Cuck

I have a friend named Christine and everything she says is iconic

[shitchristinesays]

Katya: you're not gonna Die

Christine, completely deadpan: I will die soon

[shitchristinesays]

I'm the Fool, Judgement and Death. What do you think about That.

Christine, with fearsome energy, while Katie continues to try to give her a serious Tarot card reading

[shitchristinesays]

The fool! The Fool. I feel like that describes me best...the Fool.

Christine, to herself, while Katie is trying to give her a serious Tarot card reading

[shitchristinesays]

I'm on the side of the angels, but not the baseball team, because they're terrible

Christine

[shitchristinesays]

I like to think that I'm not hypocritical, because I acknowledge my flaws. But I don't have any, I'm perfect, because I'm the first wheel

Christine

[shitchristinesays]

Ewok, ewok...Key lime pie!

Christine

[shitchristinesays]

“I look very whitewashed. I don’t know if that can happen...because I’m white”

—Christine, looking at a picture of herself

[shitchristinesays]

PSA~?

from now on I’m going to schedule posts so that quotes don’t come in infrequent, huge floods. So from now on, there’ll be a new quote every Friday, to infinity.. and beyond. Godspeed.

[shitchristinesays]

I’ve been listing to some K-indie. Korean indie. The songs are in English but I still can’t tell what he’s saying. He has, like, a thick accent or something. I have to look up the lyrics. I just hear… ‘mmmnnnuhhmnnhuhhhuhmnnnmuh!’ Like a little bee in my ear. A GOOD bee! Save the bees.

Christine

[shitchristinesays]

ellie, a vegetarian: “i love eating the rich.” christine: “that’s eating Meat.”

[shitchristinesays]

katya: you know how i imagine you in the future? i see you as—

christine: AN ADVERTISER!

katya: no, a—

christine: A RAPPER!

katya: let me finish!! i see you in an

apartment—

christine: LIVING ALONE.

katya: living alone. with your excellent hair. and you’re a conspiracy theories—a conspiracy theorist.

christine: A CONSPIRACY THEORIES. I DON’T MAKE THE THEORIES. I AM THE THEORIES.

[shitchristinesays]

“What’s a ury? A urinal?”

—Christine

[shitchristinesays]

“I only know two places. Home, and the Fresh Market”

—Christine

[shitchristinesays]

Christine: im not supposed to give discounts to non family members but close enough.

Ellie: aww.

Christine, like a baby donkey: eowwwhhh.

[shitchristinesays]

James: I don’t have a good grasp on money

Christine: Demand a refund, then buy another

[shitchristinesays]

“pew pew”

—Christine, softly punching the air

[shitchristinesays]

“We could play with Stick”

—Christine