destined for the dirt

had my chance but blew it. I pray only for sleep now. Tw *inc*st "survivor"* *medically diagnosed c-ptsd and schizoaffective* *self-diagnosed AuDHD*

[forgetyouryellowbird]

Made this for my darkroom class. A little messy, looks like he's stumbling over his feet

[221bluescarf]

You think you know what a person in psychosis looks like, but you probably don't. It's not confined to someone walking down the street screaming at hallucinations or ranting to everyone about the FBI implants. And it's not an axe murderer. It can be someone quietly sitting alone. It can be someone having an anxiety attack. It can be someone who's disoriented and dissociated. It can look like anything.

I've had psychotic episodes where I simply come across as depressed and a little confused. I've had them where I'm anxious and rocking and crying but I'm not loudly proclaiming my delusion.

I've had psychotic episodes where I thought my family was being stalked and I had to harm myself to appease the beings stalking us but nobody knew. My injuries were hidden and I simply stayed inside the house.

I've had voices make me feel terrible so I just cry and talk about what an awful person I am but that just looks like low self-esteem.

It can be right under your nose.

Stop acting like you know exactly what psychosis looks like - especially if you assume people who have it are violent and out of control. If someone tells you they have psychosis or schizophrenia, don't treat them like a ticking time-bombs waiting to kill someone.

[smellslikebrokenspirit]

TW: CSA

What happens when your favorite cumrag gains sentience?

What happens when that isn't enough to stop you?

[smellslikebrokenspirit]

"Father's" Day

To the men who pulled our teeth

And laugh about how we never bite back

May your bones rot inside your flesh

You call yourself a father

But all I see is a miserable motherfucker

[nothing0fnothing]

As survivors we are constantly surrounded by people who think that abuse is simply a minor inconvenience in a child's life and it actually makes it incredibly hard to just get on with our adulthoods.

How many of us have had therapists who brushed off our experiences? I did. I told a therapist everything when I was 18 in hopes he could help me heal and he told me what I was suffering from was "cultural differences". They do that because even though their job is to empathise with people, they think child abuse is something that happens to children and disappears when they become adults.

How many of us have had a "well meaning" person try to convince us to get back in touch with the people who abused us? Crashing into your life with statements of "you only have one mum" and implying you're bitter for not simply getting over it. They do that because they refuse to understand how being orphaned could be better than having the parents some of us have.

Has anyone else had that vampire person who just wants to hear all the gory details of everything that happened to you, even when you've told them over and over that you aren't comfortable? They do it because even though they have all the information to put together that it was bad enough for you to not want to relive it for their entertainment, they are convinced that their performative "support" is them being helpful for us.

The world is full of people who have the privilege of not understanding what child abuse actually entails, but still want to have an opinion on how adult survivors should live our lives.

[abuzd]

[my-funked-up-life]

That's a fact

[daddysdisappointment]

Never.

[daddysdisappointment]

Never.

[anxietyproblem]

[catchymemes]

[disturbedwizzard]

[willgrahamscock]

me existing: am I doing something wrong?

[escuerzoresucitado]

[patricia-taxxon]

ive found that partially treated mental illness can sometimes look to uninvolved onlookers like faked mental illness.

[patricia-taxxon]

"someone who really has pOCD would be disgusted and horrified at their intrusive thoughts" or maybe i'm in therapy & am going by the books, being radically ambivalent to my intrusive thoughts instead of wasting energy mentally washing my paws of sin. i'm not going to perform my rock bottom for you for the sake of being believed.

[elamimax]

"I won't perform my rock bottom for you for the sake of being believed" is going straight into my permanent storage holy shit

[sparcky]

me, looking back on it all:

[cannibalchicken]

[thedankmemes]