- absolutely nothing -

live from my swamp 23 ✡️ situated in germany

[single-nachtmahr-in-your-area]

Ich möchte meine elektronische Patientenakte einsehen.

Ich informiere mich auf der Webseite meiner Krankenkasse, wie das funktioniert.

Ich lade die Krankenkassen-App auf mein Handy.

Die App stürzt mehrfach ab.

Beim fünften Versuch öffnet sich die App.

Ich möchte mich über die Zweit-App der Krankenkasse, die zur Identifikation nötig ist, identifizieren.

Ich finde heraus, dass ich keine PIN für meine Krankenkassenkarte habe.

Die App informiert mich, dass ich auch meine eID zur Identifikation nutzen kann.

Ich installiere die Personalausweis-App.

Ich suche das alte Schreiben raus, das ich damals mit meinem Personalausweis bekommen habe.

Ich rubble die Transport-PIN frei.

Nach fünf Jahren lassen sich die Zahlen unter der freigerubbelten Fläche nicht mehr lesen.

Die Webseite meiner Kommune verweist mich auf eine Webseite der Bundesregierung, über die eine neue Brief-PIN beantragt werden kann.

Die Webseite der Bundesregierung informiert mich, dass es diesen Brief-Service seit Jahren nicht mehr gibt.

Ich vereinbare einen Termin beim für mich zuständige Amt, um eine neue PIN setzen zu lassen.

Ich gehe zum zuständige Amt und tippe dort eine neue PIN für meinen Personalausweis ein.

Ich gehe nach Hause und richte die Onlinefunktion meines Personalausweises ein.

Ich öffne die Krankenkassen-App.

Sie stürzt ab.

ich installiere die Krankenkassen-App neu.

Sie hängt sich auf.

Ich identifiziere mich nach zwei Versuchen erfolgreich mit meinem Personalausweis in der zur Identifikation nötigen Zweit-App der Krankenkasse.

Ich öffne die Krankenkassen-App.

Ich klicke auf das Feld "elektronische Patientenakte".

Die App sagt "Ein unbekannter Fehler ist aufgetreten."

ich schreie.

[doomdoomofdoom]

Shoutout Lars Keitel, Bürgermeister von Friedrichsdorf, funniest motherfucker alive.

Mehr Politikerinnen sollten sowas machen.

[dhs-in-disguise]

I would like to note “Hätte hätte Fahrradkette“ as one of the best German phrases once more

[echtsalty]

top five things ive learned about germany from deutsche tumblr

5. ritter sport forbidden flavors

4. the primary german language fanfiction topics: tatort and german politicians (?)

3. Deutsche Bahn fucking sucks

2. die Maus is a nonbinary icon

1. berndt das brot

[kevin-kuehnert-official]

AAAAAALTER FICK DOCH DIE DEUTSCHE BAHN WAS SOLL DENN DIESE SCHEIßE FICK DAS VERKEHRSMINISTERIUM FICK DIE CDU FICKT DICH DEUTSCHE BAHN DEUTSCHE BAHN VERSTAATLICHEN

[clementine-kesh]

the big three questions of media analysis: what the author wanted to say, what they actually said, and what they didn’t know they were saying

[clementine-kesh]

for the last one i don’t just mean oh the author inadvertently wrote in gay subtext or whatever i’m talking about media as a cultural artifact which can reveal a ton about societal norms, biases, ideals, etc. it’s all about positionality and an unexamined positionality is often the most revealing of all

[rumbleonthemill]

fourth question: what kind of world do we live in, and how do people twist and turn the artist's message

[green-mug-tomato-juice]

glaskartoffel

[cvntybal]

BROOOOOOOOOO SEASON 4 IS STILL POSSIBLE LETS GO

[courfee]

in german we don't say "I currently have an art/writer's block", we say "Ich bin grad in nem KreaTief" and I think that's beautiful

[funnieshaha]

[westasianblues]

its amazing how people will form entire opinions like “this person is an evil fascist” based on second and third sources heavily biased towards the side that opposes any and all meaningful dialogue with those who have differences of opinion instead of yknow going directly to the source and watching with their own eyes and listening with their own ears to see what that person does and is about. and maybe finding that, actually that person isn’t evil at all, and they are being manipulated by media that wants to polarize us and keep us from talking to each other which is exactly the sort of thing that person was trying to combat. and now, that person is dead, and the polarization only gets worse.

