Six Condoms +Surviving a Sociopath

[sixcondoms]

SAME DOG, SAME TRICKS

A sociopath typically has a conscience, but it’s weak. Antonio knows that taking money from the women he dates, his family, the limited friends he thinks he has is wrong, and he might feel some guilt or remorse, but that doesn't stop his behavior. Nothing motivates him to be humble. He's naturally performative and always in character, that's what tricks his mind into thinking he's a writer when he hasn't touched his script in months. Being a sociopath lends to his false sense of self. It's why he can chide his father about his alcoholism, but it doesn't register in his mind that he himself is now a full blown stoner. Instead of facing me, the debt, the failure of A2FIT, his homelessness, the way his life has been stagnant for years, he simply finds a new target, a new human sex toy, another vice to cope with a very unfulfilled life. When I met him years ago during his separation and after his divorce, Antonio was still floating through life, at his grandmother's house without a plan. While I worked and when I slept, he would text constantly, Facebook incessantly, email nudes of himself, all in line with wanting to be seen and acknowledged. It's why he modeled and failed, it's why he's auditioning but unbooked. It's why he layers his lies in self pity to glean empathy from Stephanie. He needs an audience, new emotional sponsors that he can practice his stories on. His stale favorite is the time he was at a dinner party with Jay Z and Beyonce, but he casually leaves out the detail that he was working as wait staff at that Grammy after party. Or the house in Grand Prairie he claims to have designed and built, yet he didn't consider keeping after his marriage failed, so his grandmother could have a safer place to live in her golden years. That'd be too logical, possibly to selfless. The one thing that is constant about Antonio Aaron is that he is the same dog, with the same tricks. He's just clever enough to find new fools to give him bones.

[sixcondoms]

THE LEGEND OF GIGOLO TONY

From my previous posts, I expounded on Antonio's tendency to interacially date throughout his 20s and well into his 30s. While he's still quite friendly with White women, his current tryst with Stephanie Byrd helps support his current effort to esteem hisself as a Black God. Within pan African culture, misogynoir runs rampant because American Black males tend to cherry pick parts of the liberation movement, usually abandoning the parts that say to honor Black women. Roughly 3 years ago, Mr Aaron was playing house with another White woman 6 years his senior in Sherman Oaks. Since her family was affluent, she and her biracial son resided in a plush condo where she invited her new melanated house boy into her space for sex, childcare, and a bit of Black Male machismo protection among other things. Things were going quite swimmingly. As his story goes, they had an argument, she attempted to make things physical, so he left with a few things in a duffle bag and never looked back. Although by definition Antonio is a textbook sociopath, he never highlights his actions or behaviors as what leads to his stints of being displaced. He's never successfully found his footing to live alone in Los Angeles. To date, his last solo residence was in Little Elm Texas while he worked for Satander prior to jumping ship to move to Los Angeles with Korean Stephanie H in 2014. Prior to separating from Amy, he established his first Llc for A2FITUSA using her address. Filing for this type of business classification in the state of California will top out around $360 if you use Legal Zoom, so I'm sure Amy helped pay for that too. All in all, there is a legacy of theft and deceit that surrounds Mr. Aaron. His charm and aesthetic makes his sociopathy easy to overlook. He leverages sex ultimately as his weapon to woo, because beguiling women is part of the scam. Things will come to a head for him sooner than later. Hoe-ing has an expiration date.

[sixcondoms]

THE DEVIL IS IN THE DETAILS As I wait to hear back from Dallas County Court 1 about Antonio being served, every other day I can guarantee to happen upon a tweet that reconfirms why showing empathy to a sociopath is a lost cause. When lying is second nature, the lines get blurred on what's irrational and what's reality. Antonio is a very undisciplined dreamer. For the current LLC he has, A2Fit was launched poorly in 2018. Why would you anchor your business for an entire year and a half in Playa Vista when you have no car to get to your work site? Regrettably the first time I loaned him money for his business was June of 2018 in the amount of $500. According to him, it was the security fee the city required for him to operate his boxing fitness workouts on one of their sanctioned lawns. To date he's completed less than 50 workouts in Playa because he lacks clientele. While Mr Aaron spends 12+ hours a day online, he doesn't apply any of that time toward building his business and prospecting for new clients. Yes, he gloats and muses about "the company", but there's no substantial revenue. The data that he submits to Playa Vista is false (of course I have receipts). Its unfortunate that at his big old age of 35, his insecurities push him to constantly lie about a failed business venture. Instead, he will continue to shout down a very hollow Twitter well the untruths about his success because he likes to tweet what sounds good. Compulsive lying is a key trait of a sociopath. They will often disregard the truth to make themselves look better or to manipulate others into extending favors. So, why would someone in financial ruin post about getting additional Llcs for imaginary businesses? Call it wishful thinking, he's not smart enough to understand tax laws or shelters. Pay back can't come soon enough......

