like many other days, i've found myself staring at this again today. the spider web window crack. the dangerous, moon-edged shadow. the recognition and resignation in those eyes. the blood, the blood, the blood...
i think about this piece all the time, even if it's not something you think twice about. i'm still in awe. to see my writing brought to life... i'm just never going to get over it.
Do I know what the ballroom au is? Yes. Am I begging you to talk about it and drop a snippet anyway? Yes yes please. <3
omg 🥰 hiiiii! thank you for indulging my most indulgent wip. picking just one snippet is SO HARD, i have so many scenes and ideas that i love from this au, picking is brutal, but i will do my best!
so, the ballroom au is pretty much exactly what it sounds like: the smosh cast as ballroom dancers. i have so much inside baseball knowledge, and it's always fun to make your own favorite interests central to the drama! some highlights that aren't going to fit in the snippet: tommy and amanda are american smooth partners, ian and anthony are retired (?) standard dancers/world champions who own the studio, spencer is the music mixer/dj/social dance expert, shayne and courtney are international latin dancers, and trevor, arasha, chanse, and angela are a whole mess who have a very complex partner-and-style switching system that gives ian a headache.
i don't know if this full fic will every see the light of day, so if anyone's ever interested in more, let me know! snippet under the cut. it's a peek into one of ian and anthony's practices, but i have so much more, and fun bits with everyone! sorry if it's a little long!
“Fix your fucking turn out!” Anthony hissed, recovering from their stumble.
“Well, loosen your fucking topline! I’m just trying to stay upright,” Ian snapped, rolling his shoulders as they dropped frame and slowed their momentum, separating to walk it off. Ian’s shoulders ached and burned in an unusual way. Holding frame for entire practices was a dull, familiar kind of discomfort, but resisting the compression of Anthony’s arms today was brutal. “Your frame is suffocating!”
“I can’t loosen up when I’m not sure where the hell your foot’s gonna go!”
“My feet are going exactly where they need to.”
“And are they turned out when they get there?”
Ian didn’t answer, he just glared. Hard.
“Riiight,” Anthony drew the word out. “But you’re right, it’s all my fault.”
“I didn’t say that! I said—”
“Yeah, I heard you,” Anthony cut him off. He swiped at his brow with the black cuff of his practice shirt, and sighed. “Maybe we should just—”
“If you say quit,” Ian cut him off, a dangerous warning in his voice, “then forget about tomorrow. And any other day after that. I told you, we take this seriously or not at all.”
The anger fled from his body, doused in the ice-cold realization of what he’d just said. The ultimatum. He didn’t regret it—he meant it—but he was suddenly very afraid that Anthony was going to agree. That he was going to realize what a mistake this had all been. That he was going to realize he didn’t want to be Ian’s partner again after all. That maybe Ian wasn’t worth the trouble.
Anthony tilted his head and the glare in his eyes melted into something a little more hurt. “Do you think I want to quit?” he asked quietly.
Ian sighed, scrubbing a hand through his sweat-damp hair. He sat down right there on the hardwood studio floor, all of his muscles groaning with relief. “Three hours of practice and we’ve gotten nowhere,” he said. “What else were you going to say?”
Anthony closed the distance and sat down beside Ian. He looked tired, up close like that. “I get why you doubt me, you know,” Anthony said. “But I know how seriously we’re taking this. I agreed to it. I want to dance with you.”
“Yeah.” Ian picked intently at the suede sole of his shoe, intentionally avoiding Anthony’s gaze. “But . . . I don’t get why.”
Anthony gave a tired, airy chuckle, and Ian couldn’t help but sneak a peek up at Anthony’s face. “Ian, no offense, but your opinion is the last one I’d trust about partnering with you.”
“What the hell does that mean?” Ian demanded, but the flash of hostility between them had already passed.
A pensive look crossed Anthony’s face, like he was weeding through all the things he wanted to say, but ultimately, he just shook his head. “I don’t want any other partner, Ian. I don’t want to do this with anyone else. And I want to do this.”
