inspired by ‘daylight’ by david kushner
cw. | angst, mild nsfw content
being friends with the guys was both a blessing and a curse. on one hand, they were your protectors, and they were pretty fierce about it. they were also fantastic company. there was never a moment where you weren’t laughing.
on the other hand, there was kenny mccormick.
a pair of hands came down on your shoulders, kenny’s grinning face appearing next to you. you grimaced, rolling your eyes, and put a bookmark into the textbook you’d been taking notes from. he slid into the booth beside you, eyes lighting up at he looked at you, then to stan and kyle.
“you guys will never believe whose house i just came from,” the blonde blurted excitedly. you felt as though someone had just twisted a knife in your chest, a sour taste in your mouth.
“whose house?” stan drawled with a roll of his eyes, kyle’s face growing bored as he turned his attention from his textbook to kenny. the blonde puffed out his chest, smile bright and eyes shining. you huffed and reopened your textbook, hand working to type your notes on your laptop.
“heidi turner. she’s been one of the greatest so far,” he boasted. kyle sighed and looked back down at his schoolwork, one hand working to type out an essay while the other flipped pages. you envied his incredible multitasking skills.
“kenny, i love you, bro. i really do. but maybe you should probably lay off the whole sleeping around thing. your body count’s almost as high as your age,” kyle mumbled distractedly. stan nodded in agreement and you stayed in your gloomy silence.
“but it’s fun, kyle. i get to have all these fun experiences so i’m like a god when i finally settle down.” you rolled your eyes, letting out a nearly silent sigh. this caught kenny’s attention, his eyes snapping to you with a frown on his face.
“what do you think, y/n? as a virgin with no experience, wouldn’t you rather spend the rest of your life with someone that knows what they’re doing?” he asked. your head popped up, eyes narrowing at the blonde next to you.
“first of all, kenny, i’m not a virgin. i haven’t been for months. you’d know if you got your head out of your ass. second of all, i’d prefer settling down with a man who’s more interested in me specifically than gloating about his hookups,” you deadpanned, then turned your eyes back to your work. kyle nodded along in agreement.
“oh, shut up, kyle. i know for sure you’re a virgin,” kenny grumbled, slumping in the booth. the red head shook his head with a smug grin, finally making eye contact with kenny once again.
“i lost it the same day as y/n. you can piece it together yourself. i know you’re smart enough.”
you couldn’t help the snort you let out, though your heart dropped the second the words left kyle’s mouth. as much as kenny’s escapades hurt you, you didn’t want him to think lowly of you for sleeping with his best friend.
“you fucked y/n?” he asked, in such a quiet voice you weren’t sure if anyone heard it besides you. kyle’s smile turned sarcastic as he offered up a nod.
“there you go, buddy. i told you you were smart!”
your mouth was dry. you could barely meet kenny’s eye as you also nodded, worrying your lip between your teeth. kyle caught your eye, giving you a smile of encouragement and a pat to the hand.
if you hadn’t been so caught in the moment, you would’ve seen the way kenny’s entire face fell before he stormed out of the cafe, throwing some excuse about karen over his shoulder.
“he acts like a simple business transaction is the end of the world,” stan muttered in a monotone, fingers to his lips as he squinted at the book in front of him. you sighed with a roll of your eyes and a nod of your head, kyle murmuring his agreement. you couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.
three in the morning was not a pleasant time for a visitor. you were already irritable from the hours of studying you’d completed that day and from the lack of sleep over the past few weeks in preparation for exams. the icing on the cake was kenny swaying on your front porch, hiccuping and covered in bruises and cuts. you raised an eyebrow at him, but didn’t comment, letting him inside your apartment.
“you know where the bathroom is. i’ll meet you there,” you murmured, then trudged off to the kitchen for a glass of water and a sandwich. you carried both up with you, setting them on your desk before joining kenny in the bathroom. he was bent over on top of your toilet seat cover, head in his hands and elbows resting against his knees. he barely glanced at you when you came in, even as you kneeled in front of him and settled a hand against his knee.
“kenny, look at me,” you whispered, eyebrows drawn up in the middle, frown against your lips. he finally managed to bring his gaze to meet yours, letting his hands fall from his face, leaving his teary eyes and quivering lips exposed to you. you sighed and stood completely up, pulling him into a tight hug, his head buried in your stomach. you raked your fingers through his hair, taking a deep breath to settle the butterflies fluttering in your stomach and the ache thudding in your chest.
“you’re okay, ken,” you mumbled, eyes flitting up to the ceiling to push back the tears. kenny rarely ever cried, and when he did, it was so upsetting that you couldn’t help but do so yourself. maybe it was the love you had for him or the pitiful wails he let out. either way, it hurt you just as much as it hurt him.
“i got into a fight with kyle,” he sobbed into your torso, arms circled around your waist and hands gripping the back of your shirt. “i got drunk and showed up at his house. a-and i started yelling at him and i punched him. i’m such a fuck up, y/n. i’m so sorry.”
you sighed and pushed him back by his shoulders, a hand under his chin keeping his glossy eyes on yours.
“you’re not a fuck up, kenny. people make mistakes. you just have to learn from them.” he sniffled grossly as he nodded, wiping the tears from his face with a frown.
