I'm not sure if you follow me on Tumblr, so I'm not sure if you're even going to see this. If you do, at least you'll know how I ACTUALLY feel right now.Â
If my best friend came to me and told me that the guy I was seeing attempted to rape her, I would NEVER be able to look at that guy the same way again. I would NEVER be able to kiss him again, or touch him again, or even look at him again without feeling sick to my stomach and thinking about what he did. The second I knew what happened, the second I saw the pain in her eyes and heard it in her voice...I would be done. It would not matter how happy he made me, or how beautiful he made me feel. There are millions of MEN out there, I would not settle for the pathetic sack of shit who emotionally scarred my best fucking friend.
I still have nightmares about that night. I have nightmares about it going farther than it did. Yeah, it was an ATTEMPTED rape. That does NOT make it any less scary, it  does NOT make it any less terrible.
I understand that I told you that I didn't want you to choose sides, but you're my best friend. I NEED YOU ON MY SIDE. I expected you to take MY side, just like I would take yours in an instant. I can feel myself losing you.
You guys act like I'm being too hard on him, but I have to be...you watched me walk away in tears because I have literally no choice other than to shut out one of my best friends because of something awful. I HATE this. Do you think I WANT to tear the group apart? Do you think I WANT to lose my best friend since seventh grade? Because I DON'T.Â
UGH.
