Balbok is quick to swipe the tears off. Taking a deep breath.
Rammar would scold him. Would say it’s unworthy for an orc to cry.
Yet here he is, still mourning for something that happened a while ago.
Even worse now, he made Lena sad too. He really didn’t want this.
He had to fix it somehow! What would Rammar say now?
Orcs usually don’t bother about the past. Only now is important.
That may be true. But does he want to forget the past? Does he want to suggest that, even?
Does he want to become just hostile towards humans and elves, like his brother decided to? Yes, he would always jump by Rammar’s side, bare teeth at Corwyn, the human they’ve met recently. But does he really hate him? No, he doesn’t really care about him, as long as he’s not hurting his brother. He doesn’t really care about Alannah either, if he were to be honest.
There have been so many good things about the past.
Good things he likes to think back about.
And he feels suddenly a new spark of motivation inside him..
“That day, I promised Mati that I protect my brother, you know?
We lost much, but I became stronger since I gave that promise.
Rammar may not be here with me now to scold me, but—”
He pulls out of the hug now, smiling at her.
“— I’ll use my strength instead to protect my weird friends here from getting hurt! To make more good memories. For that I’ll keep doing my best! And you too, okay? Just call me and I’ll help you!”
It was funny how this place worked sometimes; now and then she’d mourn the life she’d lost back home-- sure, friends from her past had made their way into the city and that was great, she was thankful for a few familiar faces but the one thing that kept her spirits high were those she was meeting now, of different worlds and walks of life. She had wanted to be the best person she could possibly be back home and here was no different and usually, she was a pretty good judge of character.
Though the guilt remained nestled in her heart, she wouldn’t allow it to overcome her now... especially when Balbok was honestly doing his best to brighten the mood (usually that was her job). A gentle smile replaced her frown.
“You have a good heart, love, I can tell.” There was something about him she liked; something positive and warm-- those were the kind of friends she liked to keep. “Between you and I, this place will be safe for sure.” She fell silent for a moment. She’d promised herself she would never repeat the mistakes she made the night of Mondatta’s assassination. She had to keep those she cared about safe, no matter what. “And we’re friends, aren’t we? We’ll learn and grow together. If you ever need anything, I got your back.” She gave a light laugh before switching the subject. “So, Rammar’s your brother? What’s he like?”