hayden stavros

35. mobster.

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

Phoebe took a deep breath, her eyes closing involuntarily at his touch. She always felt like he was afraid to even touch her so she never really had a chance to feel him, to feel his hands on her. But now he’s touching her and she feels a tingle shoot up her spine. “You don’t have to be better, you are enough,” she told him honestly. He was more than enough, even if he didn’t believe it or he thought she shouldn’t believe that Phoebe knew in her heart that he was a good man. He was the first man who had made her feels safe while also adding excitement to her life. He was so different from anyone she’d ever met, a mysterious man with surely a lot she didn’t know, but one who respected her and had gone out of his way to get to know her. No one had ever gone out of their way to get to know Phoebe, not like this. Her eyes dropped to his lips, full and plump and so close. She wanted to kiss him more than she had wanted to kiss anyone in her whole life. Her eyes moved up to his again, holding his gaze as her hand came up to cup his cheek, one thumb grazing over the corner of his mouth. “Hayden,” she murmured his name softly. “Kiss me.” 

The words that left her mouth were far from the truth, but he couldn’t tell her any different. He wouldn’t tell her any different. If she knew who he really was, maybe she would run away. Or maybe she wouldn’t. Phoebe was the most difficult woman to peg and that still hadn’t stopped Hayden from wanting to know her, from wanting to be with her. Everything about her drew him in and now he was the one that was scared of the situation. His family was nothing to want to be a part of. Hell, he barely considered himself a decent person. Every time he so much stepped foot inside that flower shop, he was sure her mother was going to beat his ass just for being who he was. He was darkness seeping into the light and he couldn’t help himself. The woman would have to deal now, especially given the current moment. His eyes met hers as she looked at him, those beautiful brown eyes swallowing him whole. He wanted to know everything about her. Every thought that ran through her head intrigued him. Her hand resting on his cheek made his eyes dart towards that for only a moment before looking back at her. If she hadn’t said his name like that with those words, he probably would have been able to withstand kissing her until they were in private. However, she had done exactly that with her thumb ever so gently caressing his lips. “Phoebe...” He looked down at her mouth for only a second. “Like I said, you’re going to be the death of me,” he said as he pressed his mouth to hers. He was sure this was the moment where he knew he was going to fall. But it would be the greatest fall he would ever know.

[benbarnxs]

Ben Barnes as Benjamin Greene in Gold Digger Ep. 1, Her Boy.

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

“Hayden,” she said his name softly like it would hurt him if she spoke it any louder. She felt like she was in a dream and any second now she’d awaken and everything would float away. She wanted to hold onto him but she felt the fear was unfounded, just something her mind had conjured up. “You have no reason to be. I’m here. Constantly being drawn to you even through your countless warnings. Even though sometimes it was discouraging to hear you talk about yourself the way you do even though you have been nothing but sweet to me.” And every time they’d met Phoebe could feel herself be taken in just a little more. “I don’t know you, your deepest secrets, that’s true. And I won’t say it’s not important because it is but it is unfair for you to try to make decisions for me. To push me away like I am not capable of making my own decisions regarding who I want to be around. I’ve had decisions be made for me my entire life, Hayden. And with you, I wanted to be the one to choose, to let my heart decide. And you didn’t let me.” She took a deep breath, bringing her other hand up to cradle his face. She’d never really let herself admit this before but he was so beautiful. Those near-black eyes felt like they were swallowing her whole and she wanted nothing less. “And I understand that you’re scared. But I’m right here. I’m here, Hayden, and I have all these feelings for you and I’m not going anywhere.” 

Hayden had never been afraid of anything before in his life. Everything had all but been handed to him on a silver platter. Sure, he had been the black sheep of his family, but he had made a name for himself in this city. And here came this woman wearing a flower crown making him doubt everything. All he could really know for sure was that he was completely enamored by her. Every word she said made him feel like he was wrong for her and good for her at the same time. Maybe if they both didn’t have all of these feelings running through their veins, they wouldn’t be in this predicament right now. Maybe if he didn’t have his brothers breathing down his neck making him doubt everything, he wouldn’t have tried to push her away. There were so many things telling him not to fall into this with Phoebe, but here she was telling him otherwise. His eyes could only focus on hers as she spoke, his ears hanging onto every single syllable that left her mouth. Once she was done, he lifted his hands to rest on the sides of her neck, his dark eyes scanning her face. “I don’t want you to go anywhere. I’m sorry I made you feel like you couldn’t choose to do what you wanted. You deserve better from me. I promise I’ll be better for you. I swear on my life.” He so desperately wanted to press his lips to hers, but he wasn’t going to let that be his choice. This was going to be at her pace and he would let her make that move whenever she was ready.

