hello

I basically just live post while I binge netflix now

[seaweedthegenie]

Its like Criminal Minds heard me talking shit last week. I was not ready for that opening scene.

[seaweedthegenie]

I hate that everyone is using ai flyers and ads now. Everywhere i look its that weird poster with the kinda bubbly design. Like I don't even know how to describe it i just know it makes me deeply uncomfortable every time. Marketing materials in the stores of a billion dollar company should not look the same as a flyer for a family reunion i saw on a suggested Facebook post by someone I don't know.

[seaweedthegenie]

So its really bothering me that I keep profiling the unsub faster than the bau. I still like the show but its definitely a little weird this season. Like I get that it seems to be more about the interpersonal relationships than the actual cases but its taking me out of it to figure it out faster than these people who are supposed to be the best. Idk, is it the thing where they're making shows for people on their phones? Because just this episode they've said out loud the same thing twice that was already made clear with context.

[stonerparty]

[seaweedthegenie]

Growing up fat is crazy because to this day I get self conscious just eating a slice of cookie cake in the mall good court

[dogpuppy]

[seaweedthegenie]

So wait, is The Sicarius Files always a live show?

[rollingkush]

Me right now

[dogpuppy]

[seaweedthegenie]

I love watching old true crime shows from before the show "Bones" came out because they always explain what a forensic anthropologist is. Anytime they say they're bringing one in I know they're fixing to get a positive id one way or the other.

[seaweedthegenie]

So I keep trying to figure out what is wrong with me and I just keep coming back to needing treatment for my mental illness and that sucks. Like there's just something in me that keeps telling me its something I can fix on my own and this all my own fault and if I could just try harder it would all be better.

[seaweedthegenie]

I love NCIS Origins because they actually let the characters who don't come back in NCIS have good lives and be happy. But then if you think about it too hard it makes it seem like Gibbs might be cursed and he brings pain to everyone who gets close to him.

[seaweedthegenie]

I fucking love a good lunch spot. Like I've got all the hits here: a sandwich, pasta salad, a side of fruit, peach sweet tea, and a slice of red velvet cake!

[seaweedthegenie]

I always used to say I wasn't a reader in school. But I forget that that's because I read fanfiction and I absolutely did not want anyone other than my best friend to know that. But I was reading for hours every night. And I was reading the good shit, written by what had to be some of the greatest writers alive. Now I did eventually fall off of it because I was having a really hard time finding things I liked. Its like I read all the good ones and there were none left. I continued searching for years and at some point just quit. Continued writing my own for a few more years until depression just made it impossible. But I still look back fondly on those nights where I stayed up til 3am reading fics on fanfiction.net and watching fan videos on youtube. (To this day I see an entire Snape/Hermione video in my head whenever Diary of Jane comes on)

[seaweedthegenie]

Its always funny to me when I see post about staying home sick in the 90s and it actually involves like soup and ginger ale and stuff you do when you have like a cold or a stomach bug. And the reason this is so funny to me is because I never stayed home because I was physically sick. I would say I was but really I was just too worried or scared about something and I couldn't handle going that day. And its been the same in my adult life. I've never called out of work because I was actually physically sick. I've only ever missed work because of my mental health. Wow now that I've typed that all out I figure I really do need to get back into treatment. I had a super mom who did it all and I still have it in my head that I'm supposed to be able to do that too. But I know in my heart that the only way I'll ever be person I want to be and live the life I want to live is by being medicated and in therapy. I just wish I could erase all this stigma and back and forth inside my head.

[stonerparty]

[seaweedthegenie]

Life is such stupid bullshit. I just got bit by a god damn dog. And its one of those situations where its hard to be mad at anyone because he's a dog off the street someone was really trying to help and this dog has let me know in the past he doesn't want me going into the house but because of other shit going on at the time I just walked right onto the porch without thinking. Actually its not hard to be mad at anyone. If people hadn't been screaming and fighting each other out in yard for literally no reason I would have thought better than to try going in the front door with the dog right there. And I'm mad at myself because I should have known better. I know how dangerous dogs can be, especially rescues off the street you know nothing about. And I know that just because that dog sat next to me on the couch last night didn't mean he wouldn't bite me today. But overall I'm just glad he let go and I got inside before he came back for more. Now I'm going to smoke weed til I pass out because I'm so done with today and my fucking arm hurts.