i like hot moms

the big laugh

[soyumyumyummy]

my penis is like santa claus, i don't need to see it, i just need to believe in it UwU

[soyumyumyummy]

feelings are like your mother's breasts, you know they're there, but they're better left unfelt.

[soyumyumyummy]

yk you can use your tears as a lubricant to masturbate?

[soyumyumyummy]

Visit Original Link

[soyumyumyummy]

Am i okay?

no mf i'm fucking hungry

[soyumyumyummy]

I don't like to waste water, that's why I shower once a week and drink beer instead of water. 

[soyumyumyummy]

I am a pretty transparent guy, people can look right through me, i guess that's why girls don't notice me. 

[soyumyumyummy]

pick up line -

you're hotter than the bottom of my laptop

[soyumyumyummy]

I like to always think one step ahead, like a carpenter building stairs.