The edge of his blade crushed through bone and muscle on it’s descent into the Reaper’s back. The creature shrieked, and attempted to turn itself around to face it’s attacker- in vain, as Sev held the hilt tightly in place. It thrashed on the end of his knife while Sev turned to another threat, trigger squeezing to release two .45’s into a pair of other’s that approached him from behind. As they fell, Sev kicked the shish-kebab’d Reaper from the blade, following up with a bullet to the back of the skull as it staggered forward, dropping it to the ground, his own face freckling with the splash-back of blood.
The carnage behind him did nothing to slow Sevrin’s steps, as it all amounted to mere inconvenience on his way to the barn. To Talia. Drenched from the ceaseless downpour, the storm raging above with it’s howling wind and flashes of electricity cutting across the overlapping depths of gray and black of the sky, only seemed to worsen by the minute.
As Rogues gathered into the usual safety of the structure they’d come to call home, Sevrin knew it was the last placed he’d want her to wait out the storm in. The infected multiplied and were scampering desperately towards any shelter, all the while simultaneously driven still to feed on the living. The barn would become a buffet.
Sevrin was permitted entry, stepping over the carcasses of other felled dead at the barn’s threshold, and he stepped inside. Dark oceanic eyes scanned the huddled faces within, looking only for one. "Talia?!“ He yelled over their hushed whisperings of panic, stepping through their numbers to find her. "Talia, where the FUCK are you?!”
TALIA HAS ALWAYS hated storms . and though she was curious about most things that feared her , storms were definitely the exception . such extreme weather events were too loud and violent for girls like her . girls who revelled in sun - dresses and danced barefoot on the grass in summer and though she supposed that such two factors are not mutually exclusive . it was certainly the case for her . and in the basement , where she would be sent after misbehaviour , it always seemed to be storming -- violet raindrops on her windows , harsh winds that could’ve caused the ceiling to cave right through and the merciless hum of the being all lone in the dark . not exactly the fondest memory of her childhood .
and this storm . she never expected it . when she was eight , her father taught her how to read the sky . he had said that words can only ever tell you so much , and you never never know when look to the skies for an answer . he taught her how to analyse shape of the clouds , how to tell a brewing storm from the strength of the breeze , to determine where you were just by looking at the sun . she should’ve expected it . she was taught to predict weather for goodness’ sake ! she should’ve seen it coming . had she seen it coming , maybe she wouldn’t have been so scared . and of course there was the added danger of the undead prying on their brains . but the aydin girl was much more concerned with the thunderous cracks and violent rain .
as soon as it all began , she looked for her friends . jacob , sev . anyone really , a tether to some level of bravery . but everyone had rushed in and they had all pushed her back , further and further into the dark and malodours barn . anxiety gnawed on her mind , she needed sevrin right now , she needed to know he was okay . possible scenes of varying severity flashed across her mind ; sevrin injured , sevrin dead . she couldn’t just sit there all quiet . she tried to push though it , mumbling her excuses , gently shoving shoulders but she never made it more than a few rows . when she had heard his familiar voice though , that was enough momentum .
“ sevrin ! ” she yelled back , apologies spilling out of her lips as she tried to push her way through the crowd . “ excuse me sir , but please move out of the fucking way . ” she hurriedly mumbled to an unfamiliar face as she pushed through the last row . once in the clear , she launched herself in sevrin’s arms . tiny arms desperately trying to envelop all of him . “ i’m so scared , i was so scared . i thought you were ... i don’t know , i thought ... ” she gulped down the fear , tears pricking her eyes as she tightened her arms around him .
GROTESQUE CREATURES of the underworld , characters from mythological stories , imaginary beings of whimsical fiction , yet for some atrocious reason , in some absurd way , they were as real as he was . and it was a nauseating fact to behold . who would’ve guessed that this nightmare would be his reality ? he was a farm - boy , from a town with no less than five - hundred people . simple - minded people , who tended to their animals and harvested their crops and clasped their hands in prayer and gratitude to their almighty creator . he was never even supposed to leave the farm , never supposed to leave his grey - haired , doddery mother . and it was because of his own ruthless and unyielding selfishness that he found himself here . fighting off horrific beasts that were only ever to exist on paper .
he swung his axe at the nearest reaper . the slush of rotten guts splattered across his clothes but with one down three more took its place . and he was swinging left and right , the edge of his blade meeting their dark and emotionless eyes and cutting through their decaying neck and one he had swung so hard it sliced the monster right down the middle of his head , completely unfazed with the splatter of cold liquid across his crimson cheeks .
it was a new skill he had learnt , this frightening , razor - sharp focus . but it had weakened ever since he met people , he needed to look out for them too . and at the corner of his eye , he caught someone in need . sevrin . tobias doesn’t know much about him but you didn’t need to know a lot about someone to help them . “ HEY ! DUCK ! ” tobias exclaimed , making sure he had listened and did as asked before throwing his axe to a reaper who had been coming from sevrin’s side .
( brenton thwaites / cis male / he/him ) . introducing tobias buckley, the host for the deceived. they’ll be thirty one years old, and joined the rogues six months ago. you’ll always see an axe around wherever he is.
𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚁𝙰𝙸𝙽 𝙸𝚂 𝙱𝙻𝙾𝚆𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙸𝙽 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙵𝙰𝙲𝙴
full name : tobias james buckley
nickname : toby ( rare )
age : thirty - one
birthday : august 21st
past residence : farm in kansas
location : with the rogues
past occupation : farmer
current occupation : n/a
moral alignment : lawful good
hogwarts house : gryffindor first , hufflepuff second
trigger warning : alcohol dependance , lots of arguments , mentions of abuse
oh man , even as a kid tobias was emotional . sure it was normal for kids to throw a tantrum or two but tobias felt everything intensely -- love , pain , fear . every feeling was amplified . when he was first born , it had been the night of a bad storm . weather forecast predicted heavy rainfall but on that night it was thundering and hailing and the rain was violent . but tobias managed to cry louder than all of it . his parents barely even remembered that there was a storm going on because their little baby toby , managed to drown it all out .
ever since then , tobias’ emotions always became the buffer between his family and external circumstances -- like he was born with the sole purpose of removing their problems . the way he felt about anything or anyone , how he loved , how he was anxious and scared and afraid , gave everyone a chance to be better . the be tougher for him , to be braver for him . and as he got older , his emotions only raged on . but they managed . they had a systematic way of dealing with it and it reaped a bountiful of benefits .
up until he was eight years old . when he was eight , their farm was hit with another pretty bad storm . much worse than before , crops were ruined , gates seemed to have been shook loose by the wind , trees had fallen down , power was cut and a hole had created a leak in their dining room ceiling . everything that could’ve possibly gone wrong went wrong . but tobias thought it wasn’t that bad , a little water damage ? stick a pail under it , a loose gate ? just close it ! ruined crops ? just plant new ones ! unfortunately , his father did not hold the same brazen attitude he did . he was already buried in a moutain of debt and he was stressed and scared and found peace in the comfort of strangers and at the bottom of beer bottles
him , his mother and his sisters put up for it for a while . but it was obvious his mother had fallen quickly out of love . at night he would stumble in reeking of booze and him and toby’s mother would go at it for hours , they would throw things and smash things and he’d just end up leaving again . and tobias , he was never the heavy sleeper , would tip toe down the staircase and hold his mother in his arms as she cried herself to sleep .
and this went on for years , but the most potent memory of his asshole of a father , was when he was twelve . around two in the morning , tobias heard them downstairs again . arguing and fighting . and they never hurt each other , only the things around them but this time he heard a thud . and he could still remember how his heart fell to his stomach and fear was in his throat . but he got up and he saw his father towering of his mother , crying , apologising profusely . and tobais , a scrawny little twelve year old , went into protector - mode . he shoved his father away and his father , he got sick of it , got annoyed at the little boy poking at his arm and he shoved him away , just a little too hard and in a bad direction . tobias broke his arm that night . and his mother suffered from a concussion . he never saw his father again after that .
that night changed him . he was afraid of so much more but he couldn’t let it show . he was the only ‘ man of the house ’ and as the stereotypical man of the house ( despite their family being rather progressive about gender roles ) he needed to be there for his mother and his sisters . he would skip two days usually of school so that he could do more farm work . they still had to pay his father’s debts and so they couldn’t really hire anyone , so it was just him , his mother and his sisters helping around when they can .
he gave up his dream for that farm . he wanted to be a writer . maybe novels , maybe articles . he loved writing . and he was damn good at it too , his english teacher always said he had the potential to be someone truly great . and more people started to read the school newsletter after he joined the team too ! but the farm . his mother . his sisters . he needed to be there for them , he needed to be what his father failed to be . a good man . a noble man who could help his family . and that realisation , the weight of such duties on his shoulder , it was heavy and it sucked but tobias felt ... fulfilled . like giving something up like that , sacrificing his own dreams for the safety and security of his family , it made him feel like a hero . and he was damn quick to get addicted to it .
as he grew up , the more the feeling , this addiction grew . it was messed up , the way he sought for opportunities to do good only to feel hurt again . but it made him feel like a hero . he’d let people use him , he’d give them ample opportunity to hurt him ( emotionally ) and he’d come out of it feeling broken and deceived and worn out . but he’d realise that it was for their own good , that by carrying pain and anguish , he had saved them from their own . so yeah , you could say he had a hero complex . but the thing about internal complexes , the people who have them don’t often know they have them .
then the thing came . pollination the news people called it . and tobias , he should’ve packed up everything he could need , he should’ve called his sisters to come back to the farm , he should’ve gotten his mother ready , he should’ve been at the farm . but he wasn’t . he was in new york . because he had hired a PI and they had found his father . despite of what he did , how he broke the family , he was still his father . and tobias still loved him . and he just needed answers and closure . but the borders had closed , chaos ensued and everything that held them , society , together , crumbled .
and for a while he was by himself . no way to reach his sisters . or his mother . most nights were consumed with thoughts about them and the anxiety it accompanied . were they alive ? were they okay ? were they still human ? the biggest regret of his life was not being there at the farm on june 29th . and he should’ve been there . but he gave way to his own desires , gave way to his need for closure with his father . and look what happened . he had lost everything in the process . and so he promised himself , or the universe more like , that even though this new world was cruel and ruthless , he was to be good . to accomodate their desires and their needs and never his own . see , exhibit a .
exhibit a . a woman , trying to fight of a cluster of carriers . tobias , watching from a distance , clearly analysing that the woman’s desires to survive and needs a hero . and tobias was happy to provide . he helped her fight them off . he learned his name was bathsheba and he had a younger sister named maggie . and for a while it was the three of them . and tobias , who always felt everything with such a high degree of passion , couldn’t help but just fall in love with bathsheba fischer . and for the whole time with her , he was just a love struck fool . man , he even thought he could marry her . even imagined his proposal and their wedding in his head . she was just so perfect . until she wasn’t .
