YOU ARE THE REASON
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NASA
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@sodomyandgonorrhea
A boy named Zachary had two wishes for the Make-A-Wish foundation. He wanted to meet (and become) Hellboy. Ron Perlmen, an actor in his 60s and THE Hellboy from the films, wanted to be the one who met Zachary and donned four hours worth of makeup to take on the role again. When he met Zachary, he ordered the boy (and his family) burgers, shakes and fries. And Zachary got to have Perlmen's makeup artists transform him into Hellboy as well.
Intrusive thoughts are unwelcome involuntary thoughts, images, or unpleasant ideas that may become obsessions. They are upsetting or distressing, and as a result, can be difficult to manage or eliminate. Everyone has some inappropriate thoughts at times, but people with mental illnesses may attach significance to them, making such thoughts become paralyzing, anxiety-provoking or persistent. Some mental illnesses that can turn unwanted occasional thoughts into intrusive persistent thoughts are:
obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD),
depression
body dysmorphic disorder (BDD),
attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
According to Lee Baer (a specialist at the OCD clinic) intrusive thoughts, urges and images are of ‘inappropriate things at inappropriate times’ and usually fall into three categories: violent, sexual or blasphemous. Many people experience the same type of bad/unwanted thoughts that so plague individuals suffering from intrusive thoughts. For most people, these thoughts are a ‘fleeting annoyance’ that they are able to dismiss. Stanley Rachman, a London psychologist, presented a questionnaire to healthy college students and found that virtually all of them said they had, from time to time, thoughts of sexual violence, sexual punishment, ‘unnatural’ sex acts, painful sexual practices, blasphemous or obscene images, harming elderly people or someone close to them, violence against animals or towards children, and impulsive or abusive outbursts or utterances. Such bad thoughts are universal among humans, and have almost certainly always been a part of the human condition. One study suggests that the content of intrusive thoughts may vary depending on culture, and that blasphemous thoughts may be more common in men than in women. When intrusive thoughts occur with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), patients are less able to ignore these unpleasant thoughts and may pay undue attention to them, causing the thoughts to become more frequent and distressing. These thoughts may become obsessions which are severe, paralyzing, anxiety provoking, persistent and constantly present. The possibility that individuals suffering from intrusive thoughts will ever act on those thoughts is low. Patients who are experiencing intense guilt, anxiety and shame or who are upset over these thoughts are different from those who actually act on them. A history of violent crime will dominate those who feel no guilt or remorse for such urges; the very fact that someone is tormented by intrusive thoughts and has not acted on them is an excellent predictor that they will never act upon these thoughts. Intrusive thoughts may involve violent obsessions about hurting others or themselves. These can include such thoughts as harming an innocent child, jumping from a bridge/mountain/top of a tall building, urges to jump in front of a train/automobile, and urges to push another in front of a train/automobile. Rachman’s survey of healthy college students found that virtually all of them had intrusive thoughts from time to time, including thoughts of:
causing harm to elderly people
harming or killing a person/small child/animal
imagining or wishing harm upon someone close to oneself
verbally abusing someone
Sexual obsessions involve intrusive thoughts or images of sexual actions (kissing, touching, fondling, oral sex, vaginal sex, anal sex and rape) with inappropriate parties (strangers, acquaintances, family members, parents, children, friends, coworkers, animals and religious figures) involving heterosexual or homosexual content with persons of any age. As in the case of most sexual obsessions, sufferers may feel shame and live in isolation, finding it hard to discuss their fears, doubts, and concerns about their sexual identity. They may also fear that they may act upon such thoughts/perceived impulses in the future, and question whether or not they have already acted in such a way. (Ex: a son has intrusive sexual thoughts regarding his mother. He obsesses over these thoughts, and fears that he is attracted to her. He may dwell on instances where he may/may not have been aroused by her, and eventually comes to dread being in her presence, having convinced himself that he is turned on by her.) Depression may be a result of the self-loathing that can occur, depending on how much these thought obsessions interfere with daily functioning. Concern over these thoughts may cause an individual to scrutinize their bodies to determine if the thoughts result in feelings of arousal. Unfortunately, focusing attention to any part of the body can result in feelings in that part of the body, so this becomes a vicious cycle. Blasphemous intrusive thoughts are a common component of OCD, and have been documented throughout history. Notable religious figures such as Martin Luther and St. Ignatius were known to be tormented by intrusive thoughts relating to their faith. (Martin Luther had urges to curse God and Jesus, and was obsessed with images of ‘the devil’s behind’. St. Ignatius had numerous obsessions, including a fear of stepping on pieces of straw that formed crosses, fearing that it showed disrespect to Christ.) A study of 50 patients with a primary diagnosis of OCD found that 40% of them had religious/blasphemous thoughts and doubts — a higher, though not statistically significantly different number than the 38% who had the obsessions related to the cleanliness (eg. dirt and contamination) that is more commonly associated with OCD. According to Fred Penzel, a New York psychologist, some common religious obsessions and intrusive thoughts are:
sexual thoughts about God, saints, and religious figures
bad thoughts or images during prayer or meditation
thoughts of being possessed
fears of sinning or breaking a religious law/performing a ritual incorrectly
fears of omitting prayers or reciting them incorrectly
repetitive and intrusive blasphemous thoughts
urges or impulses to say blasphemous words or commit blasphemous acts during religious services
Suffering can be greater and treatment complicated when intrusive thoughts involve religious implications, as patients may believe that these thoughts are inspired by Satan. This makes them fear punishment from God and/or have magnified shame because they perceive themselves as sinful. Baer believes that blasphemous thoughts are more common in Catholics and evangelical Protestants than in other religions (Jews or Muslims tend to have obsessions related more to complying with the laws and rituals of their faith, and performing the rituals perfectly). He hypothesizes that this is because what is considered inappropriate varies among cultures and religions, and intrusive thoughts torment their sufferers with whatever is considered most inappropriate in the surrounding culture.
