⋆♛ || ETHEREAL. ⁽ ᵃᵘᵗᵒˑ ⁾

[silevestris-a]

          ──── ⋆ ;; ▌T O S K A .

[starscar-a]

57~

     ▌★ —; ( 𝔪𝔢𝔪𝔢. )  //   𝔰𝔱𝔠𝔯𝔪𝔦𝔦𝔢𝔡. #57 ━ things you said when no one else was around.

       “  i wonder … how many of them hate me?     how many of them want me dead?     how many of them believe me to be satan incarnate?     it’s a terrifying thing to consider … that my own allies might be so easily able to lie to my face.     then again,  who could blame them?     i’ve been lying to them for years.  ”

       “  i’m lonely.     please help me.     i don’t want to be alone.  ”

       “  i’m terrified.  ”

[magnoliamemes-deactivated201906]

Send 😍 if your muse finds mine ATTRACTIVE.

*Note* Sending these in doesn’t mean you want to SHIP….  it just suggests that your muse finds mine appealing.  

©Magnoliamemes

[starscar-a]

venting venting.     i don’t understand what’s happened to divide the community so much,  but i don’t find myself liking it at all.     i’m sad that people i was once friends with won’t even talk to me because  ‘ oh,  you interact with so and so.     i won’t talk to you,  sorry. ’      i suppose i just don’t understand.     we all used to be so close.     everyone stood united.     sure,  there were some different portrayals.     sure,  we didn’t all get along 100% of the time.     but still,  we were united.     and now ... i don’t know.     i don’t know what’s going on, but i don’t like it.     it makes me sad.

[starscar-a]

“why are you so stubborn?” slips you an ask because hello it's been ages

       “  stubborn?     me?     nonsense,  lavi~  ”     allen’s laughter is warm and vibrant as it reverberates around the hall.     he knows that the redhead is probably teasing him,  so he responds in kind.     probably.     that slim chance that lavi is being serious with him dogs him,  though,  the feeling being somewhat reflected in his guarded eyes.

[justanotherrpmemeblog]

things you said prompts;;

send a number and a pairing for a starter or drabble:

things you said at 1 am

things you said through your teeth

things you said too quietly

things you said over the phone

things you didn’t say at all

things you said under the stars and in the grass

things you said while we were driving 

things you said when you were crying

things you said when I was crying

things you said that made me feel like shit

things you said when you were drunk

things you said when you thought I was asleep

things you said at the kitchen table

things you said after you kissed me

things you said with too many miles between us

things you said with no space between us

things you said that I wish you hadn’t

things you said when you were scared

things you said when we were the happiest we ever were

things you said that I wasn’t meant to hear

things you said when we were on top of the world

things you said after it was over

things you said on the streetcar at 1 am

things you said with clenched fists

things you said in the back seat of a cab

things you said sitting still

things you said on the phone at 4 am

things you said but not out loud

things you said in the backyard at night

things you said on the highway

things you said while I cried in your arms

things you said I wouldn’t understand

things you said at the back of the theater

things you said in your sleep

things you said that made me feel real

things you said you’ll never forget

things you said with the tv on mute

things you said while holding my hand

things you said when we first met

things you said when you met my parents

things you said you loved about me

things you said when you asked me to marry you

things you said in our vows

things you said before you kissed me

things you said on new year’s eve

things you said when you kissed me goodnight

things you said in a hotel room

things you said on our honeymoon

things you said when we were 18

things you said when we were 70

things you said as we danced in our socks

things you said with my lips on your neck

things you said in the dark

things you always meant to say but never got the chance

things you said under your breath

things you said in the spur of the moment

things you said when no one else was around 

things you were afraid to say

things you said after we fell in love

things you said [make your own]

[starscar-a]

" D-Do you trust me? " With their lips still touching, her hand slid down from caressing his face, fingertips ghosting up his thigh.

       “  i - i ━━ that’s,  ah ...  ”     a long pause, in which allen takes yet another deep breath.     when did his hands come to rest against her hips?     how distracted he’s become ...     “  ... y - yes.     of course i do.  ”

[starscar-a]

" I have ... a favor to ask of you ... Please don't think badly of me. " Scooting closer to Allen, a shaky hand reaches out to caress his face. " Will you .... kiss me? I'm tired of being inexperienced and there's no one I trust more than you... "

          her fingers are like warm silk against his scarred cheek,  and allen is acutely aware of the pace of his heart as it threatens to fly out of the cage of his ribs.     color bursts into his cheeks as the teen stutters out a few aborted sounds,  choking on his own nerves in an attempt to giver her some semblance of a response.

