(tree) hugging for beginners

I'm a (tree) hugger, a sushi enthusiast, and a lover of wild mustangs. My favorite tree is the Western Red Cedar (Thuja plicata)

[zocher]

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Trier, Germany

I love Trier! I used to live in Bitburg, which is quite close by.

[newyorker]

Our Hate Has Saved Nickelback

Could all the people who have gleefully insulted Nickelback be the ones who have helped it to endure? Ian Crouch considers.

Photograph by Buda Mendes/Getty

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Oh no! What have we done?

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5 Things People Who Are People Will Understand

I have to say I am so done with the BuzzFeed articles that have titles such as "34 Things People Who Do Stuff Will Understand".  Thank you so much for finally posting something that will help me connect with thousands of other people who don't have enough time to go out and spend time with real people. I don't need a list of things to reassure myself that I belong to a group.

1. If you wear glasses they will fog up when you come in from the cold, they will get water on them when it rains, and let's be honest, contacts are better.

2. I'm awkward, you're awkward, everyone is awkward.  Just get over and accept yourself!

3. I'm a girl/woman/female who does things that aren't stereotypically "female".  If you're a guy/man/male reading this you might fall into the male box. Big deal, everyone is different.

4. Everyone has interests and hobbies, but is it really necessary to go up to someone and say, "I really like hiking!! It totally defines who I am."  The answer would be no.  Instead of announcing to the world how put together and active you are, go out and do whatever your supposed hobby is.

5. No one cares how many different times you get nostalgic about random crap from the 90's.  Embrace today!!

The point is that I think we're all trying to hard.  I literally just spent an hour thinking about how to go about using Tumblr better just so I can try to impress people who might not even know me.  Honestly, what's wrong with me (us)? Why have we ended up at a place where we spend more time on our computers, phones, and tablets than actually engaging the world around us? I know this is a bit contradictory as I sit here in a coffee shop, plugged in and not engaged, but it's the reality of the situation.

My main beef with articles that try to help us identify with some type of category is that I don't think they do help us connect. Wouldn't it be better to just talk to people? Or even if you just read a book or were comfortable sitting alone drinking a cup of tea, wouldn't that be better than closing yourself off by scrolling through a bunch of FaceBook posts that you hardly glance at?

On that note, I'm going to stop typing and try to engage with people in a meaningful way. 

[allthingseurope]

Limeuil, France (by Photograferry)

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I really miss the simplistic beauty of Europe.

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Paris Letters

I've read about 30 books this year, but my favorite has been the book I'm currently reading (I'm not even halfway through yet!).  It's a memoir called Paris Letters by Janice MacLeod.  The author stopped her corporate life to go travel in Europe and ends up falling in love with a man in Paris.  It's fantastic.  AND she did all the artwork for the book because she's an artist and that's what they do.

I love this book because it inspires me not to get stuck in whatever society thinks I should do and to remember to listen for my own drumbeat. While I probably won't go travel in Europe for a year, I definitely will be going back for at least a month, maybe even two.

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888,246

At the Tower of London, the art installation "Blood Swept Land and Seas of Red" represents each British fatality in WWI.  888,246 ceramic poppies have been planted around the tower. WWI was the war to end all wars, but 96 years later our world is still tormented by fighting, hate, and death.  

In the United States, we spend this day honoring the veterans of all the wars of which the US has been a part.  I have much respect for the men and women who have chosen to serve.  In the United Kingdom and much of Europe, today is known as Remembrance Day, a day to remember the wars that devastated much of Europe. The poppy is a symbol of this remembrance.  During WWI, the first life to return to the war churned fields of France and Belgium was the poppy.  It has become a symbol of the blood spilled in war.  For myself it has also become a symbol of hope.  A symbol that there is life still in the world, and there is hope that we can hold on to.  

Today, as we thank and honor our veterans, I think we should take time to remember how much has been lost and how much we could lose. We should also take time to remember that there is hope in the world.  That hope is Jesus, who shed his blood for all of us. 

