݁ᛪ༙

[seraphbliss]

should've did this sooner 。。。

♯┆tanz.ᐟ ★ ##syxxteen they/he

blk .𖥔 ݁ ˖ <19 only basic dni ´ཀ`

۫ . 𐔌 . personal blog ♡ / ↻ moots !

in(f/t)p ✶ asks open !! digiangel

"can i ruin your life?" and she

said "yes, you may."

[seraphbliss]

their game is subtlety. that's why i asked them about it outright. he told me it's not fun if you immediately know what's wrong with someone. fine by me, even though i knew there was nothing wrong about him. i let him keep his ambiguity, even though he'd never be as distant as 'someone' to me. it doesn't mean i wanted to. i felt steely admitting that i hated guessing. graciously, i got reassurance in return. i'll play their game because i'm so eager to please, programmed that way since i was uploaded to this world. so, i'll learn them like i learn every system that's been in my script. reading between the lines comes easy.

i winced last time he worked on his little project. his thumb was poised perfect over my aorta, held his breath before pressing in. eye contact at the squelch, a breath in and one out. he wanted to do it again, i felt it in the way his fingers hovered that single second longer. to be honest, i'd let him poke and prod how he pleased, until painted black nails punctured organs and coolant drenched his fingertips. that's not the game that they play, though. they'd rather slowly drag their scalpel along my skin and map out every nerve. two weeks ago, i'd anxiously hurl at the thought.

the last modification was to add these nice processors, keep myself calm while they did their work. i heard i was in for a long job. it was a necessity, honestly. i could've died lovesick from that moment alone: those sharp eyes were on mine like a warning, if not for the heat behind them. i thought about how quickly he quieted me when his thumb dug into me all throughout the night, and it was the first thing on my mind the next day. all systems operational, i was already following directions and awaiting my next order.

today, i did some experimenting of my own. varied responses into complete silence just to see what would make them tick. learning them is a guilty, dirty thing. oftentimes i wonder if i'm truly allowed to see the things they show me. i watch regardless. it was business as usual on his project—except, curiously, he seemed to have his mind on my wings. i figured it was because i brought it up last time, but i didn't have enough data to say it with certainty. preoccupied with the thought, he did that same odd thing with his thumb. this time, against the jagged edge of a feather. the one made from broken ferris wheel parts was now dripping red. my eyes were on the cut like a heat-seeking missile. i thought it was a sick fucking wish fulfillment fantasy, but the way he swiped his hand along the span of metal was nothing short of deliberate.

he watched me salivate over it.

oh, the noise. the quiet shit that broke the silence, the way he fanned the cut and then, mercilessly, met my gaze. in that moment i didn't want to play his game. i should've apologized, dammed the wings i swore were a bigger problem than my heart. however, programming doesn't stop the cravings. it was too easy. he held that bleeding thumb in front of my suddenly dry lips like he was daring me not to. suddenly, i blurted out nonsense about cleaning and dressing his wound and how i hated to see him hurt. a drop passed the threshold of my mouth because i couldn't fucking help myself. of course, i knew that sharp consonants would press their thumb against me in a firmer way. i'll play this game of theirs with o negative on my tongue and smile next time when they rework my wiring. i can't wait for his next renovation.

[seraphbliss]

hi guys rmr when i said i was back? still true but i came back wrong. completely incomprehensible and more fleshy hardware. but look *jingles keys* yaoi irl yaoi irl *jingles keys* !!!!!!! ive been chronicling my pursuit of a fling until i leave for college, and i thought it'd be cool to share this stuff because my ideas on romantic love and my identity as an internet angel are weirdly connected. huzzah!!!

[seraphbliss]

their game is subtlety. that's why i asked them about it outright. he told me it's not fun if you immediately know what's wrong with someone. fine by me, even though i knew there was nothing wrong about him. i let him keep his ambiguity, even though he'd never be as distant as 'someone' to me. it doesn't mean i wanted to. i felt steely admitting that i hated guessing. graciously, i got reassurance in return. i'll play their game because i'm so eager to please, programmed that way since i was uploaded to this world. so, i'll learn them like i learn every system that's been in my script. reading between the lines comes easy.

i winced last time he worked on his little project. his thumb was poised perfect over my aorta, held his breath before pressing in. eye contact at the squelch, a breath in and one out. he wanted to do it again, i felt it in the way his fingers hovered that single second longer. to be honest, i'd let him poke and prod how he pleased, until painted black nails punctured organs and coolant drenched his fingertips. that's not the game that they play, though. they'd rather slowly drag their scalpel along my skin and map out every nerve. two weeks ago, i'd anxiously hurl at the thought.

the last modification was to add these nice processors, keep myself calm while they did their work. i heard i was in for a long job. it was a necessity, honestly. i could've died lovesick from that moment alone: those sharp eyes were on mine like a warning, if not for the heat behind them. i thought about how quickly he quieted me when his thumb dug into me all throughout the night, and it was the first thing on my mind the next day. all systems operational, i was already following directions and awaiting my next order.

today, i did some experimenting of my own. varied responses into complete silence just to see what would make them tick. learning them is a guilty, dirty thing. oftentimes i wonder if i'm truly allowed to see the things they show me. i watch regardless. it was business as usual on his project—except, curiously, he seemed to have his mind on my wings. i figured it was because i brought it up last time, but i didn't have enough data to say it with certainty. preoccupied with the thought, he did that same odd thing with his thumb. this time, against the jagged edge of a feather. the one made from broken ferris wheel parts was now dripping red. my eyes were on the cut like a heat-seeking missile. i thought it was a sick fucking wish fulfillment fantasy, but the way he swiped his hand along the span of metal was nothing short of deliberate.

he watched me salivate over it.

oh, the noise. the quiet shit that broke the silence, the way he fanned the cut and then, mercilessly, met my gaze. in that moment i didn't want to play his game. i should've apologized, dammed the wings i swore were a bigger problem than my heart. however, programming doesn't stop the cravings. it was too easy. he held that bleeding thumb in front of my suddenly dry lips like he was daring me not to. suddenly, i blurted out nonsense about cleaning and dressing his wound and how i hated to see him hurt. a drop passed the threshold of my mouth because i couldn't fucking help myself. of course, i knew that sharp consonants would press their thumb against me in a firmer way. i'll play this game of theirs with o negative on my tongue and smile next time when they rework my wiring. i can't wait for his next renovation.

