Welcome to my observatory. I do art, write, play games, and watch stuff. Demi-Ro Repulsed Ace. No untagged explict shit. Tags/Asks from strangers asking for money will be blocked. «she/they»
<< Ley >>
I made up a creature. Right now it's detailed in this Google doc. Once I get a decent computer I'll get it looking less like it was made in the early 2000s lol.
Anyway they are called Anilineko. Mine is made of paint and her name is Sige. You can see her in the doc as the example and her sketch is provided but she got a minor change in the final version. ;)
If you do make your own, link this post. There are recommended tags to use in the doc. Have fun with them. I'd really like to see what you come up with.
Anilineko (Ah-ni-line-ko) The Anilineko or children of Aniline are said to have been born of a blessing from Aniline the goddess of craftwo
I hate when certain fandoms see an AroAce character and just act like their identity doesn’t exist. Yes it can be a spectrum. I’m aware of that. But SOME fans of certain characters(cough cough Alastor) Use that as an excuse JUST to put them in s3xual or romantic situations. You can’t just say “But Aroace is a spectrum!” Only so you can live your shipping fantasies. So I don’t get attacked I’m going to state again I know that Aromantic/Asexual people can still date/have s3x. It just gets to a point that it’s clear you are only saying it to ship a certain character. I honestly just hate aroace erasure. It just pisses me off. I also wish people shipped more characters queer platonically(Ex: I ship MidnightJester/Moon X Carme queer platonically). Many Aromantic and Asexual people are in queer platonic relationships! In summary; if a character is aroace and you want to ship them with a character don’t use ‘Aroace is a spectrum’ as an excuse instead of actually acknowledging the aroace spectrum :3
if your response to, “I wish there was more sex repulsed asexual representation,” is to point out not all aces are sex repulsed, maybe first stop and ask yourself why you are doing that. We live in a society that’s constantly telling us we need to have sex and I’m so glad there are aces who aren’t bothered by that, but it doesn’t invalidate those of us that do not want to. This isn’t a competition, I want to see all kinds of aces, being upset with a lack of respect for sex repulsed aces doesn’t mean I think the rep that’s already there for sex positive aces should be changed. I am capable of wanting both, why aren’t you?
sex-repulsed people are fully within our rights to be cranky and blunt about not liking sex and how it's fucking everywhere btw. we shouldn't have to tiptoe around and make sure our phrasing is perfectly squeaky clean because people interpret any criticism of sex and sexualization as puritanism. venting about compulsory sexuality is not purity culture. maybe you could stand to learn a thing or two from us.
Ok. So I haven't posted any of my season 8 watch notes on SG1 because....well I lost my motivation after getting to a certain episode. Don't worry I will get back to it eventually. But I suppose I can give a sneak peek into my thoughts on season 8 by discussing episode 7 (Affinity).
Long story short Affinity centers around Teal'c getting an apartment off base for the first time. During which he befriends a neighbor who is in an abusive relationship with her boyfriend. Teal'c brings questions of Taur'i relationships to Sam and Daniel who each have their own views on the matter.
TLDR (for the massive wall of text you are about to read) “Almost all cultures put a significant pressure on single adults to form bonding pairs.”- Daniel Jackson.
For those of you who want my long winded rant: My rewatch notes will be enclosed in << >> and in orange to distinguish them from the new text I'm adding now.
<<Daniel rattles off some facts about relationships. He uses examples from other cultures to lend insight but it's done in a way that tells us he wants to just info dump about shit he knows. History, cultures, people that's stuff Daniel loves learning about and sharing.
“Almost all cultures put a significant pressure on single adults to form bonding pairs.” Don't I know it. He again uses cultural examples instead of personal ones. This discussion is not one Daniel shares his own experiences with. The way he approaches it as a learning experience instead of a bro bonding moment is telling.>>
Now I view this as evidence of Daniel being ace but that's not exactly what we are here for right now. It's important though that Daniel doesn't really seem compelled to be in a relationship nor does he actively seek one out.
<<Sam's turn to….basically repeat what Daniel just said but with more modern and personal examples. She lists TV, Commercials, and Magazines as perpetrators in this compulsion.
“I think that's what I just said” Daniel isn't particularly stressed about his ‘lack of a love life’ but Sam seems to be distressed about hers.