       “  th - that’s ... i mean ...  ”     cue the fidgeting.     allen walker does not know how to go about any of this.     does she think he’s kissed before?     that he’s been kissed?     being asked by a beautiful girl for something that he’s only somewhat experienced in is intimidating enough,  to be certain,  but this isn’t just anyone requesting such a feat of him:   this is lenalee lee,  perhaps his closest friend.

          ... well.     fortunately for her,  walker rarely backs down from a challenge.     he takes a deep breath to center himself,  starlit eyes flickering closed as he exhales it out through his nose before offering his shaky response:   “  ... v - very well.     but please promise me that you will not inform your brother of this.  ”     his right hand rises to cup her cheek and gently angle her head slightly up,  allowing him to dip down ━━

          ━━ && he slots his mouth over hers in something that toes the line between a peck and a true kiss.

[melamemea]

intimacy . // meme .

“please… just kiss me…”

“i really want to feel your hands on me”

“touch me.”

“kiss me.”

“hold me…”

“just a little longer”

“come closer”

“keep whispering”

“god you make me feel alive”

“i want your tongue all over me”

“put your hand on my thigh”

“i love the way your hand feels”

“you smell so good”

“i don’t want to let go”

“i don’t think i can let go”

“there’s something in the way you touch me”

“your breath leaves goosebumps on my skin”

“closer…”

“more, please…”

“your breath is so warm”

“your hands are so cold”

“your hair is so soft”

[starscar-a]

“i saw the way you looked at them.”

     ▌★ —; ( 𝔪𝔢𝔪𝔢. )  //   𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔰𝔰𝔬𝔪𝔢𝔡​.

          there’s a certain amount of playfulness in his eyes when allen turns to look at her,  all innocent smiles and clasped hands.     why no,  he hadn’t been looking at that village girl and her rather striking lover.     at least he had assumed the man to be her lover.     if he hadn’t been,  then they’d certainly been mighty friendly ...     but oh,  what a handsome pair they had made:   her,  brunette ringlets and warm chocolate eyes and slender figure;   him,  firm biceps and blond hair and oh,  that perfect triangle that’s formed between his shoulders and his ━━

       “  i most certainly wasn’t looking in any way you might be implying,  lenalee.     and even if i had been ... who could blame me?     she was quite lovely,  was she not?  ”

          you fool no one,  you sinner.     the devil knows what’s on your mind,  allen walker.

[riskfulings-deactivated20180602]

&. JEALOUSY STARTERS.

— ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴊᴇᴀʟᴏᴜs ᴘᴇʀsᴏɴ ;

“i’m not stupid. who was s/he?”

“they keep looking at you…”

“i’m not jealous. fuck off.”

“why don’t you ask him/her instead?”

“i can see that s/he is into you.”

“stop flirting with him/her.”

“i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“i’m literally right here, babe.”

“you smile like that because you know you’ll get attention.”

“i didn’t come here to watch you flirt with other people.”

“what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“so i’m not allowed to be upset that s/he were hanging all over you?”

“it’s not funny.”

“i don’t fucking care. you’re supposed to be mine.”

“tell them to stop touching you.”

“i saw the way you looked at him/her.”

“well when you say it like that, it does sound crazy.”

“i have nothing to be jealous of.”

“you were staring at his/her ass.”

— ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴏᴛ - ᴊᴇᴀʟᴏᴜs ᴘᴇʀsᴏɴ ;

“do you not trust me?”

“i’m not flirting with anyone.”

“don’t do this here. you’re making a scene.”

“baby, look at me.”

“i didn’t even notice s/he was there!”

“you’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

“s/he’s just a friend.”

“you’re so cute.”

“no one is flirting with anyone.”

“you’re overreacting.”

“please tell me that you’re not serious.”

“you’re not even making any sense.”

“i’m yours. you know i’m yours.”

“what? i wasn’t looking anywhere!”

“that’s just the way i talk, actually.”

“i only have eyes for you.”

“be logical for once, oh my god.”

“you know i’m not doing it on purpose.”

“you’re adorable when you’re jealous.”

[starscar-a]

(timcanpy) Target. Sighted. The golem wastes zero time and darts directly towards his master's face, slamming into his cheek as hard as a little squishy golem can, little trails of tears streaming from an unknown origin.

          that hurt way more than it should’ve.     allen’s dizzy and slightly confused,  left hand slowly rising to tug  ( read as:   peel )  the golden creature off of his scarred cheek.

