simon

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

[Length cut^^]

"They do! Mom and dad are so sweet and uncle dark shows me cool things and aunt ava shows me around her lab, i have to be careful and not touch things, but im AMAZING at that, unless its irradiated, then i get to help, and touch it. And mom helps sometimes too with that stuff." They ramble off, like its totally normal for kids to mess with irradiated things.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

Her lab, huh?

[Mark perks up, curious, before he processes the radiation thing, and pales slightly.]

Uh. You- with the proper protection, r-right?

[The Captain's brow furrows a little along with Mark's worried tone, and their hand twitches in Simon's grip. They're clearly thinking about the same thing as Mark, about tubes of goo and experimental gene therapies and days of watching a heart monitor with tired eyes.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

"Why would- thats so dangerous that stuff could kill you" simon was immeadintly worried. Also remembering horrible goo and enclosed spaces and ao much oanick hes suprised his heart disnt shut down.

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Nope!" They beam. "Mom and i are immune to radiation. We eat it actually. Its one of the only things in thr blood sea besides..well blood. So mom evolved to eat it. And that passed along to me! They saved dad from it! Just slurped ir right off him. It and all its effects on him gone in seconds" they smiled. "Its why i get fo help with irradiated things because mom and i can make sure no one gets sick!"

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

You're... immune. Of course.

[The tension releases from both Cap and Mark all at once, and the Captain squeezes Simon's hand gently, their eyes closing for a brief second as they let out a slow breath.]

That sure woulda been helpful a while back!

[Mark quips, or tries to - it's in the cadence of a joke, but his voice is a little strained, and his grin looks more like a grimace, clearly still unable to get that image out of his head.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

"No fucking shit.." he whispers not mad. Just also remembering the horrible terrible goo tube. He squeezes marks and caps hands.

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

[Length cut^^]

"They do! Mom and dad are so sweet and uncle dark shows me cool things and aunt ava shows me around her lab, i have to be careful and not touch things, but im AMAZING at that, unless its irradiated, then i get to help, and touch it. And mom helps sometimes too with that stuff." They ramble off, like its totally normal for kids to mess with irradiated things.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

Her lab, huh?

[Mark perks up, curious, before he processes the radiation thing, and pales slightly.]

Uh. You- with the proper protection, r-right?

[The Captain's brow furrows a little along with Mark's worried tone, and their hand twitches in Simon's grip. They're clearly thinking about the same thing as Mark, about tubes of goo and experimental gene therapies and days of watching a heart monitor with tired eyes.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

"Why would- thats so dangerous that stuff could kill you" simon was immeadintly worried. Also remembering horrible goo and enclosed spaces and ao much oanick hes suprised his heart disnt shut down.

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

(Length cut^^)

"Oooh- i should.. pribably explain, so uhm, its a thing i inherited from my mom, see we can slid along radio waves and move through radiation, part of the whole..blood ocean creature thing, it works across universes too, since the most prominent thing in the sea besides blood was radiation it has some..intresting effects on the creatures from there, well, mom was from there..but i inherited a good bit of it!" Aspen beams.

( @no1bestcaptain )

[no1bestcaptain]

It's... interesting, that's for sure.

[The Captain keeps their voice deliberately light, tilting their head towards the transmitter again. There's something pointed in their eyes as they look at Simon, though.]

Thankfully, it seems like an ability unique to the two of you, otherwise it might be something to be concerned about.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was now reeling from the 'half blood ocean creature child' calling him dad... the implications there are... concerning to simon...

"Y-yeeah..." he whispers.

( @aspenchildofbloodandtrees )

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Yeah, thats just a me and mom thing!, oh! Where is mark?, maybe i can suprise him!" They beam bouncing in place, liking the idea od suprising the one who looks like their dad.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I... wouldn't reccomend that.

[The Captain says gently, picturing Mark's mortified face if jumpscared by a fish-child. They imagine it would probably look similar to the expression Simon has right now, if a little more exaggerated.]

I can call him, if you'd like, but I'm not sure a surprise is necessarily a good idea.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon thinks mark may a bit concerned about the mental imagery of his lifes work oozing blood and a child drippinh into existance from it on the bridge.. and is in agreement with cap that jumpscaring starshine isnt a good idea. "Y-yeah lets not scare him.." he agrees quietly still reeling, ..its.. a lot to take in..

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Okay! No spooks! I promise! Please call him though? I wanna meet him!" Aspen is a very excited grin. Bouncing in place reminiscent of mark. As is their grin. Simon may be their father but simon is a mark varient.. so there is some overlap.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

Hm. Alright, one moment.

[The Captain's mouth twitches with the temptation of another smile as they tilt their head up, away from Aspen, although they keep track of the child out of the corner of their eye.]

Computer, ping Mark, non-urgent.

[They say for what feels like the millionth time - really, how many times has this happened by now? - and Computer chimes an agreement. They glance back at Aspen, then Simon, and their gaze catches there, resisting the urge to bring a hand up and trace the curve of his cheek, the same curve they can see in Aspen's face.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was watching the excited kid and noticed caps stare. Turning to look at them with a soft warm gaze and offers his hand out gently. His perefferial vision still watching aspen.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

Aspen was bouncing carefully but excitedly in place, a bright grin on their face and their curls flying everywhere, eyes litterially glowing with excitement.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain quickly looks away at being caught by Simon, their cheeks gaining that faint pink flush, but after only a moment's hesitation they still take his hand, despite how their expression deliberately evens out and doesn't change. That's the scene Mark enters to, hurrying in despite the non-urgent marker, and his gaze zeroes in on Cap first before he notices the kid and stops dead. He's about as good with children as the Captain is.]

