DEAR READER
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
NASA
if i look back, i am lost
wallacepolsom
Sade Olutola
pixel skylines
No title available
$LAYYYTER
@theartofmadeline
No title available
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Love Begins
izzy's playlists!
⁂
Jules of Nature
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
will byers stan first human second
Game of Thrones Daily
seen from Malaysia
seen from Russia
seen from South Korea
seen from Türkiye
seen from Sri Lanka
seen from Colombia
seen from Colombia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Jordan
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
@spodify-blog
Try not to drive yourself mad baby girl. Breathe...breathe deeply and tell yourself everything will be okay. So what if he doesn't want to be with you anymore? Plenty of other men out here - finally you've gotten this dead weight out of your life, this relationship destined to go nowhere and to have no meaning. It'll be okay darling, it'll hurt like mad for a few days but you'll be okay
someone: does anything better than me, ever
me on the outside: haha way to go!! im so happy for you 😊
me on the inside: 🔪🔪🔪
You've gotten lazy and complacent and you've taken me for granted
Men are so disappointing, I just wanna set my phone on fire
At least, that's what I tell myself
Many strong girls have similar stories: They were socially isolated and lonely in adolescence. Smart girls are often the girls most rejected by peers. Their strength is a threat and they are punished for being different. Girls who are unattractive or who don’t worry about their appearance are scorned. This isolation is often a blessing because it allows girls to develop a strong sense of self. Girls who are isolated emerge from adolescence more independent and self-sufficient than girls who have been accepted by others. Strong girls may protect themselves by being quiet and guarded so that their rebellion is known by only a few trusted others. They may be cranky and irascible and keep critics at a distance so that only people who love them know what they are up to. They may have the knack of shrugging off the opinions of others or they may use humor to deflect the hostility that comes their way.
Mary Pipher, Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls (via fyp-psychology)
I'm so mad why do you ignore me like that why do we not talk
Don't ever want to see your fucking face again I just want you to get the fucknout of my consciousness
Notes on: radical aloneness
Last fall, I presented a paper on relationship anarchy. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term (or concept), it can loosely be understood as a style of interpersonal relationships that doesn’t prioritize or hierarchialize relationships with others based on what takes place within them, at least a priori. In short, there’s a uniqueness to each relationship which makes their translation between relationships difficult to gather––a kind of ineffability that gets lost or violated in the transition. So, for example, you may relate with someone in a way that tends to be more like friendship: perhaps you sometimes get together for coffee, talk about things that are going on with your life, go for walks, make dinner together sometimes, etc––but, sometimes you mess around, not too often, but sometimes. Then, you may have another relationship that is a bit more weighty––for one reason or another it’s got a trajectory that shoots out into the future, a place where you may see yourself growing vegetables and living together, sharing projects, intertwining intricately. And then, just to have more than two examples, you may have a friend that is more traditionally just a friend: you watch hockey together, talk about books you’ve been reading, get a drink, whatever. There’s a complex calculus taking place in all of these relationships, a shifting definition, murky waters, not only interrelationship but intrarelationship, as well––just because you fucked around last time doesn’t mean it’ll definitely happen this time, just because you didn’t hold one another last time doesn’t mean you won’t this time, etc.