[sixcondoms]

ALWAYS THE WEAKEST LINK

I find it interesting when these types of messages spew from certain Black males who live a life of total hypocrisy. Antonio subscribes to: -Colorism, he's never dated a woman as dark as himself and leans on the ideologies of preference -Although he's sexually fluid, he is quite homophobic (despite having gay friends and acquaintances) and subscribes to the notep notions of a gay agenda -His first wife was Italian, to date he still fancies White women but stop fucking them on the premise that he wants his children to have "color" -His second long term girlfriend who is full Korean, wears Blackness like a costume (box braids, cornrows, etc), and she still parades his grandmother on her IG like it's her foster mom. He let's that shit go unchecked -The last White woman he played house with back in 2017 is 6 years his senior and took care of him financially while he acted as the surrogate Dad for soccer practice for her biracial son (he'll tell you a Mark Wahlberg story connected to all of that) - He helicopters Black woke women on Twitter and IG for sport, but he's still innately classist, sexist, and full of empty pan African machismo -Layllen, a woman who considers him a friend and has often extended her home and space to him, is someone he chides as being unrealistic and flighty because she practices positive thought and manifestations. She has a plush place to stay at the W in L.A., while he's still a Hobosexual (always with the misplaced priorities) -His Talent agent is a White woman who regularly sends him out on auditions for officer or soldier roles, he's had one single television placement in 2019 - His roommates are White - His writing mentors are White - His dick tingles when he's the only Black body in the room, because he's wildly performative -He enjoys and engages in tokenism - He believes in 2A and thinks him being a gun enthusiast is a social and racial equalizer For Black men and women He is not a protector, he's a predator. Mr. Aaron is 35 year old wannapreneur in the throws of life giving him back everything that he's taken from others. He's a habitual liar and manipulator. Social media is his safe space, because online he can be anything he wants to be for those gullible enough to subscribe to his fairytale. Regrettably, he's been the biggest mistake of my life from the first DM he sent me in 2012. He really could have just left me alone, but he targets kindness. He exploits those who sacrifice to help him, and sooner than later his sociopathy is going to elevate to a criminal level. But yeahhhhh, how are we going to protect our women?

[sixcondoms]

