Serious Social Issues @serioussocialissues - Tumblr Blog

All the Mass Shootings

I am truly disturbed at all the violence happening. No, it's not exactly NEW, however, it is more prevalent than before. I am saddened to see the state of humans, especially in this country. What are we, as a society doing wrong? How can we fix this? Confused. How about you?

Amy Jo Smith what happens when stress, anxiety and PTSD lead to insomnia? Some people don’t suffer from it but it makes things worse.

What happens is the body and mind become super tired and overwhelmed...and people do not understand this. It is an exhausting road that could lead to psychosis without proper help, treatment or a lot of self talk. It DEFINITELY makes things worse...been there, done that.

If you need to talk: [email protected]

Struggling

So my husband decided to start a new business...and I am co-owner. It's a baking business...so not my forte. I quit my job, am promoting and designing website, social media...etc. But really, this is his dream. And the worst part is, he thinks he knows everything about everything.

So, while super proud of him...and I truly am...and I truly believe in him...I'm tired...this ALL our married life has become about. My question to you is: how far would you go to support someone else's dream?

Email me at: [email protected] to let me know your thoughts.

The Time of Lin My mom’s name was Lin...she was an amazing woman. As some of you may know, she died 5 years ago...ok, maybe you didn’t know when, but you knew she died. I don’t know. The point is: my mom, Lin, died 5 years ago...as “celebrated” a week ago. The woman was my heart, soul and conscience...Mom or not, she was there to tell me when I did good, or not-so-good. She was the glue to our family...she kept everyone talking...she kept everyone close. The thing is...it is seeming like the time of Lin is ending. The relationships she wanted to last are not lasting; the things she tried to teach are fading. As silly as it sounds, this started in my mind because I folded a pair of underwear different than she taught me. But I realized: it’s not just that which has changed...it’s everything. I wonder what she would say...I wonder if she would accept that things change. I know she would want “us” to keep a part of her alive. But everyone is moving on and the time of Lin is changing. The time of Lin seems to be gone. I suppose we each, those of us who mattered to her, keep her alive in our own ways, but I also know that we are not honoring what she wanted...we let go. We moved on. Some would say, “that’s the way it goes” and I would say: but what about what she wanted? Funny...isn’t it? In the end, this is all there is...people moving forward...the past is gone...over time, all of her will be gone. All of US will be gone. So why do we even bother to teach traditions? Everything changes...over time. And now I have to see: the time of Lin is changing.

Getting Older

Lately, I have been feeling my “age”...things are physically hard, I move a little slower. The thing is, my brain does’t feel as old as my body does; it’s quite conflicting.

I have so many things I’d still like to do...places I’d like to see. I realize, however, that I am getting older. I am just a few years from 50...my mother died when she was 63...what does that mean for me? If I take after her, I don’t have ALL that much time to do the things I’d like to...which scares me.

I feel the changes in my body. I recall thinking that my mother exaggerated, that she wasn’t all that old. I now find myself apologizing to the Heavens for having doubted her. I guess I suffer from what most of us do - the belief that we’re going to be young forever.

I remember watching my mother’s mind go...that was the hardest, especially for her. She would have moments of clarity and realize that she was losing her mind, and it really hurt her. I wonder: is that what’s in store for me? Is ALL of what she went through in store for me?

The point: what if I don’t have that much time left? There’s so much I want to do with my husband...my best friend. The truth is: we get too busy with life and current situations that we push some of our desires aside. Not the short term ones, like immediate gratification ones, but the ones that are like, “one day I would like to go to Colorado,” ones, We take for granted the time we have on this beautiful Earth. I, for one, still have so much I’d like to see....I would like to see them with him...the man I love. But we’re so busy with LIFE. And we’re not getting any younger.

I guess I should say that there are some things that make being older great...but honestly, it’s not like it used to be when elders were revered for all their wisdom and experience. It is nice to not having to play dating games, to know who you’re going to share things with...to know that you have each other’s back. The sad part, though, is that it took so long to find and now I feel like there are so many things I’d like to share with him, but time and resources are limited.

Getting older is hard...realizing you took your youth for granted is hard. I say, now that I know, enjoy it while you have it. Have fun, be silly...tomorrow is never guaranteed.