Ian could put two and two together. Anthony wanted to do this with him. And only with him. “Anthony, you could—”
Anthony’s leg flicked over the hardwood and kicked Ian’s knee. “I swear, if you’re about to tell me some bullshit ‘you could dance with anyone,’ one, no I couldn’t, two, I don’t want to, and three, you’re my partner. That’s why you piss me the hell off like that.”
Ian rubbed his knee and scowled. “Sounds toxic.”
“Welcome to ballroom, bitch,” Anthony said with the driest humor Ian had ever heard from him.
so, uh. bad ending is kind of what it says on the tin. it's the bad ending of my crime au fic, 'i'm coming for you again.' i doubt it will ever fully see the light of day because it's depressing as hell, but it is technically a wip. let's call it a writing exercise. how each of the cast would meet their end and in what order really grabbed me, but i warn you, below (while 1000% an au) is a little gory and kinda sad, so. read at your own risk? but thank you so much for asking!! 💜 even if it's depressing, i still really like it. (also, completely unedited so i apologize for ugly/unclear phrasing and any mistakes)
It was Shayne first. It was always going to be Shayne first, but the moment it happened Ian saw his whole world burn down like Cassandra saw the razing of Troy.
The right thing to do would have been to keep getting Chanse to safety, protect him like Shayne had, let Courtney and Damien take care of the gunman. It’s what Shayne would have wanted. It’s what he had died doing.
Ian didn’t do that.
He ran, took a bullet in the shoulder for it, and disarmed the man. Took the gun, turned it back on Shayne's killer before he could even look scared. Shot him right between the eyes, red and messy. Blood and something a little more solid sprayed across Ian’s glasses.
He felt the others begin to flee, but he didn’t care.
He heard Damien scream, and Ian’s chest hurt. Far too soon, he’d never hear Damien again.
He turned and saw Courtney skidding to their knees beside Damien. Ian knew that Shayne’s body was between them, but he felt like he couldn’t see it. There was a body there, bleeding from the neck, dead, but his brain blurred the edges, made it hard to see.
Chanse was gone, made himself scarce. He was the only one with the right instincts. Ian found him around the corner, grey faced and shaking, but hiding. Smart. It wouldn’t matter. He had the right instincts, but the first domino had already fallen.
@lilac-hecox tagged me in her post. i've had the most intense, terrible writer's block for almost a year now, and it's kind of dimmed the light i used to get when i was writing. it's not a resolution, but i am really hoping to actually write again this year. fingers crossed, and this could be a fun way to get inspired again, hopefully.
rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous and tag as many people as you have wips. people send an ask with the title that most intrigues them, then you post a snippet or tell them something about it!
icfya final chapter
ny2016
ballroom au
bad ending
pierced
red wine supernova
some of these are very much more "w" and some are very much more "ip", and if you're curious about any, i still exist! i'm just battling my demons that don't want me to write, so please feel free to talk/ask. i'm a flaky, shaky writer, but i don't bite.
i also don't have too many people to tag, so if you're reading this and you're so inclined, do this, tag me, and i'll make sure i drop an ask about one of your titles!
both @whiskeythefishski and @lilac-hecox tagged me in this game!
List the first lines of your last 20 stories. See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Then tag 10 authors!
i... do not have 20 fics, but i'll do the ones i have!
"Anthony doesn't drink much at all these days so he feels like he got hit by the alcohol a little harder than he meant to, but he doesn't mind it." (Take Me There, with the caveat that this is my first line, lilac wrote the actual first line)
"Fifteen was an eventful year for Ian." (nothing in the sky above us)
"It’s a stormy day in LA." (like an old dog lying by a new gravestone)
"Ian just about cracked his phone." (Reflection)
"Ian grimaced." (i'm coming for you again)
"A place in the universe." (Love Like Magic)
"“Hey, dude,” Anthony called out, leaned over the counter in the kitchen, eating his lunch while scrolling on his laptop, when he heard Ian close the front door." (Snake Bites)
"Courtney didn’t cry, but she wanted to." (there's danger in the things you say)
"Anthony leaves." (let's make it worth it)
"Anthony throws his controller to the ground and lets out a strangled noise of frustration, tipping back and pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes." (a broken heart looks good on you)
"Anthony watches the room empty out, and looks for Erin in the crowd." (Good Boy)
"Courtney giggled as she grabbed the wall, toeing off her shoe in the entryway." (Please, Milord, May I Have Another?)
