happy one year, @sinister-femme. i am in awe of you every single second of the day.
there is a version of me that existed before you. i remember her only in fragments now, like a town i passed through once but never learned the streets of. i think love is a strange thing to build across oceans of ordinary days. it asks you to make a home out of phone calls, to kiss through glass, to memorize the weight of someone’s hand from memory alone. somehow, against every sensible law of distance, we have done it anyway.
i have spent a year trying to find language big enough for you. every sentence feels too small. every metaphor folds in on itself. no arrangement of words can hold the shape of what you’ve become to me.
before you, i thought love was supposed to arrive like lightning something loud enough to split the sky in two. but you came like dawn, so quietly i didn’t notice the world had changed until everything was lit.
you loved me through days when i couldn’t imagine a future worth reaching for, never asking me to become easier to love. you met me exactly where i was, and held my shaking hands as if they had always been steady.
there is something impossible about the way you make ordinary moments feel immortal.
laughter that lingers long after the joke is over. conversations that wander until morning. silences that never ask to be filled. somehow you’ve built an entire life out of things that would look insignificant to anyone else.
devotion is made of tiny things, sweetheart. remembering, noticing, choosing, again and again. loving someone is learning their constellations until you can find your way home with your eyes closed.
you’ve changed me in all the quiet places: in the way i speak to myself, in the way i imagine tomorrow, in the way i no longer brace for love to disappear the moment i begin to trust it.
i hope one day you understand what you’ve given me: not just happiness, but permission.
permission to believe softness can survive. that tenderness is not weakness. that love doesn’t have to hurt to be real.
a year has passed, and i’m still finding new reasons to fall in love with you. if there is a life after this one, i promise to find you. in every universe, in every timeline, in every life. i will find you.
happy one year, my sweet, hilarious, gorgeous, ethereal girl.
you are the gentlest thing that has ever happened to me, and i will spend the rest of my life trying to love you the way you have taught me love should feel steady in its devotion, sacred in its tenderness, and like home in every quiet way that matters.