       “  ... tim ...?     timcanpy ...?  ”     no,  dammit,  he’s not about to cry.     he’s not.     but he is,  and tears begin streaming down his ashen cheeks as he cups the golem and rubs it against his face.     “  timcanpy!!     oh my goodness,  i’ve missed you!!  ”

[starscar-a]

“please look at me.” deep inhale

     ▌★ —; ( 𝔪𝔢𝔪𝔢. )  //   𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔰𝔰𝔬𝔪𝔢𝔡​.

          he dares not.     he must not.     oh gods,  why oh why did it have to be lenalee lee who stumbled upon his most recent hiding place?     curses,  inaudible but no less cruel,  are thrown skyward from his mind’s mouth,  and allen hopes that god can bleed from their ferocity.     he doesn’t want to face her,  can’t face her after their last meeting,  her tears wet against his overheated shoulder as he braces an arm around her slim waist–

          no.     thinking about that will certainly do him no good - all it seems to do is make him want to turn around.

          … so … why is his body betraying him?     why can’t he stop himself from turning to look at her?

        “  ━━ you weren’t supposed to find me.  ”

[starscar-a]

“you’re making me think that what they told me about you was right.”

     ▌★ —; ( 𝔪𝔢𝔪𝔢. )  //   𝔥𝔞𝔱𝔯𝔢𝔡𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔢𝔯𝔞𝔩.

       “  and what,  pray,  is it that they say?  ”     his tone is saccharine,  the one he uses when he is very clearly lying and wants the other party to know it:   however,  his eyes are twin stars burning dangerously behind hooded lids.     they burn to purify him of his guilt,  his foolish curiosity and dread.     just what do they say about allen walker back at the order?     is he forgotten or fondly remembered?     a traitor or a victim?     messianic or maledict?      “  do tell,  kanda.     quickly now,  i’d rather not be tailed to my next destination.  ”

[starscar-a]

“how long will this go on for?”

     ▌★ —; ( 𝔪𝔢𝔪𝔢. )  //   𝔴𝔥𝔦𝔱𝔢𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔫.

      “  ━━━ i don’t know,  lenalee,  ”     it’s said softly,  accompanied by a whisper of fabric as he turns in his chair.     argent eyes are silken as they flicker over to his companion,  to tightly - clenched fists folded in a trembling lap.     she looks so fragile in that moment.     allen wants to pull her to his chest and never let anything in the world harm her again,  break her again.       “  nothing is certain for the likes of us.     everything we know could change in an instant.     it was put into stark perspective for me this week:   i mean,  we practically lost everything overnight,  you know?     our home,  our security,  half of our friends …  ”     he trails off,  eyes going blank and cold as they pan away from her.     and how much of that could he have prevented?     how many lives could he have saved?     if only he’d worked harder,  pushed himself more,  been better …     “  ah,  i’m sorry.     i was rambling,  wasn’t i?     forgive me,  lenalee.     the move has just been hard on me,  i think.  ”

[riskfulings-deactivated20180602]

&. SOFT ANGST STARTERS.

“please look at me.”

“is s/he really just a friend?”

“i’m just disappointed.”

“you know i’m not like that.”

“don’t give me space. that’s the last thing i want with you.”

“i know you still love me.”

“i can’t think straight with you.”

“why are you so stubborn?”

“don’t do this here.”

“trust me on this.”

“please don’t misunderstand me.”

“you… you never had a problem with it before.”

“i know i shouldn’t be here.”

“what do you mean by that?”

“you deserve more.”

“can you just kiss me? one last time? that’s all i ask.”

“i’m scared.”

“i swear i’ll do things different this time.”

“s/he’s beautiful. i hope s/he makes you happy.”

“i want to believe you, i do.”

“not everyone is going to hurt you.”

“i’m… i’m trying. i really am.”

“i can’t sleep.”

“how long will this go on for?”

“can i hug you?”

“do you ever mean the things you say?”

“you won’t understand.”

“you’re making me think that what they told me about you was right.”

“am i too late?”

[starscar-a]

       ▌✫ —; ( outof✞s. );;          hello yes long time no chat.     i have no excuses.     actually i do.     my job is incredibly physically taxing,  and typically the last thing that i want to do when i get home is write some angsty teenager hashing out whether or not he’s a good person.     for that i’m incredibly sorry,  to you lot and to allen himself.     also formatting just drains me tbh.     i’m a much more active roleplayer on discord.     i can also answer periodically on break at work!     just not when i’m on the floor.     ANYWAY.     yes.     allen.     my child is still very much alive,  and i’m going to try to get back to being active here.     i’m not sure anyone even really remembers me, to be honest.     a lot has happened since i last really signed in here.     so going forward,  i’ll hopefully be much more available.     but for right now ...                                                        i just ... really ... need someone ...                                                                            to rant to about dgm ...                                                                                         … someone ask for my discord plz.