simonharms

Inconsistent ramblings about my experiences in Indonesia and my love of languages.

[simonharms]

Why didn't I make connections? -I've been back in the United States for getting close to seven years. I lived overseas for six years as a te

Latest insight from Simon up ahead, I've been back in the States forever and yet I do not make connections here. Here is my shallow-yet-deep exploration of what's going on.

[simonharms]

Indonesia Six Years Later: My Reflection - Beautiful Nusantara

I am an American who spent most of my teenage years in the beautiful country that is Indonesia, I belong to an invisible group of people, me

Started moving some of my blog over to Wordpress but I will still be active here just with links leading to my off-platform site. Please check it out!

[simonharms]

your story is so interesting! I want to visit Manado and Salatiga someday. it's too bad that as an Indonesian myself I rarely go to other cities. I've only been to Bandung, Yogyakarta, Semarang, Malang, Surabaya, and Bali

I've been to all of those cities, I really enjoy Bandung and Yogyakarta as well. You know, life in Salatiga comes with the absence of many big brands so usually if I want to go to the mall or go do something fun I would usually pick Yogyakarta, but usually we'd go to Semarang because it is a little bit closer. Bandung, I unfortunately only got to go to once, same with Malang and Surabaya. Bali is beautiful and there's a lot of cool stuff but the amount of tourists can be ridiculous, it can really detract from the splendor and beauty of the temples and the beaches that there's some shirtless dude from Australia walking around it all with a beer belly that fascinates medical professionals by size.

[simonharms]

A Bit of My Background With Indonesia

When I was 10 years old, my dad was looking for an international opportunity in his organization. My mom had originally consistently said no to going overseas, but she agreed this time. Surprisingly, this was not to go to Indonesia, our family initially would be going to Madagascar, but at some point it was switched to Indonesia. My parents went before we did as a family (I also have a sister), going to Manado, a city in North Sulawesi, one of the most northern reaching islands in the archipelago. Living in Indonesia was wild and exciting and at other times calm and boring. We spent the first nine months in Salatiga, a completely different city on a completely different island, Java, known locally as Jawa.

My first thought when we got off the plane was that the whole air felt heavy and hot. We walked down the stairs of the plane and I looked around feeling like I was on a different world. I thought Indonesia would look like the Asia I saw in movies but it was different. The mountains had their own song to them as the wind blew threw them. Before any person spoke to me in Indonesia, the nature spoke to me. The land was so green as we flew over, looking clean from the plane but as you get closer you realize the jungle is incredibly thick. I had never really seen mountains or the jungle before, the exception being when I visited Thailand the year before. The next sensation was the adhan from the masjids which I started to realize were every where. At first the volume felt like the loudest thing I ever heard but over my time there, it would become like I didn't hear them anymore.

I had very little contact with people outside of school in Salatiga, mostly a few neighbors who I would play soccer with or badminton outside our houses and an elderly neighbor who would fill me with wonder that he was older than the country he lived in and didn't really speak Indonesian, the standardized variety of Malay spoken nearly nationally at some level. My parents were at a school there for those nine months, learning Indonesian.

After nine months, we packed all our things in a shipping container and brought our things to Manado. We arrived a month before our belongings, and my mom, sister and I left for Australia while my dad was at our house in Manado so we could visit my grandma who was too afraid of malaria and dengue to come to Manado. Before me and my sister enrolled in school, I spent a lot of time outside. There were some students from Papua that built a car port outside our house (our 'house' was an abandoned guest house/hotel), and they spoke English and would tell me little things about the area and play games with me when they took their breaks. I would enjoy building fires and making things out of wood and other things I would find and we had a beautiful coconut tree. The neighbors dogs would also come visit us because we would give them snacks.

When I wasn't in school I would spend a lot of time at the nearby mission campus which was operated mostly by locals, but many of them spoke English, and one of the students there would come by our house a few times a week with picture boards and would tell me what all the things in the pictures were in Indonesian and Manadonese (Bahasa Manado or Malay Manado). This was my first real taste of language and while in Manado I felt my first strange connection with the country I was in. In our kampung (neighborhood or village), there was quite a few traditional Minahasa type houses, and once when asking about Minahasans, I was told the story of Manado Tua, a small volcanic island off the coast of Manado where the Minahasans allegedly lived before coming to Manado. From what I remember the story goes something like this, originally after the voyage of the Minahasans, the people decided to set up a settlement on Manado Tua and stayed there for many years until one day the ground starting shaking and the people took that as an omen that it was time to leave, and later on Manado Tua would end up erupting and the island would destroy itself in the eruption (it is still destroyed today if you find a picture of it, being that it is pretty much a volcano that goes directly into the ocean with no land flat enough to settle and is surrounded by sea urchins).