Members of aristocracy or royalty are referred to as having ‘blue blood’, but why? The phrase originated with the Spanish, sangre azud, and refers to the pale-skinned Castilian ruling classes who prided themselves on never having interbred with darker-skinned races.Therefore, their blue veinous blood was plainly visible underneath the surface of their skin. There’s even a particular shade that’s meant to represent this color: royal blue.
The author of this article is named Beth, though she does not give a surname. Her attacker is Jorge Herrera of The Casualties.
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"I totally bum people out because I happened to have been sexually assaulted by the singer of a band they like. Like REALLY like. I know, I know. I should have tried harder for a band just begging to be rejected and ridiculed so it wouldn’t ruin your iPod rotation but hey, then again, it really wasn’t my choice. But man, what a total inconvenience to poor you - to know something bad about a band you love. Just ignore the facts, I mean it WAS a long time ago. It’s not like I can still remember I was wearing cargo camo shorts and a v-neck white Hanes t-shirt … an outfit TOTALLY putting off do-me vibes with my freshly shaved head and not shaved legs and … wait. Hmmm. "… Did you know I also make people feel awkward because I will openly post about my assault on Instagram or Facebook wherever I see mention of this band by ‘friends?’ I mean … that must be really uncomfortable for them … me invading their personal space like that. Like the kind of invasion you’d feel if someone were to pin you against a wall by shoving their hands down your pants from both the front and the back while pressing their entire body weight against your 16-year-old, 90 lb. body as you cry and try to fight them off. No, no wait, it’s probably not like that but still. What a buzzkill. I mean, I should just learn to keep my mouth shut. I didn’t press charges so like…what right do I have STILL bringing it up? I’m sure he’s changed and moved on in life. I hear he’s a GREAT guy. "It’s sad because there was a time in my life when I felt completely comfortable to confront a complete stranger, in person, wearing THIS BAND’s shirt or patch. I would tap them on the shoulder, look them in the eye and say, ‘Hi, my name is Beth and the singer of THAT SHITTY NY PUNK BAND WITH SHITTY LARGE HAIR AND BONDAGE PANTS sexually assaulted me when I was 16. You may have heard rumors of him doing that before but from here on out you can never say you didn’t meet a victim and have the chance to hear their story.’ Sometimes they’d want the details, sometimes they even admitted they had heard it about him before. The one amazing thing all of these complete strangers had in common was that they BELIEVED ME. They felt compelled to talk, cry, relate or brainstorm. Like this was a totally fucked up thing that happened and we were not gonna sit by and take it anymore. In the end, 100% of the people I talked to removed the shirt/ patch/ pin/ etc of the band. One boy even took his shirt off and heaved it into a fire. All really small gestures to you, but to me it felt really empowering to tell my story. To have someone, through actions, say, ‘Yeah, man. I’m on YOUR side.’ ‘You can only be a victim if you admit defeat,’ were words I lived by. These random faces gave me strength by standing behind me and… Yes, yes, true, we were younger then. Young, naive, full of energy and allowances, so much more passionate about rights and wrongs and doing good. Plus, we totally weren’t in the middle of a beer with our friends and you know, I wasn’t ‘killing the vibe.’ Or the shirt wasn’t ‘vintage,’ and the patches weren’t reaaally hard to come by. I mean that could totally be from their first tour – that’s worth SOMETHING. "I am now just a stay-at-home mom who finds time to look at Instagram between diaper changes and feels the need to leave a comment like, ‘Oh, hey, that guy in that picture took away all sexual desires for 10 years by assaulting me (underage) at a friend’s house. He’s the reason I didn’t have healthy sexual relationships til my mid-20s.’ "Maybe if I marched in a parade, you’d at least ‘like’ my photo but asking you to confront a friend or possibly not put other women in danger by bringing him around or NOT BUYING HIM BEERS AS IF HIS PRESENCE IN THIS TOWN WARRANTS CELEBRATION. I … ugh. I’m tired too. Maybe we’re just too old to give a shit anymore. If only there were a way to repost meaningless online articles for masses to see by clicking one button that in turn puts an unheard story out for millions of new eyes to read from the comfort of a computer chair. Then and only then might I get a little support but … wait no, no. It’s still just he said-she said. And really … what if it got back to him? It might make a situation awkward. Awkward like having someone shove the back of your head at their crotch while trying to explain, ‘It’s just a little 1,2,3 you can do it,’ while you put all your strength in your arms to steady your weight and almost bite through your tongue trying to ensure your mouth is locked shut but … oh