[ibikus]

i find it questionable how much the german media is reporting on charlie kirk. like, why are you giving so much screentime to an american fascist most people hadn't even heard about? who the german alt-right is now happily instrumentalizing thanks to your exposure? we have home-grown fascists, just saying.

[prettywordsonpaper]

Ich schreibe nur intellektuell anspruchsvolle fanfics

Edit: Leute, ich hab's gepostet!

[huariqueje]

The Landing - Peter Brown

British,b. 1967 -

Oil on canvas ,  35 x 30 in. 89 x 76 cm.

[urlittledove-deactivated2025102]

Ich liebe Dialekte omg ja bitte rede mit mir auf platt oder bayrisch oder hessisch oder fränkisch ich versteh kein wort aber das ist sooo cool und unfassbar wichtig für den Erhalt!!!!!

[ukyokuonji]

It's really telling that no one on the yt ass app has talked about how ICE has just been given more power to abuse the latine and immigrant community. I know it's all been "charlie kirk this, charlie kirk that" but that doesn't detract from that fact that on Monday, September 8th the supreme court ruled that ice can detain based solely on having brown skin or "looking latine," speaking Spanish or speaking English with an accent, being present at locations that have migrant workers, or the type of work they have.

When this news broke my dad told me and my siblings, all of us who are US Citizens, born and raised in the US, that we have to carry some form of official documentation on us, especially because we live in a city that has been heavily targeted by the Trump administration for being a sanctuary city. My grandmother was staying with us and even though she is my non-latine grandmother, and she's a US citizen, my dad and aunt made the decision to have my dad drive her back home to New Jersey because she has an accent and her documents are back home.

As someone who is latine and south asian, I need you to know that this will not just affect latine people! My non-latine cousin was pulled over by ice about two weeks ago just for being brown! However this will disproportionately affect latine people. Just today ICE was seen on the street by my home and my work! One of my duties at work is to make sure that ICE does not come into our elementary school because we're a predominantly latine school. I HAVE TO MAKE SURE ICE DOES NOT KIDNAP 5 YEAR OLDS. That is the reality of the situation.

I want it to be known that I have been scared before because I'm living as a person of color in the United States. I have been scared before because of being a south asian born post 9/11. I have been scared before being a latina growing up during the Dreamer movement, despite being a citizen. However, before this week I have never been scared enough to feel the need to carry documentation proving I am a citizen of the damn country I was born in! Now I feel that scared though. Especially because a few months ago, for the first time in my life, someone assumed I didn't speak English. Another person of color assumed I didn't speak English and shit talked me in the CVS aisle because they assumed I didn't speak English. And then a week ago I also got mistaken for not speaking English when I went to the doctor's office and chatted with the receptionist in Spanish and then was handed Spanish paperwork to fill out.

Anyways, the point is the fact that I have seen maybe two? three? posts about this on here is upsetting and immensely telling. Speak up. Talk about the fact that this is happening because it will not stop with targeting latines. It will become worse. It already is because the government is going to punish immigrants for "making light of" charlie kirk's death. Not for celebrating, or joking, for making light of.

This silence is astounding. It's not surprising, but it is just astounding to see how little y'all truly care about brown people and immigrants.

[frocio]

i love it when italians argue about italian. like we don’t even know how our language really works we just roll with it

[frocio]

[iphisesque]

Italian is 107 different provincial languages stuck together with spit and half a prayer

[frogcoded]

My bf lives in another region and we are constantly arguing about regional variations of words and we both live in the fucking north of Italy

[putaemo-cional]

one time i saw a map of italy but instead of cities and roads etc it was just covered w different ways you can say the word vagina. it was covered

[frocio]

oh I can think of at least seven ways to say the word vagina right off the top of my head rn. I can’t imagine what I could do if I tried harder

[criptochecca]

Fjgkahfmangksoajufnajejgnanfjakirjvjjs

[fishbizkit]

this is the Italian Vagina Map, reblog to… I’m not sure actually. Can’t hurt though. 

[cannot-think-of-a-cute-name]

reblog to Italian season your pussy