We left Mando after being there for a year and a half, and it was bittersweet to leave, on one end, there had been a long drought and often we had to buy water or collect it from a river for basic things or conserve water by reducing showers or shower time and on the other hand I left many of my friends when I left and all our dogs (we had close to two dozen when we left because our dog Koko had babies twice). After leaving Manado, we arrived in Salatiga again, and it was fun seeing my classmates from the sixth grade again as many of them still were at the same school, just this time we would go into 9th grade together. I spent the first six months there on a long holiday because for the last semester of school I was in Manado, I had finished two semesters of virtual school, so I was ahead. It took over a year for me to have any real connection with people outside of school. If you're an expat that has lived in Salatiga, you know the bubble effect. The bubble effect is that you live in Indonesia but almost everything you do is either located centrally in or around the school and almost all your time is spent there due to it being a small English and Korean speaking exclave within Indonesia.

My first time feeling that same strange connection feeling was visiting the various candi in Central Java (the area not the province because quite a few of the best preserved ones are in Yogyakarta). Candi are temples or temple complexes from Pre-Islamic Java, the most notable ones being Prambanan, Borobudor and Gedong Songo. When you go there and hear the gamelan, you can almost imagine how it was hundreds of years ago when the candi were still in common use. Ever since then I was hooked on Indonesian history and would often dream that I was an ancient mariner of the Majapahit or Srivijaya Empire. While in Salatiga, I became mostly fluent in Indonesian (and also standard Malay), but mostly spoken with a bit of an accent (mixed Javanese and American accent that is), and of course, I also learned quite a bit of Javanese. Sometimes while traveling or talking to someone from another area, I would pick up a bit of their language too and would often compare the languages I heard to ones I knew.

I loved living in Indonesia and I hope to someday be able to live there again, all in all I spent 6 years of my teenage years there and I really pray to go home soon. Semoga senang semuanya dan terima kasih buat bagi negaramu sama aku. <3

[simonharms]

'melihatkan' is rather archaic.... i personally would say 'memperlihatkan'

Yeah I still hear both quite a bit to be honest

[simonharms]

Me- -Kan Verbs in Indonesian

Happy weekend guys! Today is the next post in the Indonesian Affixes series where we go over how different affixes and affix combinations effect your favorite Indonesian words! Today we will cover how to use Me- -Kan Verbs. Me- -Kan verbs are a unfortunately not necessarily directly understandable by just identifying the root word and the affix but there are some patterns that can help you decide when to use one. I'd recommend reading this post I made before about me- verbs first.

Patterns

Causative Pattern - used when the verb will cause action in someone else.

Benefactive Pattern - used when the subject is doing something for someone else.

Transitive Pattern - used to increase the transitiveness of a verb.

Causative Pattern

The causative pattern is used when the verb will cause action in someone else. The action is not always the same (I think it might not ever be the same but someone can comment and prove me wrong) but it is similar or related. One example is mengajarkan (me + ajar + kan) which is to teach (for the sake of someone else to learn). It is, of course, very similar to mengajar which is teaching without specifying who is being taught. Another example would be membacakan, which means to read something to someone, and, membaca can also be used which is to read something (to yourself). Our last example for the causative pattern will be mengirimkan, which is to send something to someone else. Mengirim (without the -kan) can be used without having to specify a sender (explicitly or via context).

Benefactive Pattern

The benefactive pattern indicates an action is being done for someone. Here are some examples: memasakkan (to cook for someone), menuliskan (to write for someone), membuatkan (to make for someone).

Transitive Pattern

The transitive pattern adds some extra transitiveness to a word, and I would say this is the most difficult of the two patterns to understand when you see a word and it doesn't look like it is causative or benefactive. For these examples I am going to go more in depth:

Melihatkan, meaning 'to show,' the root word, lihat, means 'look' or 'see,' but you don't really look or see for someone nor do you look or see to someone. So this meaning comes from you are making someone else see something, and changing the transitiveness of the word results in melihatkan.

