A Plural Journal

[snailsand]

made a friend design :)

i used my whole brain for this one ... very rare.....

[tomotakodachi]

slowly getting the hang of this again!

you can get this FRIEND here! FOR FREE!

[vio-marks]

let's watch our creatures running round and round

[shoal-and-murmuration]

One of our newly-noticed alters looks suspiciously like another one of our alters, so there's probably a relation

(It's not my kid.)

Then why does it look like you????

[shoal-and-murmuration]

YO WATCH ASMR AND GO TO SLEEP

[shoal-and-murmuration]

Still rhe writer guy mostly. Fuck what the fuck did I choose for my name.

[shoal-and-murmuration]

Seriously I should make a name for myself. I show up to do journal entries most of the time. Herring is good, like Red Herring in writing I guess. Chekov is too grand. Um. (Scratch) If I'm associated with TADC I'll fucking die. (Yeah but it's pencil related. Um. What about being related to the white pen of hope?)

Still too... big. I just say things. I don't make a new future. I look through the Sparknotes of our life and jot shit down. And sometimes just say things on social media in general.

(Ink) I CAN'T BE INK SANS MAN. (Harvey.) Why? (I dunno. Throwing names out. Written.) Doesn't feel like me. (Well what are you like?)

Well. I'm bumbling. I feel like an archivist. I feel calm. I both like and want to be alone. Only when I'm alone do I feel comfortable like... reflecting. You know? No performing or shit. I don't know.

(And what do you want to be?)

Well. I want to be happy? I want to be safe. I... i sort of hope one day we will have our nice little slot in history. That would he good. Nothing big, just having our name known in a niche concept or area of study, like in plurality or the behavior of a specific animal, or art.

(Record, maybe?)

I guess... I don't know. Iloquy, maybe. I like that. I'm glad you put up with me.

(A thumbs-up.)

we'll see how long it lasts. :/

[shoal-and-murmuration]

Still rhe writer guy mostly. Fuck what the fuck did I choose for my name.

[shoal-and-murmuration]

I didn't realize just how badly benign phonecalls can affects me until today. My girlfriend notice my body was acting off while we were on a call with our friend. Like, uneven breathing, sounding strained, body a bit type.

(History of hours-long calls) (not feeling seen or heard) (being forced to sit in silence) (the impulse to perform) (not feeling safe with majority of people) (had training for replacing behaviors I used to convey disinterest and a desire for things to end with "active listening") (associating phone calls with fear)

Well okay man?

[shoal-and-murmuration]

What else did we do. Uh. Oh right we had to speak with an older woman. Usually I'm fine with older women but this was all of a sudden and I had just woken up. (Don't know who I am)

And uh... I know someone came out to speak to a cleaning lady we enjoy the company of I think that was Lydia (Yeah, partially me at least)

Um and then.. we sent emails. Because of our research. And we (someone in here at least) tend to dread doing any kind of work from time to time? Which is weird, because it's not really their problem when the body actually does work and tasks. I just pop up and do the shit, and I feel relatively okay handling it. Don't know who I am either. Eh... yeah not sure. Someone "Boring"

Then we had a meeting, which I also did. Talked with a guy that knows the local flora. And I came back and spent time with the cat we're watching over until his companion comes back. Someone in here likes animals and acts very friendly with them. Could be Wikki? (Nah, not me.) Well then, someone who likes animals. She(?) also came out to greet and play with him this morning. Maybe she'll be Echidna. (After looking through wikipedia I'll go with Matago for a while)

[criminal-fish]

We haD NOTHING BUT WATERMELON FOR DINNER?!

Yeah :]

What the fuck. (I miss hotdogs.)

[shoal-and-murmuration]

thAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THERE????

Sorgy. (Apathetically, in the way that says that nothing will be done about the reblog of "let's do the fork in the garbage disposal")

[beggars-opera]

Not to be that person, but if you remember this, how's that newfound back pain going for ya babe

[vocabulary-altering-posts]

PHRASE ADDED!

LET'S DO THE FORK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL

LET'S DO THE FORK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL

DING-DING-DING DING-DING DING DING-DING DING DING-DING-DING DING-DING DING DING-DING DING DING-DING-DING DING-DING DING DING-DING DING DING-DING-DING DING-DING DING DING-DING DING

[shoal-and-murmuration]

What if I wasn't made to last after I got away from my mother, Sc. Maybe I'm not meant to leave her and the life she carefully set up for me without slowly, painfully, decaying over months and years. What if I just deteriorate when I'm away from all the painful stuff I was trained to live in.

[shoal-and-murmuration]

I don't think it matters much how I feel. Aren't I already lucky for being alive? Shouldn't I be grateful to be in Heaven?

(There's something to be said about being based off of someone who knows that there's a prophecy that will fulfil itself, and that to a higher power, multiple higher powers, you aren't real.)

And now I'm here. Helping. I'm doing an okay job at serving, it's what I'm meant to do. (Someone feels bad for you) (someone else sees some kind of reflection) (someone is bitter) (someome wants you to change) (someone is keeping others from doing anything about it (lessons are best learnt first-hand))

[shoal-and-murmuration]

Uh we did stuff today. (Emails, a meeting with someone for research (about plants), another meeting as a check-in.)

I feel a bit spaced out when I write this stuff, like I'm zooming through sparknotes. I vaguely remember typing stuff earlier. Maybe Melvile (can't tell if that's how I spell my name)? (No) (someone else) (someone scared?)

Well guess I'm scared about being caught writing stuff. But like, that's normal (no)(not fully)(yeah but not heart-pounding scared at the idea of someone seeing you writing and disapproving.)

... Okay man. (Writer?) I guess I do that. I like... wanna have excitement a passion? Maybe I did some roleplaying stuff.

I sort of don't want to identify myself. Not with a full name right now... what if I'm someone else in here with a different coat of paint. (Maybe) (Maybe not.)

Writer? Written? Lowercase? (Because you hide (on the down-low)) (Letters like with writing (good one. -_-)). Um. Low-case. Lucas, no. Low-case is fine I guess?

[shoal-and-murmuration]

Woke up and what tje hell did we do. (Got high again) (stayed up late technically) (enjoyed time with our gf)

Okay why are we doing this (having an online journal). (Uhhhhh I dunno. /reference (to a stupid video.) (Incentive to write. We need to write.) (This is a fun little thing people can find as skme sort kf secret)

[shoal-and-murmuration]

OH HOLY FUCK GF IS STILL IN HERE. Had the jumpscare of my fucking life when I saw her foot poking out of her nest. Oh my godddddd....... Still don't know who I am but that's a pleasant surprise.

I thought she left? I was probably wrong (remembering when she got up to use the restroom and thought she was leaving) (oh my god we were high :)) (shut up)

I think she left, to go to her dorm, but then came back for some reason... (You know this is just like one of those point-n-click mystery adventures where tje protag wakes up to a bunch of studf and needs to figyre out what the hell's going on.)

I should get stuff done while I'm here. Emails.

[shoal-and-murmuration]

Woke up and what tje hell did we do. (Got high again) (stayed up late technically) (enjoyed time with our gf)

Okay why are we doing this (having an online journal). (Uhhhhh I dunno. /reference (to a stupid video.) (Incentive to write. We need to write.) (This is a fun little thing people can find as skme sort kf secret)