have loved her if he were alive, there he was. Sitting across from her, listening to her playing his songs, she knew without a doubt that the answer to all of those questions was yes.
And that was enough to repair the hole in her chest that she’d spent her life trying to fill with strangers’ applause.
Send me a song or lyric and an OC/ship, and I’ll write a drabble inspired by it
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