"There’s a fine line when it comes to the old texts." (bury my heart underneath these trees)
i had a feeling i'd kinda know my own pattern and i was right. my preference is for short, declarative statements. the longer, more descriptive opening sentences are few and far between for me, which i think is a shortcoming of mine. i tend to drop in on an action, or at the very least a statement, and just start running without letting my reader get a strong sense of where they are or what's going on.
i still really like the first line of bury my heart underneath these trees, i think, despite the fact that it isn't particularly clear or descriptive.
i don't really have anyone to tag 👉👈 but if you're a writer and want to do this it's very fun!
total number of ao3 works: 15, but we don't need to talk about 3 of them... oh, and one was posted anonymously because i was nervous about it, so on my profile it'll probably only list 14.
total ao3 word count: 255,221.
fandoms i’ve written for: what i've written for and what i've published are very different! i've published works for smosh, buffy the vampire slayer (yeesh), and naruto (YEESH), but i've written for almost everything i've ever been a fan of. sailor moon, spn, dc comics/bat fam, critical role, freakin' gossip girl, if i've cared about it, i've written for it! i'm just most often writing for an audience of one.
top five fics by kudos: (note: i wish i was doing this for just smosh fic, but this is from my ao3 as a whole!)
Shelter - naruto
i'm coming for you again - smosh, also my pride and joy
Reflection - smosh
Good Boy - smosh
We Could Be Magic - smosh
do i respond to comments?: i do! i went through a moment within the last year, though, where i got scared of "artificially inflating" how appealing my fics look because i always respond to comments but i try not to let that happen anymore. i AT LEAST owe someone a thank you for taking time to tell me they liked something about my writing, and i love telling them how it made me feel to read their comment. i'm not always the fastest to respond anymore, but i love responding to comments!
what has the most angst ridden ending?: that would require i finish things. no, um... a broken heart looks good on you is, i think, my angstiest ending. i love angst but a lot of my works are a) unfinished and b) typically at least ambiguous? but i think that's probably the angstiest ending (especially if you don't read the sequel).
what has the happiest ending?: i say i love angst and i swear i do, but looking over all my stories i think i actually have a fair amount of happy endings. Love Like Magic is very unambiguously happy in the most traditional sense. Snake Bites has a fluffy little ending too, but it doesn't hit the kind of lows i typically write so idk if it hits as "happy" as other happy endings. and then my personal favorite happy end is let's make it worth it. maybe not the happiest, but for me it's the best happy end i've written.
have i received hate?: i got one kinda nasty comment on my big bang fic but i think it might have been a bot. and my friends came to my defense so fast 🥰
do i write smut? if so, what kind?: yup! i'm not sure exactly what "kind" means here, but i really enjoy writing smut! i think it can do so much character work. i remember being absolutely terrified to publish my first smut, but it's gotten easier. i've been wanting to write some more lately, but i've been stuck on what to write.
do i write crossovers?: not really. not since my middle school self wrote a sailor moon/atla fic for funsies. i used to when i was young, before i even really knew i was writing fanfic, but i'd say no, i don't write crossovers.
have i ever had a fic stolen?: not to my knowledge!
have i ever had a fic translated?: nope! that would be so cool though. i'm a translation fanatic, but i can't supply anything useful to that community, i only have rusty skills in dead languages.
have i ever co-written a fic?: @lilac-hecox and i are trying to publish a little rp thing, and if it goes well maybe we'll do a little more? i have an absolute BLAST writing with her and she pushes me to be a better writer, so i hope so!
a WIP i’ll never finish?: HA. god. most of my works? but again, that's because they're just for me. all of my smosh fics have planned endings, so if you're curious those WILL be finished, but i'd say the two naruto fics and the buffy fic are pretty much in the "never finish" category. they may get a chapter here or there, but i think they're probably never going to get a proper ending.