Hey Si, Ca- uh. ...Another one?

So it seems. Mark, this is Aspen. Don't worry, they have a way back, they're just... visiting.

[He takes a moment to process this, then shoots the Captain and Simon his trademark blinding grin, before turning it on the kid, his posture loose and easy.]

Oh, okay, good, I'm glad you're not stuck, uh, Aspen.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon watched with a tender smile. His thumb rubbing along the back of caps hand as he held it. "Yeah, theyre uh.. a bit exciteable" he said akward, but tender still.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Hiii!" They wave with both hands, a matching blinding grin on their face, which has obvious similarities to simon and mark. But their eyes are litterially glowing radiation green. "Yeah dont worry, i can come and go when and where ever i please im not stuck!" They promised. "Wow! You do look just pike dad! But with short hair!" They beam so bright bouncing in place incabale of sitting still. How much if this is the overlap with simon being a mark varient and how much is their mom is unclear.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I- you- dad? As in... hang on.

[Mark blinks, processing the kid's excited chatter and trying not to stare at their nonhuman features. The Captain's hand twitches, squeezing Simon's just a little, and their mouth twitches in that familiar way that means they're holding back an amused smile at Mark's confusion.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon slid closer so hes juuuust barely not against caps shoulder, watching with amusement and a fond look. "Hes adorable" simon whispers in caps ear

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Yeah! See when my kom and dad met and after yeeaaaarrrsss together i came along! Their best happily ever after ever! Anyway i wanted to come here because theres another version of my dad her and uncle dark mentioned some vauge stuff and i got curious. Plus i over heard aunt ava! Anyway this place is really cool!" They talk at the same pace as mark when he gets excited.

They looked around still bouncing in place their eyes glowing brighter with more excitement.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

[Mark gives his Captain a look that can only be described as 'huh??' and they take pity on him, leaning briefly into Simon and brushing their shoulders together as they give him a soft look of agreement before shifting away to their barely-not-touching position again.]

Aspen is the child of an alternate Simon, is what they mean.

[They clarify for their slightly dense Head Engineer, and they can see the moment it clicks, his eyes going wide for a second as all the similarities coalesce. The thought that in another universe, Simon isn't with the two of them, visibly flicks across his face, like he's not sure whether to be jealous over it, before his expression settles on curiosity.]

Ohhhhhh. R-Right, right, cool. So, you- I mean, he- I mean, uh, having Dark as an uncle must be wild, but Ava as an aunt, too? I bet they uh, spoil you to heck, right?

[He grins, keeping his voice light and deliberately teasing even as he quickly changes the subject from the whole Simon thing. In truth, he can't really reconcile the idea of either of them as family people, but he needs to stop thinking about Simon with a little kid on his hip and that soft expression he sometimes gets, or he'll tear up.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon watched them as he lingers as close as cap will allow. He wanrs to wrap around them but holds back. Watching them.

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[no1bestcaptain]

......heeey maaark..

With two partners like that have your ahem.

Knees and hips been more...sore.. as of late?

...I-I plead the fifth!

[Mark's eyes flick around a little frantically, his face going red, and the way his voice kicks up an octave makes the Captain step up behind him, reading over his shoulder and pressing their lips together to hold back a smirk.]

America is light-years away, love, that's not going to save you.

Wh- c-come on, Cap...

I can tell you for a fact that the answer is yes, Anon, but you're not getting any more than that. We have to at least pretend to be civilised.

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon steps up behind marks other shoulder, a hand trailing down marks spine. "Oh, we're very civilized. We can professional when needed. What happens between the three of us is truely our business and if they ask then theyre thenones initiating the... less than professional.. conversation." He hums as he pressed a particular spot mark may or may not have well.. a mark.

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

(Length cut^^)

"Oooh- i should.. pribably explain, so uhm, its a thing i inherited from my mom, see we can slid along radio waves and move through radiation, part of the whole..blood ocean creature thing, it works across universes too, since the most prominent thing in the sea besides blood was radiation it has some..intresting effects on the creatures from there, well, mom was from there..but i inherited a good bit of it!" Aspen beams.

( @no1bestcaptain )

[no1bestcaptain]

It's... interesting, that's for sure.

[The Captain keeps their voice deliberately light, tilting their head towards the transmitter again. There's something pointed in their eyes as they look at Simon, though.]

Thankfully, it seems like an ability unique to the two of you, otherwise it might be something to be concerned about.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was now reeling from the 'half blood ocean creature child' calling him dad... the implications there are... concerning to simon...

"Y-yeeah..." he whispers.

( @aspenchildofbloodandtrees )

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Yeah, thats just a me and mom thing!, oh! Where is mark?, maybe i can suprise him!" They beam bouncing in place, liking the idea od suprising the one who looks like their dad.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I... wouldn't reccomend that.

[The Captain says gently, picturing Mark's mortified face if jumpscared by a fish-child. They imagine it would probably look similar to the expression Simon has right now, if a little more exaggerated.]

I can call him, if you'd like, but I'm not sure a surprise is necessarily a good idea.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon thinks mark may a bit concerned about the mental imagery of his lifes work oozing blood and a child drippinh into existance from it on the bridge.. and is in agreement with cap that jumpscaring starshine isnt a good idea. "Y-yeah lets not scare him.." he agrees quietly still reeling, ..its.. a lot to take in..

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Okay! No spooks! I promise! Please call him though? I wanna meet him!" Aspen is a very excited grin. Bouncing in place reminiscent of mark. As is their grin. Simon may be their father but simon is a mark varient.. so there is some overlap.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

Hm. Alright, one moment.