Mendengarkan, means 'to listen,' but the root word, dengar, means 'to hear.' The result is that mendengarkan is listening, because you are hearing for the sake of someone else. Since the word changes in meaning subtly, it indicates the transitive pattern.

Oddities about Verbs Ending in -Kan without Me-

I also noticed while writing this that usually when the me- -kan verb has followed an auxilary verb, it does not keep the me-. For example: Tolong buangkan sampah ini. Please throw this trash away. Aku mau bacakan cerita buat adikku sebelum tidur. I want to read a story for my little sibling before bed.

[simonharms]

Indonesian Affixes Series: Me-

Hey guys, this is going to be the first in my series on affixes in Indonesian. Indonesian is an agglutinative language, which means that often new words are created by adding affixes to root words to create new meanings for the root word. Today we will cover the me+verb formula, which changes the focus of the sentence to the verb (unless the word is a me-kan word in which the meaning is different).

We're going to go through each of the examples one by one so you can see how me- changes and how me- changes the root word, because there is a certain level of harmony required.

Melihat : Me + lihat = Melihat. Which is a very common word meaning to see. Saya melihatnya di kerja. "I see him at work."

Membaca : Me + Baca = Membaca, meaning 'to read.' Saya suka membaca Kakawin Sutasoma. "I like to read the epic poem Sutasoma."

Memilih : Me + Pilih = Memilih, meaning 'to choose.' Roots starting with 'P' become 'M' after me-. Dia memilih bekerja hari ini biar libur empat hari langsung. "He chose to work today so he could have four days off in a row."

Menutup : Me + Tutup = Menutup, meaning 'to close.' Roots starting with 'T' become 'N' after me-. Ratri lupa menutup jendela sebelum tidur lalu dia masuk angin. "Ratri forgot to close the window before bed and caught a cold."

Menjual : Me + Jual = Menjual, meaning 'to sell.' Dia harus menjual sepeda motornya setelah dia hilang semua uangnya karena ditipu. "He had to sell his motorcycle after losing all his money because he was scammed."

Mengajar : Me + Ajar = Mengajar, meaning 'to teach.' In front of all vowels me- becomes meng-. Dia mengajar adikmu bahasa Spanyol. "He teaches your little sister Spanish."

Mengetik : Me + Ketik = Mengetik. meaning 'to type.' Roots beginning with 'K' loose the 'K' when meng- is added. Pak Gusti sering mengetik dokumen buat kepala pemerintah. "Mr. Gusti often types documents for the head of the government."

Menggambar : Me + Gambar = Menggambar, meaning 'to draw.' Words beginning with 'G' will retain their 'G' when meng- is added but the 'G' will follow the pronunciation pattern of "NGG" meaning the "NG" is nasalized. Kalau anda pergi ke Bali, bisa lihat artisnya menggambar pulaunya seperti yang ada di sejarah. "If you visit Bali, you can see the artisted draw the island like it was in history."

Menyukai : Me + Suka + I = Menyukai, meaning 'to like.' This example is a little bit more complicated than the others but I wanted to include it since it is probably the most commonly used meny- word possible, I'm not sure why you can't say menyukai without the 'I' at the end of the word but you can't, and in another post or a reply or something I can explain what 'I' does to verbs as well. All roots beginning with 'S' will have the 'S' dropped and the prefix me- becomes meny-. Saya sangat menyukai makanan tradisional Indonesia. "I really like traditional Indonesian food."

Menyebut : Me + Sebut = Menyebut, meaning 'to mention.' I wanted to include this example with the other 'S' example because I wanted one without the 'I' suffix at the end. Guru itu sering menyebut contoh-contoh dari kehidupan sehari-hari. "That teacher often mentions examples from daily life."

It most likely won't take too much time to remember which me- form to use with which verb, so don't be discouraged if this seems like a lot of information at once. I've noticed most learners figure it out in a week and usually voiced and unvoiced consonants share the same me- form. (B and P, D and T, G and K) and usually the unvoiced one is the rule breaker.

Selamat belajar semuanya!

[simonharms]

one of my favorite indonesian phrases is "melanglang buana", it means "traveling around the world"! but there are some phrases that sound even sillier: "pontang-panting", "lintang pukang" 😂 my 3yo cousin thought it was hilarious

Lintang pukang is pretty great too (”head over heels” but literally ‘crotch star’). I’ve never heard pontang-panting before, does it mean something along the lines of “done in a hurried, confused manner?” Thanks for adding some phrases!