“They make you afraid of being alone but at the same time, tell you not to settle for anything less than this perfect romantic ideal” So this scene is just a way to highlight that romantic entanglements are messy but my biggest issue is with Sam. Or rather how the writers handle this scene. Sam is unhappy with the compulsive amatanormativity (compulsive romance and “love”) and the solution isn't for her to take a step back and address it but rather to bury her head in the compulsion. Force herself to say yes to a man she deep down knows she doesn't want to be with because her only other option is “taken”.
“How's things?” Daniel can see Sam is getting more personal with it. Again he doesn't seem distressed. Teal'c doesn't really but he rarely emotes. >>
SO, to boil this down into a more condensed form. SG1 shows us what is very clearly a discussion on amatonormativy and the human societal pressure to, as Daniel put it, "form bonding pairs." This is a commonality through the show and the worlds visited and even the jaffa and goa'uld aren't exempt. But Daniel and Sam both seem to acknowledge and understand these pressures with varying opinions.
As I said, Daniel doesn't seek out a partner. Partners usually find him to various results (we won't get into that right now but let's just say the fandom treatment of Vala's "pursuit" of Daniel is telling and disturbing). Sam is, however, quite distressed as there is someone she does want to be with but for "reasons" (read military ranking and such) she knows they can't be together.
The show then goes on to do the single most annoying thing in the world and have Sam accept the proposal of a man who not only stalked her but also felt entitled to her entire life (we hate Pete). The conversation was seemingly leading Sam to the conclusion that "forming bonding pairs" is kind of bullshit but NO the writers couldn't fathom this woman not being with a man.
Just as many fandoms cannot fathom a character not being with another person (in the franchise or not). Yes, this all comes back to fandoms' favorite pastime of "let's force these characters to be in a relationship." What I find interesting is that this discussion of amatonormativity can happen in a show from the 90s (sure the ep was early 00s but still) and not only do the writers completely miss the mark but fans have also seemed to miss it as well.
The pressure to bond, to form lasting romantic and/or sexual relationship is so clearly present in our culture starting in our youth when we are consuming fairy tales about princes and princesses. This pressure is not alleviated as we get older but doubled down upon. Those of us in the aspec (not just the aros and aces but the others as well) are force fed a diet of relationship expectations to the point may of use first think we are broken for not meeting those expectations.
Seeing fandom spaces praise representation and slam erasure while erasing those of us who do not fit into the boxes of "bonding pairs" is not only disheartening but harmful. It's a common occurrence to see an aroace person talk about how they feel erased when fandom takes the one aroace character who is vehemently against such relaionships and force them into one. It only gets worse when they get shouted over with the line "but aroaces can xyz."
WE know aroaces can be in relationships. Shippers won't shut up about it and worse they feel like the only people biting back against the amatonormative shipping culture are allos. Aroaces know this, we know our own sexuality and we know we can do those thing but it's not much of a spectrum when ever piece of representation is shoved into the same damned corner.
Instead of addressing the issue we are erased or told we are the problem. That we need to conform or get out because they fought to be seen as if we are not the invisible orientations.
Ok. That got very ranty near the end but it's a bunch of shit that I've been holding in for a long damned time. This isn't just about a singular episode of a show that originally started in the 90s. IT's about the idea that “Almost all cultures put a significant pressure on single adults to form bonding pairs.”
people will jump through fifty thousand holes and summon a fucking demon from the ninth circle of hell by tap dancing to create an excuse to ship an aroace character with someone but when it comes to any other lgbtqia+ identity shipping them with someone they aren't attracted to is "erasing rep"
ok so this is another long shot but a few years ago there was a twitter post (in japanese i think?) that had measurememts for how to make this book stand thing out of cardboard that you could use to double up books and use up more space on shelves
back then i made a bunch of these but by now i lost the pic and dont know how to find the original post anymore
if it comes down to it i can just take one apart and get the measurements from there but i would be very grateful if anyone happens to have the original post or something similar??
don't mind how long it's been since i made this post, anyway i realized that i don't even need to take one apart to get the measurements when i can literally just unfold it and refold it /FACEPALM
so anyway here is the diagram for anyone else who is interested!!
this requires pretty big carboard pieces, if you have a really big box or something you can make it from one piece, but if you don't, you can also just make each of the pieces individually and then tape them together
and then in the end you put it together like this!!
and then when you make a bunch you can put them all next to each other and stack your books like crazy
EVERYONE START GETTING MORE USE OUT OF YOUR SPACE NOW!!!!