[The Captain's mouth twitches with the temptation of another smile as they tilt their head up, away from Aspen, although they keep track of the child out of the corner of their eye.]

Computer, ping Mark, non-urgent.

[They say for what feels like the millionth time - really, how many times has this happened by now? - and Computer chimes an agreement. They glance back at Aspen, then Simon, and their gaze catches there, resisting the urge to bring a hand up and trace the curve of his cheek, the same curve they can see in Aspen's face.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was watching the excited kid and noticed caps stare. Turning to look at them with a soft warm gaze and offers his hand out gently. His perefferial vision still watching aspen.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

Aspen was bouncing carefully but excitedly in place, a bright grin on their face and their curls flying everywhere, eyes litterially glowing with excitement.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain quickly looks away at being caught by Simon, their cheeks gaining that faint pink flush, but after only a moment's hesitation they still take his hand, despite how their expression deliberately evens out and doesn't change. That's the scene Mark enters to, hurrying in despite the non-urgent marker, and his gaze zeroes in on Cap first before he notices the kid and stops dead. He's about as good with children as the Captain is.]

Hey Si, Ca- uh. ...Another one?

So it seems. Mark, this is Aspen. Don't worry, they have a way back, they're just... visiting.

[He takes a moment to process this, then shoots the Captain and Simon his trademark blinding grin, before turning it on the kid, his posture loose and easy.]

Oh, okay, good, I'm glad you're not stuck, uh, Aspen.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon watched with a tender smile. His thumb rubbing along the back of caps hand as he held it. "Yeah, theyre uh.. a bit exciteable" he said akward, but tender still.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Hiii!" They wave with both hands, a matching blinding grin on their face, which has obvious similarities to simon and mark. But their eyes are litterially glowing radiation green. "Yeah dont worry, i can come and go when and where ever i please im not stuck!" They promised. "Wow! You do look just pike dad! But with short hair!" They beam so bright bouncing in place incabale of sitting still. How much if this is the overlap with simon being a mark varient and how much is their mom is unclear.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I- you- dad? As in... hang on.

[Mark blinks, processing the kid's excited chatter and trying not to stare at their nonhuman features. The Captain's hand twitches, squeezing Simon's just a little, and their mouth twitches in that familiar way that means they're holding back an amused smile at Mark's confusion.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon slid closer so hes juuuust barely not against caps shoulder, watching with amusement and a fond look. "Hes adorable" simon whispers in caps ear

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[no1bestcaptain]

(More nightcore for the nightcore kids!, with a twist!)

Heeeree guys!

-edit anon

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTB7k2A1k/

...hot.

Mark!

Whaaaat?

[simonontheinvincible]

"Huh?...what ..is that?" Simon asked. Coming up behind mark and wrapping around him as he looks at the screen.

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

(Length cut^^)

"Oooh- i should.. pribably explain, so uhm, its a thing i inherited from my mom, see we can slid along radio waves and move through radiation, part of the whole..blood ocean creature thing, it works across universes too, since the most prominent thing in the sea besides blood was radiation it has some..intresting effects on the creatures from there, well, mom was from there..but i inherited a good bit of it!" Aspen beams.

( @no1bestcaptain )

[no1bestcaptain]

It's... interesting, that's for sure.

[The Captain keeps their voice deliberately light, tilting their head towards the transmitter again. There's something pointed in their eyes as they look at Simon, though.]

Thankfully, it seems like an ability unique to the two of you, otherwise it might be something to be concerned about.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was now reeling from the 'half blood ocean creature child' calling him dad... the implications there are... concerning to simon...

"Y-yeeah..." he whispers.

( @aspenchildofbloodandtrees )

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Yeah, thats just a me and mom thing!, oh! Where is mark?, maybe i can suprise him!" They beam bouncing in place, liking the idea od suprising the one who looks like their dad.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I... wouldn't reccomend that.

[The Captain says gently, picturing Mark's mortified face if jumpscared by a fish-child. They imagine it would probably look similar to the expression Simon has right now, if a little more exaggerated.]

I can call him, if you'd like, but I'm not sure a surprise is necessarily a good idea.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon thinks mark may a bit concerned about the mental imagery of his lifes work oozing blood and a child drippinh into existance from it on the bridge.. and is in agreement with cap that jumpscaring starshine isnt a good idea. "Y-yeah lets not scare him.." he agrees quietly still reeling, ..its.. a lot to take in..

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Okay! No spooks! I promise! Please call him though? I wanna meet him!" Aspen is a very excited grin. Bouncing in place reminiscent of mark. As is their grin. Simon may be their father but simon is a mark varient.. so there is some overlap.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

Hm. Alright, one moment.

[The Captain's mouth twitches with the temptation of another smile as they tilt their head up, away from Aspen, although they keep track of the child out of the corner of their eye.]

Computer, ping Mark, non-urgent.

[They say for what feels like the millionth time - really, how many times has this happened by now? - and Computer chimes an agreement. They glance back at Aspen, then Simon, and their gaze catches there, resisting the urge to bring a hand up and trace the curve of his cheek, the same curve they can see in Aspen's face.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was watching the excited kid and noticed caps stare. Turning to look at them with a soft warm gaze and offers his hand out gently. His perefferial vision still watching aspen.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

Aspen was bouncing carefully but excitedly in place, a bright grin on their face and their curls flying everywhere, eyes litterially glowing with excitement.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain quickly looks away at being caught by Simon, their cheeks gaining that faint pink flush, but after only a moment's hesitation they still take his hand, despite how their expression deliberately evens out and doesn't change. That's the scene Mark enters to, hurrying in despite the non-urgent marker, and his gaze zeroes in on Cap first before he notices the kid and stops dead. He's about as good with children as the Captain is.]

