Years erased, existant only in the memories of others and their eyes. Faces that age when i see them, are you still here? Remembering time has passed, their memories mighhhht be more stressed than i wanted that i couldnt smile and they couldnt tell. Congestion. Tongue that feels like nothing. I feel ... horrible. I am tirrrreeeeeeeddddddddddddd
Fast flash of the present and the past? Booom boom boom im here, ive forgotten youre not where i remember but the perception is altered?
Each time cold breath, no sweat, no breath. Elastic huuurts. I dont remember and then i put on pants too tight my stomach screeeeeams.
Surgeries that never happened.
Fingers that struggle to grasp
When i dont think im cool
I am surpressing some fucking
My head sheeiks from dehydration, i struggle to stand , i stop thinking and make it to the refridgerator. Flash +/×/÷//÷_=
Rest, a voice comes, i lean and rest i forget what im doing and its ok, i make it back without a worry
I wake up, i cant breath, or couldnt, scared,
I used to feel things in the small space between waking and turning, which would make my heart race like 20
Space apace between waking and thinking
Each new thought makes me forget.
My head hurts and i know but it isnt always as real as youd think
If people tell me theyre concerned i start to feel it badly, and remember that i chose to think i was insane rather that feel my nerves regenerating.
I think we may have a gas leak
Why did our eyes turn yellow all three?
I want to return to fulfilling memories and not a fear that every minute thought breath step move . Conscious mistake ssss
My heart beats fast and sometimes i feel it it feels burnt?
At what time have i not returned to writing
Now, when i cannot feel my tongue or anything???
Tired words and i lose my grip, sure sure sureeee
Fast flash combat and attack instannnnt wooooororoorords
I should be smiling, remember me from 2012-13 and read it before i lost my voice and cadence
Scrolling checking out pics of
I havent slept since august wxept being awoken bh a dream to open the window
I want her to be happy and with me forever on travels.
But i say things and dont want anyone to respond, enact preform, intuit.
My voice from 2018?? 2015?????????????????????? 2012
Am i unchanged, waiting to let my consciousness seep into something when i had an anchor, experiences that dont fucking exist when i wasnt there.
It seems like so long since ive talked to someome and had them reply to what inwas saying
Im tired, oooh yes i know youreee exhausted you sound exhausted
I want the timeline where i didnt sacrifice years worth if memories to get healthy or the way that it was ok ? But the horror or fucking smiling and everyone smiles back and you say nononononon actually im like asleep i cant control my face
Nights in a bathtub looking at hives crying this isnt real this isnt real.
So dont take this seriouslu, please.
What like obligations do we have to like mirror those,,,, years and years..... i am sometimes unsure what to make of like ... functioning as this kind of happier persom and wveryone loved it and it was and is a bit magical.
And i fret like whyyyyyyyyyyy
And like who remembers me from which timeline, like as ive been losing memories and sensation, i wish to return somehow.
Im too tired to analyze this because obvoously, but like
Im tired - i see youre exhausted following by im tired- ah i hear that so often!
Each person a moment a way from connecting like idk.
Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepppppp apnea
yousharknotpass
gummygunk
theartofmadeline
vaporwave
stormborns