writing strengths: i've been staring at this for, like... half an hour. i had to ask lilac for some help (thank you lilac!!) and she said my prose, my humor, and my world building. i'll take that!
writing weaknesses: i'm absolutely terrible at endings. i don't think i'm good at fluff. i have a surprisingly hard time generating ideas on my own (it's much easier for me to talk things through but i rarely do). i rely a lot on metaphor. i can get pretty lazy/loose with grammar. it takes me forever to write. oh, and i can't write a physical description to save my life. are all of my characters wearing clown clothes? well, i never tell you what they are wearing so maybe.
do i like foreign language dialogue?: i love languages, so it's very cool to see it from people who know what they're doing!
first fandom i wrote for: i truly do not know, that is probably lost in a notebook or binder somewhere, and i likely didn't even know it was fic at the time. maybe something pokemon or sailor moon?
favorite fic i’ve written: this is such a hard question! do i truly like anything i've written? but seriously, i'm coming for you again is something i'm very proud of, as is the one-two punch of a broken heart looks good on you/let's make it worth it, and then very selfishly i've always held bury my heart underneath these trees very dear. it's not my most popular, and maybe not even all that good but it has a special place in my heart.
i don't know many people, and i think everyone i do know has already been tagged and i don't want to bug them with another tag, but if YOU are reading this and you want to do it then i tag you!
just had to say.. amazing as always. literally fucking PERFECT story. im so obsessed with this fic its actually nonsensical. you are incredible.
my favorite part is all the spommy but im also just like horribly biased.
😭 this makes me so unbelievably happy!! you have no idea the confidence boost it was to see this message 💜
i've said it before but i'll repeat myself, it's so foreign to me that people would like something i wrote enough to reread it, but also so encouraging. especially with love like magic because i felt very shaky and unsure about that one, but your words about it have stuck with me since you posted and... it just means everything to me.
i'm SO happy you loved the spommy! i haven't written a solo spommy story solely for the fact that their voices are so particular and it's important to me to nail them. i don't know that i could do them true justice, but it's something i want to write more of if i can manage it!
there's a lot to pick from! i have... so many unfinished things. i'm going to pick a piece from the year of the otp challenge that i'm theoretically doing but i am extremely, extremely behind on. this one is for @lilac-hecox who picked the prompt bdsm au, but i would definitely just tag it more as light dom/sub undertones on ao3. i'm kind of stalled out and unable to write any actual nsfw lately, though, so even this is just more about power dynamics. the impetus was anthony's (once) new dermal and ear piercings.
Do you like it? His eyes ask, but nothing about Ian offers an answer. He’s still just observing. “You can touch it.” Me.
The corner of Ian’s mouth turns up, then down, then back to neutral in a flash. “Wouldn’t that hurt?”
Yes. “Not really.”
Ian gives him a flat look, this one entirely readable. He sees right through that ploy. “Anthony,” he says.
Anthony gives him a caught little grin. “Not a lot,” he corrects himself. “Touch it.”
Ian makes a face, like he’s a little freaked out and his brows knit together in doubt. He isn’t uninterested, though, that much Anthony sees. “Touch it,” he encourages again, even quieter, breathier.
Ian’s first knuckle comes up and swipes at it so lightly Anthony isn’t convinced there’s really any contact, which is confirmed when Ian says, “No. Later.”
this is set after 'i'm coming for you again'! i'm super excited about it. i made another post about it earlier with nearly no spoilers, but since i got asked for it twice i figured i'd feed a second snippet but fair warning! this one is a little heavier on the spoilers! this fic makes me smile, though :)
Courtney looked incredible. Big, thick-soled, black leather boots and the tiniest, tightest strip of luxurious white fabric wrapped around them, strapless and with one of the highest hemlines Ian had ever seen. A huge swath of fabric billowed dramatically out from the back like a peacock tail, and a tiny birdcage veil sat artfully lopsided on the side of their head.
“Holy shit,” he muttered, shaking his head.
