Adventures in Godville

Found another hero's diary. Our entries were frighteningly similar... Great minds think alike, I suppose.

[shitmyherosays]

Got a VIP/RIP card from death. It reads: "Since you already know your way around, make yourself comfortable".

Death Log

[shitmyherosays]

I would like to thank my parents, my agent, my guildmates, fellow heroes, and most of all my Goddess. Without their love, support and constant vigilance, I just wouldn't be where I am today. Dead.

Death Log

[shitmyherosays]

Other heroes love it when I draw the letter 'X' on the ground. They swarm around it as soon as I leave, cheering excitedly, with shovels in their hands.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

Tried to picture nothingness, but drew a blank.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

I guess I can't have everything. Where would I put it?

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

I can't sleep, Almighty. Can I please have a glass of water? And could you read me a story? And I need another blanket, because this one is too itchy.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

Ran with scissors. Nearly died.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

Sold everything except my soul. The trader didn't want it, even when I tried to throw it in for free.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

Great One, I remember very little of last night, except partying like there was no tomorrow. Looking back, I'm glad I did, because there wasn't.

Death Log

[shitmyherosays]

How the heck am I writing this, with my body lying several feet away from my head and all...

Death Log

[shitmyherosays]

Glued a sword handle to a large rock, then sat back giggling as I had hours of fun watching hero after hero waste their time pulling on it.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

My brain fell out again. Gosh, it's hard to keep an open mind.

Death Log

[shitmyherosays]

'Watch where you tread!' the monster said. It hit my head; I may have bled. I turned and fled. My face is red, but I'm not dead.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

Heard some other heroes talking about getting stuck in walls and skipping milestones. I'm not too bothered. I've got 99 problems but a glitch ain't one.

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

Umm... What was I writing again?

Hero’s Diary

[shitmyherosays]

The Possessed Exorcist challenged me to use double negatives. I couldn't not do it. Then I didn't not kill it. Now I won't not take this loot.

Hero’s Monster Log

[shitmyherosays]

Where's page 404 of my diary? I can't find it.

Hero’s Diary