So pray, pray for peace; pray for healing; pray for reconciliation.  Because there is still hope in the world.  Just like the poppies in the fields of Flanders, Jesus comes into our lives when we are the most devastated.

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Onward

There is a moment when you learn of someone’s death, whether a close friend or not, when your soul sinks. Your brain processes what it’s just learned and you just can’t believe a word. That instantaneously someone is gone, even if they’ve been gone for hours or days, hearing it makes their death real. You then have whatever length of time to grieve, depending on how close you are. You may fall to the floor, you may weep, you may just take a moment to remember all the good things of that person’s life, but when that’s all over life moves on.

Their life may have ceased but ours continues. We keep waking up, eating, brushing our hair, going to work, breathing, living. Somehow we can continue to exist without their presence. Life goes on.

(I write this as a reflection on death. There have been a few people I knew who passed away this summer. This is for them, we still go on, but we don’t forget you.)

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A Partnership

I don't think a good Christian wife is someone who thoughtlessly follows her husbands direction.  I don't think she should be a person who must solely rely on the protection and care of her husband.  I don't think that she is someone who indulges her husband's opinions.  She should be someone who has agreed to enter into a partnership.   A marriage is about being partners.  There should not be one person who is in control more than the other.  Yes, as a wife I should listen to my husband, but my husband should also listen to me.  We need to make decisions together and respect one another in a way that allows for a productive and healthy relationship.   One of the most successful relationships I have observed is that of my parents.  My mom has sacrificed much in her life to be supportive of my dad and his job.  But my dad has always encouraged and supported her, in all of her endeavors.  Both of my parents have needs, and I have seen over the past 24 (OK maybe more like 20) how my parents have worked together to do what needs to be done. 

When it comes to the relationship that my husband and I have I try to do the same thing.  We try to help each other and be there when needed.  We make each other breakfast in bed.  We do each others laundry.  We take each other to work.  I think it would be revolutionary if more people thought about relationships and marriage as a partnership.  

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We all have a purpose in life.  Each one of us has value. We don't do anything that we can't handle.  Whether we live for 20 years or 100, there is no life that is not meaningful.

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Young Whipper-snappers

Last weekend I went to a Young Life Camp with two other leaders and 7 girls.  It was a great experience in so many ways.  I was able to bond with our team leader and the girls.  The school we lead Young Life at is located in a part of town that has a mix of kids demographically but is predominantly hispanic.  Most of the kids are come from low income families.  Needless to say, it's a bit of a culture shock.  

I've done some traveling and have gone to foreign countries to places where people are poor.  However, it can be an enlightening experience to go to those places in my own town. I think it's a shame that Americans tend to have a focus on those outside of our country when we have many people here in our country who also need help.  (Which is probably a whole different post) Anyways, I was having a great time on this trip and it's interesting to interact with these girls because we're coming from totally different places (I'm white, middle-class).  I ended up going on a short walk in the woods with a few girls.  While we were walking several questions about our surroundings came up. "Is that poisonous?" "No" "What's that?" "That's Oregon Grape" "Why is that baby tree there?" "Because it grew from a seed." "Where did the seed come from?" "From a pine cone, like this one." "Where did the pine cone come from?" "From a older tree, like this one." "Wow" (This is roughly what we said) They were so fascinated by all of the nature.  They asked lots of questions about lichen, mushrooms, rocks, moss, and trees.  I know that I get really excited about nature, but I guess I never paused to think that it could actually be interesting this particular group of kids.  Girls who are more interested in clothes, boys, and cell phones.  Girls who are afraid to get even the smallest speck of dirt on their jeans or who don't want to accidently step in elk droppings.  Who then decide to step in the droppings and realize that they're not squishy like dog poop, but instead are hard.

It was an experience that caused me to realize that I actually to have the capacity to get through to these kids.  If they're willing to hear me talk about elk poop and moss, I could talk to them about anything.  And if I can talk to these girls about those things, I can talk to other kids about it too. 

They're so surprising and so fun. I feel like so many opportunities have opened up and I can't wait to learn more about these kids!

