Untitled

[sparrowconspiracy]

Briskthames,

Sometimes I feel like my entire life is a conspiracy, which does mean it doesn't get boring very easily. I don't know about that whole flat earth or moon landing thing though, in theory plausible but maybe just in theory. My brain likes science too much to just want to believe anything and everything.

But then again magic kind of makes anything possible so moon landing maybe, the earth being flat though? I don't think so.

But you don't like conspiracy theories, huh? Why not? I mean I'm not judging I'm just curious as to why. The entertainment value alone is pretty high with some of them. Like those people who think everyone is secretly a lizard person if they're powerful. I'm not sure why lizard person was the way to go there, what it is about lizards specifically that someone decided was definitely what rich people have to be?

I mean if that one was true it would be kind of funny. I'm just picturing giant heat lamps and mansions full of sand.

- Sparrow

@briskthames

[briskthames]

Sparrowconspiracy,

My brain also likes science. Far too much to buy into some outlandish theories in general. It's not that I hate them exactly, but I think they're annoying in the ways they can make people buy into them so much that they lose any sort of common sense.

The lizard one is fairly funny, that's true. But they can get crazy and disturbing health wise... or god the one with birds not being real or something? We have eyes and we can see them. Actually more than eyes we have all of our senses. And we have the ability to prove that they're real.

I don't know. I just might not be geared towards conspiracies on the whole. But there are some funnier ones to read about I guess. What else do you find entertaining? I've noted the lizard people so I won't possibly forget about that.

Sincerely, briskthames

[sparrowconspiracy]

Briskthames,

Common sense was probably questionable before that point, but that does make people interesting. Unless they're so determined about it that they're exhausting, then it's only fun to annoy them. Not much of a sense of humor in most cases though.

Technically lizard people do exist, I think. But that might be insulting to dragons? I don't actually know.

Senses can be deceived though, especially with magic; I don't think some things are very plausible. I might not have a few years ago but now, yeah.

People, mostly. That was my main reason for doing this in the first place. I'm not really one of those looking for some relationship with someone I know just from a screen types but you're bound to meet some interesting people anyway?

- Sparrow

@briskthames

[spacesuitmocha]

~SpaceConspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I think it's some law of the universe that people require coffee to exist, I definitely know a couple who would not be able to function without it making up at least half of their bloodstream everyday.

Then you get to go the other way though and without the superficial stuff you get over sharing, which in some cases can be very funny and in some cases you at least have the option to shut the window and scrub your browser to escape the horrors you have witnessed. Unless you're into witnessing the horrors, also valid.

No, not me personally. But it does seem like something that happens an awful lot around here. Demons, sludge monsters, whatever else; sometimes I think the locals just get bored or they have some kind of contract with Olympus gym to cause enough chaos where people renew their memberships to work on their cardio for monster evasion after.

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[spacesuitmocha]

Sparrow,

I think in most realms coffee needs to exist. Isn't there like a whole book series about fantasy coffee cafes?

Yeah, people do get bold with being a faceless name. I'm wondering if anyone's gone rogue with power. Just started doing whatever they want because they're not tied to anything. Can't say I've made online friends with too many horror sharers, I mean sure there's a few terrible posts that get tossed around if you end up on the bad side of Tik Tok or other social media. The whole 'I had to witness this so you do also' thing.

Lol I guess you're right. That clown shit was wild the other night. Some people ran right at it which you know, props to them for lacking self preservation enough to be a hero.

That's a good thought, I wonder who really profits off of all of this? Construction is always in business, therapists, gyms, kind of the town's economic revitalizing moneymaker.

-SM

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I have no idea.

I'm sure they have, who really knows if anyone is honest or not? You could make up an entire identity and then what do you do if the other person likes that identity? Then you're stuck.

On the other side of it yeah, you can just be too honest and I guess see how people really feel about things.

Yeah I don't know where that one came from, a different brand of absolutely insane from the usual. Watching people pick a fight with a giant evil clown is more interesting than the Acorn Drop probably, no man-eating squirrels or whatever.

You know half the town economy works on cleaning up the mess, doesn't look as good on that tourist brochures though. Bet you could spin it with the right marketing though with magical disaster survival training or something.

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[spacesuitmocha]

@sparrowconspiracy

I mean, you'd have to be pretty cruel to lie during this whole thing, I'd think. Some people are out here being genuinely vulnerable. Like being emotionally catfished.

Man-eating squirrels would be honestly terrifying, they're way too fast. Our only hope would have to be the animal talent fairies in the Hollow.

Hey, maybe they need to corner the market on disaster survival and rebuilding, send out consultants to magical disasters. Wonder if there's other magic towns that have the same dream issues.