Hey Si, Ca- uh. ...Another one?

So it seems. Mark, this is Aspen. Don't worry, they have a way back, they're just... visiting.

[He takes a moment to process this, then shoots the Captain and Simon his trademark blinding grin, before turning it on the kid, his posture loose and easy.]

Oh, okay, good, I'm glad you're not stuck, uh, Aspen.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon watched with a tender smile. His thumb rubbing along the back of caps hand as he held it. "Yeah, theyre uh.. a bit exciteable" he said akward, but tender still.

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

(Length cut^^)

"Oooh- i should.. pribably explain, so uhm, its a thing i inherited from my mom, see we can slid along radio waves and move through radiation, part of the whole..blood ocean creature thing, it works across universes too, since the most prominent thing in the sea besides blood was radiation it has some..intresting effects on the creatures from there, well, mom was from there..but i inherited a good bit of it!" Aspen beams.

( @no1bestcaptain )

[no1bestcaptain]

It's... interesting, that's for sure.

[The Captain keeps their voice deliberately light, tilting their head towards the transmitter again. There's something pointed in their eyes as they look at Simon, though.]

Thankfully, it seems like an ability unique to the two of you, otherwise it might be something to be concerned about.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was now reeling from the 'half blood ocean creature child' calling him dad... the implications there are... concerning to simon...

"Y-yeeah..." he whispers.

( @aspenchildofbloodandtrees )

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Yeah, thats just a me and mom thing!, oh! Where is mark?, maybe i can suprise him!" They beam bouncing in place, liking the idea od suprising the one who looks like their dad.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I... wouldn't reccomend that.

[The Captain says gently, picturing Mark's mortified face if jumpscared by a fish-child. They imagine it would probably look similar to the expression Simon has right now, if a little more exaggerated.]

I can call him, if you'd like, but I'm not sure a surprise is necessarily a good idea.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon thinks mark may a bit concerned about the mental imagery of his lifes work oozing blood and a child drippinh into existance from it on the bridge.. and is in agreement with cap that jumpscaring starshine isnt a good idea. "Y-yeah lets not scare him.." he agrees quietly still reeling, ..its.. a lot to take in..

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Okay! No spooks! I promise! Please call him though? I wanna meet him!" Aspen is a very excited grin. Bouncing in place reminiscent of mark. As is their grin. Simon may be their father but simon is a mark varient.. so there is some overlap.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

Hm. Alright, one moment.

[The Captain's mouth twitches with the temptation of another smile as they tilt their head up, away from Aspen, although they keep track of the child out of the corner of their eye.]

Computer, ping Mark, non-urgent.

[They say for what feels like the millionth time - really, how many times has this happened by now? - and Computer chimes an agreement. They glance back at Aspen, then Simon, and their gaze catches there, resisting the urge to bring a hand up and trace the curve of his cheek, the same curve they can see in Aspen's face.]

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was watching the excited kid and noticed caps stare. Turning to look at them with a soft warm gaze and offers his hand out gently. His perefferial vision still watching aspen.

[no1bestcaptain]

You can trust aunt ava! Dont worry!

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

...um. Forgive me if I don't exactly take your word for that.

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

(Length cut^^)

"Oooh- i should.. pribably explain, so uhm, its a thing i inherited from my mom, see we can slid along radio waves and move through radiation, part of the whole..blood ocean creature thing, it works across universes too, since the most prominent thing in the sea besides blood was radiation it has some..intresting effects on the creatures from there, well, mom was from there..but i inherited a good bit of it!" Aspen beams.

( @no1bestcaptain )

[no1bestcaptain]

It's... interesting, that's for sure.

[The Captain keeps their voice deliberately light, tilting their head towards the transmitter again. There's something pointed in their eyes as they look at Simon, though.]

Thankfully, it seems like an ability unique to the two of you, otherwise it might be something to be concerned about.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon was now reeling from the 'half blood ocean creature child' calling him dad... the implications there are... concerning to simon...

"Y-yeeah..." he whispers.

( @aspenchildofbloodandtrees )

[aspenchildofbloodandtrees]

"Yeah, thats just a me and mom thing!, oh! Where is mark?, maybe i can suprise him!" They beam bouncing in place, liking the idea od suprising the one who looks like their dad.

@no1bestcaptain

[no1bestcaptain]

I... wouldn't reccomend that.

[The Captain says gently, picturing Mark's mortified face if jumpscared by a fish-child. They imagine it would probably look similar to the expression Simon has right now, if a little more exaggerated.]

I can call him, if you'd like, but I'm not sure a surprise is necessarily a good idea.

( @simonontheinvincible )

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon thinks mark may a bit concerned about the mental imagery of his lifes work oozing blood and a child drippinh into existance from it on the bridge.. and is in agreement with cap that jumpscaring starshine isnt a good idea. "Y-yeah lets not scare him.." he agrees quietly still reeling, ..its.. a lot to take in..

@aspenchildofbloodandtrees

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[no1bestcaptain]

Come here, love... [The Captain keeps their voice low and soft, slowly, carefully, gently moving until they can rest an arm around his back, still holding his hand with the other. Emboldened, Mark moves closer as well, approaching from the same direction so Simon doesn't feel cornered, and settling his hand lightly on Simon's shoulder.] Can you try and follow my breathing, Simon? [They ask, not demanding, just a quiet request, gently pulling their joint hands up to press against their own chest so that Simon can feel it inflate and deflate. Sure, they'd stolen the strategy from somewhere, but it often worked, so they didn't give a damn about its originality. They keep talking, too, more for the noise than expecting any kind of answer, just something to keep his mind occupied and present and focussed on them, hopefully.] We can talk this out, and we will, but let's calm you down first, hm?