[sarahsjohnb]

I think when preparing to play any role, the most basic of steps is to ask how you would feel in any given scenario. I think finding a language for talking about emotive reactions was an extremely useful unconscious gift from my parents.  — Ben Barnes photographed by John Russo for Gio Journal

[bnbrns]

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

She tried and tried to no avail to stop crying but the tears just kept coming. She dialed her friend’s number multiple times but the calls wouldn’t even go through, so here she was. Alone and upset, wearing a skimpy dress she didn’t feel comfortable in all to impress a man who either didn’t want her or just wanted to play a game. She took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself, head swimming and emotions swirling. And she realized why she was so upset and angry. It was because she liked him, liked him so much and she thought he liked her too. And it wasn’t because she was trying to rebel against her mother or because he was dangerous and that was new to her. It was simply because he had been kind to her, was funny, was interesting, that she had found herself falling, a feeling she’d never experienced before. And when she saw him again right there in front of her again, her heart clenched. “You are,” she spoke again, head a little less fuzzy. “You are a coward because you did all those things, and you knew, you knew how I felt. And– and I think you feel the same way. And I’m not scared, though you keep implying I should be. Because for once in my life I can trust my feelings because they are mine and they are real. But you’re scared, Hayden.” She looked at him now, really looked at his face as she raised a palm up to rest against his cheek. “What are you so afraid of?” 

Hayden was, for lack of a better word, fucked. It had always been easy for him to just live his life without any strings attached. With the life he led, it was just simple for him to find a different woman every night so he didn’t get attached to anyone. And he did not, at all, want Phoebe to be involved with anything he was doing. He had served enough time in hell to know how it would feel for her to be involved in something she didn’t really want to be involved in. They weren’t the same person though. They were completely different from each other and that was why this was such a struggle for him. However, listening to Phoebe speak changed things for him. After all he had said and here she stood in front of him still calling him a coward. It was what he deserved and it was true. Hayden tried his best to convince himself that he was trying to save her from this life he led. The funny thing was that she didn’t need to be. It was clear to him now that she didn’t care about any of that. There was something about him, and he didn’t know what it could possibly be, that drew her to him. He knew what made him want her, but he couldn’t figure out why she would want him for the life of him. Her hand resting on his cheek made him lift his dark eyes to look into hers. “I’m not...” He shook his head. It was stupid of him to deny anything now. It was almost like she could read him like a book. “I’m afraid of you. Of anything I could feel for you in the future. I’m afraid of you.”

[spellofwinter-deactivated202605]

All those battle scars, and not one on this pretty face.

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

Phoebe felt like she was going through a rollercoaster of emotions at the moment. Every word he spoke made her feel something different and in the end, the only emotion she was left with that she could name was confusion. One second they were dancing and the next he was standing in front of her looking grim and refusing to meet her eyes. What was she meant to make of this situation? She searched his face for some kind of answer as to what had just happened, after all, they’d just been dancing. But maybe it was her fault, surely it was. She didn’t have much experience with men and maybe in her bravery, she’d done the wrong thing, said the wrong thing. Maybe, though, maybe it was him. Maybe he just didn’t like her or didn’t wanna be around her any longer. Phoebe eyed their still intertwined hands and when he spoke something like anger filled her body. She wasn’t familiar with the feeling, she rarely got angry but she was now. Angry and also sad. And suddenly very tired. She wanted to go home now but she couldn’t go back dressed like this and her friend was nowhere to be seen. Maybe she’d wait outside while Heidy found her and they could go home together. “You keep saying that,” she started, body still buzzing with the unfamiliar anger. “But I think you’re just a coward.” With that, she pulled her hands away from his and turned, searching her bag for her phone as she made her way out of the club. And once she was outside her emotions overwhelmed her so much that she felt tears roll down her cheeks. “Stupid, stupid,” she whispered to herself. 