seven months ago , both maggie and bathsheba left him as they were attacked by a swarm of carriers and they got separated . he managed to run away , calling batsheba and maggie to follow him but they were nowhere to be seen . maybe they had found their own shelter , maybe they were dead . tobias didn’t want to dwell on the latter . even just the thought hurt him . and for a few nights that was all he could think about . over and over again . about how they got separated ? but there was something , a feeling in the pit of his stomach , that maybe they left . left hm alone to rot and die and suffer as one of those creatures . maybe .
but nothing about him has changed since then . he still let people walk over him , accomodate their own needs and wants before his own . this feeling , of doing something selfless , of being what people needed , it was the only thing that made him want to keep living . he wasn’t doing this - surviving thing for himself anymore . people needed him ( who exactly needed him , he’s not exactly sure . he’s kinda just generalising that people overall needed him or someone will need him ) and he was continually going to fight for those people like they were his very own family .
𝙸 𝙲𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝙾𝙵𝙵𝙴𝚁 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙰 𝚆𝙰𝚁𝙼 𝙴𝙼𝙱𝚁𝙰𝙲𝙴
alrighty , personality ! he has a hero - complex ! likes to do stuff for other people , it’s exhilarating to him and it makes him feel like a superhero or smthing .
is very loyal to those around him and gets attached very quickly !
doesn’t really care about himself , would rather see other people thrive and survive .
he’s quick to speak out about any injustice that he sees , he’s not like a coward like my other chara 👀 👀 ( * cough cough * : jack ) and will call out a person’s bs for the greater good
he’s kind of a chameleon . he becomes who people need him to be . and doesn’t really have a true personality . his true personality is that he doesn’t have one . it fluctuates and depends on those around him ??
𝚃𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙵𝙴𝙴𝙻 𝙼𝚈 𝙻𝙾𝚅𝙴
connections ! im fresh out of ideas but i’ll definitely putting up sister connections on the main ! and i would also very much love to brainstorm !!!
TLDR
has a hero - complex and lets everybody walk over him 🙈
Jacob was glad she’d found some food. Beans were a start, and as her question came, he didn’t have time to reply before she began rattling off facts about them. Her enthusiasm brought a smile to his lips and he chuckled quietly as he listened. “That’s actually pretty interesting, I didn’t know that. For a second there I braced myself for something else. My little brother used to say, ‘Beans, beans, they’re good for your heart. The more you eat ‘em, the more you fart,’ and my mom would always yell at him for saying that at the dinner table,” he said, laughing softly and shaking his head. God, he missed Julian.
“People eat beans all sorts of ways around the world, too. Some people like them savory, some like them sweet… but we kinda don’t have the luxury to be picky about it right now,” he added with a roll of his shoulders. Something caught his attention, though, and he walked towards the window will closest to him. “Huh… somebody left a pack of cigarettes here. I’m claiming these, if you don’t mind,” he said, grabbing the packet and counting five cigarettes who’d been there for who knows how long. “Might be able to trade ‘em for something with the people at the safe-zone. Or back at camp,” he shrugged. “I wanna get my hands on some salt. Or like… one damn Reese’s peanut butter cup. I miss chocolate. What about you?”
A BUBBLY LAUGH erupted from her lips at the other’s words . “ and that definitely beats my fact . your brother sounds amazing . i wish i had a brother or a sister . i was an only child you see and our family dinners were always rather quiet ... ” and lonely . but even just the word family was enough to bring forth the memories of her parents and stir the guilt at the pit of her stomach . she wondered where they were , were they even alive ? she didn’t exactly leave on good terms with them . there was so much more she wanted to say . and she always planned on going back , she never thought the chance would be violently ripped from under her .
she cleared her throat , focusing on the words of the other before memories of the past had the chance to drown her . she nodded , plastering on a smile at his question about the cigarettes . she’s never tried smoking but she had certainly read about it , interesting mechanism , intriguing chemicals . but not enough to warrant immediate replication into reality . “ good idea . i don’t doubt nicotine or any kind of anaesthetic is in high demand these days . ” she chuckled at his mention of salt , a little too random for her to be able to hold in a laugh . “ i miss chocolate too ! and ice - cream ! and cake ! ”
..Which way I fly is hell; myself am hell; And in the lowest deep a lower deep, Still threat’ning to devour me, opens wide, To which the hell I suffer seems a heaven. – !
Abruptly diverted from the pages nestled in his hands, his attention was drawn from Milton to the movement outside from between the boards securing his window - someone stood, just barely tall enough for him to see the crown of their dark hair. Annoyance began to poison his mood ( which, to this point had been quite peaceful as he’d carved time from his day to read ), until the chiming bell-like voice that followed replaced it instead with… well, he was sure whatever it was had a name, even if he couldn’t label it himself. ( Maybe he’d ask Bathsheba about it actually, nevermind. )
Pages came together in a hushed sigh as Sevrin closed the book, setting it on the counter for later. Opening the door of the airstream, he found there the sparking blue eyes of Talia Ayden looking up at him, as bright as jewels and as lively as ever. His head tilted to the side, partly curious to know what she had in that infinitely brilliant mind of hers, but also in confusion over what it was about her that compelled him to continue humoring these antics of hers at all.