[simonharms]

Some of My Favorite Indonesian Phrases

Here are some interesting Indonesian phrases and idioms. They might not all be commonly used, but they offer a fascinating peek into the language and culture. Enjoy exploring these unique expressions!

Cuci Mata - literally "to wash eyes" but it means "to window shop." You'll hear this quite a bit, especially if someone says they want to go to the mall.

Surga ada di bawah telapak kaki ibu - "Heaven is on the bottom of your mothers feet", when you hear the phrase, it means "You should treat your mom well because she gives you the best in life (and the after life)."

Buaya - "Crocodile", a player or womanizer. This usage is less common in more recent years, and it's more likely to mean crocodile if you hear it unless it is used to describe a person.

Bersilat Lidah - "to tongue fight" meaning 'argue'. A more standard way to say 'argue' is membantah or debat (from English 'debate').

Air putih - literally meaning "white water" but it's just mineral water. A polite way to ask for water at a restaurant is "Saya minta air putih."

Bule and londok - if you're noticeably a foreigner don't be surprised if you hear the word bule, it is a common word (especially for foreigners with white skin). There are a lot of theories where the word came from and what it originally meant but there isn't a whole lot of certainty, one of the two theories I've heard is that it comes from the word for the Dutch, belanda, and went through some sound changes over time. The other one I've heard is that it comes from an older word or phrase meaning "pig's skin," since the skin of a pig is very pale and white. Londok or londo comes from the word belanda and is an older term than bule but they mean the same thing. Some foreigners in Indonesia dislike being called bule, as sometimes it seems like it has a negative connotation depending on the usage.

[simonharms]

Places to visit in Indonesia

1. Yogyakarta

Yogyakarta, a beautiful city and province south of Central Java, is rich with cultural and historical attractions. Highlights include the magnificent Borobudur and Prambanan temples, showcasing ancient Buddhist and Hindu architecture. The Kraton, the royal palace of the Sultan, offers cultural experiences and vibrant night food stalls. Visitors can also explore Taman Sari, or "the Water Castle," to admire its historic Javanese architecture.

2. Ubud

Ubud, the cultural heart of Bali, offers a journey back in time to a Hindu and Buddhist-dominated Indonesia. The area is home to numerous temples and breathtaking landscapes. Visitors can also explore the famous Monkey Forest Sanctuary, but be sure to follow the guidelines when interacting with the monkeys. Ubud's rich cultural heritage and stunning sights make it a must-visit destination.

3. Raja Ampat

Raja Ampat, located in West Papua, is renowned for its rich marine biodiversity and stunning coral reefs, making it a paradise for divers and snorkelers. Beyond its underwater beauty, the archipelago offers pristine beaches, lush jungles, and unique cultural experiences with Papuans. It's a must-visit destination for nature and adventure enthusiasts.

4. Bunaken

Bunaken, a small island off the coast of Manado in North Sulawesi, offers some of the best snorkeling and diving in Indonesia, and possibly the world. Its well-preserved reef is a testament to the island's commitment to marine conservation. Visitors can also experience traditional Indonesian village life (cara hidup desa) and enjoy numerous spots to savor delicious, fresh fish.

5. Bandung

Bandung, often referred to as the Paris of Java, lives up to its charming nickname with its beautiful landscapes and pleasant climate. Once the capital of the Dutch East Indies, the city boasts a rich historical heritage. Visitors can enjoy a vibrant culinary scene, excellent shopping, and numerous historical sites, making Bandung a must-visit destination.

6. Labuan Bajo

Labuan Bajo, located on the western tip of Flores Island, is the gateway to the stunning Komodo National Park. Known for its crystal-clear waters, vibrant coral reefs, and diverse marine life, it's a haven for divers and snorkelers. The area also offers breathtaking landscapes, with picturesque islands, lush hills, and the famous Komodo dragons. Labuan Bajo is a perfect destination for those seeking adventure and natural beauty.

7. Torajaland

Torajaland, located in the highlands of South Sulawesi, is renowned for its unique culture and stunning landscapes. Visitors can explore traditional Torajan villages, famous for their distinctive boat-shaped houses and elaborate funeral rites. The region's lush mountains and terraced rice fields offer breathtaking views. Torajaland provides a fascinating glimpse into a rich cultural heritage and traditional way of life.