Liquid courage. That was exactly what he needed. His brother had such a hold on him, he felt like he was always being pulled towards what he shouldn’t be doing. It was exhausting and he was fed up with it. Hayden headed towards the bar, immediately asking for a shot. “You don’t need her. We’re kings, Hayden. The sooner you learn that, the better.” Hayden took his shot and downed it immediately. “Shut the fuck up, Dick. If I wanted your opinion, I would have asked for it.” He walked away from his brother to run into his youngest brother. He assumed his imposition told Gio to move out of his way because he simply did. Hayden followed the direction he saw Phoebe head in, his eyes dropping upon every face he saw on his way. The people moved out of his way because they just knew who he was, but of course there were a few women that wanted to interrupt his mission to find her. All he could do was pry them off of him so he could just find Phoebe. That was all he cared to do. Once he got outside and saw that red dress, he headed towards her to stand in front of her. “I’m not a fucking coward.” He looked at her face to see she had started crying. It was his fault this had happened. He couldn’t even blame it on his brother because he was a grown ass adult. This was all on him. “If I was a coward, I wouldn’t have bothered with you at all. I wouldn’t have spent nights looking for you in a sea of people I couldn’t care less about. I wouldn’t have stopped by a flower shop I had no interest in being at letting your mother drag me through the fucking dirt constantly. I have been trying and trying, Phoebe. So just...don’t go. Please. Give me the opportunity to fix this.”

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

She shook her head, unable to conceal her smile because truthfully, she didn’t doubt that. He was very handsome and she was sure it didn’t take a lot of work for him to just look like that. Though she wouldn’t be telling him that for fear of putting her foot into her own mouth. Phoebe followed his lead, hips swaying easily to the music, something like courage rushing through her veins. What was it about this man that made her want to throw all caution to the wind? “I think I’ve got a good partner.” He was so close now that if she just moved her body centimeters back their bodies would be flush together, much like how many people here were dancing. The idea was enticing. Once he intertwined their hands, Phoebe made a decision, courage still coursing through her body and possibly making her blind to what was and what wasn’t a good decision. But right now, everything seemed unimportant except for the two of them, right here. She tightened her grip on his hands and used that to pull his body towards her, or maybe she was pushing her body into his but in the matter of a second, her back was flush to his chest. “Hayden,” she all but breathed, her head resting back on his shoulder so she could look at his face, heat pooling in her belly at his words. 

Hayden gave a nonchalant shrug at her words. “I’ve got a little practice.” The words left his mouth before he could stop them. He only hoped that she wouldn’t care what he meant by that. It wasn’t like he was a saint by any means, but he was not going to let her think something different of him from what she already had in her head. “You’re my favorite partner though,” he said to somehow cover it up. Not that it should’ve mattered to him, but he wanted to impress her. Something about her drew him in. Maybe it was because they were two entirely different people or maybe it was just her. Nevertheless, he wanted to be around her. The distance closing between them made him open his eyes to look into hers. “Phoebe.” His eyes flicked down to her mouth for only a moment before he heard a commotion only he knew was happening at the bar where his brother was standing. It was nothing to worry about at all, but the look on his older brother’s face made him question everything he was doing right now. Why was he infatuated with this woman? It was enough for him to semi-pull away from her to the point where they were stood in front of each other now. There still wasn’t much distance between them, but it was enough for right now. He cleared his throat as he tried to look at anywhere but her. HIs eyes eventually settled on the floor, his hand still linked with hers for some reason. It was like he was trying to let go, but still couldn’t at the same time. “Phoebe.” His eyes then locked on his brother’s from across the room. “I’m not good for you. This isn’t where you belong.”

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

Here he was, sweet-talking again. She didn’t mind it, of course, not being used to the attention of a man like this. It was somewhat exhilarating. Phoebe laughed, shaking her head at his words. “Oh, no effort at all, huh?” She teased, giving him a once over in a spout of bravery. When he moved again, Phoebe let out a small gasp. His hands resting on her body made her shiver and she hoped to whatever god was up there that he hadn’t noticed that. And Phoebe minded a lot, but not for the reasons he probably thought she might. “I don’t mind,” she said, almost breathlessly, finding it hard to breathe through the charged air. The music was booming and she did her best to move her body to the beat of the music. “I might not be the best partner for this particular type of dancing, however, so I must apologize beforehand,” she said, turning her head to the side and moving closer so he could hear her better. Or so she told herself. 

“None at all. I basically just wake up looking this handsome. It’s a burden really,” he stated with a shrug. The smile on his face made it obvious that he was joking. He didn’t want her to think he was the kind of guy that thought like that when he indeed was not. The jolt he felt when he put his hands on her hips almost made him pull away. Well, that was until she spoke. “That’s relieving,” he muttered under his breath. Hayden had to lean his head down to hear her better. Not that he minded being closer to her. God, he did not mind being closer to her at all. “It’s okay. It’s all in the hips. You just kinda sway.” He slowly started moving, his mouth near her ear as he spoke. His hands that were on her hips attempted to help her move along with him. “It’s, uh...” He took a breath. “It’s pretty easy once you get the hang of it. I’m sure you’ll be a great partner. It all depends on the person you’re dancing with.” Hayden knew there was music playing, but he could barely focus on anything but her. His eyes closed as his hand drifted down to hers to intertwine their fingers. “You’re going to be the death of me,” he whispered, not even caring that he said it loud enough for her to hear anymore.