“thank you. i’m sorry.” you offered him a kind smile and pulled a bundle of cotton balls and rubbing alcohol from the cabinet in your bathroom.
once you’d finished cleaning all the small cuts scattered across his face, you fed him the sandwich and watched as he drank the water you’d provided. all was done in a comfortable silence, kenny’s eyes downcast all the while, sniffling occasionally. then you were sat on the edge of your bed whilst kenny lay beneath the comforter, eyes locked and your hand stroking his hair.
“it’ll be alright, ken. maybe not now, but it will be,” you hummed. he hesitated before he nodded, offering a shaky smile.
“thank you, y/n,” he whispered. you hummed in response, then pressed a kiss to the top of his head and made your way to the couch.
being friends with kenny was a torturous nightmare.
life had resumed as it normally would. you, kyle, and stan were frantically studying for your exams, and kenny was sleeping with another girl almost every night. he still came to brag about it and still was shut down about every single one.
you were growing more angry with every girl he gloated about. you knew that eventually you’d end up blowing up and ruining your friendship. it was one of your greatest fears, but at this point, he was doing more damage than you could handle.
“i can’t do this, guys,” you sighed as you settled into the diner booth. kyle and stan were munching away on the cheese fries they’d ordered for the table. you popped one into your mouth, sighing through your nose.
“he’s honestly getting a bit overzealous with the whole thing,” stan grumbled, kyle humming in agreement.
“honestly, y/n, why don’t you just tell kenny? i mean, what could go wrong?” kyle murmured. you were opening your mouth to respond as a chipper kenny slid into the seat beside you, tossing an arm over your shoulder.
“tell me what?” he asked, bright grin on his face. your cheeks reddened, butterflies swarming in your stomach, arms crossing over your chest and scowl forming on your lips.
“y/n’s a milk before cereal person,” stan responded nonchalantly, pushing the tray of fries towards kenny. the blonde made quick work of stuffing his face with them, seemingly completely forgetting the topic of conversation as the rest of you discussed your exams.
“so what’s really going on?” kenny spoke as the conversation died down. stan and kyle both turned their attention to you, kenny glancing at you out of the corner of his eye as he finished up the food.
“oh, you know, nothing much. just harboring deep romantic feelings for you,” you stated. you tried to be as nonchalant as stan had been, but your voice shook as you spoke and you refused to look at kenny. his entire body stiffened, head snapping your way, and you wanted to die. your eyes were wide on kyle’s, both he and stan stilled with shock.
“what?” kenny asked, his voice small and body unmoving. you cleared your throat, worrying your lip between your teeth, fingers dancing atop the diner table. kyle caught your fingers in his, stan giving an encouraging nod.
“i’m in love with you, kenny. i have been for a while,” you started, stealing a glance at kenny’s shocked face. “i’m not expecting you to return my feelings. please stop talking about your sexual experiences around me. it’s causing me a lot of hurt. that’s all i ask of you.”
kenny was silent for a long time, and tears were welling in your eyes. you felt your heart crumbling in your chest, and the desire to leave the situation became too much to bear. you stood up as far as you could in the booth, grabbing your phone and wallet, and climbed over kenny to escape. he caught your wrist, and you tore it away, walking away with a swiftness.
“what are you doing, bozo? fucking chase her!” kyle snapped. kenny gulped down the lump in his throat and jogged after you, catching you by your wrist again just as you stepped out of the restaurant. he tugged you into a side alley, far from the view of other people in a desperate attempt to keep your privacy intact.
“y/n, wait,” he spoke through gasps. your heart leapt to your throat, looking at him through teary eyes. his face fell upon seeing the sadness on yours, one hand rising to cup your face.
“i’m sorry,” he whispered. you shook your head, sniffling and blinking away your tears.
“it’s fine, kenny. let me go,” you murmured back. he shook his head vigorously, eyebrows furrowed frustratedly.
“no, y/n, it’s not fucking fine. i’ve spent years sleeping around, wasting my life on women i don’t care about, because of you. i’ve tried so hard to find a girl that reminds me of you because you never could give me the time of day. goddammit, i fucking love you, y/n!”
you were winded, frozen, eyes wide and tears falling. your heart thudded away in your chest, thundering in your ears and turning your face pink. then you were laughing, fist gripping kenny’s hoodie for dear life, head tipped back.
“we’re both so stupid,” you wheezed. then you grabbed kenny by the back of the neck and pulled him to you, kissing him with all the passion you held in your body. one of his arms fell around your waist, the other cradling the side of your face. the butterflies in your stomach were swarming again, warmth spreading through your body, goosebumps forming everywhere his hands touched.
“be my girlfriend,” he whispered between kisses, lips moving against yours with a hunger he’d never felt before.
“in a heartbeat,” you gasped as his lips trailed across your jaw and down the column of your throat. your back fell flat against the wall behind you, kenny’s rough fingertips drawing your leg around his hip.
“i’m gonna make love to you right here in this alley. you’re mine.”
by the time you’d gotten back to the diner booth, your hair was a mess and your collarbone was covered in hickeys. kenny was no better, a dopey smile on his face, mysterious stains spotting his hoodie. stan and kyle took one look at your panting bodies and let out matching sighs of irritation.
“you’re so fucking gross, guys. really? in public?”
“i mean, i’d do it too, but still. we’re supposed to be having a nice dinner right now.”
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