8. Lombok

Lombok, an island east of Bali, is known for its pristine beaches, vibrant marine life, and lush landscapes. The island offers stunning spots for surfing, snorkeling, and diving, including the famous Gili Islands. Visitors can hike Mount Rinjani, an active volcano with a scenic crater lake, or relax on serene beaches like Tanjung Aan. Lombok's rich culture and natural beauty make it a perfect destination for adventure and relaxation.

9. Kawah Ijen

Kawah Ijen, located in East Java, is famous for its striking turquoise crater lake and mesmerizing blue flames caused by sulfuric gases. Adventurous visitors can hike up the volcano to witness these unique natural phenomena and see miners carrying sulfur from the crater. The breathtaking sunrise views from the summit make the challenging trek worthwhile, offering an unforgettable experience in one of Indonesia's most unique landscapes.

10. Lake Toba

Lake Toba, located in North Sumatra, is the world's largest volcanic lake, created by a massive ancient eruption. This serene destination offers stunning landscapes and a peaceful atmosphere, perfect for relaxation and exploration. Visitors can discover Samosir Island, situated in the middle of the lake, which is rich in Batak culture and history. With its breathtaking views and unique cultural experiences, Lake Toba is a must-visit destination in Indonesia.

[simonharms]

i really like your pronouns post! you explained it pretty well :) when i talk with people my age (who are not from jakarta) i don't use 'gue' and 'lo' because it's unusual in other cities, so i use 'aku' and 'kamu' when i'm talking with them

Yeah I also never use 'gue' and 'lo', I grew up in Central Java and Manado. In Salatiga, you'd be more likely to hear 'aku' and 'kamu' and in Manado, you'd be more likely to hear bahasa Manado. Selam kenal!

[simonharms]

Common Mistakes Indonesian Learners Make

Hey guys! Today I have some common mistakes you can make while learning Indonesian and how to avoid them!

Using the Wrong Not

Often I hear a lot of new learners using the wrong word for not. In Indonesian there are two, the most common by far is tidak. Tidak is used when you are negating a verb.

Ex. Saya tidak suka daging sapi. - I don't like beef.

Tidak is usually best translated as not, don't or something similar. But if you want to use it with something other than a verb, you could be about to make a common mistake a lot of learners make. Introduce bukan, the other word that means "not." Here's a sentence that uses bukan properly.

Ex. Dia makan sate ayam bukan kambing. - He eats chicken satay not goat satay.

Bukan only appears in front of nouns and yang. Here's an example with yang.

Ex. Dia sering pergi ke tempat sibuk bukan yang berisik. - He often goes to busy places not loud ones.

To avoid this rule, before you say tidak if it is in front of a verb or a adjective, if so go ahead, but if it is in front of a noun or an adjective turned noun, use bukan.

Using the Wrong Question Words

Indonesian words for asking questions are as follows.

Apa - What

Mengapa/Kenapa - Why

Siapa - Who

Kapan - When

Bagaimana - How

Dimana - Where

Mana - Which

The question words don't match up one to one though with the English translation I gave you, for instance, when asking a question to identify someone, you should use siapa even if in English we would use "what."

Ex. Siapa namanya? - What's your name?

Ex. Siapa yang makan semua manteganya? - Who ate all the butter?

Bagaimana means how but if you want to ask for instructions on how to do something you should say apa caranya.

Ex. Apa caranya masak nasi padang? - How to cook Nasi Padang?

Bagaimana is usually used more like this:

Ex. Bagaimana dia bisa dapat nilai itu? - How could he receive that score?

Mixing Formal and Informal Pronouns

I also often hear new learners mix words like aku and anda, or saya and kamu. If you use anda in a sentence, you can't use aku you need to use saya and if you use kamu in a sentence, you have to use aku.

Missing Prepositions or Using the Wrong One

Sometimes new learns will be missing a requires preposition, and quite a few Indonesian verbs require a preposition.

Ex. Aku sayang sama kamu. - I love you

Do not say aku sayang kamu. It isn't very natural for an Indonesian speaker to hear.

