I can always post worse
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@stardeathsprisoner
I can always post worse
i need to read everything ever before the end of the summer
I don't like to admit it, but sometimes I actually miss John Green.
Sometimes I can almost hear him.
excuse me
no pants im afraid
a second bumblebee has hit the flowers
"post without tags?" OH IM FUCKING SORRY #BEES #9/11
whines pitifully . flops on the ground . bursts into flames
Whole Summer Solstice ☀️ 'Falling right there by the sunset, falling right there by you' Prints | Ko-fi | Patreon | Bluesky ⭐
CW// N.S.F.W
(Naughty Sexy Fucking Words)
You're final warninb
Your FINAL. ⚠️ WARNING
Seriously proceed with caution, especually if you are a traimatized individual
And hold space for any heavy emotions this brings up please ❤️and take care of yourself
Need dick badly for serious
Self care check: have you eaten recently? Did you sleep last night? Have you taken your meds? What.does a good day look like for you and what can you do today to get there ? How manyg
Tumblr Sexyman Contest 2026 Final Round
Senshi (Dungeon Meshi)
Ryland Grace (Project Hail Mary)
Mr. Ant Tenna (Deltarune)
Tenna art by @9Aaaalt29 on twt
“And if you’ll give me 40% of the MOST POPULAR VOTE, I’ll give you my SPECIAL REWARD... A year’s supply of NON-GLOOBY SLIME!!! Never or BARELY used!!!” Tenna concluded his speech with a huge smile, jetting his hands up in double peace signs.
The crowd roared in confused enthusiasm as Tenna gave a gracious flurry of low-FPS bows, pausing only for the occasional stink-nose at his audience plants who weren’t throwing enough 3D roses.
Eventually, the room fell silent. It was Senshi’s turn to speak.
He puffed out his chest, took a long, sweeping look over the audience… and shook his head.
“I can see not all of you are eating properly.”
The crowd murmured with embarrassment.
“I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it’s time to take the turkey out of your icebox. I have seen the ingenious technology with which your people store food... and I have also seen the waste which results from such convenience.
“The food you take had a life. Beasts grew fat on the grass of the field, plants grew from the sun’s rays, and mushrooms grew from minerals in the cracks of caves. And yet, it sits in your iceboxes, collecting moisture until it perishes.
“Eat what is given to you. Because its life will make you stronger, too.”
Without another word, Senshi left his podium and stepped away from the stage. The crowd murmured in confusion. “Is he really like that?” somebody said. “I only remember reblogging the photosets of him tripping and showing ass.”
--
Back in the Green Room, Tenna wrung his antennas nervously.
“Y-y-you think they liked me!? They HAD to!! I mean, I don’t know what Asgore was thinking, getting that weird haircut and running that food waste campaign, but… YOU thought I did good, didn’t you, Kris?”
Laios nodded aggressively, a streak of blue face paint peeling from his forehead.
“You did AMAZING, Tenna! By the way, now that we’ve seen all your insider campaign secrets, do you have any more videos of Susie? Especially her tail... If I could get a look at that, I could finally tell if she’s a dinosaur or --”
THWACK. Fake antlers butted Laios’s head.
“LAIOS?? Weren’t we dressed up to help SENSHI???” Marcille hissed, gesturing awkwardly with her hooves.
Suddenly, Tenna turned to the two adventurers.
“Hey, WAIT a second. SOMETHING’s not right here...”
Laios and Marcille held their breath.
“Where the heck are my POINTS!?”
Just then, the door opened. Chilchuck took one step into the room, whistling and holding a large bag.
Everyone turned to him.
Chilchuck paused, took a step backwards, and closed the door.
“CHILCHUCK!!!” yelled Tenna.
“How come Chilchuck got to stay Chilchuck!?” yelled Marcille at the same time.
--
Meanwhile, in outer space somewhere, some guy was making out with a rock.
if you've ever gone on a romantic "date" at olive garden just block me rn i literally can't deal with you proshippers -_-
what
when you're there you're family
once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out
July wasn’t going so well for franz kafka
HAPPIE BIRTHDAY SUNNIE!!!! YOU'RE SO COOL AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MWAH MWAH MWAH!!! I HOPE YOU SLEEP SOSO WELL AND THAT TOMORROW IS SO KIND AND FUN FOR YOU AND ALSO FULL OF #BLORBOTORMENT 💖💖💖💖💖💐🏵️🏵️🌹🌸🪻🌷🌼🌺🌻🌺 YAYAYAYAYYYYY 💖💖💖💖
WHAT THE HECK THANK YOU MY GRAY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 I LOVE YOU FOREVER YOU SHOULD DROP BY TOMORROW FOR MOVIE PARTY IF YOU'RE AROUND AT 11 AM FOR WHATEVER REASON... OR EVEN IF NOT YOU SHOULD COME SAY HI... I LOVE YOU FOREVER AGAIN...
atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin
agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe
christian pitcher throws a christian baby
People who think sheep are killed for their wool are so hilarious to me. Does your barber slit your throat whenever you get a haircut?? Are you a returning customer to Sweeney Todd? Lmao it grows back, fools.
This is completely ignoring the fact that the sheep's soul is stored in its wool. So sure, the body remains, but the spirit, the essence of the sheep, that's gone forever, and then as the wool regrows a new soul moves in.
Same for me, I get a new soul with every haircut. That's why my personality changes so much.
Tumblr citizenship means being completely unsure if the person posting about sheep souls is being 100% serious or is just taking the piss.
THEY TAKE THEIR PISS TOO?!?!?
Yup, stockpiling it in giant buckets to pour on the poor