A COMFORTABLE DELUSION Nothing says opportunist louder than Stunt Queens on social media. Beyond the money that he owes me, one of the most embarrassing and disgusting traits of this man-child is his daily need to expel imaginary money, opportunity, and status on social media. It speaks loudly to his depression, social anxiety and low self-worth. He lives in a pool house by the grace of a coke head white man who's the house boy for a wealthy heiress. Her Dad owns the Pasadena estate. Prior to being at the moldy mansion, he overstayed his welcome with a very pleasant and successful entrepreneurial couple who allowed him refuge in a spare bedroom where they stored their make-up and photography equipment. He never even had an air mattress, just a year plus (from 2017 to 2018) of sleeping on the floor. Occasionally they allow him to walk their dogs when they are away for travel for small pay and space away from the pool house, it’s very kind of them. When he was asked to leave, AA of course spoke poorly of them for not using him in an Atomic Blonde themed photo shoot and the disorganization of his departure dates prior to him coming back to Dallas in the Fall of 2018. Once again comfortable delusion didn't quite register to him that he'd been in their guest room rent free and eating their food as an empathetic favor. Today, they are still his best friends, brothers as he likes to say. Yet there's no brotherhood to be found when you exhaust the kindness of others into your life. It’s all very sad when you think of it, because dilemma after dilemma nothing has clicked for Mr. Aaron that perhaps he's in a karmic cycle. Maybe he's reaping the effects of lying to the first Stephanie that could afford to move herself and him to Los Angeles on her nursing salary in 2014 when he necessarily could not. He's existed on the waves of feminine energy and empathy for at least 5 years. From 2016-2017, he was house boy for a white woman and her biracial son. Amy M seems to have sold the $660k Condo where he was allowed to stay and she moved back to Dallas, now residing in Richardson. I wonder how much money he owes her. Everything is not always as it seems and its puzzling why an abled body man with the highest level of misplaced confidence hasn't settled into the harsh reality that he's a hobosexual. Oh, that’s right, there’s the new Stephanie who's an apartment leasing agent with her own place and side income from braiding hair. Housing problem solved. $1400 from a disability check through the Navy doesn't go very far when stunting is a habit in Los Angeles and no one's booking workouts. Boasting of who you know isn't quite as effective when that Hush Network doesn't even believe in your fitness brand enough to patronize it. In his mind, I’m sure he thinks he's being covert, but his lack of authenticity is wildly obtuse. I've never heard of a proBlack man with so many faux White Allies. Everyone is his best friend, everyone is his sister, or his brother, but that framily doesn’t quite look like him. Aspirations of being white adjacent, whether its spending your 20s and 30s fucking seasonless white pussy or chumming up in their social circles, just hadn’t quite given him the American dream he clamors to attain. He enjoys his tokenism and being the only Black man in the room, no matter how trivial it is. Eddie Murphy would never....

[sixcondoms]

ONCE ITS POSTED, ITS PERMANENT

Today, I awoke to a notification on Google Hangouts, because my ex is trying to play it safe and delete the media shared between us. I get it, I'm the stalker. Could I be the crazy one, am I making it all up? The scores are the scores. And liars don't realize the best way to not have to undo dumb shit is to never let it happen in the first place. The downside to dating a scammer is that they always believe they are the smartest person in the room. If you are kind and generous, they take those sentiments as aloof and naive. The reality is I’ve always felt great empathy for him. He’s a masterful storyteller which also makes him an exceptional liar. Always the hero of his story or the betrayed victim of someone else’s actions, Mr. Aaron is void of accountability. So, his spiral of mishaps keeps turning. Antonio is recognizably his greatest asset and his own most lethal threat. Mr. Aaron is an over-sharer. So, whether it was trip to the sex shop to buy a "massager", or another video of him jacking his dick, he desired to be watched. He aches to be admired and I would always oblige him. Subsequently, saving the videos was just a sentimental notion on my behalf because he used to express so much sweetness in these digital moments. Now all of the content will work in my favor for my day in court. Looking back, his level of deception really aligns with that of a sociopath, because his theatrics were unconscionable. He was always manipulative and more committed to the lie than interacting with me in an honorable way. The video thumbnail above was from a video he sent to me the day of my surgery. Months prior he kept asking me if I set a date, because he wanted to be there for it. I knew he wouldn't be able to, because his finances were perpetually low. Him visiting Texas for the last 12 months was always on my dime, but I took comfort in the effort. The week of my procedure, I gave him my Dad's contact information, so he could call to get a status on my progress while I was under. I made it through the procedure just fine. 12 fibroids removed and now we could continue the plan of "being parents and building our lives together". Those were his words. I made my Dad aware of who I had given his number too, because a few people knew about my health issues. Antonio was the only one who didn't text or call. My father made it sternly clear, he didn't call. For that, I was ashamed. When I came to consciousness and the anesthesia was wearing off, Mr. Aaron had created a video through Hangouts, telling me how proud he was. "You are never far from my thoughts, and always in my heart." I can tell that he wasn't in Pasadena, he made the video from Stephanie's apartment. Another of many lies, but my only desire in that moment was to get home and get well.

