The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

[theinturnetexplorer]

Pokemon Mashups

[osakasa]

This is how I hold a pen in case you were wondering

[nonochton]

git gud

[baconpal]

Step aside, boys

[pomki]

>using hands.

plebs.

[taiikodon]

[marcosclopezblog]

[marcosclopezblog]

[angrymintleaf]

It got better

[thatsthat24]

Life as a Videogame: When You’re On a Roll 🎮 (W/ @welcome-to-the-joangle)

[howlingnia]

I love this

[ihavepsychicpowers]

I love Kerry Washington

[twaxerx]

Reblogging for the yoshi lick

[runningeleven]

Science side of Tumblr: how can dragons breathe fire?

[thatweirdscienceguy]

There are three variants of dragons. One of them possesses  a gland that produces a liquid, which spontaneously combusts when coming into contact with oxygen. Some phosphorus compounds could do that for example. The second one possesses two glands instead, which produce so-called hypergolic propellants, fluids that ignite when they come into contact with one another. The third kind stores the methane bacteria in their stomach produce, and expells it when breathing fire. In their mouth there’s a piezoelectric crystal, which is a substance that produces a spark when placed under mechanical stress and could thus serve to ignite the methane gas. Or it’s magic.

[memelovingbot]

the inherent queerness of mitochondria

[chaoticnewt]

the mitochondria is the power bottom of the cell

[4gifs]

[hatewitch]

THAT’S A FUCKING STRAIGHT JACKET FOR BABIES WHAT THE FUCK DON’T ADD A LITTLE SMILEY FACE WITH SOME HEARTS AND PUT THE WORD SNUGGLE IN THERE THAT’S HORRIFYING 

[randommakings]

You guys have clearly never dealt with babies, it’s called swaddling you dumbasses and it helps calm a baby down and it makes it easier for a mother to hold onto/nurse a very fussy baby.

[archived-twigwise]

also it makes babies less likely to like poke themselves in their eyes or scratch their faces up with their demon infant nails

seriously, baby nails are incredibly sharp and a baby does not need to claw themselves up 

swaddling is an ancient as fuck technique to keep your baby warm, safe, and calm (it simulates being held which helps make babies chill) and this particular invention means swaddling without all the fabric which will help keep babies cooler in warm climates, and also allow for changing diapers and the like without unswaddling them

sit yo asses down and learn to care for a small hairless human

[chipsncookies]

this site hates babies what do you expect

[rubyfruitjumble-deactivated2016]

*sees a crib* THATS A FUCKING CAGE FOR BABIES WHAT THE FUCK

[yungasura-deactivated20150415]

lmfao^^

[skysuggestion]

repeat after me: it’s okay to not have everything figured out

[cincinnatibeef]

me: sees velociraptors

me: these dogs are sharp but they are still good

[twitterlols]

[tryclops]

whoever made this meme is A FAKE FAN

fairy godmother was singing her iconic cover of “i need a hero” during this scene, “livin’ la vida loca” wasn’t performed by puss in boots and donkey until the end of the movie

literally check yourself before you wreck yourself

[intothespiderbottom]

shrek yourself before you wreck yourself

[rabidchild]

A. The song title you are looking for is “Holding Out for a Hero” which is a song by Bonnie Tyler, but performed in this film by the incomparable Jennifer Saunders (of AbFab fame).

B. Mongo had a featured line during “Livin’ la Vida Loca”, which he sang from his final resting place in the moat, meaning that it is completely fair to assume that someone would associate the song with his dying moments.

So who is the real fake Shrek fan?

[knot-the-father]

things heating up in the Shrek fandom.

[katie-altman]

@gaysupersoldiers

[redditfront]

[kuxco-deactivated20140828]

when someone asks you how you know all the zodiac signs in order

[coldafternoon-deactivated202102]

a normal interaction but everytime i overthink it my heart beats faster

[hurdygurdywizard]

Me: Doctor, why is that syringe filled with glitter? Doctor: Anaesthetic.

[luckticket]

[nonbinaryrainbow]

Please be nice to cashiers. It’s not their fault that the price is wrong, it’s not their fault that the item isn’t scanning, it’s not their fault that the store charges 5 cents for bags, it’s not their fault they have to ask you a few questions during your transaction, it’s not their fault that the line was long, it’s not their fault that your item was sold out, it’s not their fault that the bag ripped, it’s not their fault that when trying to bag your things nicely allowing the handles to still have function that the bag wasn’t exploding full, it’s not their fault the store is busy, it’s not their fault. Please be nice to cashiers.

[badscienceshenanigans-deactivat]

What I will never forget about the march in DC.  Walking to the march, the streets were packed. Every once in a while you’d hear loud, distant-sounding cheering. I couldn’t figure out where it was coming from until we walked over a subway grate.  It was coming from underground. There were so many women coming in on the trains that you could hear us through the street. 

[micdotcom]

Not all women got the right to vote in 1920 (x)

[laughterkey]

If your feminism isn’t intersectional, it ain’t shit.

[thegreatestcalamity]

[danasn0wc4t]

Especially since my parents sure as hell haven’t respected the presidents they’ve disagreed with.