Other verbs that often require a preposition include the following:

Rindu (dengan) - miss

Cinta (dengan) - love (not a commonly used word though)

Tertarik (sama/pada) - Interested in

Percaya (kepada/pada) - Believe in

Peduli (pada/sama) - Cares about

[simonharms]

Indonesian Pronouns

Indonesian has a few more pronouns than may be familiar in English, here is a list with explanations:

Formal/Polite

Kita and kami are used differently, when you are including the person you're talking to. Kita includes the person you are talking to, kind of like saying "you and I" (but can include others too). Kami is the pronoun used when you're not including the speaker, kind of like "Me and him/her."

Familiar

The familiar pronouns are almost exactly the same, but there are some differences to note. All of pronouns can still be polite but may require a relationship with your audience that is more developed (aka you are more familiar with your audience) than you can use with the formal/polite pronouns. In some areas, kami may not be used and instead it may be more popular to use kita for both circumstances.

Informal

At this point the pronouns are just slang and you have to be careful that you are at a familiar enough relationship to use these words although in cities like Jakarta it may be acceptable to use these words without worrying about relationship. Lu and lo are interchangeable and so is gue and gua.

[simonharms]

native indonesian speaker here! i've never heard indonesians use "mengata" in daily conversations, most people (including me) say "bilang" instead...

I used "mengata" more as an example that "kata" is a noun but will get used like a verb. It was just an example to show that Indonesian parts of speech are very flexible!

[simonharms]

Indonesian Word Classes

For all my language nerds out there, the agglutinative and not agglutinative structure of Indonesian words is very flexible.

Some examples:

Kata: Word Aku tahu kata itu. - I know that word. Berkata: Say Aku sudah berkata "diamlah!" - I already said "be quiet!" Mengata: Saying Aku mengata "boleh!" - I am saying (you) may! Perkataan: Thing that is said Mereka bahas perkataannya guru. - They discuss the teacher's words.

Makan: Eat Aku makan banyak nanas. - I eat a lot of pineapples. Makanan: Food Aku suka makananmu. - I like your food. Memakan: Take (as in medecine) Dia memakan ibuprofen karena pusing. - He takes ibuprofen because he has a headache. Makankan: Feed Aku makankannya susu. - I feed him milk. Dimakan: Eaten (passive) Kueh sering dimakan. - Cakes are often eaten.

Some of these words follow their agglutinative structure more than others. Technically kata is a noun but it gets used like a verb a lot.

Dia kata "jangan!" - He said "do not!"

That is one of the biggest differences between Standard Malay/Indonesian and spoken Colloquial Indonesian, often the word will not be converted to the correct type of word. Some words like makan must always be converted though.

One more example:

Arti: Meaning (noun) Artinya "dia tidak menarik berdansa." - The meaning is "she doesn't want to dance." Berarti: Means (verb) "Parati" berarti "untuk kamu" dalam bahasa spanyol. - "Parati" means "for you" in Spanish.

Like kata, arti often ends up being used as a verb even though it is a noun.

"Podo podo yo" arti "sama sama" dalam bahasa jawa. - "Podo podo yo" means "same to you" in Javanese.

[simonharms]

TCK Experiences

Physically I look a lot like everyone else around me, nothing seemingly strange or exotic about me, but under the surface I feel detached from those around me, not sharing nearly as much in common as those around me. These feelings are normal for TCKs (Third Culture Kids) and at this point I am really a Third Culture Adult. I spent a good portion of my childhood overseas in Indonesia, was incredibly immersed in the culture, but at the age of 17 I moved back to my home country. It didn't take long for me to realize that in the 6 years I was in Indonesia, the US had changed a lot, I had changed a lot, the people I knew changed a lot and I had no idea how I was going to adjust this time. Make no uncertainties, I knew I would adjust but I didn't know what that process would look like.

You see, I was used to making adjustments, I had moved multiple times while living in Indonesia, to places with different languages, foods, cultures and lifestyles. I lived in cities, I lived in a house surrounded by fish farms and rice paddies. The solution always was to find an expat community and be united by being different, but it wasn't so simple moving to the US. I lived in the US as a kid and I never really met any groups of people who were like the expats I met in Indonesia. This time I would really have to figure out what I would do, and it ended up being one of the most difficult things I have ever done. Even to this day, I feel separated from everyone around me.

This isn't a sad story though or even really a happy one. I have adapted to being here. I have realized how it is okay to not belong but still stay. I have found things here that I love like motorcycle culture, access to buy almost anything I could ever want and certain dishes that I end up eating sometimes every week. I found a few people who while being an outsider to my outsider culture, understand my views and why I do things the way I do. Over time, any rock can be withered away by water.