I woke up at 7 am on Tuesday and took amazing nudes and have had no one to send them to yet, like ok!
wallacepolsom

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Discoholic đŞŠ
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
cherry valley forever
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Jules of Nature
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

oozey mess

⣠Chile in a Photography âŁ
RMH

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Kaledo Art
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Peter Solarz
Claire Keane

@theartofmadeline
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
NASA

PR's Tumblrdome

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@semisectionalsofa
I woke up at 7 am on Tuesday and took amazing nudes and have had no one to send them to yet, like ok!
The Real Housewives of Berlin
Bettina, 48, Industrialist
âMy company is perfecting the worldâs first robot husband, until then Iâm just trying to have the most efficient level of fun possible.âÂ
Caren, 44, Discouraged Artist and Politicians Wife
"Money doesnât make me happy, because ultimately all emotions are an illusion."Â
Mareike, 36, Post-StructuralistÂ
"I may be a Marxist, but I refuse to share the spotlight âŚits actually a personality flaw of which Iâm deeply ashamed."Â
Claudette, 36, DJ and record label owner
"I like my drama like I like my techno: minimal.â
Binta, 47, Philanthropist
âMen may come and go, but the existential pain of living is here to stay.â
Waltraut, 51, Performative Screamer
âAt the end of the day we all must meditate on the evils we allow to exist in the world âŚI just prefer to do it with a glass of wine."Â
This is the only Tumblr post I ever made that I still think about.
There are parts of me that I think have genuinely been 'fixed' or healed in the past few years, and I think, semi-ironically, awww I kind of missed being a bit fucked up. But then I think maybe this wasn't so much an issue of 'fixing' or even 'healing' as it is maturity, and what I miss is being young.
(also im still plenty fucked up).
Had started out the year very âletâs go to the gymâ and then got a little bored oh well
It's so funny this Tumblr was at times a projection of my various insecurities, and then I posted speedo pics on here like a year ago and forgot about Tumblr like "Mission Accomplished!"
Had started out the year very âletâs go to the gymâ and then got a little bored oh well
Itâs hard to think back on this year without including all of post-vaccine 2021 as well, for some reason. I think thatâs fine. It feels right to count that all as a chapter together that should soon make room for the next one. Years are weird ways to measure human life anyway. Maybe the chapterâs already closed and Iâm not fully aware, maybe it will officially close in, say, May 2023. Whoâs to say, but in that time I:Â
- Lost a good chunk of my professional imposter syndrome.Â
- Had a stab at a whole little relationship, which, the further I get away from it the more ânothingâ it really felt (nice guy thought I guess), but was probably needed in both a life development and figuring out what I really want way.Â
- Checked some longer simmering sexual fantasies off my list (just some group stuff nothing toooo wild!), and then got bored of sex a little bit? Not completely, but you know.Â
- Found a little more body acceptance, and I donât necessarily mean in the âI feel good at the beachâ way. I guess itâs also inclusive of the âI donât feel good at the beach, but also what the fuck ever?â way, but also deeper.Â
So I guess the question is whatâs next? And I feel like that itâs probably heading in the direction of more boring maturity and stability and âgiving backâ kind of stuff, but Iâm ready.Â
This website both exposed me to valuable, challenging ideas (for which I am glad) while also somehow damaging discourse in a way that has had frankly amazing and unpredictable worldwide ramifications (mixed emotions about that).Â
Ok, whoâs coming back over here full time?Â
Remember when you couldnât scroll for a minute on this website without seeing a post that was like âCut toxic people out of you life!â What was that? What was going on with all of us? Are we all okay now? Have we done some work on ourselves first? Have we evolved?Â
Letâs be honest, we all know it works better with this Matthew Macfadyen characterÂ
Is Tumblr porn back or whatâs going on? Thatâs probably not good for me. This is the only place I feel comfortable getting to be totally unhinged on the web anymore.Â
One of my followers continuing to use this website to curate photos an memes:Â đ
Me rushing in every six weeks to use this site as some sort of semi-sacred confessional to post something I donât think any other social network can handle: âđ¨ đđŹđşđ¸đ đ
They should let us post nudes on here again. No oneâs watching.Â
Thinking about how getting vaccinated against one viral outbreak lead me to one of my sluttiest periods ever last summer.Â
And now another viral outbreak has rendered me to nun status just one year later.Â
I have now read every single one of Ian Flemingâs James Bond novels, except for Live and Let Die, which I had to stop once I hit the chapter title which includes the N-word. Hereâs a list of things you will encounter in these books:
James Bond throws up due to trauma at least once per book
Racism
No, really, more racism than youâre expecting
Yes, even for the 50s
At one point Bond writes a letter in his own pee
âAll the real hep-cats smoke reefers!â
Many comments on the nature of American culture, including the âexotic pungencyâ of American road signs
Extended passages of James Bond being racist against various ethnicities you didnât even know one COULD be racist towards
No seriously, James Bond inexplicably despises Bulgarians
A lengthy passage in which Bond shares his opinion that homosexuality is caused by giving women the right to vote