Is "at the end of the day you can ship what you want, just check your biases" too easy to confuse for 'queer policing'?
Do I need to spell it out in bold text?
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU SHIP, IT'S THE UNDERLYING APHOBIA THAT BOTHERS ME
Is that clear enough?
Is this what it takes to not be accused of policing queerness or shipping?
And after I literally said my askbox was open for people that wanted to learn how to properly depict romance and sex favorable aro/ace characters
I KNOW it does more good to educate and not police. That's why I made a post offering to do it!
"Older aces don't have this mentality"
And????
I'm pretty sure plenty of people have discussed fandom aphobia before as well. Even if they didn't I don't give two shits what you say "older aces" care about, I'm still going to care about calling attention to underlying biases in fandom spaces.
"I've only seen this mindset in the Hazbin Hotel fandom"
A) other fandoms actually do have these discussions. Obey Me being one that I've seen most often (I should play it some time)
B) Hazbin Hotel is a pretty massively popular show relative to other shows and games with aro/ace rep
Also it really fucking says a lot when the only other canonically ace character in the hellverse that's not sexualized by fans is only not sexualized because she's 17. (Don't misconstrue my words, I'm glad we're not sexualizing a 17 year old period. I'm just asking why it takes that for fandoms to have respect for an ace character's lack of sexuality)
There's actually a lot of us who have been wanting to put "it's a spectrum" on the high shelf because it's so grossly misuesd in fandom spaces
If asking people to approach an underrepresented identity with care and respect is "policing", especially with regards to the very little canon rep we get, then I guess I'm head of the aspec CIA
Also I would probably hate to hear what someone with this opinion would have to say to literally any other minority in fandom that asks the same because I know aphobia is far from the only discrimination issue in fandom
Seriously all but proving my point about how it's hard to discuss this shit without being accused of policing people or being an anti, cause god fucking forbid an aroace stand their ground and say "I actually don't like being disregarded when we get so little representation already". If you say anything other than "ship whatever you want with no regards" you're a no-good fun spoiler
And of course the pick-me has to come to the rescue and be all "Well actually☝️depicting an ace/aro character like that provides representation for sex/romance favorable ace/aro people"
Okay cool, if us romance/sex favorable aro/aces were so starved for recognition in fandoms, then tell me the last time you saw a depiction of a relationship involving an ace character in which their allosexual partner abstained from sex for them. Cause I see all the time how the ace character comes around to having sex for their allo partner, never the other way around though. Wonder fucking why...
in regards to the constant dismissal of his aroace identity, i hate it when alastor 'fans' say and use the excuse: "he's fictional, he won't get offended."
like, you're right, but it can and will offend us.
when you see yourself being represented on screen, of course you'd feel enthusiastic about it — representation allows individuals to see themselves reflected in the media they consume, validating their identities and experiences. but when so many people take that representation and decide to disregard and discard it, it is so fucking frustrating. we finally have another character to be part of the tiny amount of representation we have, but then people don't even care about how much it means to us? like yeah, alastor won't get offended because he's not real, but it frustrates and annoys us. do you realize that it's also technically invalidating the aroace community? that you're invalidating our feelings? imagine feeling like you're finally being seen because your orientation is finally being represented in media, and people just decide to blatantly ignore, discard, and invalidate it.
media has such a powerful influence on real life, representation being a prevalent factor of it. there are numerous posts that dictate how people went to watch a movie/show or read a book just because a character depicts their identity in it — obviously, being represented is an incredibly uplifting and validating experience.
which is why seeing an aroace character in a popular show is so meaningful to us because we live in a world where romance and sex are literally everywhere and prioritized above all else. (and it's pretty obvious that alastor's on the repulsed end of the spectrum, but even if he wasn't, at least make an effort to acknowledge his sexuality instead of continuing to portray him as allo; aroace folks can be in relationships but it's not going to be the same thing with allos' experiences.)
any and every representation matters, but why does that seem to stop at people under the aroace spectrum? like y'all can't even let us appreciate the scraps of representation we have. we barely have any, so are we really that dramatic for being upset at how people easily disregard and dismiss our identities that are being depicted on screen just like that? is it truly wrong of us to want to defend and maintain the little representation we have?
In my opinion, the way aspec characters (particularly Alastor, but other characters as well) are treated in fandom space is a direct mirror to the discrimination aspec people face in our own lives.