Knowing the young woman before him well enough by now, he knew that if he were to decline her request of his company, she would either go on her own or find someone else to join her. Both options were unacceptable, as there was no one he trusted with her safety more than himself. ( The fact that her safety was important to him in the first place was a mind-boggling paradox to his nature, yet… here was. Concerned. )
“Where did you have in mind?” He asked, words chased by a surrendering sigh as the question he asked was agreement to her adventure in itself.
IT WASN’T EVEN A CHOICE really , who she wanted to accompany her . it was always going to be sevrin . sure , he was intimidating and a little bit frightening , talia , like the little red riding hood , took far greater interest in the big bad wolf than the elephant . and though the story didn’t exactly end with a happy ending and the moral was rather grim , talia didn’t mind for she was always taught to question the fairytales instead of believing in them . and sevrin was interesting and there was a hidden kindness in his eyes , though it took a while to find , it certainly did not escape the aydin girl —— though she often wondered whether such possibilities were merely a fabrication of her imagination . but she was adamant in believing that there was something good in everyone .
a bright smile immediately broke out across his lips , a sign of bliss so rare to find these days but an expression talia almost always wore —— she was convinced external euphoria would inevitably mimic inner jubilation , though the voice of her cold - hearted and emotionless mother screamed at the back of her mind , that such theories were scientifically impossible . but it was her experiment nonetheless , holding only a hypothesis and reaping nothing as of yet , but she was never one to give up . maybe her smile could even impose one on her companion , now that would be a phenomenon she would pay to see .
at his kind - of agreement , she took a step closer , excitement pulling up her shoulders and tightening her grin . “ just a bit … out there . ” she spoke almost timidly as she nodded her head towards the woods . “ i think i heard some finches last night , though it might’ve been a pine siskin or a house wren . they sound awfully similar . but ! there are definitely birds out there ! ” she spoke with such passion and vitality that one would think she had never seen a bird ever before . “ and i just wanted to take their pictures . ” she grinned , wiggling the disposable camera in her hand .
anjali hated the way her heart pulled towards him , how she couldn’t find it in herself to drop him : despite how much her mind begged her to . it was the smart thing to do , it was the normal thing to do . ( or maybe it was just her way of doing things now , to keep her head screwed on right ) . people always told her she was too easily swayed by emotions , a heart too big for her body . as a kid , she’d be the girl comforting the playground bully when they fell one day , & the one spat on the next . putting aside animosity for a second , just to see somebody smile one more time . fingers racked over her forearms , tightening into a fist as she tried to keep it down , because she could see his guilt from a mile away . he meant it , she knew he did .
lips parted as he moved , & her weight shifted from one leg to the other . each step was a snip at the coil of her resolve . eyes moved to look at her feet for a second , gathering her thoughts that he’d jumbled up at his next words . COULD’VE . maybe . she knows it too , she felt it before they parted ways bitterly at hartly . which came as a surprise to her too : her heart had been so preoccupied by the losses she suffered , that when it gained something , it nearly stopped .
but he hurt her . he hurt her , that he might as well have laid his hands on her . then why couldn’t she just leave ? “ jack . ” at last , her tone softened & she closed the distance between them hesitantly . she could at least give him hope , he deserved that much . “ just … ” give it time . one month , you’d think it’d be enough , but over that month , she hadn’t thought of forgiveness , only of festering anger . she reached for his hands , hoping to ease a bit of his pain , & some of her own . not as tightly as before , but enough to let him know he still stood a chance . “ i’ll forgive you . ” she said as a promise in the future , because she wasn’t ready yet . “ in time . so please don’t cry . i’m not going anywhere . ”
JACK NEVER USED to be like this . ( cowardly , emotional , petrified . ) as a boy , he was brave and independent . his hubristic desires and greed for power and money made him ruthless and barbaric . he was feared and adored , respected and despised . he had everything to his name , there was nothing to fear -- he can’t even conjure a memory of him shedding a tear in the period of his adolescence . he was a king , with a crooked crown and a blunted sword gleaming with iniquity , sitting on a throne built on old money and new vices . but poor leaders are always inevitably served with weak loyalty . and he was exiled . abandoned . and the truth , that no - one ever truly loved him , would be the momentum to his cowardice .
and so , his heart was in knots long before this mistake , ( perhaps he was even born with it ) , inevitably tangled and twisted with chronic loneliness and nauseating grief , jack will forever hold nothing but a gnarly , grotesque looking thing on the left side of his chest . but anjali’s words unravelled him . and it was slightly , just slightly easier to breathe . it wasn’t exactly what be wanted to hear but it was more than what he expected . he heaved a happy sigh and pinched the corner of his eyes with his fingers before his hands rested on his hips -- a smile tugging at the corer of his lips , happiness begging to seep through his heart .
he looked away for second , a little laugh falling from his lips , trying to control the urge to embrace her , to remain -- or at least look -- stoic , calm collected , but he just couldn’t ignore the feeling of euphoric disbelief and exhilarating gratitude that coursed through his veins . and so , as though equipped with wings , his feet brushed the ground as he rushed towards her , wrapping his arms around her frame before burying his face in the crook of her neck . “ i’ll take it . ” he mumbled . “ thank you , thank you . ” he tightened his arms around her ( never wanting to let go ) . “ i’ll wait for you . ”
“ you could have your whole body wrapped around it , ” anjali played with the hilt of the dagger sheathed on her waist , less as a threat & mainly for her own sake , “ but as long as you don’t claim it , that doesn’t mean shit . so petal , i’d suggest setting it back down before you lose that hand . ”
PANIC ROSE IN HER THROAT as she eyed the movement on the hilt of her dagger but she quickly swallowed it down and instead hid behind a facade of feigned perplexity and flashed the other a tight - lipped grin . “ but i am physically claiming it with my hand . so really , by laws of whatever - the - fuck , it’s mine . you snooze you loose old lady . ”
𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 : @sevrinoconnell / 𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 : outside his airstream !