Courtney smiled. “Yeah? I mean, it’s a lot, but what the hell else am I stealing so much money for?”
“You look great,” Anthony said, swooping in and saving Ian from his chronic foot-in-mouth disease. “I assume this is why the tuxes?”
Courtney snapped and pointed at him. “You’re a regular private dick.”
“So I’ve been told,” Anthony chuckled, shooting a glance at Ian.
“You’re getting married?” Ian asked skeptically. “To which one?”
this is set in my crime/murder au! i'll give a slight, slight spoiler warning, but this isn't giving much away. if you want to know NOTHING about how 'i'm coming for you again' might end, then don't look, but i think it's pretty inconsequential.
“Ian, wake up!”
Ian groaned, blinking groggily as he sat up, searching for the source of the voice: Anthony. He mumbled some amalgamation of sounds that he meant to articulate, “What’s wrong, why are you waking me up so early?” but came out more like, “wh-huh?”
Anthony shoved a screen in his face, the blue light so bright Ian snapped his eyes shut again. “Anthony!” He waved blindly in front of himself, randomly connecting with his partner’s arm. “I just woke up and I don’t have my glasses on.”
“Fine, Velma,” Ian felt the slide of thin metal over the top of his ears, and the light dimmed against his closed eyelids. “But get it together.”
Ian peeked one eye open again, and he could see Anthony in front of him on the bed, bedhead a tangled mess, holding his phone out to Ian.
“You got one too, but just read mine,” he gestured with his phone.
Ian took the phone, still a little cranky, until he clapped a hand over his mouth to muffle his gasp.
it's very apt that you picked that one :) it's the working title for my next funeralverse fic! it's my attempt to bring in most of the other funeral characters. alternatively, i might name it 'meet me at the edge' but i haven't made my decision yet. the true struggle is figuring out whether to switch povs or not, but as it stands i'll post a little bit of what i have for amanda's pov under the cut!
“It’s alright,” she says. “Keep these dry for me.” She points to the clothes pooled at her feet. “I’ll be cold when I get back.”
She wades in waist deep and the water is somehow colder than ice, painful. She wonders if the water was this cold, last time. She can’t remember, she was too panicked to notice. “Pull me out once I’m gone,” she says. It should be a command, but it sounds like a plea.
She blinks, looking over her shoulder at the Fathers on the bank. As the three of them meet each other’s gazes, locking promises, Amanda blinks and reveals herself, more than naked, and they do the same in return. One set of white eyes, one red, and one black.
Before she can worry, before she can back out, Amanda takes a deep breath and goes under. The water is so cold. It bites and hurts. Everything is so cold and Amanda can’t think through it. Air leaves her, rippling towards the surface in bubbles like mercury.
Sink, she thinks. Remembers.
Sink.
She doesn’t feel like she gets any closer to the bottom of the river, but the surface gets farther and farther away. She’s going lower somehow, even though the earth never gets closer. It only gets colder, but there’s a point where cold changes to burning. It’s not hot, it’s not cold, it’s just burning. Amanda closes her eyes and when she opens them she sees flames. In the center of the flames she sees a girl.
Then she hears her.
The screams are deafening, desperate, painful. Amanda feels torn in two just listening to them.
i got tagged by both @lilac-hecox and @whiskeythefishski
Rules are: Post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! And tag as many people as you have wips!
i definitely don't know as many people as i have wips, and about two thirds of them have already tagged me (hi lilac, hi whiskey!), but i want to participate anyway since they were lovely enough to tag me! i'm not prolific and i'm TERRIBLY slow, but this is my wip list! this isn't every single one of my wips, but the ones opened most recently, at least. i do tend to save things under absolute nonsense abbreviations, but i'll write them out with their names where applicable. some have titles, some are just kinda ~descriptions~
icfya 16 (i'm coming for you again ch 16)
nitsau 2 (nothing in the sky above us ch 2)
ndeitc (no dry eye in the chapel)
change me at all costs (starlight and star-crossed)
piercings
iabp (the journey to blackpool)
prmpt (misc. prompt wips)
i've pretty much just got @chu-tea to tag, but no pressure love! only if you're dying to chat writing 💜
Hey I just wanted to let you know I found your fic series "caught between a spark and lightning" this year and I feel like it rewired my brain. I love your writing style and the way you capture characters' voices. Eagerly awaiting whatever you happen to write next!