no. No, wait … "Well, guess what everyone. Here I sit during nap time, comfortable in bed, laptop open, protesting in my own half-assed way as your friend. Or maybe I WAS your friend before I moved out of the city to start a family. Maybe I was only ever just your bartender, waitress, check-out girl, seamstress, childcare provider, ex-girlfriend, show promoter, charity worker, show goer, or even just the girl in the bar seat next to you. But here’s who else I am: I am the survivor of a sexual assault at the age of 16 by a man more than 10 years older than me. This man cornered me in a room and tried to force me to perform sexual acts on him, stating he would tell everyone in the van I did it anyway so I might as well. When I fled the room, he chased me down the hall, pinning me against a wall and shoving his hands down every orifice he could find while shoving his mouth over mine to prevent my muffled screams and tears from being heard. When I eventually broke free, I locked myself in an abandoned room until friends came to me. I slept in that room only to be disturbed once by a band member who simply knocked on the door and said, ‘You don’t have to open the door, just listen. You don’t even have to tell me what happened because I already know and I’m really sorry.’ And I’m not sorry if YOU CAN’T HANDLE THAT.
"When I came out that next morning, 16 years ago, the band was gone, my wallet was stolen, and I was left a shirt by the band as if it were some sort of consolation prize. The irony of the band’s name, and me being a CASUALTY in my own right, was not lost on me. All these years later and every time I write those words, speak them, re-live them, I choke back vomit. I remember how this singer smelled, tasted, his jagged rotten teeth, his worn leather skin, how the band argued about not cutting their hair because it was their statement, and mostly how utterly fucking helpless I felt. How scared, dirty, ashamed, used, rejected, confused, alone and ruined I felt. I feel all those emotions when my friends play shows and fests with this man. When they put their arms around him at bars, when they defend him. Hell, I feel all this just because he simply still breathes. Through my travels, I met other girls and heard their stories and know that no justice has ever been served. Not legally, not musically, not even a small road bump in his band or his shitty pathetic life. And now … now I’m at fault for telling my story again I’m sure because man, you already bought those show tickets and they WERE $30.00 and you don’t want that going to waste. Yeah, I get it. I told. I’m the bad guy. "Well, fuck you, Jorge. Fuck you and your shitty band. I don’t want to be your victim or storyteller. I want to be the wife of my husband and mother of my son without ever wearing your memory. But I can’t. What I can do is raise a man who respects women and their boundaries, but even then your shitty legacy will live on behind the reasons and examples I lay out for my son. I’m not your victim, asshole. I’m your survivor. And this is my story and if it makes you uncomfortable, well then at least we share some common feelings for once. Ya know … ‘I’m so sorry if I’m alienating some of you, your whole fucking culture alienates me.’"
On Sinead O’Connor’s infamous performance on a 1992 episode of Saturday Night Live she sang an a cappella cover of Bob Marley’s ‘War’, though she changed it’s lyrics concerning racism to address child abuse. As she sang the song’s final word, ‘evil’, she held up a photo of then pope John Paul II and tore it apart.
“Fight the real enemy,” She said before throwing the pieces towards the camera. (SNL had no foreknowledge of O’Connor’s plan; during the dress rehearsal she had held up a photo of a child refugee instead.)
The audience was completely silent, offering neither boos nor applause. Executive producer Lorne Michaels described the incident as ‘on a certain level, a betrayal’, but also ‘a serious expression of belief’.
A nationwide audience saw O’Connor’s live performance. NBC would wind up receiving a total of 4,400 calls regarding her performance, with all but seven criticizing it.
In a 2002 interview, when asked if she would change anything about the SNL appearance, O’Connor replied, “Hell, no!”
It has been reported that during some rapes, the victim would retreat into a fantasy world from which they could not wake up. In this catatonic state, the victim lived in a world just like their normal one, except they weren’t being raped. They never even realized the difference until they found notes that would tell them about their condition, and command them to wake up. Even then, it would often take months until they were ready to discard their fantasy world.
Timmy Clark, a fifteen-year-old boy, was shot in the back of the head execution style for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. He and Damien, a friend of the family, were buying snacks at the grocery store when they were confronted by two armed men who were upset with Damien for allegedly flirting with neighborhood girls. They shot Damien, then offed little Timmy in an effort to disguise their intent.