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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@sleazehh
About to disappear for a month or 12
God kept me and blessed me. Took away some things and gave me better.
hate incidents against elderly East & Southeast Asians have skyrocketed recently, especially in the Bay Area (article) (thread) . here are some:
an 85 year old Thai man, Vicha Ratanapakdee, was tackled to the ground and murdered in SF
an assailant pushed down a 91 year old Asian man, followed by 2 other elderly men and women, in oakland
a 52 year old Asian-American woman was shot in the head with a flare gun
there have been over 20 assaults and robberies in Oakland’s Chinatown targeted towards the elderly in the past 2 weeks
a 61 year old Filipino man’s face was slashed on the subway in nyc & no one assisted him
a Vietnamese community center burned down in oakland
this is not new – since the pandemic began, attacks on Asian-Americans have spiked:
an 89 year old Asian woman in brooklyn was set on fire in July
an Asian woman in brooklyn was doused in acid in April while she was taking out her trash
almost 3000 hate incidents against Asian-Americans were reported from march to the end of 2020 (keep in mind, most incidents are unreported)
this is what happens when white supremacists refer to the coronavirus as the “china virus” & “kung flu” and promote rhetoric that harms Asian communities. today is the start of lunar new year celebrations & attacks are expected to increase. as a response, local governments across the us have stationed increased police presence in chinatowns, but a white supremacist police system, which will not protect our elders and will also threaten Black lives and safety, is not the solution. most asians are unwilling to report hate incidents because we do not believe police will help, and last week, police shot and killed Christian Hall, a 19 year old Chinese-American, during a mental health crisis. we can’t accept tactics that uphold white supremacy. what we need is aid for our communities:
thread of donation links
sign up to accompany elderly Asians while they run errands, etc
gofundme for funds to distribute amongst Bay Area + elsewhere community organizations
gofundme for Vicha Ratanapakdee
gofundme for VACCEB (the community center)
keep up with Stop AAPI Hate
lunar new year is our biggest celebration & is supposed to be a time of celebration and family, but due to white supremacy & xenophobia, our communities are hurting. it is incredibly painful to see our elders – who our cultures place a huge amount of respect and reverence on, and who often don’t even tell their families about these hate incidents because they don’t want them to worry – being targeted in this way. please donate if you can & spread whatever resources you come across. i will update this post with more links as i find them.
I just want to be surrounded by so much love in my life. And not just relationships. Love for my job, my home, the stars, the sunsets, the place I live where ever in the world that is. I want to experience love in all forms
when kafka said "all the love in the world is useless when there is total lack of understanding" and when richard siken said “if you love me, you don’t love me in a way I understand.”
Don't get sucked into the "if they really cared I wouldn't have to say something" spiral. No matter how close you are with someone, it's unfair to expect them to know things you haven't actually communicated.
Apologize when you’re wrong. Never let your pride be bigger than your relationships.
“Wherever I am, the world comes after me. It offers me its busyness. It does not believe that I do not want it.”
— Mary Oliver, Why I Wake Early
“If flowers can teach themselves how to bloom after winter passes, so can you.”
—
My blessings come from God, which is exactly why I never look for anything in return when I do something for someone.