This might just be a personal life thing, but I have to share it somewhere. This is a bit of a long read and I often have a hard time getting to the point, so I apologize.
So I’ve been in Martial Arts, more specifically Taekwondo, for about ten years now. I’m a brown belt and I like to think I’m pretty good, because I’ve had great support from my instructors and other students.
One of my instructors is my friend’s aunt. This friend of mine is a red belt and she’s amazing at what she does. But I’ve definitely noticed something,
I’ve noticed that she tends to go a little harder on the girls in class. I don’t exactly mean pushing them harder, but I mean cutting the boys a little too much slack.
I have another friend in this class. She’s a black belt and her mother is another one of the instructors, so obviously she’s also really good. But I’ve noticed the same with this other instructor; she’s much easier on the guys in the class.
Before you start to think I’m just complaining, please listen.
So we often play games toward the end of class, and sometimes we play Tic Toc Toe. Basically one team is X, the other team is O (because that’s how the game works). One person has to grab an X or an O and run to the board to place is down in the correct spot (again, basic rules).
The other night it was boys vs girls, which we often do in games. At the end of the second round, a blue belt boy, had accidentally placed his O in the wrong spot. Typical mistake, it happens, so we all laughed it off because it was funny. But what set off some alarms in my head was one of the instructors saying something about him “being tired from the work we had done that night.” Now keep that in mind.
Another time we were playing a game, which I don’t know the name of. But my first time around, I slipped up and made a mistake. Again, it happens. But what REALLY peeved me is her saying that “I tried to cheat” and “I’m not even trying.” She also tried to pass it off as something funny, but it seriously pissed me off.
But Sophie, what’s the big deal?
When the boy (I say that because I don’t want to share their names) made a mistake, she dismissed it, saying he was only tired from class. But when I tried to tell her that I was also tired after the work we did in class and I did not mean to slip up, she says it doesn’t matter, that I need to try harder.
Basically, the instructors treat the girls like we’re a burden to teach, like an inconvenience. Meanwhile, the guys are often let off the hook and treated like they’re fragile.
Since our school is run by mostly women, we’ve faced misogyny from other schools before. But I’m definitely seeing it in our own female instructors and it’s actually getting ridiculous.
Maybe I’m being dramatic, but the other girls in my class have noticed the same thing.
We tried to talk to them about an older black belt male who often comes to our classes and how we noticed his misogynistic behavior (having no respect for my friend, a black belt, just because she’s a “lower rank”). And guess what? WE got in trouble for “disrespect.” WE were the ones who were yelled at for speaking up about our concerns. All because “he’s a black belt.”
I don’t have much else to say, I just wanted to share this somewhere. Thank you for reading and again, I apologize if it was too long.