Bond gets tortured for the first time and immediately comes over all political and philosophical like, âMaybe communism is good actually, and also the Devil is a good guy?â
At one point Bond gets brainwashed by the KGB into trying to kill M
Bond is a grade-A Karen who delivers all of his restaurant orders with lengthy specifics as to how the food should be prepared, and gets pissy if itâs not up to his specifications.
âa gay, happy little crocodileâÂ
Bond is very excited to learn that in New York there are places where you can watch porn with sound AND color.
James Bond is The Most Boring Man in the World. His hobbies include golf and complaining about food.
Late in the books, Bondâs fiancee is killed right in front of him, and he starts showing PTSD symptoms and, instead of being all macho-man âI donât need no help,â immediately starts going to every doctor available trying to get treatment
At one point the government tries to offer him a knighthood or some such and Bond messages back that he refuses the knighthood and that âMy principal reason is that I donât want to pay more at hotels and restaurants.â When told that this is too rude, he amends it to, âI am a Scottish peasant and I will always feel at home being a Scottish peasant.â
At one point the Bond girl is tied down by the villain of the book to await being eaten alive by crabs. Bond is terrified for her, but she, being something of an amateur zoologist, knows perfectly well that crabs arenât gonna eat a living human, so she just chills there on the beach and waits for them to go away.
There is literally a damsel in distress tied to the actual train tracks, presented without irony
An MI6 agent speculates, in an official report to headquarters, that the target may be homosexual because he canât whistle. Apparently men who canât whistle are gay.
Bond is drafted to act as the villainâs secretary not once, but two separate times in two separate books.Â
When Bond is at a boring party at a hotel conference room and is ordered by his employer to liven up the party, he accomplishes this by ORDERING THE HOTEL BAND, who were previously singing a censored version of some song, TO PERFORM A STRIP SHOW FOR HIM AND THE GUESTS WHILE SINGING THE DIRTY VERSION. This is his second idea, after he previously livened up the party by using one of the girls in the hotel band - the same one he wants to strip for him - as target practice by balancing a false pineapple on her head and shooting it.Â
Bond exchanges a look with a fellow secret agent that is said to be âthe recognition that exists between crooks, between homosexuals, between secret agents.â
âA hand-painted sign said âSNAXâ and, underneath, âHot Cock Soup Fresh Dailyâ.â
The backstory of the villain of The Man with the Golden Gun is as follows: there was once a circus elephant who got REALLY HORNY and then went on a rampage and was shot by the cops, and then came back to the circus to pathetically and tragically attempt to perform its circus act one last time. The child who was supposed to ride the elephant in the circus act witnessed all of this, and when the cops shot the elephant dead while performing its tragic act, the boy grabbed a pistol and SHOT ONE OF THE COPS in revenge for HIS ELEPHANT DYING. And that boy grew up to be a deadly, womanizing, hired gun, with three nipples, whom MI6 speculates must be gay because he canât whistle. And thatâs the villain of the book.
These books will make you hate the British as much as every single villain seems to
Waaaayyy more casual drug use than you would expect
like, seriously, at one point Bond is AT DINNER WITH HIS BOSS in his bossâs fancy-ass club, and he orders an envelope full of benzedrine from HQ and just casually pours it into his glass to drink with his champagne.
M lives with the man who used to be Mâs Chief Petty Officer on his last naval posting, and who had followed M into retirement, and I am pretty sure they are boyfriends.
When Bond sleeps with the Bond Girl of Dr. No, she orders him to âTake those off and come inâ and âYou owe me slave-time. Do as youâre told,â proving once and for all that James Bond is a switch, I rest my case your honor
OP I want you to know that since I read this post yesterday I have been randomly thinking âtragic backstory: there was once a circus elephant who got REALLY HORNYâ and bursting into convulsive laughter several times every waking hour.
I regret to inform you that, yes, âgay men canât whistleâ WAS a real thing people really believed starting in the late 19th century
Whistling was highly gendered in mainstream western culture back then, and sexual attraction highly linked to gender expression in the Straight Mind. The logic ran that, since whistling was a Man Thing, gay men (inherently feminine) couldnât whistle and lesbians (inherently masculine) could
There were definitely people who knew this was total BS but still. It remained a widespread Thing for decades
Why does James Bond sound way more like a tragically flawed Adult Swim protagonist than I was lead to believe? Like, heâs not ever Archer, heâs like a Squidbilly in a tuxedo. Â
Monkeypox messaging has really been muddled by members of the queer community who may know their âtheoryâ and the history, but are not MSM and thus do not know either the 1) absolute specifics of our sex lives 2) the specific fear weâre feeling and information we desperately wish we had in plane language.Â
Why donât you guys be chill, take a back seat on this, stop centering yourself, and let the slice of the community who has far and away been the most immediately impacted take the helm on this? Thank you and please donât argue with me, a gay slut who live in New York City. I donât want to see anymore misleading and potentially dangerous tweets from anime icons, despite how well meaning youâre absolutely sure youâre being right now.Â