IT WAS RATHER DIFFICULT to find happiness in a world like theirs . in a cruel , lawless world where nothing was more prevalent nor potent than the savagery of mankind’s greatest flaws . but talia , who had been sheltered from even just the mention of anything barbaric , found the change intellectually stimulating . she’s always been consumed with avid curiosity . and she had a very short - lived experience of the country , but what she had seen so far was beautiful . and there was more to see too ! she had so many more questions and nothing could dampen her desire to find answers. but her bravery only extends to that much . and that was where sevrin came in . she headed over to his airstream , heart just beating a little harder than normal , mind already racing at all the possibly ways she could properly and appropriately deliver the question .
but as soon as she saw his figure walk across the windows , all calculations slipped from her mind and careless spontaneity took over . she rushed over and stood on her toes to peek through the window , “ sevrin ! ” she gave an animated little wave of her hand . “ are you busy ? you don’t look busy ! do you want to be busy ? i’ve got a great idea for busyness ! how about a walk ! adventure , is a much more exciting word . ”
“ WELL ! ” talia exclaimed , an ear - to - ear grin across her lips , a picture of pure joviality ( though it’s not quite reaching her eyes ) . “ come on , give us a smile ! ” the brunette encouraged as she brought the camera up to her eye . “ show us those pearly whites ! and say geotrichum candidum ! ”
“Alright… there’s nothing here, except for a broken plastic trash can. I didn’t think there’d be anything, but you never know, with how people pass through. I heard someone left a whole case of money behind once. Remember when money used to be currency?” Jacob asked, sweeping his gaze around the run-down shack one more time in case there was anything at all he’d missed. Some brick sitting the wrong way, or a crack that gave away some kind of secret. “Now my trading currency currency’s seeds, shrooms, and haircuts,” he said, glancing at his present companion.
“We should probably go soon, but what did you find on that side? Anything good?”
A LITTLE LAUGH tumbled from her lips as she listened to her companion , thoughts of how the world changed so quickly invading her mind . even more the reason to capture and preserve as much of it as she could . she had very little taste of freedom and though the world as it was now tore down so many ( though necessary ) boundaries to her freedom , she missed what it used to be . she missed the people she used to have . but those thoughts were pushed away at jacob’s question , she stood up from her crouching position and gave him a smile as she walked over .
“ i found some canned beans ! ” talia answered animatedly , giving it a good shake a she showed it to her friend . “ do you want to hear a fun fact about beans ? ” asked , a big grin on her lips . but she didn’t leave time for the other to answer before . reciting the first fact that came up to her mind . “ in ancient rome, legumes were so esteemed that the four leading families took their names from them ! lentullus -- lentil , piso -- pea , cicero -- chickpea , and fabius -- fava ! fascinating don’t you think !? ”
anjali couldn’t afford to cry … not in a barn full of almost strangers , so she took to tightening her fists : bite her tongue , &move on . disappointment , that’s what she made herself believe she felt , pushing down the bitter , lingering feeling of a knife plunged in her back . maybe she should accept that , deep down , dinah wasn’t the only reason why she left the community maybe it was just time to leave , & that the whole event was just the straw that broke the camel’s back . maybe it wasn’t his fault , he was just being painstakingly human . but she’d opened herself up to him , more than she had around anyone else . the pain of losing a child was something shared between them , the uneasy feeling of helplessness as the ones they cherish most slipped their fingers , like skates on ice . she’d told him what dinah meant to her . so it’s hard to look at him now .
she looked at him pointedly , crossing her arms . I SHOULD’VE LEFT WITH YOU . “ you would’ve regretted it . ” some people were just more acclimated to living in rougher conditions , & some needed the comforting feeling of four walls . & she knew him so much better now ! that she knew he would’ve lived a life , questioning what if . anjali let out a sigh , relieved that she’d told dinah to stay in the barn today , help out with guard duty or whatever . “ no . ” her protective nature over the child simply grew since hartly , & she knew that dinah wasn’t a fan of people . their home was already crowded as it was . “ i’ll let her know , & if she wants to talk , we’ll find you . ”
AT HER COLDNESS , something inside him broke . he was already a broken boy , long before this . even when he was born he was barely breathing , his heart far too probable in just stopping completely . but somehow , for some reason . he lived . and why ? to suffer . as a kid he took everything and now , everything was taken from him . as though he was fate’s nemesis , slowly tortured by painfully plucking at the fragments of his heart , tearing away bits and pieces , the most important pieces , until his identity was obliterated . all that was left was fear . and pain . every other emotion was either rare or indistinguishable .
