[pundeserving]

Everyone on 4/13, crawling out of their secret homestuck bunkers,

[dragon-in-a-fez]

right so last week @mothinthegutter asked me how my washing machine tried to murder me, so here we go.

scene: it's 2022. my ex and I have just moved into our new house. we brought our washing machine with us, and I've just finished hooking it up. I haven't pushed it all the way in under the counter yet, because I want to make sure none of the plumbing is leaking. so I put some clothes in and start a wash. a few minutes later I'm squeezing past it to get to the coffee maker, and I put my hand down on the top of the washing machine and hey, ow, what the fuck

now, I've been electrocuted enough times to know it when it's happening. I grab my multimeter and sure enough the entire outer casing of the washing machine is live with 120 volts. okay so maybe I won't touch that.

except, here's another thing I wasn't counting on: the load in the machine is also unbalanced. and the spin cycle is about to start.

oh, and the only way out of the kitchen is on the other side of the thing.

so now, I am trapped in a corner with an electrified washing machine vibrating slowly in my direction.

panic sets in. definitely the weirdest kind of panic I've ever felt. also the realisation that, if this is how I die, no one will be surprised. I consider my options carefully and decide the only way out is to parkour over the counters. given that I have no parkour skills whatsoever, this ends up looking more like lying prone on the counter, belly sliding around the corner, and then falling onto the floor on my face.

I'm alive. I'm free. I call the washing machine manufacturer and report the weirdest problem their repair team has ever heard of.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

yeah. and so am I

[shwarmadillo]

oh how the turns have tables

[increasingpanic-deactivated2024]

[shello-hi]

ignore my subpar editing skills. i felt like this was a necessary edition. they are transmasc transfem solidarity

[shinosarna]

[columboscreens]

[eyesonjupiter]

Found that over at mastodon

[reallyreallyreallytrying]

nuclear power is impressive until you get up to why. "we use the most precisely engineered machinery ever created to split atoms to release energy" oh yeah how come? "boil water to turn a fan" get the fuck out

[darinaethelaianprophet]

The power of atom turns out to be, yet again, the power of steam

[kendoola]

[thedreamthieves]

283,000 likes………giant meteor strike the earth rn holy shit. oh my god.

[insomniac-arrest]

"maybe it's not your pussy" is such a funny phrase and also correct. People wonder why chores are so hard and it's like, friends we used to have a whole intergenerational team on this and now Grandma is locked in a beige box. Cooking is hard.

[sensiblereblogifposts]

Reblog the problem is capitalism and not your pussy

[whenthewallfell]

these two are completely unhinged and i love that for them

[tgirl-thucydides]

Jesus fucking christ, dude

[tgirl-thucydides]

Imagine ur the Republican CEO of IBM excited for a big tax cut under the new administration and they invite you in as economic advisor so you end up spending two years of your life desperately playing therapist to try to unlock why your boss is so fucking weird about everything

[rennerei]

...❤

[slipstreamborne]

This YouTube comment had me leaning hands braced on knees like that person who had to take their shirt off to process Destiel becoming canon.

[redstonedust]

phenomenom thats been bothering me that i could only express via an mspaint reverse boomer comic

[hobohobgoblim]

[existennialmemes]

Listen, if a Bad President can come in and take away our rights and we're dependent on a Good President replacing them in four years to give us back our rights, then we do not have any rights.

If politicians can take or distribute them, then they're not "inalienable" and they're not "rights."

We don't have inalienable rights we have conditional privileges, divvied out according to the whims of whoever currently holds the reins.

And if we want to have actual rights, then we must build a system in which no one has the power to take them away to begin with.

[aiiaiiiyo]

“Belka” and “Strelka”, Soviet space dogs after landing. USSR, 1960. [1800x1295] Check this blog!

[omgellendean]

The amount of people in the notes to this post (and any other space dogs related content) being surprised that Belka and Strelka or some other “dogmonaut” survived starts to concern me. Surely you guys know that most of the space dogs survived their journeys and went on with their doggy lives? Certainly you understand that getting the living creatures into the space and safely bringing them back was the point in these experiments? Like, you all get that these dogs were sent into space as part of the programme aimed at safely getting a human cosmonaut there, and Soviets weren’t just launching puppies to their deaths for the fun of it? You don’t just baselessly extrapolate Laika’s fate on all of them, right? Right?

…

Anyway, in case you get worried or upset looking at the space dogs’ photos, please know that most of the space dogs survived their journeys and went on with their doggy lives. They were sent into space as part of the programme aimed at safely getting a human cosmonaut there. Getting the living creatures into the space and safely bringing them back was the point in these experiments. Belka and Strelka definitely survived their flight, Strelka had puppies (one was gifted to JFK), and they both lived well into the old age.

[sylvia-on-the-run]

i forget her actual name(it translates to little star) but the last of the dog cosmonauts before gagarins flight ended up being adopted by gagarin and his wife and he often spoke about being grateful for her contribution

[zuxigo]

That would be Zvozdochka. She was also named by Yuri Gagarin. Here’s a picture of her with her friends sourced from a Russia Beyond article that manages to misidentify all 4 dogs (correct labels added to bottom of photo added by me)

[sylvia-on-the-run]

yesss thank you

[sharpedgedfool]