The point being is that, out of the gate, you can’t prioritize based on the activities that go on within the relationship––the only thing that can be said is that the relationships differ. Now, in lived experience, you may want to spend more time with the person who you see yourself growing vegetables with (this is one of the miserable aporias of existence: love seems infinite, but time isn’t…) but this isn’t because you have sex or because you don’t have sex, it isn’t because they’re “more than a friend” or whatever coarse terminology is hoisted upon it––it’s because that’s the way that relationship goes, its particular mode––you require more time with them for one reason or another: they ignite you, they unravel you beautifully, they support you unflinchingly, they catalyze splendid complexity and nuance. After I presented this paper, I spent some time with one of my former professors, a vibrant and shimmering man with a long philosophical history, but more importantly an insatiable thirst for life, gaiety, and joy––his continuing project being resolutely existential and affirmative. As we rode the bus late at night, he said to me something to the effect of: I absolutely loved your paper, why would we ever want people to be with us who don’t want to be with us? Why would we ever want to exercise power and control over loved ones, for that negates or corrodes love, rots it constitutionally. And then, in passing, right before I got on the bus I was transferring to without him, he said something to the effect of: what you need to be able to do relationship anarchy well is an incredible amount of radical aloneness. At the time, this comment slid right off me, it didn’t stick for an instant longer than hearing it and offering a surface response without thinking, “Yeah, you’re right, I think.” What does radical aloneness mean, anyway. To me, it’s some sort of commitment to your shit, what you’ve got going on, a wellness and health that supports engagements with others, comes to the rescue when you want to lash out and heave at others, take people down because of your own insecurities. One who has cultivated an abundant radical aloneness can let the other be because they’ve got their own projects and projections, their own vital flow. If the one they love wants to be with others for whatever reason, they can be upset and bothered, even jealous of course, but on the whole everything is okay, for they are fecundity. You only know you haven’t cultivated radical aloneness when it’s too late, when you need it, unfortunately. Radical aloneness shouldn’t be equated with the singular or the individual either––sometimes radical aloneness means that you have fostered relationships with others that support you and supplement you. Other times radical aloneness means being actually alone, but alone is of course always populated by others as well, even if you’re alone in space at a given time. Events of late have lead to reflect upon the ways that I create, sustain, and tend to my sense of radical aloneness. I think that, in other circles, this would be taken up as self-care, but this is unfortunate, I think. Radical aloneness can encompass what is broadly construed as self-care, sure, but sometimes radical aloneness means fleeing the self, evacuating the self’s rigid postures and habits, and setting out on unforeseen trails––instead of watching over the self, dismantling the self, letting the light shine in, opening up a window, cracking things up a bit. Maybe I’m being too fine with distinctions, but I think there’s a difference. Beyond that, I think that radical aloneness is the wellspring of being with others confidently and creatively: it is from this shimmering becoming that we can glow with others, connect with others in productive and dazzling ways. Radical aloneness as generative and combinatorial, experimental and stochastic, seeking to build and proliferate. Sometimes self-care is necessary to do this: sometimes you just need someone to make you an avocado sandwich, but an avocado sandwich isn’t going to propel you into radiance, just get you into the position where you can once again have the opportunity to luxuriate. Maybe in subsequent posts I can explore the ways in which I cultivate this radical aloneness, or perhaps the times when it would have been immensely useful to have access to.
Confidence and grace Confidence and grace Confidence and grace Confidence and grace Confidence and grace Confidence and grace Remember.
Perhaps my life is nothing but an image of this kind; perhaps I am doomed to retrace my steps under the illusion that I am exploring, doomed to try and learn what I should simply recognize, learning a mere fraction of what I have forgotten.
André Breton, Nadja (trans. Richard Howard)
Pretty alone and pretty miserable
what do you yearn for? immeasurable depth, to be profoundly free, wisdom to be happy
This is what you get when you expect too much from life - bitter disappointment
15 things to remember:
1. that thing you did that was kind of embarrassing and weird, everyone else forgot about that already
2. you look fine today, if you can’t notice something on your face standing 6 feet from a mirror then nobody else will either.
3. social lives can go through cycles sometimes, if you feel like your friends are all ignoring you for no reason they’re probably just busy with other things.
4. if you can’t stop thinking about someone or something, read a book, paint your nails or watch a movie. it won’t solve any serious problems but you will feel better.
5. listen with the intent to understand, not the intent to reply.
6. if you want something, go get it.
7. drink lots of water, eat lots of fruit, exercise more, go outside, get enough sleep and think positive thoughts.
8. if you don’t ask, the answer will always be no.
9. throw away the idea of a perfect tomorrow and live in the moment.
10. stop comparing yourself to others.
11. a beautiful day begins with a beautiful mindset. It’s a privilege to simply be alive and healthy. Start acting like life is a blessing.
12. act the way you’d like to be and soon you’ll be the way you’d like to act.
13. you will change. You’re not the same person you were three years ago. you’re not even the same person you were three minutes ago and that’s okay. especially if you don’t like the person you were three minutes ago.
14. you don’t have to open the curtains if you don’t want to.
15. being happy is the most important thing.
Sure it stings when I look at you but I think I'm over you Someone asked me when the last time I had sex and i completely glazed over the moments we had last week - means I've put you out of my mind
Forreal tho I could feel your cock throb in my hand every time I moaned in your ear
