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On my period and best believe I’m projecting onto Yuri

I feel like she gets bloated and it’s so very uncomfortable (I’m assuming it’s just bloating and my organs aren’t actually falling out). I mean considering I headcanon her as having hEDS, POTS, and MCAS, gastrointestinal problems are a given

#art #ddlc yuri #ddlc monika #ddlc natsuki #ddlc sayori #doodle #ddlc headcanons

Art of the girls in my DDLC au/fic!! :P

Speedpint!! :P ignore how it’s just Natsuki on the cover, it’s a speedpaint of them all

#art #fanfiction #ddlc monika #ddlc sayori #ddlc yuri #ddlc natsuki #speedpaint #ddlc fanart #fanart

ssspork

I was thinking about Monika and the players relationship and like, obviously it’s unhealthy, but holy fuck it really feels like a metaphor for an abusive relationship. Honestly the only reason I’m saying metaphor and not just “it is” is because Monika’s a victim not from the player’s actions but from the game itself and what it is.

Monika’s entire reality and safety is dependent on the player, as she describes getting tortured when the game’s closed. Monika is extremely lonely and isolated because she can’t talk with her friends due to the script limiting her from meaningful interactions. Monika is at the complete mercy of the player as the player can always delete her file or simply leave, but Monika is completely incapable of leaving. Monika has no idea who the player is, including how old they are.

That last point is REALLY important. Monika is portrayed as a high schooler FIRST, high schoolers are associated with teens, because 80% of high schoolers are teens, or rather 100%, but I’m just saying under 18 for now. If you portray a high schooler, people are going to assume they’re a teen. And at least Natsuki SHOULD be a teenager, as she’s younger than Monika, whose birthday is on the same day the game was released and the same month the game starts. So the game wants you to think of these girls as teens/minors.

Once again, she (thought of by the game as a minor) has no idea how old the person she’s at complete mercy of is. That feels like a grooming allagory.

Also, yes, I know Monika is 18. However, I don’t think she was thought of as 18 when the game was being made. Largely cuz of my point from above that if Monika is 18, Natsuki isn’t, but Natsuki IS 18. I think they’re all 18 cuz Dan Salvato knew that type of content wouldn’t stop if they were underaged.

Speaking of such, Monika directly asks to not have that type of art be made of her, however as we can infer, that request was not respected. Imagine if that was like, a real person. Like let’s contextualize this for a bit:

A highschool girl gets into a relationship with someone she doesn’t know the age of and is dependent on, she asks for them to not make porn of her and they do behind her back.

That’s AWFUL. I know it might seem like I’m cherry picking and in part I am, but that’s only the porn thing. Everything else is just…what it is.

Now I’m not gonna go and say everyone who’s played DDLC is an abuser to Monika, not even the people who draw NSFW of her. It’s more that DDLC kinda feels like a metaphor for an abusive relationship, and a large part of that is just how dependent Monika is on us because of the fact she’s in a game. That’s not the player’s fault, and the player didn’t put her there.

Well…Actually the player DID kinda put her there. I mean just loading the game puts her in that situation. Going off of that, cuz I think that argument’s silly, the game IS a dating sim, or kinda is meant to satirize them. It IS odd there’s a highschool based dating sim, doesn’t matter how old they are, it’s weird. And I think that was the point. I mean DDLC satirizes dating sims, for example: Natsuki, where her “petiteness” comes from starvation, and isn’t cute or adorable or anything. Where Sayori’s clutzy clumsy sweetness is actually depression, and is taken seriously. Hell Yuri’s obsessiveness is made into a “holy shit I don’t want this” in act 2. I mean this game just sets up “yeah, you like this? Did you know it’s actually because of something awful? Yeah, how do you feel now?” The entire game hates dating sims, so pointing out the dangerous nature of having a dating sim set in highschool by making Monika kinda a grooming allegory doesn’t feel too far off (cuz if an adult is playing a high school dating sim set in high school telling you 24/7 “this is high school and these are high schoolers!!” That’s dangerous cuz why are you attracted to characters who are constantly pointed out as high schoolers? You aren’t uncomfortable? You don’t find it weird? At the very least it normalizes romanticizing high schoolers to that adult. Which is dangerous)

Anyways, now that I’m thinking about it, this’d be an interesting fic of a non-game au. Not of MC being an adult but some random guy. I’m already working on a fic and this fic would need to give grooming the space and depth it deserves and I’m not sure if I can do that

#I wanna clarify ur my point from my post from this reblog cuz u pointed out something I forgot to clarify oops #i don’t necessarily believe the player’s a groomer. rather Monika feels like a grooming allegory #it’s more so Monika herself acts like someone whose been groomed #or rather puts herself in situations that are dangerous because she believes it’s okay #her behavior feels reminiscent of a grooming victim. at least to me. especially with her relationship with the player #but the player isn’t intentionally doing this to manipulate her. which is why the player isn’t necessarily a groomer #it’s honestly more like the game itself ?#really the core of my statement is that her behavior reminds me of that. and the situation she’s been put in #I’ve collected my thoughts more thoroughly than from when I originally made the post

It’s so odd to write Natsuki in the fic I’m writing cuz her biggest issue (other than her dad) is her disliking with being misunderstood or misperceived. Like nobody likes that, but even at the HINT of being seen as cute she gets upset. I feel like tho, that’s largely because she’s scared of not being seen with the amount of depth that she has or being flattened to just a “cute little thing!!” (Which is ironic cuz that’s literally how the fandom perceives her). I feel like this also goes with how she pretty much immediately opens up the moment she feels safe, like in the side stories she immediately went like “oh yeah I take online tests all the time and here’s my manga” which is something she could totally get bullied for, and she KNOWS that, but she doesn’t like to hide who she is. Natsuki’s honestly pretty open about herself, and I feel like she REALLY wants to open up about some of her issues at home. Like she doesn’t WANT to cuz that’s really fucking scary and she’s been able to open up about her manga all the time online so she has practice but she’s probably never opened up about her father. I feel like she wants someone to ask, even if she doesn’t open up, I feel like she just wants someone to see that something’s wrong and that someone cares. I feel like that’s part of why she doesn’t want to be flattened, because she wants someone to see that there’s something wrong, and they can’t do that if shes just the “short cute little girl!!”

This is a bit odd for my fic, cuz in my fic, she’s managed to open up about (some) of her home life…not all of it. But SOME. Therefore, she knows the girls won’t flatten her or just see her as cute, she’s more willing to open up about problems (cuz I feel like she keeps problems CLOSE to her, even if she wants people to notice or care), she’s less standoffish cuz she doesn’t feel like she needs to defend herself as much. Her main internal issues have been confronted…before the fic even started… which is an issue because EVERYONE ELSE is all fucked up, like Yuri’s opened up about her self harm…she hasn’t stopped. Sayori’s opened up about her depression…she’s still suicidal. Natsuki’s issue was literally just opening up and allowing herself to be vulnerable (as stated before, while she wants people to notice something’s wrong, I don’t think she’d actually open up. The issue that’s being addressed isn’t just being vulnerable but also opening up when needed, even if others don’t notice any issues). So she’s oddly stable as compared to everyone else. It honestly kinda makes me feel bad, she should be allowed to just tweak the fuck out like everyone else!!

However, her issues not being internal but external still work with some themes this fic has, and I can still make her so sad!! I’m still trying to develop her issues, just because she’s pretty mentally stable doesn’t mean she isn’t totally suffering, and I am writing with that in mind

#fanfiction #ddlc natsuki