Untitled

[maidthings]

i really like how the milkman exists as an entirely fossilized character who now serves no purpose other than to fuck people's wives for the punchline

[threedollarsdotcom]

did someone set gwtting out of bed to hard mode or what

[heated-blanket]

they’re foreclosing on my mind palace

[justsomeguycore]

horror movie showing a child’s drawing of the monster or ghost or whatever but instead of a little kid and crayons they’re like a preteen and it’s manga style

[hydrocities-left]

If you don’t like rice then idk man get well soon I guess

[hydrocities-left]

all the bitches in the notes saying that rice sucks need to remember that rice backwards is ecir which means absolutely nothing. just like their opinion

[patronsaintofmistakenidentity]

"cigarette" implies the existence of a much larger "cigar"

[patronsaintofmistakenidentity]

i recovered by the time i hit post but when i first had this thought i had genuinely forgotten cigars exist

[threedollarsdotcom]

im aborted and its you

[even-more-nonsense]

Failure to reach the heavens

[hhhhhhhbees]

HOLY SHIT

[snowulate]

flavoured water is angry water that’s been flavored by vaguely fruity piss

[carnadelions]

twitter: am i too woke for thinking fat people shouldn't be stoned to death

tumblr: you're calling me racist? how do you think that makes my non-white oc feel?

instagram: if he doesn't look at you the way your boy cat looks at you he's not 🤚 the one 💍

[sufjansjoy]

i just wanna go on a gay guy vacation with penises…….

[sufjansjoy]

i would have sex with another man believe it or not

[heartemoij]

i have a disease that makes me like pink and heart shaped objects and it’s called being a fucking genius

[snowulate]

i want a really buff fridge

[dragonroar87]

legendary dashboard pull

[gonzos-humansona]

my hips don't lie but they will exaggerate details, misrepresent the facts, and on occasion deceive via omission of crucial information

[brown-forking-weed]

healthy homemade marlboro red recipe no sugar added