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En Las Noches Claras

En las noches claras by Gloria Fuertes

En las noches claras,  resuelvo el problema de la soledad del ser.  Invito a la luna y con mi sombra somos tres.

Translation:

On clear nights, I solve the problem of loneliness. I invite the moon and with my shadow we are three.

This is one of my favorite poems.  It's simpleness brings a depth that I feel is unique.  I think it takes a special talent to be able to express something complex in so few sentences.  If I were writing about loneliness it would probably take me twice as many words, if not four times. I also like the way that the Spanish flows, it's very poetic. (Pun intended)

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I guess I cut my hair two weeks ago.

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Nuevo Ano

"So this is the new year. And I don't feel any different. The clanking of crystal Explosions off in the distance (in the distance). So this is the new year And I have no resolutions For self assigned penance For problems with easy solutions So everybody put your best suit or dress on Let's make believe that we are wealthy for just this once Lighting firecrackers off on the front lawn As thirty dialogs bleed into one I wish the world was flat like the old days Then I could travel just by folding a map No more airplanes, or speed trains, or freeways There'd be no distance that could hold us back."

The New Year- Death Cab For Cutie

I spent my New Year's Eve with my husband and his family and a few of their friends.  The best part was eating good food, playing fun board games, and just spending quality time together.  I've always thought that New Year's Eve was a strange holiday.  I guess it's exciting that there's a new year, but honestly nothing really changes.  

We watched the ball drop in Times Square and waiting for it felt like waiting for something amazing to happen but then at the last moment you realize that there isn't much that is new.  It's not like waiting for Santa Claus on Christmas Eve, or waiting for a baby to be born, or waiting for someone to arrive at the airport, it's incredibly anti-climatic.  The only thing you're waiting for is for the clock to strike midnight (which is does every night).  

We watched the ball drop, we cheered, we kissed, and then we all went to bed or went home.  That's it.  I totally get why people like to get drunk on New Year's Eve, there's not really that much to be excited about.

The only thing I find nice about a new year is feeling like I can restart. Feeling that because it's a new year I can make plans and goals for the coming months and hope that I can complete all of them.  It's amazing how much hope a new year can bring someone.  For me last year was awesome.  For others that may have had an equally as good year or they may have had a totally shit year.  But for all of us we feel this strange sense of hope that this year will be better or just as good.  A sense of hope that we will be better.  We'll be better friends, better spouses, better at sports, better at eating healthy, just better.

It's tough because honestly we should be trying to better ourselves constantly throughout the year not just in January.  So my resolution for this year is to not forget what my goals are, so here they are:

-Cimb Mt. Adams. (seriously, my husband and I have been talking about this since we started dating, which is almost 4 years ago)

-Run a 10min mile for 3 miles.  (I used to be able to do this.)

-Fit into my Lucky Brand jeans.  (I had these jeans for almost 4 years and about 2 years ago I couldn't fit into them anymore.)  

-Write at least one blog post/month.  (January: check!)

-Read: A Sand County Almanac The Creation The Song of the Dodo Finding Darwin's God Anna Karenina The Sound and the Fury

-Play ukulele and sing for open mic at Northtown (A coffee house here in town.)

-Take a group of girls to Young Life camp.

-Can: peaches, green beans, tomato sauce, apple sauce, and pickled asparagus.  Basically make an can enough food so that we don't have to buy as much

So there it is.  I don't feel much different, besides being slightly hopeful that this year could be totally killer. 

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The end of beauty as we know it

What if we stopped wearing makeup? I'm sitting at the airport in Seattle, looking around at the people around me and noticing the obvious, lots of women wearing makeup. I'm the odd woman out because I don't wear makeup. When I stopped wearing makeup it took me about a year to get used to it. Which I think is sad. Why should we only be OK with ourselves after we've caked on layers of paint to cover up something we think is flawed. What if we all just stopped? Stopped putting it on, stopped comparing ourselves, and learned how to like, if not love, the person underneath the mascara and blush. Think of the people in your life who don't wear make up. Fathers, brothers, children, husbands. They don't feel the pressure to be required to put on a face every time they leave the house. Just think about it. A world without makeup, a world where people have real faces.

