Snamione Hoe @snangers - Tumblr Blog

it’s been a few years but i’m coming back to share that i’ve been thinking about snape and how he deserved a big tiddy goth gf and no i will not be taking any questions

questionable-bones-n-slime

He is the big tiddy goth gf

snangers

this is so true!!!!! 😤

it’s been a few years but i’m coming back to share that i’ve been thinking about snape and how he deserved a big tiddy goth gf and no i will not be taking any questions

peaky-arthur

Story of my life

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I’m going to rewrite the harry potter series and it’s going to be called Hermione Granger and The Glorious Glock where she gets a gun and shoots voldemort through the skull and then everyone is free to continue their education in peace. It’ll be 3.5 pages long.

aerosorceress

they’re in Great Britain where in the world is an 11-year-old black girl going to get a gun

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the store

sebto360

Britain isn’t America. You can’t just walk into a random supermarket and buy a ton of guns. In fact, a gun is several hundred pounds each due to you needing to have a separate license for each one. Then you also need to have it where no one could accidentally find it and if anyone apart from you knows where the gun is, you lose your license and gun. I think it has to be locked up in a position no one will ever find it in.

Pretty much, an eleven year old kid is not gonna get a gun in Britain.

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she goes to a wizard school with a three headed dog in the broom closet.

failure-to-thrive

Hermoine isn’t black???

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Yes she is, page 1 line one of Hermione Granger and the Glorious Glock reads “Hermione Granger took her black ass to school” nice try racist.

if-youre-not-a-dog-then-leave

Hogwarts Classes as John Mulaney Quotes

Care of Magical Creatures: You need to show dominance over your puppy.

Defense Against the Dark Arts: STREET SMARTS!

Potions: I grabbed it, drank all of it, and said "It's perfume."

Flying: Cars were pulling up and looking over to see who just did that piece of shit move, expecting to see like a hundred-year-old blind dog, who's texting while driving and drinking a smoothie. Instead they see a 28-year-old healthy man trying his best.

Transfiguration: This is an on fire garbage can. Could be a nursery.

History of Magic: That’s like when your gram would be like, “We’d all go play jacks down at the soda fountain!” and you’re like, “No one knows what you’re talking about, you IDIOT.”

Muggle Studies: "I think Emily Dickinson's a lesbian." And they're like, "Partial credit."

Frog Choir: So we put in seven dollars and selected 21 plays of Tom Jones' "What's new pussycat"

laisvega

It’s funny how I ship Hermione with everyone except Ron.

talksick

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nothing’s gonna hurt you baby, as long as yr with me you’ll be just fine nothing’s gonna hurt you baby, nothing’s gonna take you from my side

#snamione af

sodomymcscurvylegs

NOTHING is funnier to me than the fact that Dumbledore literally designed the PERFECT protection for the Philosopher’s Stone but still let the McGonagall enchant a giant chess set and Snape make a Legend of Zelda puzzle purely for the DRAMA of it all. And y'all say Dumbledore wasn’t ever visibly gay.

catboybreeder

Dumbledore when Snape and McGonagall came to him with their suggestions, knowing FULL WELL how unnecessary they were:

seleneofthejungle

Flitwick, approaching nervously: Dumbledore, I heard that Snape and McGonagall are helping, and I’d like to design a – Dumbledore: – a room filled with enchanted keys. Flitwick: – a room filled with enchanted keys! Dumbledore: