𝚂𝚕𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚣𝚜

[slothzs]

Why does my dog always look like dog when I'm sober, but he always decides to be species confused when I'm intoxicated

Like I swear he's turns into a cryptic when I'm high.

He makes me very confused sometimes

Picture I took sober

He very dog, very cutie , very old Chihuahua

Me blazed and drunk.

No good. I need holy water maybe?

[slothzs]

Today I got a four pack of fruit punch beatbox for basically $5 because I was doing doordash the other day and did a delivery 20 minutes away I got a $10 cash tip and so basically I only paid $1.25 for each beatbox And I got four of them 😛

weirdo dude that asked me if I had a boyfriend right after giving me a cash tip.

I took that cash out of his hand, and said yes I'm taken and power walked down the stairs of the apartment building

Actual footage of me running away with $10 in hand towards my tiny Chevy spark with bedazzled stars and bug stickers

[slothzs]

I swear my silly stupid cat is trying so hard to Open my shutters so he can sit on a small indoor window sill when there's massive fireworks going off rn

Like sir, I know your mother (me) didn't give you brain cells but let's really think hard for a second.

I don't think this is a good idea

Like and I have the glass window shut... So it's not like he would panic and fall out of the window.. but I'm just like. Can we not add to my stress? Please and thank you

No cuz this is literally what my cat is acting like

[slothzs]

Happy 4th ig

Currently laying in bed drunk off a beatbox and high with my chi huah huah sleeped by my leg

We are surviving the night together

Like mother like son both intoxicated

(he's on gabapentin for the fireworks)