[simonontheinvincible]

"..they said... theyre right. Im...i dont..."

He couldn't finish his sentance.. lightly following caps breathing pattern, not with the right depth. Not yet. Bur its better than before. This one is..particularly bad, it seems..

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain's eyes narrow slightly - they didn't see the monitor before following Simon down, they don't know what he's referencing, and multiple guesses flick through their mind in the space of a few seconds. Is he hallucinating? Referencing a past event? Or - their line of thought is cut off when Mark nudges them, his eyes dark and his face set in a solemn, harsh expression, in contrast to his usual brightness.]

Cap.

[He whispers, and jerks his head up at the monitor. Their gaze flicks that way briefly, and they can't read it properly from the low angle, but they see text and their racing mind latches on to it and figures out the issue immediately. They look back up again, and the glare they shoot at the monitor is nothing short of murderous. If looks could kill, the entire transmitter and likely the whole ship besides would be nothing more than a scattered mess of shrapnel in the vacuum of space. They're mad. But still, despite their anger making their voice shake just a little around their clenched jaw, their voice stays quiet and soft. It's not hard to treat Simon with such gentleness, even as his dull eyes make their hands tremble with fury.]

No, no, darling, I promise you're not. Those idiots don't know what they're talking about, trust me.

[simonontheinvincible]

He shakes in their hold. Eyes dull. Glassy. Lifeless. Hands trembling as he looks at rhem like theyre still blood soaked.

"I do..i do...with everything..but i dont...im..just a.."

His guilt is eating him. And hes a wreck.

[no1bestcaptain]

I wouldn't lie to you, my love. Not about this. I promise.

[They pull him a little closer, encouraging his chin or forehead to rest on their shoulder, but they don't force it, just a little guiding push with the arm around his back.]

You are not a monster. You are human, yes, with all the ups and downs that may contain, but you are not a monster. Right now, you're proving that you aren't, because no monster feels guilty for what they've done. You're flawed, Simon, and you've made mistakes and done what you had to, to survive, but you are not a monster.

[simonontheinvincible]

He sobs a full body shaking sound. Shuddering and leaning into them at last. "...why..?" He choked out. Barely audible. Wondering why they loved him... why theyd let him stay...

[no1bestcaptain]

Because this is what you deserve. Not hell. Not suffering and punishment. You always deserved a choice, a chance to prove yourself, and look what you've done with it. You've taken care of us. You've helped out on the ship. You've lived, and chosen kindness, again and again and again. You deserve love, Simon, because no matter how much you think you're a monster, it's not true. [Their voice shakes properly, now - anyone else might not be able to hear it, but to Mark and Simon, it's loud and clear. Mark near-throws himself forward as Simon slumps into Cap, wrapping around both of them with a quiet, wet noise, and it takes a second for him to find his words, but when he does, they're soft and genuine.]

You were never a monster, sunlight. An'you're ours, our Simon, you can't get rid of us now.

[simonontheinvincible]

He lets out a choked shaky sob. Clinging onto them tighter as he trembles. He loves thrm hes greatful for them.

[no1bestcaptain]

I know, I know, we got you, Si. It's okay.

[Mark runs his hand down Simon's back gently, tucking his chin over the other's shoulder, and the Captain hums in agreement, squeezing him tight in return. They might be a little emotioned-out after that speech, but Mark picks it up easily, so it's alright..]

We know you, and we know you're not a monster. We love you.

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon so slowly, but surely calms in their hold. From theirnwords and touch and it all slowly eases him back to calm. "....thank you borh" he whispers. The guilt still there but quieter in their affections.

[no1bestcaptain]

Always.

[Mark whispers solemnly, and Cap tilts their head to press a small kiss to the corner of his mouth, matching his low volume.]

You don't have to thank us, love. It's an honour to take care of you. But you're welcome.

[simonontheinvincible]

He clung close to them. Burrying his face into caps neck and holding onto mark. "...im so glad i have you both.." he whispers.

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[no1bestcaptain]

Come here, love... [The Captain keeps their voice low and soft, slowly, carefully, gently moving until they can rest an arm around his back, still holding his hand with the other. Emboldened, Mark moves closer as well, approaching from the same direction so Simon doesn't feel cornered, and settling his hand lightly on Simon's shoulder.] Can you try and follow my breathing, Simon? [They ask, not demanding, just a quiet request, gently pulling their joint hands up to press against their own chest so that Simon can feel it inflate and deflate. Sure, they'd stolen the strategy from somewhere, but it often worked, so they didn't give a damn about its originality. They keep talking, too, more for the noise than expecting any kind of answer, just something to keep his mind occupied and present and focussed on them, hopefully.] We can talk this out, and we will, but let's calm you down first, hm?

[simonontheinvincible]

"..they said... theyre right. Im...i dont..."

He couldn't finish his sentance.. lightly following caps breathing pattern, not with the right depth. Not yet. Bur its better than before. This one is..particularly bad, it seems..

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain's eyes narrow slightly - they didn't see the monitor before following Simon down, they don't know what he's referencing, and multiple guesses flick through their mind in the space of a few seconds. Is he hallucinating? Referencing a past event? Or - their line of thought is cut off when Mark nudges them, his eyes dark and his face set in a solemn, harsh expression, in contrast to his usual brightness.]

Cap.