he absentmindedly took a step closer , his regret being a greater driver of his actions . he was usually afraid , of everything and everyone . but his guilt was too potent and it poisoned him but the antidote was right in front of him . he shook his head , a soft , little laugh falling form his lips . “ i wouldn’t have regretted it . maybe we could’ve even … ” his voice trailed off as pictures of what could’ve happened played out in his mind , laughing , love ? but there was no point in thinking about what could’ve happened —— no point for all that grief . this was the choice he made . and these were the consequences . “ i’m sorry anjali . i am . please , forgive me . you mean ... so much to me . and i can’t lose you too . ” tears pricked the corner of his eyes and his heart thumped wildly in his chest . he wasn’t sure how much more loneliness , how much more grief he could take . he needed her . he needed so many people . but no one ever seems to need him . and rightly so —— everyone that’s ever needed him was gone . he had failed them . all of them . “ please , ” his voice broke , as though sharp fragments of his heart had crawled up and embedded on his throat and constricted it . “ don’t do this to me . ”
𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐀 𝐀𝐘𝐃𝐈𝐍 --- ever heard of curiosity killed the cat ?
( ayca aysin turan / ciswoman / she/her ). introducing talia aydin , the host for the savant. they’ll be twenty - seven years old, and joined the rogues six month ago. you’ll always see a pocket knife around wherever she is.
𝙱𝚄𝚃 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝙸𝙵 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙻𝙳 𝙸𝚂 𝙰 𝙷𝙾𝙿𝙴𝙻𝙴𝚂𝚂 𝙿𝙻𝙰𝙲𝙴
full name : talia kamile aydin
nickname : n/a
name meaning : "lamb", "to bloom"
age : twenty - seven
gender / pronouns : cis woman / she/her
date of birth : september fourth
location of birth : istanbul , turkey
past residence : brooklyn , new york
past occupation : theoretical physicist
current affiliation : the rogues
moral alignment : lawful neutral
family : lucas campos ( fiancé ) , kamile aydin ( mother ) , alperen aydin ( father )
aesthetics :
playlist : on our own - bruno major , cruel world - active child
character inspiration : spencer reid - criminal minds , dana scully - the x files , lydia martin - teen wolf
𝚆𝙴'𝚁𝙴 𝙹𝚄𝚂𝚃 𝚂𝙲𝙰𝚁𝙴𝙳 𝚃𝙾 𝙰𝙳𝙼𝙸𝚃 𝚆𝙴'𝚁𝙴 𝙰𝙻𝙾𝙽𝙴
on september 4 1993 , no one was happier than kamile and alperen aydin . for their baby girl had entered the world . she was welcomed with a torrent of happy tears and zealous proclamations of never - ending love as well as veracious oaths to keep their baby daughter protected . they were never going to let her go .
and as they promised , talia grew up secluded from everything . she was never allowed beyond the boundaries of their house and their gates and fences were far too tall for little talia to even sneak a peek above . and her mother assured her , she wasn’t missing out on anything . but talia couldn’t help but wander , what was that noise ? an ice - cream truck that she’s read about ? or different types of birds and their different types of songs ? or other children , just like her ! who were willing to play tag and hide - and - seek ! she never got the answer
she was an only child and was home - schooled all her life , the burden of her parent’s expectations were particularly potent , especially about .. well , everythiing . they taught her four languages . besides her mother - tongue she was to also learn english , french , german and mandarin chinese . but the only sport dignified enough for the aydins was croquet . and then there was physics ; einstein’s theory of relativity , newton’s laws of motion , the big bang theory and so many more , biology ; natural selection and evolution , epigenetics , hormones and pregnancy and she was even taught about weedy and invasive plants , chemistry , maths and every other subject that was likely to cause the onset of depression in a pre - pubescent teenage girl .
but science , science she found a deep love for . it was interesting and magical even , it captivated her completely and her parents were happy to accomodate to her passion . giving her extra lessons and more posters and talia just couldn’t stop her fervid desire to know . and she rigorously dedicated herself to everything about it . to her it wasn’t about the grades or for the pride of her parents but for herself , for her own mind , to appease her own curiosity . it gave her freedom .
but as she grew older , the house looked smaller and the walls constantly felt like they were closing in . she was suffocating , she would feel claustrophobic in every room and she knew she had to get out of there before she lost her mind . so she snuck out , past their tall and frightening gates , past her cooking father and sleeping mother . as she took that first step , she felt like she had walked through a portal into another universe . there was such beauty , everywhere . and noise ! all kinds of noise , arguments and laughter , car honks and the roar of motorcycle engines . even the air smelt different . there was an aroma of food , new herbs and spices , it truly was an adventure she would never forget .
and on the way back , she had meticulously planned it you see , she was to leave at this time , grab these things , say this excuse and then leave at this exact time . otherwise , hell hath no fury like a mother scorned . but the cruel trickster fate , had different plans . on the way back she met a boy . a tourist , from brooklyn , new york . . he had honey eyes and dark skin and there was a strange new feeling that stirred in her stomach , like the flutter of butterflies or the whirring of a malfunctioning machine . they shook hands and exchanged names and talked for a while . but what stuck to her was where lucas was from , america , he answered , the land of the free . she left him with a smile on her face . despite knowing that her plan had been discarded and there was upcoming consequences to her actions , she couldn’t wipe the grin off her face . partly because of the boy and also because of the prospect of freedom . just a few oceans away , she felt like it was calling to her .