Video Games as Therapy

Sometimes, I have problems with looping thoughts; my mind is like a bunch of noise exploding at the speed of light. I got to really figuring out how to quiet things down-I've been trying TV and music, but it didn't work. Neither did Facebook or reading. So I realized, the one thing that causes total distraction for me are video games...you don't have to think about what was bothering you before because you can't. You have to concentrate on what you're doing. This provides a break in the loop. You also won't be looping in the game since you progress levels and beat differing missions or objectives. And sometimes, playing a fighting game (my personal fave Soul Calibur) is just what you need if you're having a panic attack. Therefore, I say video games are a form of therapy; a kind of mind reset button, if you will.

However, they can become a source of addiction and unhealthy coping skills, as well. Balance. Moderation.

Out loud

If I speak the words out loud, then they become true...the problem is: I don't want the truth this time.

I suppose some would call that denial and avoidance-which is exactly correct. Eventually the words will be spoken because that's the progression of things, but for now, the ignorance blankets-even if it is a self-imposed delusion.

Sometimes, we have to take the truth in small doses and that's okay. :)

My Darling Daughter

This has been floating around for a while and it is beautiful. Please share.

My dear girl, the day you see I'm getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I'm going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don't interrupt to say: "You said the same thing a minute ago"... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. When I don't want to take a bath, don't be mad and don't embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don't look at me that way ... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life's issues every day... the day you see I'm getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I'm going through. If I occasionally lose track of what we're talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can't, don't be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don't let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don't feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I'll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I've always had for you, I just want to say, I love you ... my darling daughter.

yourborderlinepersonality

serioussocialissues

Good lesson.

Happy Mother's Day

To all those loving and caring Mom's out there...have a wonderful day.

Woman Missing Since 1988

The reason this case stands out to me is that her husband claims she is still alive, but ran off. However, the husband was also known to have threatened her and then she suddenly disappears. Statistically, in cases such as this, the husband turns out to be the responsible party. Please take a look and pass it along. There is far more information on the site below than I've posted here.

Joan Bernal

#Doe Network #joan bernal #missing person

Long Time

It has been a long time since I checked in or wrote anything here. I guess you could say there have been many changes in my life...which have been more like a roller coaster with extreme highs and extreme lows keeping my mind busy. Some things have changed for the better, some for the not so better.

As the holidays come and go, I realize how much innocence seems lost as I grow older. I envy those (especially children) who see this as such a magical time of year. However, with the killing of 20 school children in Connecticut, it seems difficult to fathom that even now people are capable of such cruelty. Am I surprised? NO. Am I disappointed? You bet. Let's face it, violence is senseless enough, but to turn it willfully and on purpose towards people's lives who have not even begun is simply mind-boggling.

To be honest, it's times like these that I would not mind if the Mayan calendar had been correct and that the world would end on 12-21. I know--that sounds jaded and horrible; as though I'm not looking at the rest of the beauty in the world. Still, I wonder: is this what is left of humanity? The dinosaurs reigned far longer than humanoids...as far as I'm concerned, the human race is a failed experiment because as far bad as we can look, mankind has always been horrendous to one another...there has ALWAYS been violence. At least the dinosaurs did not kill for fun--they killed for survival...what's our excuse?

I know there will be those who say I am a pessimist, and I cannot say those people are wrong. What I can say, however, is that I am tired of seeing the worst in human nature. The only time we all come together is during mass tragedy--such as 911 or the school shootings. We are capable of such great things, yet daily choose to do the selfish, thoughtless and hurtful things to one another.

It is sad...and none of us want to believe we are bad people. Yet, if that is true, why are there so many bad people? Why do we hurt the ones we love the most?

"I want a divorce."

OK, so I came across this and it was more touching than I anticipated. I wanted to share.

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now. The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband…. The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you. If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Jesse Davis, one of the defendants in the Cady Way Trail murders, is claiming mental illness (he DOES have a long history of it) to the degree that he is incompetent to stand trial. What do you think?

Casey Anthony-One Year Later

I recently wrote an article for Examiner called: Casey Anthony: One year later recapping what's been going on during the year since the not guilty verdict. Two things are happening for Anthony; one, she's getting off of probation as of Friday, August 24th, 2012 and the other, her civil trial begins on August 28th.

Do you think Anthony will continue to have problems, even after her probation is over? Do you think she'll leave Florida once the civil trial is over? What are your opinions on the Anthony trial, investigation and verdict now that a year has gone by?

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