I can honestly say right now is one of the most terrified ive ever been in my life,
uni is ending, and strangely i don't want to leave, theres been many a post from me about wanting to go home, and it some ways i do.
i don't have a massive set of friends here, and i don't have a particularly exciting life here, but i am happy, its been stressful irritating, and i sometimes i wanted nothing more than to quit and go home, but this past year and a half has been a successful one.
i have made some friends that ill never forget, and people that ill be happy to wave goodbye too
ive had stress like never before, and determination to grab grades like ive never known.
i fell in love like i always dreamed of, and realized that id never been happy before.
because im going to be hours and hours away from the person i cant go one day without. holidays during this last year were always so hard, i cried on every train home, and probably at least once a day from how much i missed my boy. i used to laugh at people on programmes who couldn't stand being separated for 3 days, but im certainly one of those people now,
the scariest part is everythings uncertain, i don't know where im going to live, what im going to be doing, or even if ill have the money to see him any time soon.
to get onto a teaching course at Birmingham and live just 10 mins away from my lad, and be closer to achieving the dream ive always wanted
but ive learnt the hard way that that's not easy, and ive stuggled and failed ot get onto a course so far, and i really feel like this is my last hope now,
if not its back home to hopefully find any sort of job that wull alow me to see my lad every weekend,
but even then, how long for, we cant go that way for years.
that's why im scared. that's why suddenly i don't want to leave crewe at all
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