[He whispers, and jerks his head up at the monitor. Their gaze flicks that way briefly, and they can't read it properly from the low angle, but they see text and their racing mind latches on to it and figures out the issue immediately. They look back up again, and the glare they shoot at the monitor is nothing short of murderous. If looks could kill, the entire transmitter and likely the whole ship besides would be nothing more than a scattered mess of shrapnel in the vacuum of space. They're mad. But still, despite their anger making their voice shake just a little around their clenched jaw, their voice stays quiet and soft. It's not hard to treat Simon with such gentleness, even as his dull eyes make their hands tremble with fury.]

No, no, darling, I promise you're not. Those idiots don't know what they're talking about, trust me.

[simonontheinvincible]

He shakes in their hold. Eyes dull. Glassy. Lifeless. Hands trembling as he looks at rhem like theyre still blood soaked.

"I do..i do...with everything..but i dont...im..just a.."

His guilt is eating him. And hes a wreck.

[no1bestcaptain]

I wouldn't lie to you, my love. Not about this. I promise.

[They pull him a little closer, encouraging his chin or forehead to rest on their shoulder, but they don't force it, just a little guiding push with the arm around his back.]

You are not a monster. You are human, yes, with all the ups and downs that may contain, but you are not a monster. Right now, you're proving that you aren't, because no monster feels guilty for what they've done. You're flawed, Simon, and you've made mistakes and done what you had to, to survive, but you are not a monster.

[simonontheinvincible]

He sobs a full body shaking sound. Shuddering and leaning into them at last. "...why..?" He choked out. Barely audible. Wondering why they loved him... why theyd let him stay...

[no1bestcaptain]

Because this is what you deserve. Not hell. Not suffering and punishment. You always deserved a choice, a chance to prove yourself, and look what you've done with it. You've taken care of us. You've helped out on the ship. You've lived, and chosen kindness, again and again and again. You deserve love, Simon, because no matter how much you think you're a monster, it's not true. [Their voice shakes properly, now - anyone else might not be able to hear it, but to Mark and Simon, it's loud and clear. Mark near-throws himself forward as Simon slumps into Cap, wrapping around both of them with a quiet, wet noise, and it takes a second for him to find his words, but when he does, they're soft and genuine.]

You were never a monster, sunlight. An'you're ours, our Simon, you can't get rid of us now.

[simonontheinvincible]

He lets out a choked shaky sob. Clinging onto them tighter as he trembles. He loves thrm hes greatful for them.

[no1bestcaptain]

I know, I know, we got you, Si. It's okay.

[Mark runs his hand down Simon's back gently, tucking his chin over the other's shoulder, and the Captain hums in agreement, squeezing him tight in return. They might be a little emotioned-out after that speech, but Mark picks it up easily, so it's alright..]

We know you, and we know you're not a monster. We love you.

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon so slowly, but surely calms in their hold. From theirnwords and touch and it all slowly eases him back to calm. "....thank you borh" he whispers. The guilt still there but quieter in their affections.

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[no1bestcaptain]

Come here, love... [The Captain keeps their voice low and soft, slowly, carefully, gently moving until they can rest an arm around his back, still holding his hand with the other. Emboldened, Mark moves closer as well, approaching from the same direction so Simon doesn't feel cornered, and settling his hand lightly on Simon's shoulder.] Can you try and follow my breathing, Simon? [They ask, not demanding, just a quiet request, gently pulling their joint hands up to press against their own chest so that Simon can feel it inflate and deflate. Sure, they'd stolen the strategy from somewhere, but it often worked, so they didn't give a damn about its originality. They keep talking, too, more for the noise than expecting any kind of answer, just something to keep his mind occupied and present and focussed on them, hopefully.] We can talk this out, and we will, but let's calm you down first, hm?

[simonontheinvincible]

"..they said... theyre right. Im...i dont..."

He couldn't finish his sentance.. lightly following caps breathing pattern, not with the right depth. Not yet. Bur its better than before. This one is..particularly bad, it seems..

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain's eyes narrow slightly - they didn't see the monitor before following Simon down, they don't know what he's referencing, and multiple guesses flick through their mind in the space of a few seconds. Is he hallucinating? Referencing a past event? Or - their line of thought is cut off when Mark nudges them, his eyes dark and his face set in a solemn, harsh expression, in contrast to his usual brightness.]

Cap.

[He whispers, and jerks his head up at the monitor. Their gaze flicks that way briefly, and they can't read it properly from the low angle, but they see text and their racing mind latches on to it and figures out the issue immediately. They look back up again, and the glare they shoot at the monitor is nothing short of murderous. If looks could kill, the entire transmitter and likely the whole ship besides would be nothing more than a scattered mess of shrapnel in the vacuum of space. They're mad. But still, despite their anger making their voice shake just a little around their clenched jaw, their voice stays quiet and soft. It's not hard to treat Simon with such gentleness, even as his dull eyes make their hands tremble with fury.]

No, no, darling, I promise you're not. Those idiots don't know what they're talking about, trust me.

[simonontheinvincible]

He shakes in their hold. Eyes dull. Glassy. Lifeless. Hands trembling as he looks at rhem like theyre still blood soaked.

"I do..i do...with everything..but i dont...im..just a.."

His guilt is eating him. And hes a wreck.

[no1bestcaptain]

I wouldn't lie to you, my love. Not about this. I promise.

[They pull him a little closer, encouraging his chin or forehead to rest on their shoulder, but they don't force it, just a little guiding push with the arm around his back.]

You are not a monster. You are human, yes, with all the ups and downs that may contain, but you are not a monster. Right now, you're proving that you aren't, because no monster feels guilty for what they've done. You're flawed, Simon, and you've made mistakes and done what you had to, to survive, but you are not a monster.

