Toxic sloth

Whatevenever

[overheard-at-hema-practice]

I will figure out your body’s resonant frequency and play a drum solo that will dissolve you

[anarqueeen]

The heros journey keeps trying to get me but ive been unloading an entire clip of 9mm into every mentor that tries to teach me anything. Ive killed 7 wizards this way.

[fjordojustice]

Refusal of the Call

[anarqueeen]

GET AWAY FROM ME

[freegiftjones]

one time i was making potato soup and i needed broth for it but i was out of broth. but in my dog food cabinet there was a carton of chicken broth that i had bought for my dog. now the box did say HUMAN GRADE and the ingredients were just bog standard chicken broth. it did say something about joint health for dogs on there. but the ingredients were normal. i even compared the ingredients list to some normal person broth and they were the same. so i did put dog broth in that soup and it did taste completely normal. but i did use the dog broth.

[tenderheliotrope]

[reallybadblackoutpoems]

a bird came down the walk (1891) - emily dickinson

"a bird came down the walk - he bit me ow"

[depsidase]

[trapny]

This is more inspirational than I think it was originally intended to be

[tinyideastuff]

poems

[cowboyhatesithere]

Daily gratitude

I don’t have kids

I don’t spend money on nicotine

I don’t gamble my money away on sports

I’m not reliant on a chat bot for all my life functions

My books/CDs/DVDs collection is plentiful

[frogmoss1]

My pussy barks

[milk5-deactivated20260704]

Spent the day with regirock. He's a fantastic guy. Great sense of humor and also 200 physical defense

[homunculus-argument]

The possibility of me emotionally reacting to air pressure changes, and my boyfriend having an allergic reaction to ground spores makes a funny concept. You know it's going to rain when the way he starts sneezing makes me want to tell him to shut the fuck up.

[homunculus-argument]

well won't you fucking look at that.

[chloesevignysbowlcut]

[monster1994]

Lately ive been finding myself relating to the dying pig

[monster1994]

[dailyquests]

You can now play as 🐗 Hog.

[allegedly-human]

[aggot]

everyone wants masc carpenter trade until his rough calloused handjob sands your thing down small and smooth as a river stone

[slygirlboy]

2026 - the year of the dullahan

[im-mender]

[woman-respecter]

suburban women on september 15 1967 tuning in to star trek and seeing fuck-or-die mode spock getting in a sweaty man fight with captain kirk in amok time

[depsidase]

[kragehund-est]

ive done it, ive finally overcome my black-and-white thinking and established a gray area full of nuance. *looks closer* wait *notices my gray area is an illusion comprising smaller squares of black and white, and my nuance is just a more complicated set of rules* fuck