-SM

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

That's the hard part, isn't it? Be too honest and if people don't respond well to it and you're just left with that, be too careful and people are going to claim you're not being honest enough. People are complicated.

There is something much more unsettling about small animals, this is true. I'd take a bear over a bunch of angry squirrels.

I don't think there are many other magic towns, that's supposed to be the selling point of this place, right?

Future business plan I guess; disaster related business model. Going to have to start developing squirrel nets or something, corner that untapped market.

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[sparrowconspiracy]

Vitrealissour,

Name conversations from someone named after a moth weren't on my bingo card today but sure, yeah. And you're right, I've heard it as often as I expected to. My name has nothing to do with birds though to be honest.

Most of those I end up being a problem so varying degrees of annoying, but probably not untrue. I guess I am a problem and the dreams just like to remind me of that.

I agree with you on the regency thing, it was pretty boring from where I was at in it. I missed a lot of the ones I hear about though, I think it's unfortunate the most exciting one I went through was probably the theme park one and that's kind of sad. The camp one barely counts because I didn't even get any interesting monster encounters unfortunately.

I wouldn't have thought of these letters as competing for love but now that you've said it it's very funny to me; it's like the digital version of a reality TV show and now I want to see who gets ghosted and kicked off the metaphorical island.

How do you even win a competition like that?

- Sparrow

[vitrealissour]

Sparrow,

Dare I ask what you mean by ending up a problem? I mean, I can also be called a problem in some contexts, so I don't blame you.

It really is just like... Love Island the letter edition. I don't know I haven't actually seen it to be honest. I think you win by pretending to be the most charming person ever or having the most followers... though they don't exactly help you hear. I think we win by just being authentic and attracting exactly the energy we want and not being forced into social niceties and keeping up a ruse with someone we don't even like.

I don't think I'd say half the things I have if anyone knew who I was typing all this. Or if I was being televised and edited to look like a horny narcissist.

What're your thoughts on winning this thing?

VS

[sparrowconspiracy]

Vitrealissour,

It's not always on purpose, but what can I say? I'm talented like that.

I can safely say I have only the vaguest sense of what Love Island is so I'll have to take your word on that one.

Not surprised though, most reality tv does tend to be very thinly veiled voluntary torture for the sake of ego or whatever prize is involved. Which isn't great to say since some of it is interesting and that probably doesn't say much about me as a person.

Not sure what to think about someone trying to attract energy like mine, that's equal parts amusing and awkward. Flattering I guess.

Really? So is that the point? You don't plan on anybody knowing who you are at the end of this? Interesting.

Half the town is probably some variety of horny narcissist though.

I can't say I'm not curious about a few people I've talked to but who knows.

- Sparrow

@vitrealissour

[criticalable]

Sparrowconspiracy x Criticalable

[criticalable]

Dear Sparrow,

Was it the goat that's on twitter? Or another goat? I wouldn't be surprised if there was more than one.

I guess so, yeah. We could already be friends and not know it, or be living right next to each other. Though hopefully the stakes aren't too high? I don't really see what could go wrong about this.

Sincerely, Criticalable

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

Think so, unless there's some herd of self aware goats in town. Which there may be, that might be the least surprising possibility.

Potentially, I think anyone who knows me would clock half of the absurd things I say so fast though so probably not.

You're going to the ball? I guess we'll find out then?

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[spacesuitmocha]

~SpaceConspiracy

[spacesuitmocha]

Sparrow,

I think in most realms coffee needs to exist. Isn't there like a whole book series about fantasy coffee cafes?

Yeah, people do get bold with being a faceless name. I'm wondering if anyone's gone rogue with power. Just started doing whatever they want because they're not tied to anything. Can't say I've made online friends with too many horror sharers, I mean sure there's a few terrible posts that get tossed around if you end up on the bad side of Tik Tok or other social media. The whole 'I had to witness this so you do also' thing.

Lol I guess you're right. That clown shit was wild the other night. Some people ran right at it which you know, props to them for lacking self preservation enough to be a hero.

That's a good thought, I wonder who really profits off of all of this? Construction is always in business, therapists, gyms, kind of the town's economic revitalizing moneymaker.

-SM

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I have no idea.

I'm sure they have, who really knows if anyone is honest or not? You could make up an entire identity and then what do you do if the other person likes that identity? Then you're stuck.

On the other side of it yeah, you can just be too honest and I guess see how people really feel about things.

Yeah I don't know where that one came from, a different brand of absolutely insane from the usual. Watching people pick a fight with a giant evil clown is more interesting than the Acorn Drop probably, no man-eating squirrels or whatever.