this is just. so kind. thank you?? i have trouble nailing down a style, but one of my favorite things to try and nail is character voices, so this means SO MUCH to me!!! and i'm so, so flattered. the series is a labor of love for sure, and there's more coming. i just can't tell you how much this encouragement means to me 💜 truly, this has made my entire week so worth it. thank you for taking the time to tell me, it's very generous of you, and definitely spurs me on to go write some more! thank you so much!!
ok, so sorry if this ask has been sent multiple times, my phone is being dumb rn. I love your crime au, and I just wanted to send you this song that made me think of the way you write ianthony in that au!
https://open.spotify.com/track/1H3gGIIkTPtBfasqsi9kme?si=pbmLRSZKQw6P2t8y-ReNgA
I don’t know if it fits perfectly, but it reminded me of your fics and I wanted to share it and let you know how much I love your writing!
this is so incredibly kind and meaningful to me, thank you. i know i've been slacking finishing it, but goodbyes are hard and, honestly, it's felt like there isn't much of a place for it or me in the smosh fandom lately, but the fact that you love it means i will finish it. especially if you love it enough to come tell me and give me a wonderful song to add to my playlist for that fic. maybe i'm overly sappy, but writing's been so hard lately, you have no idea how encouraging this was for me, thank you 💜
'Bobby shared the secrets of my soul/ Standing right beside me, Lord, through everything I've done/ Every night she kept me from the cold,' and, 'And I'd give all my tomorrows for a single yesterday/ Holding Bobby's body close to mine' feel so true to that au, ugh, that speared me through the heart. thank you so much both for your kind words and for this song. both of them made me really happy ☺️
inspired (and encouraged) by @lilac-hecox, i've done an ao3 wrapped! i try very hard not to attach too much to any numbers, but data is definitely fun. i've had some highs and lows with my own work, more than ever before, but this is a great way to look over it all at the end of the year.
works this year: 11
word count: 170,940
hits: 18,277
bookmarks: 351
top five by hits:
1. i'm coming for you again
2. Reflection
3. Good Boy
4. Love Like Magic
5. let's make it worth it
top five by kudos:
1. i'm coming for you again
2. Reflection
3. Good Boy
4. Snake Bites
5. let's make it worth it
top five by comments:
1. i'm coming for you again
2. Love Like Magic
3. there's danger in the things you say
4. Reflection
5. Good Boy
longest: i'm coming for you again
shortest: lord i've already fallen
main character i wrote: by word count it's ian, by number of published works it's anthony
events: smosh big bang, anthony's day, and ian's day! if you sent a request for one of the boys' days and i haven't filled it yet, it IS in my to-write list. these last few months have just been hell, and i haven't been able to get through writing much at all. but know that i take each request seriously and they're coming!
my personal favorite: probably my two companion gift pieces a broken heart looks good on you that i gifted to chu, and the sequel piece let's make it worth it that i wrote for lilac. there are things i think are strong and weak in both (and i'm always happy to critique my own work), but i think overall, together, i'm very proud of them.
if you've kudosed, commented, read, or bookmarked anything i wrote this year, thank you! cheers to you, and a happy new year!
this is . . . incredible! the talented, kind @heart-of-the-card drew are for my big bang fic, Love Like Magic.
i love that it's a tarot card of 'the world,' one of my favorite cards because it encompasses so much, and it makes for such fun and dynamic posing and composition. i'm currently obsessed with the background arasha/angela and chanse/trevor duos, damien's incredible pants, ian's little !? of magic, bowie being a good girl, the shading/coloring on tommy's pants, and spencer's whole entire vibe. there's so much more, and PLEASE heap praise on them if you find something you love about it too.
this piece means the world (haha) to me. i've been stuck and frustrated with that piece of writing for a while now, and seeing it like this makes me feel a little kinder towards it again. if you've asked for more writing in that world, it's coming, i swear. i've just been struggling with appreciating that world. thank you to golden, the talented artist, i'm really floored. thank you for helping me like my own writing again!
