Fidgetopia

Writings born of Espresso & Punk Rock Living

[sillyfidget]

That special moment in a woman's life when she finally admits defeat and Googles fan art.

[sillyfidget]

I don’t always politics, but when I do I drink Dos Equis.

[awkward-elevator]

[sillyfidget]

Sometimes I just have to reblog this.

[gifbro]

[4gifs]

“Thanks for the fish!” [video] 

[sillyfidget]

Ha ha, look you guys, it's America taking away my hard-earned cash because I'm low income and my vote doesn't matter and I had the gall to try to achieve something through hard work and luck alone, ha ha ha HA HA HA HA oh man.

[sillyfidget]

With 7 billion people in the world right now and an estimated 107 billion to have ever lived, it's hard to justify a belief that you may have had a past life as a human being who lived in a known ancient society (a Druid, a Pharaoh, a Viking) unless you concede that a lot of us are having our second go-round in a bit of a rush. Like maybe we cut in line or something. ... Seems kinda rude.

[beautilation]

The Freaky Ass Furniture of Catherine The Great

This is Catherine The Great. She was a legendary Empress of Russia and ruled longer than any other leader, and she did a damn good job by all accounts. People loved her, she worked hard, she was smart, and she was also one of the proudest motherfucking freaks in HISTORY. She proved to the world that just because you look a little like Lady John Lithgow does not mean you are undesirable, and just because you’re royalty does not mean you can’t be a horny goddess of filth.

There’s this rumor that Catherine’s biggest conquest was a literal goddamn horse, but historians believe that it’s just a sick rumor that some hating ass bitches made up because they were intimidated that a woman could not only be in charge of a country but of her own sexual predilections. HMM, THANK GOD TIMES HAVE CHANGED???

Anyway, Catherine used her money to finance this fuck pad room in her castle that was an homage to doin’ the nasty. Catherine’s Pinterest board must have looked like a fucking PornHub screenshot because this is what that beautiful proud slut decorated her lair with:

A chair that is so classically beautiful and…oh my damn…what in the hell..

IS THAT CHAIR SUCKING A DAMN DICK?

THAT IS THE DEVIL AND HE IS EATING A PUSSY LIKE HELLFIRE’S GONNA SHOOT OUT OF IT

YOU NOT A BAD BITCH UNLESS YOUR OFFICE CHAIR HAS A PANTALOON-LESS VULVA AIRING ITSELF OUT ON IT. 

THERE ARE GIANT WANGS GROWING OUT OF GIANT CHI-CHIS HOLDING UP A CORNUCOPIA OF FINELY-CRAFTED, CLASSICAL ASS, BAROQUE ASS, ROCOCO ASS GENITALS, WITH THEIR TORRENTIAL EJACULATIONS. HOW THE FUCK YOU GONNA GO TO IKEA AFTER THIS SHIT? 

I wish there were more pictures of the original pieces, but in the 50′s some uptight German Army dipshits destroyed her collection because it gave them shameful boners or something. An artist has recreated her utilitarian odes to fuck, but it is truly sad that we cultured skanks can never appreciate such high art in its original glory. Damn, Cathy. Respect.

[sillyfidget]

I'd like to add that right at the seat is a great butt with a dick going, like, right in. Bless you, Catharine the Great.

[marifelovesdanzo]

[gosailthesea]

“maybe if I make a super cool mad face I’ll look even more badass!!”

[sillyfidget]

His mom wanted him to smile, but she wanted a lot of things for his senior portrait that she didn’t get.

[sillyfidget]

Its 2016 man.  You can just find a native speaker to proofread your porn ads for $5 instead of publishing this.  Sing Up Now.

[attackgoose]

Happy Whale Day

[gosailthesea]

god bless

[borncolourblind]

This was such a beautiful moment in time.

[24cylinders]

OH MY GOD HOW IS THIS STILL A THING PEOPLE REMEMBER I DONT EVSICHJAKDJD

[attackgoose]

You’re damn right it’s still a thing. I will never let this die. #nevar4get

[sillyfidget]

You guys, on Whale Day’s tenth anniversary, let’s all remaining thirty of us who remember it get together for a seafood lunch.

[borncolourblind]

You  guys, I made our reservations.

[attackgoose]

This is the most beautiful thing in the L’Arc fandom.

[sillyfidget]

Sure, we all remember whales on Whale Day, but are you guys remembering to keep the spirit of the whales in your hearts ALL YEAR LONG?

[sillyfidget]

DID YOU GUYS KNOW ABOUT THIS:

https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/world-whale-day/

IT IS A REAL THING.

[midnight-on-dathomir-deactivate]

BREAKING NEWS! Malice Mizer band leader Mana announces that the legendary visual kei band will end their 15-year hiatus and resume activities mid-2016. Click here for official video comment!

[sillyfidget]

I just wanna reblog this again because I recently hung out at @socially-awkward-platypus ‘s house and brought up how this was a fabulous new take on an internet classic and it turned out THE ORIGINATOR OF THIS POST WAS SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME.  God bless you, miss. <3

[sillyfidget]

Do yourself a favor and watch this gif while listening to The Dramatics classic hit.

[weloveshortvideos]

[sillyfidget]

Umbrella Corporation fails to address a security breach yet again.

[sachiko1001]

[sillyfidget]

I’ve had it up to HERE with these fake-ass poser gamer chicks.

[weloveshortvideos]

[fuckyeahmercury]

I Want To Break Free – 1984

[midnight-on-dathomir-deactivate]

BREAKING NEWS! Malice Mizer band leader Mana announces that the legendary visual kei band will end their 15-year hiatus and resume activities mid-2016. Click here for official video comment!

[awesome-picz]

Cats Who Immediately Regretted Their Poor Life Choices.