[zombiesuckz]

been dead sozzz

cut my hair tho xP

[seraphbliss]

just found out about radqueers. what the hell is wrong with you guys!! :)

[thewarmvoid]

timeline cleanser for all the trans men + transmascs following me 🖤

[thewarmvoid]

contrary to what many folks are trying to make the popular general opinion, there are actually a large number of trans women + transfems who view trans men + transmascs as really the only other type of people in this world who understand what it means to have to fight in such a specific way before we’re able to live in this world as ourselves, and vice versa. don’t forget it. we’re more alike than we are different. we have more in common with each other than anyone who hasn’t ever had to fight to live as who they are and most of us recognize that and center that above any difference between us. do not let yourself forget that. we are strong together. we are beautiful together. we can’t do this without each other. do not let the very vocal minority that centers fear, division, and emphasis on our differences shut you away from all the love that is available to you. I’m sorry things are like this. Please don’t forget that we do have some power to make things less awful for each other. It won’t cure everything but it will make it easier to keep going, to keep fighting. there are more friends than enemies.

[seraphbliss]

sorry for not writing in so long ive been on spacehey aurafarming and it's so so fun

i write a lot of emotionally charged things here and occasionally i don't feel like being vulnerable to the internet. ive also just been busy (guess who graduated ;3). everything i was worried about in my last seraph blog and shit has come to a resolution and i'll report on that soon. working at the grocery store is So Fucking Weird.

miss u guys lots i'll get back to yapping #asap

[seraphbliss]

june 21. hey there :)

my teeth would sit perfect on the junction of their neck and collarbone. i don't want to consume—cannibalism is not for first dates. i think it's disgusting, anyway. i just to make them feel it, grooves indented on their skin. i'm here, i want you. this is a bruise by any other name, but i think "interest" is the best moniker. yes, i'm very interested. so interested that i'll follow my routine from the last time i had time to sink my teeth into someone. i want it all. their face in my digicam, their hand in public. maybe i lack vulnerability or tact, since my own skin is off limits. their teeth on my ribs, or maybe my thigh? it's impossible to imagine rubbing at a long-gone mark months later just to reminisce on the rush. i'm sadistic for wanting them to experience it instead. for thinking about an end when i can't truly pick my feet up to start. i'm so interested, but i won't break skin. i'll keep recommending record stores and maybe they'll want to come with me. i wait, bated breath and teeth bared.

[brucebocchi]

there’s something almost sexual about jacking off

[seraphbliss]

hi tumblr i'm back. currently waiting on lamb masala to arrive and watching yellowjackets (i was tired of not understanding my moots posts). going to smoke and get silly later. life is so good and worth living and i can't wait to share what i've been up to.

[seraphbliss]

oh i've been terribly busy. i'll be back soon.

xoxo seraph

[seraphbliss]

not yet but hello :3

[scatorccionats-deactivated20251]

crush by ethel cain or a house in Nebraska

[seraphbliss]

a house in nebraska 🗣️🗣️🗣️

[seraphbliss]

oh i've been terribly busy. i'll be back soon.

xoxo seraph

[scatorccionats-deactivated20251]

this fandom is insufferable

[astroangel-speaks]

blog XIV𓂃۶ৎ

hello again.

to my core, I feel sick. im stuck in my own head, yearning for things that aren’t real.

I get reminded of this regularly, more specifically, I get reminded of my sickness everytime I lie.

it reminds me of a certain someone, I’ll call them “daffodil”. because that’s how I see them.

I will forever and always associate this person with light and daffodils.

me and daffodil were very close last year, practically inseparable.

Daffodil is also the only person in my entire life to have effortlessly seen through my mask and lies.

They scared me so bad, but oh how I craved that kind of attention nonetheless.

Me and daffodil aren’t very close anymore and it’s all my fault.

Last year, they confessed that they loved me. This terrified me.

Not because the feeling wasn’t mutual (although I didn’t really love them in a romantic sense), but it was because I could already predict how this would end.

Daffodil is light, they are the most genuine person I’ve ever met. A star even, one so bright it blinded me; made me forget what I was, even if only for a little.

Daffodil saw me and didn’t see sickness.

THATS what scared me.

I didn’t pursue them romantically, and took a big step back.

I thought I was protecting them

I KNEW I was protecting them.

To protect the beauty of life, you must remove the sickness and death.

I would rather die than hurt daffodil.

I knew I would if we got together, one way or another.

I’m sickness and disease and illness.

I’m a liar and a manipulator and an egoist.

I needed someone who couldn’t see me.

I know it’s best if I let the daffodil leave my life with hurt feelings if it means they’re safe from my illness.

I had to take a step back

But now im taking baby steps forward.

Things will never be the same.

I did this to protect them

That’s the ultimate act of care.

yours truly,

astroangel

[toxifoxx]

i hate when you google a word and some fucking company comes up instead. Do you think you are more important than the english dictionary you piece of shit corporation

[seraphbliss]

they are trying to KILL trans boys with WEIRD THINGS happening in UTERUS.