i don’t know if anyone is still active + following me, but i’ll be archiving this blog and starting over! i’ll update when i transfer over, but ... hello again! (find me over at sensehurt)
hi everyone !! SURPRISED ?? i’ve been working on all of this covertly during a stressful / hiatus-like period because getting to this is IMPORTANT TO ME . i know , i know , i should’ve been working on drafts but i’ve been excited to GET TO THIS MILESTONE for a while , & share all my happiness with you guys !! before i start gushing though , i’ll give a short TLDR : in spirit of my anniversary i have done my best to update all pages , tags , & my theme ( thanks to @eternalworks again, ley is the best guys !! ) go ahead & take a look when you have the chance !! SECONDLY , as a thank you for everyone’s continued support , comment on this post fnff hfa message me & i’ll design an aesthetic / moodboard thing for either our characters’ relationship / your character only ( mutuals only ) but LET ME KNOW !! thirdly , i want to reiterate how i love EVERYONE i’ve gotten to know here . making this blog has seriously been a blessing in my life . fourthly ? , i want to SHOUTOUT to these people who i think deserve the world : @ahvir / @hiraecies / @sparedthem , @theharellan , @bornpariah / @voidheal , @righteousmade , @porticosdaughter , @lastbled , @asteeledheart & oh god , so many many many more , like @vigilflight , @makercursed , @hamletsboy , @itaidoshin , @extravagantliar. but you know how it is . LASTLY , read below if you want to see a pic of me crying . just kidding , but that’s my current mood as i write this . THEY’RE HAPPY TEARS , PROMISE !!
a year ago in may, i was replaying dragon age inquisition and felt a surge of inspiration for all these beloved characters that for years i had left untouched. fundamentally, i am an OC writer. i started out making OCs, and continue to make them outside of this platform. writing anything canon was and is always a huge stressor for me: could i capture them in the way they deserve, in a way everyone will recognize? i get consumed by doing the character justice, and with a nuanced character like cole, i was biting my nails. i did research for many, and i mean many days, watching videos and reading all his dialouge so that i’d be able to capture him even a little.
then i began my debut with baited breath. i did the usual routine of finding people active in the fandom, and reaching my hand out here and there with liking a starter call, or sending an ask meme. i’m not sure when, but i know soon, asks started flooding in, tags started to be placed on my threads in encouragement. people were telling me that they could hear cole in my writing. they recognized the effort i was putting in. they were supportive. they were kind. and it made me unbelievably happy.
there is nothing like logging into this account, even now. cole is such a treat to write. he is so kind, and self-sacrificing, and helpful, but most of all he makes me happy. and it makes me even happier to share the happiness he gives me to other people when i thread with them. it makes me smile when we both scream about our interactions, even when i come back, months later, and you guys are still waiting for me. i know i’m not the fastest, nor am i reliable. my life outside of here is incredibly taxing to me, and when i finally think i catch a break it starts to slip away from me again, and it’s been like that for a while.
but that’s why i so appreciate my solace here. i appreciate everyone’s messages, their tags, seeing you guys on the dash, the strange, sudden interactions that makes us friends in seconds. again, i appreciate every moment i’m here. like i said, it makes me happy, in ways so little does anymore.
and i hope, some days, i’m able to return the happiness all of you give to me, even if its just a small fraction. i hope im also able to give you guys some solace.
sup guys, know i disappear a lot. the next two weeks are going to be stressful, but afterwards i’ll be making my way back. thanks for being patient, this semester has been a real burden.
Assassination attempts are rarer, now, than they had been within the Circle. The world knew well that few would care if the GRAND ENCHANTER was left dead; an elven mage? One of the Circle? Half of Thedas would mutter GOOD RIDDANCE and the other half would never even know. But now? An ally of the Inquisition, let alone of an Inquisition lead by another like her — ELVHEN MAGE, QUICK TO REVENGE AND REBELLION — is afforded more protection than she had been before.
But fewer attempts does not mean none. It’s foolish; she’d gotten over - comfortable. Now there’s blood all over the library. Most of it is hers, but only because she is clean and quick and the would be assassin was not.
She is alive and the healers say she will remain that way, but her body aches and chills wrack her. Poison on the blade; she won’t die, but it leaves her blood rebelling. The healers have left her alone in the infirmary to rest and she finds her fingers curling into angry fists. Annoyed more than hurting, but only because she refuses to let herself ache.
The mage isn’t certain when he’d appeared beside her, a cool, damp cloth to press to her head and another to wrap gently around the back of her neck. Yet she blinks and there he is. Her expression gentles.
“Thank you,” she says. His strange eyes do not leave hers. She has been told of what he is and of what he’s done, and she wonders how she sounds to him. “And…I am sorry, too.” There his brows raise, pale eyes widening. She shakes her head. “The Inquisitor. She’s told me of what…what the Templars did to the young mage you tried to help. I was Grand Enchanter. It was my responsibility to…protect him. All of them.” The guilt of it eats at her ——
“Want to be better than they believed you could be,” he says. “Better than knife - ear or spellbind or pet. You couldn’t save everyone.” A pause, pregnant. “It doesn’t make the things he said true. It doesn’t make the things any of them said true.”
For a long moment, she is silent. Then, again, she says, “thank you.”
Imagine me with my great white waxen feathered wings circling &&. spiraling !! Higher &&. higher to a crisis. OH, I MELTED !! Then I fell. I do wish they’d asked me how I’d have liked to be remembered though: not the merely foolish bull-headed kid who refused to obey, but the dreamer with wild eyes, the one who once flew too close to the sun &&. briefly —— ALL TOO BRIEFLY —— blazed.
( IND. HERO OF KVATCH. AS WRITTEN BY ABEL. )
poem cred. / art cred.
areudirty
germansingergirl
2087
origamiaround