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

She looked at him, smile shy and she was so glad the club was dark because she knew her cheeks had reddened a bit. He was just a sweet talker, she was sure, but his words affected her nonetheless. Her eyes trailed his face, from his sharp jaw to the high cheekbones, eyes barely skimming his full lips for a mere second, like the simple look was dangerous. He was dangerous, she knew that. And Phoebe had only seen him a few times, she had to get a hold of herself. Part of her wondered if she was having her rebellious phase too long, longing for a guy who her mother would hate. And a part of her wondered if it was normal to feel this connection, infatuation, with someone so quickly. “Thank you,” she blushed furiously. “You look handsome as well.” Phoebe bit down on her bottom lip, worrying it between her teeth. “Yes, I’d love to dance.” 

There were so many expressions running over her face that Hayden wasn’t sure what was going through her mind. It was hard to see much in this lighting anyway so it made seeing anything difficult. He had definitely noticed the flush fall over her face though, but he chose not to say anything. If there was one thing he didn’t want to do, it was embarrass her when he had her in the palm of his hand at the moment. Then again, maybe it was the other way around. After all, he was the one who had been looking for her. “No problem. I only tell the truth.” It was hard for him to keep his eyes situated on hers given her current attire, but it was also fairly easy at the same time. He was infatuated and he could not help it in the slightest. Would he ever admit that out loud? Hell no. “Thanks. I barely put in any effort really,” he joked with a slight grin lifting onto his face. At her agreement with them dancing, Hayden moved closer to her. “This isn’t the kind of place where you tango, you know.” He circled her until he was standing behind her again, his hands gently resting on her hips. “Do you mind?”

[stavroshayden]

phoebexparker‌:

Often times, Phoebe was good. Good as in listened to her mother and her friends, went to work, took care of her flowers, went home. Sometimes, though, sometimes she did more than that. Tonight she’d asked her friend Heidy, the only one she knew who frequented these kinds of places if they could go out. She’d even chosen the place, her mind swirling with memories of tall, dark and handsome, something dangerous and exciting pooling in her belly. Her mother thought she was simply sleeping over her friend’s house but currently, she was feeling the bass of the music from the club underneath her skin and though this was all new to her, she was buzzing with excitement.  Heidy had gotten her into a tight, dark red lacy piece which she’d never have put on herself for it was too low on the top and too high on the bottom but she had to admit she looked good in it. At the sound of a familiar voice, she turned her head slightly. She couldn’t see him clearly but his presence was as unmistakable as his voice. “Oh I- well. My friend is very convincing, really. Though I’m afraid she’s left me all alone, again.” 

“Left you alone again? Well, that’s just not nice. I would never leave you alone. That would just be foolish of me, wouldn’t it?” His dark eyes trailed down her body before focusing back on her eyes. The dress surely was distracting, but he definitely tried his best to focus on her actual face right now. Not that that was any less of a hindrance. In all honesty, Hayden found Phoebe entirely distracting. His brother was right in saying he was slightly obsessed. It wasn’t the kind of obsession where he wanted to spend every waking minute with her. No, it was the kind where he just felt good being around her. Something about Phoebe made him feel warm inside. It was a feeling he hadn’t had in a long while and it was one he didn’t want to get rid of. The two of them couldn’t have been further from the same person and yet, here they were. Or here he was. She was innocent and he was...not. It was a wonder to him how he even got her to want to be around him. “You look lovely tonight,” he said, his eyes never leaving hers. “You wanna dance?”

[stavroshayden]

Dark brown eyes scanned the club for one specific woman as if she would make an appearance just from him willing her there. A tap on his shoulder brought him out of his daze as he looked at the person who had done it. It was his brother of course, but he chose to ignore him for the moment and go back to what he had been so rudely interrupted from doing. “Don’t interrupt me. Can’t you see I’m busy?” Hayden grabbed the whiskey from in front of him to take a sip, his eyes looking for just one person. “Anyone ever tell you you’re obsessed little brother?” He simply rolled his eyes. “Obsession would mean I can’t stop thinking about her. I could actually stop thinking about her. I mean, I could easily find anyone else in this room and—” There she was. He immediately stopped talking to his brother and headed in the direction of the one and only Parker, Phoebe Parker. Once he got over to her, he leaned down from behind her to speak so she could hear him. “I’m flattered you took the time to come see me.”

[fondlylupin]

[bnbrns]