[simonontheinvincible]

He sobs a full body shaking sound. Shuddering and leaning into them at last. "...why..?" He choked out. Barely audible. Wondering why they loved him... why theyd let him stay...

[no1bestcaptain]

Because this is what you deserve. Not hell. Not suffering and punishment. You always deserved a choice, a chance to prove yourself, and look what you've done with it. You've taken care of us. You've helped out on the ship. You've lived, and chosen kindness, again and again and again. You deserve love, Simon, because no matter how much you think you're a monster, it's not true. [Their voice shakes properly, now - anyone else might not be able to hear it, but to Mark and Simon, it's loud and clear. Mark near-throws himself forward as Simon slumps into Cap, wrapping around both of them with a quiet, wet noise, and it takes a second for him to find his words, but when he does, they're soft and genuine.]

You were never a monster, sunlight. An'you're ours, our Simon, you can't get rid of us now.

[simonontheinvincible]

He lets out a choked shaky sob. Clinging onto them tighter as he trembles. He loves thrm hes greatful for them.

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[no1bestcaptain]

Come here, love... [The Captain keeps their voice low and soft, slowly, carefully, gently moving until they can rest an arm around his back, still holding his hand with the other. Emboldened, Mark moves closer as well, approaching from the same direction so Simon doesn't feel cornered, and settling his hand lightly on Simon's shoulder.] Can you try and follow my breathing, Simon? [They ask, not demanding, just a quiet request, gently pulling their joint hands up to press against their own chest so that Simon can feel it inflate and deflate. Sure, they'd stolen the strategy from somewhere, but it often worked, so they didn't give a damn about its originality. They keep talking, too, more for the noise than expecting any kind of answer, just something to keep his mind occupied and present and focussed on them, hopefully.] We can talk this out, and we will, but let's calm you down first, hm?

[simonontheinvincible]

"..they said... theyre right. Im...i dont..."

He couldn't finish his sentance.. lightly following caps breathing pattern, not with the right depth. Not yet. Bur its better than before. This one is..particularly bad, it seems..

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain's eyes narrow slightly - they didn't see the monitor before following Simon down, they don't know what he's referencing, and multiple guesses flick through their mind in the space of a few seconds. Is he hallucinating? Referencing a past event? Or - their line of thought is cut off when Mark nudges them, his eyes dark and his face set in a solemn, harsh expression, in contrast to his usual brightness.]

Cap.

[He whispers, and jerks his head up at the monitor. Their gaze flicks that way briefly, and they can't read it properly from the low angle, but they see text and their racing mind latches on to it and figures out the issue immediately. They look back up again, and the glare they shoot at the monitor is nothing short of murderous. If looks could kill, the entire transmitter and likely the whole ship besides would be nothing more than a scattered mess of shrapnel in the vacuum of space. They're mad. But still, despite their anger making their voice shake just a little around their clenched jaw, their voice stays quiet and soft. It's not hard to treat Simon with such gentleness, even as his dull eyes make their hands tremble with fury.]

No, no, darling, I promise you're not. Those idiots don't know what they're talking about, trust me.

[simonontheinvincible]

He shakes in their hold. Eyes dull. Glassy. Lifeless. Hands trembling as he looks at rhem like theyre still blood soaked.

"I do..i do...with everything..but i dont...im..just a.."

His guilt is eating him. And hes a wreck.

[no1bestcaptain]

I wouldn't lie to you, my love. Not about this. I promise.

[They pull him a little closer, encouraging his chin or forehead to rest on their shoulder, but they don't force it, just a little guiding push with the arm around his back.]

You are not a monster. You are human, yes, with all the ups and downs that may contain, but you are not a monster. Right now, you're proving that you aren't, because no monster feels guilty for what they've done. You're flawed, Simon, and you've made mistakes and done what you had to, to survive, but you are not a monster.

[simonontheinvincible]

He sobs a full body shaking sound. Shuddering and leaning into them at last. "...why..?" He choked out. Barely audible. Wondering why they loved him... why theyd let him stay...

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[no1bestcaptain]

Come here, love... [The Captain keeps their voice low and soft, slowly, carefully, gently moving until they can rest an arm around his back, still holding his hand with the other. Emboldened, Mark moves closer as well, approaching from the same direction so Simon doesn't feel cornered, and settling his hand lightly on Simon's shoulder.] Can you try and follow my breathing, Simon? [They ask, not demanding, just a quiet request, gently pulling their joint hands up to press against their own chest so that Simon can feel it inflate and deflate. Sure, they'd stolen the strategy from somewhere, but it often worked, so they didn't give a damn about its originality. They keep talking, too, more for the noise than expecting any kind of answer, just something to keep his mind occupied and present and focussed on them, hopefully.] We can talk this out, and we will, but let's calm you down first, hm?

[simonontheinvincible]

"..they said... theyre right. Im...i dont..."

He couldn't finish his sentance.. lightly following caps breathing pattern, not with the right depth. Not yet. Bur its better than before. This one is..particularly bad, it seems..

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain's eyes narrow slightly - they didn't see the monitor before following Simon down, they don't know what he's referencing, and multiple guesses flick through their mind in the space of a few seconds. Is he hallucinating? Referencing a past event? Or - their line of thought is cut off when Mark nudges them, his eyes dark and his face set in a solemn, harsh expression, in contrast to his usual brightness.]

Cap.

[He whispers, and jerks his head up at the monitor. Their gaze flicks that way briefly, and they can't read it properly from the low angle, but they see text and their racing mind latches on to it and figures out the issue immediately. They look back up again, and the glare they shoot at the monitor is nothing short of murderous. If looks could kill, the entire transmitter and likely the whole ship besides would be nothing more than a scattered mess of shrapnel in the vacuum of space. They're mad. But still, despite their anger making their voice shake just a little around their clenched jaw, their voice stays quiet and soft. It's not hard to treat Simon with such gentleness, even as his dull eyes make their hands tremble with fury.]