Hi regarding your last ask idk if you're accepting ian day prompts as early as now but feel free to ignore this if you aren't yet lol sorry but I wanted to share a prompt that idk if it fits your style so feel free to ignore this if not. No worries and no pressure this is just my random ianthony brainrots lol. anyway prompt is superhero!anthony + reporter/journalist!ian. He finds out identity while being saved. childhood bestfriends. has a crush on anthony's hero persona. You can add your own personal details as well as I love your ideas lol sorry if this is also cliche but sometimes we just need a good cliche. Anyway thank you absolutely love your writing
this is SO nice of you!! this is such a good fit for my style, i had a blast. there's probably a really serious, gritty, angsty version of this prompt that would be a lot of fun to write, too, but i love a joke. i'm also a comic book nerd in recovery, so deciding that all superheroes exist in the same world for this one was fun! plus, i got to stuff it full of smosh references too. i had to hold myself back, i could have done a LOT more.
“Only in Bit City,” Ian grumbles to himself while he ducks under a marble counter. He flinches as a few bullets glance off, shedding debris onto the bank floor. Ian reaches a hand inside his messenger bag and presses record on his tape recorder. Old fashioned, yes, but criminals only ever ask for phones and watches nowadays. Ian’s never lost a story since he started carrying this thing around.
“Bit City Bank, November 30th, 3:39 pm,” he mutters as quietly and clearly as he can. “The Woke Mob are holing up the teller window. Shots fired, but no one harmed. They just kinda randomly pull their guns out and shoot all over the place.”
Perhaps that last piece is a little editorial, but he’s allowed a little personal flavor when he could potentially die from sheer trigger-happy negligence.
Ian peeks around the corner, only to quickly duck back when his absolute least favorite police sergeant and his stupid mustache come barreling in, shooting even more wildly than the Woke Mob goons.
“Alriiiiiiight!” Anous shouts, and Ian is already over it. He crawls around the table and starts helping a young couple towards the door as Anous and his troupe make for a standoff with the goons.
It doesn’t stay a standoff for long, though. The moment Ian dives back under the table to try and usher a few other hostages towards the door, all hell breaks loose. Bullets fly everywhere, and Ian just braces in front of a young girl with long blonde hair and a bank lollipop in her hand, distraught. She looks right out of an LA influencer’s vision board, so he assumes she isn’t from around here.
“It’s okay,” he says as evenly as he can. “It’s gonna be okay. I’ve lived here my whole life. There’s always a hero,” he reassures her.
Like on cue, he hears one of the gangsters in a put upon accent shout. “Hey! You! Get outta da rafters and fight like a man!”
“You can’t say that!”
“Oh, shit, you’re right. Come down and fight like a person, however you identify!”
Ian glances over his shoulder and he sees a graceful figure in black drop down to the ground like liquid shadow, then darting around.
Great. It’s the new guy. Ian had been hoping for someone with a little more experience, a little more know-how, but a hero’s a hero, he supposes. At least it’s not the fourteen year old with the katana.
This is the moment, and Ian decides to take the chance. “C’mon,” he says, picking her up and pulling her towards the entrance. It isn’t a long way, and the dark figure seems to be managing alright, taking out a goon or two at a time.
Ian pushes the girl out of the door, just in time to feel a piercing pain right through his shoulder. “Oh, fuck,” he mumbles to himself just before he collapses to the floor.
He wasn’t exactly looking forward to getting shot today. Almost seven years he’s been a reporter, and of course today’s the day he gets shot. On his fucking birthday.
God damn it.
He falls to the floor in a heap, his right-hand clapping over his insistently bleeding shoulder and gritting his teeth. He can vaguely hear commotion behind him, but it’s drowned out by the ringing in his ears. If he bleeds out and the last thing he can hear is Sergeant Anous shouting at the top of his lungs, he’s gonna be pissed.
