StephCampos @stephcampos - Tumblr Blog

ablogofnature

Http://www.instagram.com/p/adkilqqbhv

hilarioushumorfromouterspace

thelibrarina

And the children with no internet access at home do…what?

squeeful

You can mandate online classes when you make high speed internet a public utility. Until then, fuck off and give them their snow days.

parakeet

today a regular customer came into my store and told me she’d ‘finished candy crush’ and tbh i didnt think that was possible. i thought it just generated levels forever, but apparently it has 4000 odd levels and it took her 4 years to complete. she even emailed them asking when there would be more levels and they told her she could play their other games or replay the existing levels jklsdkflsdf

patron-saint-of-smart-asses-dea

the only true gamer

unclefather

what;s the point of having animals if you won’t let them on the furniture, you stupid bitch

taylortut

y’all know that john mulaney quote “the things crazy people say mean nothing to them but everything to me?”

every time i hear that quote, i think about how i got this light-up pen

taylortut

i got this pen four years ago when i was working as a barista at starbucks. I was on the registers and taking the order of this woman, who ordered a nonfat latte, because she was “watching her weight”

so this guy behind her, whom no one was talking to, for some fucking reason says “wathing your weight? but what about the wait for your watch?“ (which is a completely unhinged response. like just complete Mad Hatter nonsense)

anyway this lady gets really uncomfortable and of the five people (me, him, her, the other checker, and the customer at the other register) who were now sucked into the uncomfortable silence, i decided that i should alleviate the tension by saying “you can’t wait for a watch; you don’t have the time”

and then he said “oh, quick girl!”, gave me that pen, got out of line, and left without ordering anything

patron-saint-of-smart-asses-dea

You pleased a mad fae trickster

theinturnetexplorer

Growing up with Pets

sarahbbean

@cbushereicome

mxuniverse13

i wanted this post to never end

swifterharmony

SO PRECIOUS

childhoodruiner

source

buhbee-deactivated20180422

i make 1 typing error

buhbee-deactivated20180422

One.

boymilk-moved-deactivated201903

axleheart

espressogal

once you stop fantasizing about that ideal version of yourself and start working towards becoming that person by setting your alarm clock earlier and actually going to the gym and actually volunteering at places and actually eating healthier and not procrastinating and working just a little bit harder you’ll realize that it was so easy all along. becoming your ideal self will only ever exist in your mind until you make the decision to work towards becoming that person. get up!! get going!! it’s now or never!! there is no light at the end of the tunnel!! get that flashlight and pave your own path bitch bc no one else is going to do it for u!!