You know half the town economy works on cleaning up the mess, doesn't look as good on that tourist brochures though. Bet you could spin it with the right marketing though with magical disaster survival training or something.

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[criticalable]

Sparrowconspiracy x Criticalable

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

Around here I wouldn't be surprised if the birds had a union or were plotting to overthrow the town. That really just seems like something that would happen on a random Tuesday.

Sci-fi is probably my favorite, doesn't really matter if it's some of the newer stuff or the older because Godzilla movies are hilarious to watch, and action movies are good to as long as it's not the guy has to go take over a small country because his wife got kidnapped version, and I'm going to watch something like that I would rather watch the cliche superhero movies or fantasy stuff I guess.

I think the only type of movie I just don't really know what to do with are romance movies and I usually fall asleep during those and that's not really the best look when you're trying to watch a movie with someone.

What about you?

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[criticalable]

Dear Sparrow,

Sci-fi is fun! The stuff they can do with effects is really impressive. I really like the superhero movies too, I like knowing that the good guys are most likely gonna win. Oh, and I really liked those Pirate movies!

I haven't really gotten into romance, but I know there's some classics that people really love. I think I just like movies with slightly higher stakes, compared to the "normal people living normal lives" kind of movies.

Sincerely, Criticalable

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

I don't know what counts as normal lives, I think that's subjective and even more around here, it's never dull. Pretty sure I saw somebody arguing with a goat outside Hatter's a while back.

Guess it's not surprising here, but the normality bar is pretty flexible.

So is talking to random strangers online like this higher stakes since they could be someone living down the street?

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[spacesuitmocha]

~SpaceConspiracy

[spacesuitmocha]

Sparrow,

That is true. I'm pretty sure that coffee shop has stood the test of time.

Valid. I get making friends online. It's easier when you don't have all the superficial stuff clouding your judgement I guess.

Hey, you know, you might just be having a conversation right now.

Do you often summon monsters or something? Can't say I've done that before and I've done a few things.

-MK

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I think it's some law of the universe that people require coffee to exist, I definitely know a couple who would not be able to function without it making up at least half of their bloodstream everyday.

Then you get to go the other way though and without the superficial stuff you get over sharing, which in some cases can be very funny and in some cases you at least have the option to shut the window and scrub your browser to escape the horrors you have witnessed. Unless you're into witnessing the horrors, also valid.

No, not me personally. But it does seem like something that happens an awful lot around here. Demons, sludge monsters, whatever else; sometimes I think the locals just get bored or they have some kind of contract with Olympus gym to cause enough chaos where people renew their memberships to work on their cardio for monster evasion after.

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[criticalable]

Sparrowconspiracy x Criticalable

[criticalable]

Dear Sparrow,

Bird seed factories… seems plausible. They definitely know where to find all the food around town, why wouldn’t they go big?

Movies and hanging out sounds like a fun time! What kind of movies do you like? I agree, you gotta lean in to what the other person likes to do.

Sincerely,

Criticalable

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

Around here I wouldn't be surprised if the birds had a union or were plotting to overthrow the town. That really just seems like something that would happen on a random Tuesday.

Sci-fi is probably my favorite, doesn't really matter if it's some of the newer stuff or the older because Godzilla movies are hilarious to watch, and action movies are good to as long as it's not the guy has to go take over a small country because his wife got kidnapped version, and I'm going to watch something like that I would rather watch the cliche superhero movies or fantasy stuff I guess.

I think the only type of movie I just don't really know what to do with are romance movies and I usually fall asleep during those and that's not really the best look when you're trying to watch a movie with someone.

What about you?

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[vitrealissour]

Dear SparrowConspiracy,

I'm sure you've gotten a lot of comments about your name and how birds are government drones or just plainly not real. Maybe the opposite and people are defending the birds like the fighter pilots need defending...

So, I'll try and be a little different and simply ask what your favorite and least favorite Swynlake mass hysteria dream was. If... you have been here for any. I feel like it has been a hot minute since we've had one.

My most favorite was probably the pirate one. It's about the vibes, not the deaths. Least favorite.... hm, there's a lot of bad ones. Oddly enough, I'd say regency. It was quite boring if you weren't one of the people competing for love like we are in these emails apparently.

VS

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Vitrealissour,

Name conversations from someone named after a moth weren't on my bingo card today but sure, yeah. And you're right, I've heard it as often as I expected to. My name has nothing to do with birds though to be honest.

Most of those I end up being a problem so varying degrees of annoying, but probably not untrue. I guess I am a problem and the dreams just like to remind me of that.