and , as she had predicted . her parents knew and they were enraged . and of course , talia had seen her parents angry before but this was new and alarming manifestation of their insecurities . they lectured her about the dangers of everything , of the world , of strangers , of cars , of air . ** trigger warning : parents being mean ? ** and they sent her to the basement , where it was cold and dark . and the only way that talia got through it all , with dry cheeks and a soaring heart , was because of that particular honey - eyed boy . the basement was not a new punishment . and the dark was an old friend . but what the darkness harboured was a stranger to her . her overactive imagination went haywire whenever she was in the basement -- fabricating monsters and gargoyles , winged - serpents and three - headed snakes . when she was down there , she could never sleep , she couldn’t stop shaking either . ** end trigger warning ** but she held on to the hope that she would meet that honey - eyed boy again and share the freedom he glorified in .
eighteen . she thought it was an age which warranted freedom and trust . but her parents only became more stern and harsh and utterly unyielding in the subject of talia’s freedom . she was to stay at the house , work with her father on his research project . and never leave . she cried about it a lot when she first heard the new guidelines of her existence . but her father explained it to her , her mother had lost one sister to disease , another in a traffic accident and a brother to alcohol . her father’s exact words were , “ she had failed in protecting her siblings but she wasn’t going to fail you . she loves you too much .” and talia understood , the only thing she could really do was accept it .
she worked with her father on his research project , he was a botanist and loved plants far more than the ordinary individual , he was always seeking for new plan species , even promising talia , that had he ever found one , he would name it after his daughter . for a while she was content , happy even but it didn’t last , it was never going to . she sought for something greater than the mundanities of a secluded lifestyle , she sought for love . and once she was curious about something , she wasn’t going to stop till her curiosity was satiated with answers .
at twenty - two , in the middle of the night , she worked up the courage , she stole her parent’s money ( not before leaving them a detailed letter mostly composing of apologies and proclamations of love and just a sentence or two asking them not to look for her ) , carrying nothing but a backpack and knowing absolutely nothing about the world , except from what she’s read , she headed to the airport . she caught a plane , brooklyn , new york . that was all lucas had told her . but that was all she needed . this was far greater than a boy now , this was about liberty .
at twenty - three , she had gotten a job , she had rented out an old and decrepit apartment and she was alone most of the time , but she couldn’t have been happier . she was free . what greater things were there than the liberty to choose , to be who you wanted to be . then love . love found her and wrapped her up . as though bound by the red string of fate , she and lucas found each other . and they grew to trust each other and love each other and three years on , they were engaged .
and as a little present for her , a pre - honeymoon , lucas had arranged for them to go on a roadtrip . first stop , delaware . she had heard about midway speedway park ( for go - karting and mini golf ! ) and jungle jim’s ( a seasonal water park with games ! ) from a co - worker and talia was completely enamoured with the idea of go - karting ! and water - slides ! she didn’t stop talking about it for days . and lucas , who knew his fiancé more than she knew herself , was enamoured with the idea of making her happy .
but as soon as they got there , something changed . like a flip had been switched off and they were hit with darkness . chaos and anarchy ensued and the worst flaws of human nature emerged . people were cruel and merciless and talia , who had been secluded for a great chunk of her life and who was taught to think meticulously and methodically , found it difficult to find the calculations in chaos . and it sent her brain into haywire . * trigger warning : anxiety attacks * she was anxious and panicked and most of the nights were spent with lucas trying to help her breathe . * end trigger warning *
as long as she was with lucas , she could do it , she could keep going . but a few months in this new reality , they were separated . lucas had protected her , begged her to run while he tried to fight for his life . and talia , who was ready to stay , ready to leave earth with the love of her life , ran . and she ran and ran , until she couldn’t breathe anymore , until her legs collapsed from under her , the screams of her soulmate still ringing in her ears . that was when she found the rogues , or rather the rouges found her . and everyday after that , all she could her was her mother’s warning voice , curiosity killed the cat .
but she wasn’t going to give up on lucas . there was a chance he could still be a live . she thought about everything methodically and meticulously , applying principles of science and laws of nature but love , love was an exception -- lucas was an exception . and that night she decided that nothing could stop her from finding him . yes , curiosity killed the cat . but satisfaction brought it back .
𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝙸𝙵 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙻𝙳 𝙸𝚂 𝙰 𝙷𝙾𝙿𝙴𝙻𝙴𝚂𝚂 𝙿𝙻𝙰𝙲𝙴
a kid , actually though . because she was secluded from everything , she is fascinated about everything . she is also very in love with earth , she wants to protect it and capture as much of the old world as possible . so she usually carries around a notebook and a pen , asking people their stories and what their life was . she literally stacked up on disposable cameras and a lot of film when she had walked past it . so she’s taking picture with those too sometimes .
she’s abrasive sometimes . she didn’t have a lot of interactions with other people . and sometimes she says things without thinking , and even though she had some practice , she might still say something insensitive because she didn’t know it was insensitive --- basically , she’s emotionally stupid . and she doesn’t know much about feelings . she feels them and she knows she feels them but its all still quite new to her .
she’s a compliant rogue , she does what she’s asked and abides whatever rules they’ve established . but she’s quite annoying , she calls people out on their stupidity and always kinda like thinks she’s better than everyone . she’s definitely not shy about highlighting people’s mistake and she loves LOOOVES telling people ‘ i told you so ’
she’s very physically weak . she doesn’t have any arm strength and she’s moderately good at running . but yeah , nah . she can’t fight for shit .
𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝚆𝙴'𝚁𝙴 𝙾𝙽 𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙾𝚆𝙽
maybe the rogue who found her all sad and stuff ? and since they helped talia when she was such in a vulnerable state , she really trusts them and confides in them a lot ? and she always keeps them close because she’s scared of them getting hurt or them being separated .
also , i’m sending a wc form to the main but is there anyone who mayaps want to write lucas ?? maybe he survived and found the hartly compound ??? ( of couursee you can change their name and their personality , everything is basically up to you ! )
someone who’s helping her toughen up ????
someone who is annoying but she low - key loves and relies on ?? or vice versa !!
a little sibling / big sibling kind of dynamic !!
umm , idk but definitely lots more !!! i’m one - hundo percent up for brainstorming !!!
TLDR
been sheltered from everything most of her life , got separated with her fiancee , found the rogues , not giving up on finding her fiancee , she’s very annoying and says things without filtering them in her mind first , she’s kinda uptight , loves to show - off what she knows but loves to tell people ‘ i told you so ’ even more XD
connections were easily made today : no one had much of a selection of candidates when it came to picking who you interacted with . the hard part was keeping those friends . they either lost them to this thing , or they turned out to be completely different from who the population thought they were . & unfortunately for anjali , jack was a member of the second category . a small part of her knew that being angry & disappointed in his decision to keep his mouth shut was petty , & childish , but the bigger part of her couldn’t find it in her to see it that way . if it had been her banishment alone , she’s sure she’d be a lot more understanding . she’d’ve known the consequences of her actions , & she’d abide by the sentencing . but , this was about a child who made a mistake . a stupid mistake . they could’ve at least given her a second chance .
but despite it all , she missed him too . she missed everyone in hartly , & missed the safety of the walls . forgiveness would come one day , that she has no doubt , ( she was never good at holding grudges for too long ) , but not today . “ farmer or not , anything would’ve been better than nothing . ” she had fought a losing battle alone , & watched as he stood back & nodded . “ look jasper , if you came here today for forgiveness , i’m afraid you’re shit out of luck … besides , i’m not the one you should be apologizing to . ”
ONE MONTH , THIRTY DAYS , and he’s not even sure how many nights out of those that he stained his pillow with tears . partly because he missed anjali ( and dinah too , she was a good kid ) but also because nights would just fill him such powerful self - loathing . every mistake amalgamating to form mountains of grief and valleys of regrets . they say time heals all wounds but it only seemed to exacerbate his -- poking and prodding at the scars of his past , ripping up the stitches across the fragments of his heart , till everything was hurting and he was bleeding with such raw misery . every day , every night that he’s left alone , was another painful reminder of how truly and devastatingly human he was -- with their capacity to feel and hurt and grieve and ache . despite all this , he felt more like a ghost than human .
but anjali , equipped with such graceful viciousness and wickedly - fast wit , along with a heart that gave him a chance , made him feel human , no , she did much more than that . she made him feel okay . and who ever has the chance to say they felt ‘ okay ’ in an apocalyptic world where the undead ruled the streets ?! but he lost her , another painful loss he has to burden . at her words his head hung lowly , mind heavy with guilt . a heavy sigh tumbling from his lips . jasper . he hadn’t been called that for a long time but he just wanted her to keep talking , not really caring what she said -- only wanting to hear her voice . she could’ve insulted him all day long and jack would’ve slept with a smile on his face . “ i know . i ... i should’ve left with you ... ” he mumbled , words of self - revelation more for himself than to her . he brought his head up , scanning the grounds , for a familiar face . “ where is she ? can you ... can you take me to her ? ”
“Want one?“ Sevrin offered, tilting the open box of cigarettes he held in his companion’s direction. The mild mannered man at his side was not the usual sort of company that Sev enjoyed, but he found Jack to be an exception. Being around him was calming, in a way - his shoulders relaxed just that much more, and the conversation came easily. Jack allowed for the wild, disarranged thoughts that wandered through Sevrin’s own head, processed in a way only a killer could - and brought to them another perspective. Often, one he didn’t quite understand, or struggled to genuinely empathize with, but nonetheless saw the value in.
"You know, it doesn’t feel the same,” Sev started, waiting for the man to decide on the smoke or not as they sat around one of the camp’s fires, dusk approaching. “I thought it would. But it’s almost like the Reapers don’t even count. The humanity’s gone, you know? It just feels like… stepping on a roach. Necessary, but eh.. boring.”
DUSK WAS EASILY HIS LEAST FAVOURITE time of day , the dark violet tinge of the sky , ruby red streaks and clouds just a little to ominous for the man . such scenes were enough to evoke a quiet fear within him . one that more often than not reminded him that this very well might have been his last day . he much preferred mornings , though the birds don’t sing anymore and the sun shines a little dimmer , to the stoneshire man , it was far less frightening than the gradual enveloping of darkness that dusk displayed . and to be with severin nonetheless ! though he was equipped with a peculiar sort of disposition and broadened jack’s perspective of things ( not the mention helped with expunging his cowardice part of his nature ) , he was still rather scary .
he shook his head at the offer of cigarettes , stuffing his hands in his pockets and tucking his chin inside the collar of his jacket . “ interesting deposition . though i didn’t expect anything less from you . ” severin was a trained killer after all , desensitised to all human emotion and just a tad bit mad . but he was something that jack could never be -- brave . lionhearted , intrepid , heroic even ( had he developed some ability to empathise ) and for that , the stoneshire man respected him , valued him as company ( he had so very little of those nowadays ) . “ perhaps all this boredom is good for you . as long as you don’t go seeking ways to appease it of course . ”