He isn’t sure how long it takes, but it feels like a while before a man in black with a domino mask is hovering over him. “Oh, shit.”
“Yup,” Ian agrees without unclenching his jaw. “Uh. Would love some medical attention, if you’ve got a sec.”
“Is everyone out?”
“I don’t know! Isn’t that your job?” Ian squeezes his eyes closed.
“I’m new at this!”
Ian breathes deeply in and out through his nose. He peeks an eye open, sweeps the whole place, and it sure does seem like the only people left are the police and the Woke Mob. “Looks clear,” he mumbles.
“Okay, hang on.”
His tape recorder better be okay, Ian thinks as the hero scoops him up and he promptly blacks out.
***
“So,” Ian says, tilting his head to the side as he looks down the alleyway. His shoulder still aches, but if he digs his hands in his pockets, the hunching looks intentional. At the other end of the alley, the figure freezes. “Thanks for bandaging me up. I still need to lodge a complaint with BCPD, since it was an officer who shot me, but I have a few other things to square away first.”
It’s been almost a week and Ian has been going back and forth over what he should do. Turns out, his tape recorder had been fine, and it had caught a little more than he had bargained for, such as his lifelong best friend and crush begging for Ian to “stay with him,” and Ian knows what his name sounds like coming out of Anthony’s mouth.
“What do you need my help with?” Anthony asks.
“I was wondering if you could maybe hang Sergeant Anous up in a web by his ankles. Maybe in just his boxers, if we’re feeling really creative.”
“What? No, I can’t—”
“I know,” Ian says, holding a hand up to cut him off. “I know, that’s the other guy. I was kidding. Bummer, though,” he says, walking slowly towards Anthony, and now he can see it. He can see his very particular build, his careful control, the way he glances around even in that domino mask—it’s pure Anthony.
Some reporter he is.
“Would have been kind of fun to do the upside-down kiss. Oh well. I was wondering if I could get a quote from you. On record.”
“Uh, don’t rob banks?” Ian can see the tension in Anthony’s shoulders as he backs up to the wall behind him, but still, Ian presses forward. He’s going to start skittering if Ian doesn’t stop.
“Fair,” Ian says. “Now, anything you want to say, off the record?”
“Uh… No? Not particularly?”
“How about ‘oh, glad you didn’t die, sorry I haven’t been by this week,’” he offers.
“I don’t—I wouldn’t—I mean. Sorry, Ian, I don’t really checkup once I do the hero thing.”
Ian lifts an eyebrow, a satisfied smirk on his lips. Caught in his own web. Shakespeare couldn’t write it better. Lois Lane… Now she’s a talent. Ian needs to call her this week because damn does he have a Bit City hero scoop. Off the record, of course.
“I don’t think I introduced myself when I was bleeding out.”
Anthony looks petrified, Ian can see it behind the mask. “You didn’t,” Anthony agrees, stalling for time. “But, your ID…”
“Was in my bag. Along with the running tape recorder, and I know you know how those things work because you sold it to me after I complained that robbers always take my phones, you little tech geek.” Ian steps forward and lifts his hands to the corners of the mask. He starts pulling the black fabric away, slow enough that Anthony could run if he wants to.
He stays still. Very tense, but still.
Brown eyes Ian would know in pitch black darkness stare at him as he lowers the mask.
“Hey, Anthony.”
“Hey, Ian.”
“Fight any bad guys today?”
“Uh, nope. Just feeding the detective agency a little intel. There was a food crime down on 69th street last night, thought Detective Miller should know.”
“Nice.”
“Detective Coffee chased me out though. Christ still doesn’t like me, but I’m her Creekside Killer contact.”
“Uh huh.”
“Um. Are you mad at me?”
“A little.”
“I think I can still give that upside down kiss thing a shot. Would that help?”
Ian considers a moment, looking up at Anthony. “What the hell, I already got shot. It’ll give me something to brag about when Peter Parker starts dropping Spider-man pics later this week.”
“That’s not—”
“I know,” Ian says, shaking his head. “You’re the other guy.”