I agree with you on the regency thing, it was pretty boring from where I was at in it. I missed a lot of the ones I hear about though, I think it's unfortunate the most exciting one I went through was probably the theme park one and that's kind of sad. The camp one barely counts because I didn't even get any interesting monster encounters unfortunately.

I wouldn't have thought of these letters as competing for love but now that you've said it it's very funny to me; it's like the digital version of a reality TV show and now I want to see who gets ghosted and kicked off the metaphorical island.

How do you even win a competition like that?

- Sparrow

[briskthames]

briskconspiracy

Dear sparrowconspiracy,

absolutely fascinated by your username. I hope the conspiracy goes well. lol.

I'm not a believer in conspiracy theories, but I do find it funny to hear them said. What about you? Is it just a fun username for you or do you buy into something wild like the earth being flat or the moon landing not being real?

Sincerely, briskthames

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Briskthames,

Sometimes I feel like my entire life is a conspiracy, which does mean it doesn't get boring very easily. I don't know about that whole flat earth or moon landing thing though, in theory plausible but maybe just in theory. My brain likes science too much to just want to believe anything and everything.

But then again magic kind of makes anything possible so moon landing maybe, the earth being flat though? I don't think so.

But you don't like conspiracy theories, huh? Why not? I mean I'm not judging I'm just curious as to why. The entertainment value alone is pretty high with some of them. Like those people who think everyone is secretly a lizard person if they're powerful. I'm not sure why lizard person was the way to go there, what it is about lizards specifically that someone decided was definitely what rich people have to be?

I mean if that one was true it would be kind of funny. I'm just picturing giant heat lamps and mansions full of sand.

- Sparrow

@briskthames

[spacesuitmocha]

~SpaceConspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

Ask the right people and they'll tell you those ancient reptiles didn't exist either, and by right people I mean the wrong people with the theories.

Give me time, I can truly impress you with my creative abilities in that area.

Oh good, coffee is hit or miss but I can appreciate the science. Don't know what I would do if we had to have an entire conversation about the Hatter's menu. It is practically an entity within itself but also I feel like it's one of those entities that is unknowable in its full power.

At this point? Existing. Which I guess is probably true for most people. Is there a specific question in that?

What about you? So science and coffee? Does that mean a date would be potentially blowing up part of a building with an experiment fueled by the unstable properties of coffee, or is it just coffee and stargazing?

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[spacesuitmocha]

Sparrow,

Glad you don't think they're the 'right' people or we'd have some problems.

I'll start my watch.

Yeah, I'm not like some kind of connoisseur. I like what I like. But it's pretty wild how Hatter keeps coming up with things.

Existence is sometimes the hardest part. But you know, I guess why are you participating in all of this? What's got you looking in a new direction?

Ha, no I wouldn't use coffee to do that.

My scientific vibes are more like Rube Goldberg-y. So the coffee machine would be used to set off a chain reaction to make something else move, maybe a microwave for popcorn if we were watching something. I'm not really a massive stargazer. Yeah, they're pretty, but I'd rather keep moving under them than just sit.

-SM

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I guess what else do you do around here if you own a coffee shoppe but dodge random magical monsters and invent new coffee ideas.

No idea, I guess I was morbidly curious. I don't know if meeting people online actually does anything so far as relationships but you have the added strange component of the people you're meeting online probably just living down the road from you or something in this situation and that's funny. I'm not exactly looking for some sort of true love, butterflies and magical story moment, I guess I'm just better at talking to people online that I am in person so why not?

I guess if nothing else maybe I'll find someone I have enough in common with to have a conversation with.

Well that does sound more interesting, yeah. I do like the figure it out along the way scientific method, usually ends up more entertaining as long as you don't accidentally summon a test tube monster or whatever because I wouldn't put that past the impossible around here.

Experimental monster summoning is not something I am advocating for as a date possibility, probably.

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[deerdoodle]

Deerconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

The birds haven't told me if they were real or not so I can't confirm. Are you real? Am I? It is the Internet; what's real in the first place?

Nature is fine though unless it's trying to freeze me to death or throw something at me and I might deserve either of those so who knows? Haven't asked nature either; pretty sure they're busy and I'd just have to leave a message.

- Sparrow

@deerdoodle

[deerdoodle]

I think that birds and trees and stuff are the only "real" stuff out there, though I'll agree with you on the internet being fake. I'm not convinced this isn't just a sorcerer's box convincing me a person is on the other side of.

I'm pretty sure you're an "inside person," huh?

- Deerdoodle

[sparrowconspiracy]

I think it's a different type of real, not magic. Just not the sort of real most people are used to. But by your logic if I'm not real that probably means you're talking to yourself?