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What to do when you have a tonne of apples: apple pie+apple bread=well fed Simpsons.

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If a leaf falls...

l(a le af fa ll s) one l iness

-E.E. Cummings

Today I laid on the floor of my living room staring at the ceiling, staring at my books, staring at my husband trying to add some source of productivity to my day.  I picked up my book of E.E. Cummings poems and read the first poem in the book, which was the one I've copied above. I felt a little like a leaf today.  As if the wind was blowing my emotions around.  There are moments when my husband and I are silly and goofy together.  We honestly have such a good time together. Then I end up laying on the floor staring at a ceiling lamp that looks like a boob and feeling like I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. Trying to find some sense of purpose because I don't really have a job and I'm not in school anymore.  So I get up and go to my computer to try to start something productive, which at the moment is creating photo projects on Shutterfly and feeble attempts at writing blog posts.  After a while I realize how mundane my productivity is, remember that my husband is at work, remember my family is far away, and I begin to cry.

I want to say I'm lonely, I want to say I'm sad, but I think I'm just melancholy(not just sad or depressed but also pensive).  I don't want to allow myself to wallow in self pity because I know that I'm not helpless.  I can't allow myself to be lonely because there are people for me to spend time with(my husband, his family, and friends down the street to name a few) and I can't allow myself to be sad because I just shouldn't be sad.  

I think what I'm trying to get at here is that I feel like I can't figure out what to do with my life.  I have a degree in biology but I feel so underqualified for everything.  I'm new in town so I feel like I have no connections.  And there are just so many options out there.  From going back to school because that's what I know to becoming a youth ministries leader because that's what feels safe yet adventurous.  Plus I'm trying to decide how much I want to change myself and my goals to fit opportunities that arise.  I recently applied to be an assistant brewer at a major hop company here in Yakima and am now considering getting a certificate in brewing,   There are also jobs like being a biologist for the US Forest Service that still make me really excited because I love trees and nature and this beautiful state.  It seems as if there is no time at all to act on the decisions I have in front of me, but also like there is all the time in the world.  As if I have my entire life ahead of me (which in fact I do, we all do).  

I so glad it only took me an entire blog post to figure that I can't figure out what to do with my life.

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The Simple Life

Since my move to Yakima earlier this summer I have found myself between two desires.  The first is the realization that just working, and living, and being is a simplistic bliss.  There is something incredibly satisfying about going to work, working hard, and coming home tired (tired for a good reason).  The sense of accomplishment that you are working hard to support yourself and another person is such a good feeling. The second desire is while the simplicity of working at a fruit stand is nice, I have a hunger to do something more intellectual.  I don't want to be stuck here for the rest of my life working at a job that only gives me joy 50% of the time. I have a need to do something that challenges my brain, something that will make me feel proud of myself.  I have a degree, don't I? I recently met with a former professor/advisor to discuss doing some data analysis for one of her projects.  I heartily accepted, knowing that this would be the perfect opportunity for me push myself a little.  The meeting reminded me of all the reasons why I changed my major to Biology and all the reasons why, while I was at school, I continuously fell in love with it.  I came home from the meeting with visions of myself as a researcher or a professor at my alma mater.  I wondered what kind of research would I do to earn my Master's and then my Ph.D.? Would my colleagues and students hold me in high regard like many of the mentors I have?  It was a profound reminder for me to not give up dreaming of things to come.  To not settle for a mediocre job in a mediocre town.  Before I moved here I knew there was something more than just Yakima, I was reluctant because I knew the opportunities were less abundant.  Somehow in the few months I've been here all that has been my life is Yakima.  While I can't just jump into a graduate program right away, there are many things I can do in the meantime to prepare myself and the make the most out of this dingy place.  And remind myself that there is always more to life. Note: It's not that I hate living here, I just need to not live here forever.