What I’ve heard in my own life, as well as what a lot of other aspec people have experienced, tends to sound like
“You just haven’t found the right person yet”
“But you can still date and be in romantic or sexual relationships, right?”
“But you still feel love so it’s okay”
“But some aces still have sex / some aros are still in romantic relationships” etc.
And other varieties of the idea that “if you are aspec, something is wrong with you, but it can be overlooked so long as you still fit into our little amatonormative boxes”.
( Also, I would like to note that the internet seems to have swung from “asexuality and aromanticism aren’t real” to “I’ve only bothered to learn that ace and aro people can and sometimes do still have romantic and sexual relationships so I can keep on ignoring their existence.” Which is really weird of you to say the least )
Even within the LGBTQ+ community, we aspec people are seen as less queer because supposedly we fit into allo cishet society, and less oppressed because the discrimination we face is not as overt as that faced by trans people, gay men, lesbians, and other minorities. I think this seeing us as less queer and less oppressed means our sexuality is not granted the same level of respect, which carries over into how fandoms, even predominantly LGBTQ ones, treat aspec identities, both real and fictional.
I have nothing against aspec people themselves who write Alastor as falling where they do on the aspec, but all too often, I see allo people thirsting over Alastor who use the asexuality/aromanticism spectrum as a convenient shield for completely ignoring how a relationship would look for an aspec character
Let it also be noted that Alastor is indicated by all existing canon material to want NOTHING to do with romance or sex. And quite frankly, while aro and ace characters are still scarce compared to other sexualities, there are far more aspec characters who are neutral or positive toward sex/romance than there are repulsed characters. If a canonically repulsed aroace character exists, I do believe it’s wrong for allo fans to ignore their orientation for the sake of shipping. It’s just putting them back into a comfortable little box that allos can understand rather than trying to learn.
"You want me to properly tag my NSFW art? You don't want it randomly popping up on your dashboard?? This is censorship!! This is purity culture!! You're a prude!!"
It really leaves a bad taste in my mouth when I see a fanfic shipping an aroace nonpartnering character romantically with someone else, not a qpr, not exploring their aromanticism or asexuality in any way nor even mentioning it, tagged with something like "lgbtq characters" or "lgbtq themes." like. yeah sure, it has themes of the types of lgbtq that you like and can make about you. fuck aromantics and aroaces and asexuals though they don't count, they're not queer enough. it's not lgbtq themes or characters unless there's two boys or girls kissing, cmon guys, that's what lgbtq is! that's the extent of it :)
aroace culture is lowkey blocking almost every ship tag involving your favourite character(s) because you just see their dynamic with certain people as platonic/qpp (and don't want to see the inevitable floods of suggestive art if the ship is super popular.) sorry i don't want to see my favouritest blorbo ever make out sloppy style or say awfully out of character suggestive things - it makes me deeply uncomfortable for some weird reason, it even gets viscerally uncomfortable sometimes ackkk <\3 i wish there were other people who saw them as anything BUT lovers
what does constantly saying that "aces can have sex!" accomplishes politically?
how does it help us promote our interests and boundaries? society already assumes that everyone will and wants to have sex by default! asexuals included because our experience and orientation isn't even taken seriously at all
why do we need to keep reassuring people that they can have sex? no one is stopping them from doing so.
why don't we talk more about the fact that no one HAS to have sex? both allo and ace included. yes, you heard that right! sex is only something you should do if you're fully on board with the idea and have a consenting partner that wants it also. it's not an obligation, you don't owe sex to anyone, not society, not your partner, not to anyone
why don't we talk more about that having boundaries is important and you should never compromise yourself for anyone. never let anyone pressure you into anything you don't want. isn't this a more important message to send into the world that is still full of sexual coercion and predators lurking about?
why don't we put more effort into protecting the most vulnerable members of our community instead of reassuring people endlessly that yes, you can still do everything that society already expects you to do..
bit too venty to wanna put this on my main but
PSA: If you ever use "there's no platonic explanation for this" to confirm your ship/otp/whatever I'm straight up assuming you believe:
- Romantic/sexual relationships are the 'highest rank' of relationships and friendships are inherently a step lower/inferior.
- You don't give a shit about ace or aro people.
- You don't acknowledge or believe people CAN have deep/strong/personal bonds and still be friends/platonic.
- You care more about confirming a ship than acknowledging the value of platonic relationships.
I am tired of seeing this shit. Fucking cut it out.