I don't mind being outside, I just don't really have much of a reason to do it. If I had reasons, sure, I'd be outside more. Maybe not in the winter though, winter is kind of miserable for me. I'm not great with cold weather.

So what does an 'outside person' like to do?

- Sparrow

@deerdoodle

[spacesuitmocha]

~SpaceConspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I haven't asked any birds lately if they're real or not so I might not be the expert on that one.

Maybe birds are aliens, you might know that one better than me.

I have nothing witty to ask about your name so I've failed as a person, but I do like it. Science or coffee, or both?

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[spacesuitmocha]

Sparrowconspiracy,

Fair point.

I don't think birds are aliens. They're just ancient reptilian ancestors.

I've heard worse failures.

Both. Preferably coffee then science. Science helps digest and channel the coffee. But if I had to choose one, I think I'd pick science.

So what's your deal?

-SM

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

Ask the right people and they'll tell you those ancient reptiles didn't exist either, and by right people I mean the wrong people with the theories.

Give me time, I can truly impress you with my creative abilities in that area.

Oh good, coffee is hit or miss but I can appreciate the science. Don't know what I would do if we had to have an entire conversation about the Hatter's menu. It is practically an entity within itself but also I feel like it's one of those entities that is unknowable in its full power.

At this point? Existing. Which I guess is probably true for most people. Is there a specific question in that?

What about you? So science and coffee? Does that mean a date would be potentially blowing up part of a building with an experiment fueled by the unstable properties of coffee, or is it just coffee and stargazing?

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha

[criticalable]

Sparrowconspiracy x Criticalable

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

Probably everything, those guys see a lot I'd guess. Can't trust em.

It took me a second to figure out your name which made it much more entertaining, brilliant. Already having a great time and the conversation just started.

Do we just get the supposedly encouraged 'favorite date idea' question out of the way first to appease the Swynlake social interaction gods first then have an actual conversation?

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[criticalable]

Dear Sparrow,

I see, so your conspiracy about the sparrows is that they have a lot of conspiracies? I'm glad you like the name, I was pretty proud when I came up with it!

Well, I suppose the question can't hurt, right? I think my ideal date would be a picnic and a walk by the lake. I love being out there. What about you?

Sincerely, Criticalable

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

They're always gathered up chirping about something, they have to have secret plans. Probably have tiny evil headquarters and plots to hit bird seed factories. Or whatever. No idea if bird seed factories are a thing.

But this is a magic town. Sparrows could have an agenda.

Can't say I go to the lake often, but sure, I guess so? The people usually make the date more than the location so I'm not overly picky. Anything distracting.

If I had to pick? Probably movies and hanging out, but you have to be flexible, right? Find things the person you're meeting likes doing? Get creative.

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[deerdoodle]

Deerconspiracy

[deerdoodle]

@sparrowconspiracy

Are you another nature-lover or are you one of those people who don't believe birds are real? I know birds, choose wisely.

Warmly, Deerdoodle

[sparrowconspiracy]

The birds haven't told me if they were real or not so I can't confirm. Are you real? Am I? It is the Internet; what's real in the first place?

Nature is fine though unless it's trying to freeze me to death or throw something at me and I might deserve either of those so who knows? Haven't asked nature either; pretty sure they're busy and I'd just have to leave a message.

- Sparrow

@deerdoodle

[criticalable]

Sparrowconspiracy x Criticalable

[criticalable]

Dear Sparrowconspiracy,

Hi! Nice to meet you! Or be writing to you, I guess. I need to know, what are the sparrows conspiring about? Or is a conspiracy about sparrows?

Sincerely, Criticalable

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Criticalable,

Probably everything, those guys see a lot I'd guess. Can't trust em.

It took me a second to figure out your name which made it much more entertaining, brilliant. Already having a great time and the conversation just started.

Do we just get the supposedly encouraged 'favorite date idea' question out of the way first to appease the Swynlake social interaction gods first then have an actual conversation?

- Sparrow

@criticalable

[spacesuitmocha]

~SpaceConspiracy

[spacesuitmocha]

Dear Sparrowconspiracy,

Please tell me that this user name isn't indicating that you're an 'a birds aren't real' theorist.

Or you're just convinced the birds know things.

-SM

@sparrowconspiracy

[sparrowconspiracy]

Spacesuitmocha,

I haven't asked any birds lately if they're real or not so I might not be the expert on that one.

Maybe birds are aliens, you might know that one better than me.

I have nothing witty to ask about your name so I've failed as a person, but I do like it. Science or coffee, or both?

- Sparrow

@spacesuitmocha