No, no, darling, I promise you're not. Those idiots don't know what they're talking about, trust me.

[simonontheinvincible]

He shakes in their hold. Eyes dull. Glassy. Lifeless. Hands trembling as he looks at rhem like theyre still blood soaked.

"I do..i do...with everything..but i dont...im..just a.."

His guilt is eating him. And hes a wreck.

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[no1bestcaptain]

Come here, love... [The Captain keeps their voice low and soft, slowly, carefully, gently moving until they can rest an arm around his back, still holding his hand with the other. Emboldened, Mark moves closer as well, approaching from the same direction so Simon doesn't feel cornered, and settling his hand lightly on Simon's shoulder.] Can you try and follow my breathing, Simon? [They ask, not demanding, just a quiet request, gently pulling their joint hands up to press against their own chest so that Simon can feel it inflate and deflate. Sure, they'd stolen the strategy from somewhere, but it often worked, so they didn't give a damn about its originality. They keep talking, too, more for the noise than expecting any kind of answer, just something to keep his mind occupied and present and focussed on them, hopefully.] We can talk this out, and we will, but let's calm you down first, hm?

[simonontheinvincible]

"..they said... theyre right. Im...i dont..."

He couldn't finish his sentance.. lightly following caps breathing pattern, not with the right depth. Not yet. Bur its better than before. This one is..particularly bad, it seems..

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain lets out a breath at the sound of his voice - at least he's talking - and they tighten their grip on his hand, switching tactics.]

No, my love, no. You're not a monster, shhh. You're Simon. You're beautiful, perfect, kind, compassionate, loving Simon. Not a monster, I promise.

[They murmur, as Mark finally gets ahold of himself, forcing his muscles to relax as he slowly eases down into a crouch beside Cap and inches closer.]

What they said. You're okay, Si, we're here... y-you didn't deserve any of that, sunshine, you were just doing what you had to, that doesn't make you a monster...

[simonontheinvincible]

He couldnt speak again. His breathing was shallow and hed used all the air he had in his lungs on that sentence. His hands shaking. Eyes still dead. Guilt still roaring. He wanted to ease into them. Believe them. But he couldnt. Because the guimt he feels down to his bones says that anon is right. And he doesnt deserve this... he deserved to die down there.

[simonontheinvincible]

They could never love you. Not if they knew what you did. Youre just a butcher. A monster. A mass murderer lying to the only people naive enough to act like they give a damn. You deserved to die down there. @no1bestcaptain could never love you. Neither captain nor mark. Not if they knew what youve done. And they'll find out the truth eventually.

Simons eyes go dead hearing those words. Rage wanted to flare. But he knew his partners were on the bridge and he didnt want them to see him like that. To see him angry.. his guilt swarms. Telling him that what the anon said was true.. that he did deserve his death. That his partners would turn on him if they Knew... even if the more logical side of brain said in it was false. That cap and mark Love Him. That They Know even without the knitty gritty details.. and they love him anyway. But his swarming guilt tried to convince him otherwise. And it seemed like it was winning. His eyes dead and glassy. And face lacking its emotion...

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain twitches as Simon goes tense, their gaze flicking up from their datapad, like they sensed it, and when they see that familiar blank look in his eyes, their work is forgotten instantly.]

Simon, love?

[They call, their voice low and even, for now. Mark turns away from his own screen at their tone, monotone as ever to the untrained ear, but to him, it's practically a giant blaring red alarm. He doesn't say anything yet, though, casting worried eyes over both of his partners as the Captain slowly stands and sets their datapad down on the desk.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon drops to his knees. The message still visable on the screen. Plain for them to read. His face still dead and glassy. Guilt eating away inside him. He didnt make a sound.. hearing them call him such a sweet name... but he felt like he didnt deserve that sweetness.

[no1bestcaptain]

[The Captain follows him down instantly, their knees clanging to the metal floor without so much of a wince even as Mark makes a quiet, worried noise.]

Simon, look at me. Can you tell me where you are, love?

[They're still calm, thinking this is a flashback they can guide him out of, their hand hovering by their chest slightly, waiting until he's a little more with it to touch him, just in case. Mark steps closer, trying to keep his footfalls quieter, and while the Captain's gaze is locked onto Simon, Mark's the one who catches sight of the text on the monitor, his face turning thunderous immediately. It clearly takes a lot for him to stay quiet, his jaw almost as tight as the Captain's.]

[simonontheinvincible]

Simon didnt react. His dead glassy eyes fixed on his hands held out infront of him. Hed all but stopped breathing. The guilt eating him up inside. He didnt speak. He didnt lean into cap or mark. He didnt feel like he deserved their comfort... the guilt ridden part of his mind winning out thr logical side that knows they love him...

[no1bestcaptain]

Oh, love...

[Their voice softens a little more, going sad as Simon still doesn't respond. They shift a little closer, watching him carefully, and usually if he was responsive they wouldn't do this, but they trust themself to be able to tank anything he lashes out with if need be, so they slowly reach out, carefully sliding their gloved fingers across his own until they're holding his hand gently.]

Hey. You don't have to say anything, Simon, that's okay. I'm here, my love, you're safe, you're on the bridge. You're safe.

[simonontheinvincible]

All he managed out was "...im a monster..."

He looks at his hands. Still shaking. Still dead eyed. The words on the screen having shook him deeply and his guilt roaring in his mind and gut.