[sixcondoms]

POLYGODKING When I discovered the man I was exclusively having sex with was delving back into polyamory, it was through IG. It was a moment I regret not standing up for myself. I had been comporomised emotionally, financially, and now physically. At the bottom of the #Polynation roll call was his handle, age, and location. That same day he responded to that post, he needed money for food to which I sent. It was during one of my Houston visits to my sister. She'd recently experienced a spiral fracture, so I was in town to take her to the doctor the following Monday, which he knew. His income is very fixed, so like clockwork between the 10th-15th is when he reaches the bottom of his disability stipend. With financial disparity looming, no address to call his own, layered family issues, and auditioning with no callbacks, he regularly turned to the internet to create an unreachable persona. His audience of enablers are quite fooled. I watched. I waited. I wondered if he would ever stop self sabotaging and work on being honest about course correction. Instead he mused among the poly community for something new to fuck. There isn't a pussy deep enough or anal penetration big enough to give him a climatic shift. His hypersexuality makes him feel like a hero and a heinous addict all in one breath. Antonio will never catch his breath.

#sixcondoms

[sixcondoms]

THE MAKINGS OF A SOCIOPATH

Emotional abuse and manipulation is the unhealthiest of partnerships. Every word and sentiment is rooted in control. This pattern was part of a larger strategy, because Antonio attempts to once again leverage his hardships for more grace. He did it in 2012 when I met him, again in 2013 when he reconciled with his wife after our first sexual encounter, once more prior to him moving to L.A. with the first Stephanie, and finally in 2018 when he was bunking in Woodland Hills. He recognizes that he's dealing with an empath but also very logical one. As time would have it, the taker continues to take as the giver is willing to give.

#sixcondoms

[sixcondoms]

WHEN ITS TIME TO COLLECT YOUR COINS

No answer can never be the answer when you owe someone money. In this case, I'm only choosing to pursue an amount that he agreed to pay back. The $3k is but a mere fraction of what he owes me. When you are pursuing a debt through small claims court, there are a series of steps you have to follow prior to filing formally your intent to sue. Since Mr Aaron is technically homeless, I sent the first and final notice to resolve the debt to multiple addresses: -his grandmother here in Dallas -the couple in Woodland Hills he lived with -Stephanie's address (which was conveniently saved under my Pizza Hut account) -His talent manager -an address listed on his resume -the moldy mansion he occasionally stays at where he resides in the ant ridden pool house To date, none of the letters have been returned, so the first task is complete. As bitch made as he is, I know he won't atone for what he's done, nor will he show up to the hearing. He copes with avoidance, but you cant out run a court judgment. He'll probably contend with the gravity of the situation after his first wage garnishment. I will stoop to all levels about my money.

#sixcondoms

[sixcondoms]

I posted this tweet days before discovering the IG story that would change everything. Although he would text me daily, his response time was slower. I stopped getting messages beyond a certain time of night. There was brevity in our communication that led me to believe he was occupied. His lying was intentional and habitual. What I didn't understand was why he wouldn't just let me go or start his new relationship on the right foot. I suppose the emotional divisiveness is what kept things going. He liked secrets, and I knew all of them....even the ones he didn't speak.

[sixcondoms]

THE BIGGER THE LIE, THE BIGGER THE LOSS

This text came the morning after Stephanie's birthday brunch. He dismissed her and the event as if it were a production meeting on a sketch that he was working on. In hindsight, his deception was always clear and people are their patterns. The lies that they tell spirals them deeper and darker into a state of mind that is void of accountability. When you lack morality support in your life, it's easy to create the next lie. He stayed in character as a faithful male and honest person.

[sixcondoms]

Humor seemed to be a bridge that would quell arguments and get us back on track. To be honest, we never argued. It was too hard. My empathy for him being homeless and in financial ruin kept the necessary conversations at bay. With every good morning text, we aspired to encourage one another. Yet after the road trip from Dallas to L.A. to get his goddaughter to school in time for freshman orientation, I knew there was someone else. He took too many phone calls out of sight, checking his notifications became incessant. I didn't press because I know he was still grieving from the loss of his uncle. I knew he wasn't strong enough to be in mourning and balance a sex addiction. Stephanie was accessible and available, but I underestimated what he was keeping from me. His trauma came from every direction. He would cry often, self medicate with weed, buoy from one emotional state to the next. The crisis was never ending, but in all of that we could still make one another laugh.