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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (10x03 sneak peek)

‘Bout time Sam had a wake-up call. Maybe realized the whole world doesn’t revolve around him…that maybe he’s the reason they live such a shit life.

queen-of-carven-stone

I… Alright, boys and girls, take a seat, because class is in session. Point one - the previous responder’s claim that Sam thinks the world revolves around him - Sam. The one who says ‘I’m the least of any of you,’ when consigning himself to eternal torture with the Devil to save the world. Sam, who didn’t want to mention his hallucinations of said Devil because he didn’t want to add to Dean’s burdens. Sam, who stuck with Dean through thick and thin, always coming back no matter how much Dean hurt him. Sam, who undertook the Trials to close the gates of Hell so that Dean would be proud of him, because he couldn’t bear letting him down again. Sam, who worked with Dean after Dean violated him, who set aside his own issues and trauma because there was a much bigger threat to deal with. Point two - Sam is the reason that the Winchesters have a shit life - I don’t know if you missed this in biology and health ed, but babies don’t really get a choice in being born. Literally. They don’t get the choice, because their mother’s body decides to kick them out, and their mother makes the choice to push them out. And, y’know, not get an abortion at some point during the first trimester. Fast forwarding six months, Sam did not make the choice for Azazel to come into his nursery and kill Mary. In fact, Mary was the one who led to that, because she made a deal with Azazel to bring John back. Sam’s entire existence had been orchestrated by Heaven and Hell for decades, if not more, so that Michael and Lucifer could have their grudge match. So, what? Should Sam have killed himself to deprive Lucifer of his vessel? Before he even knew he was a vessel? Should Sam have killed himself so that John wouldn’t hunt for Azazel? Because Sam didn’t know anything about their life until he was eight. Should he have killed himself when Lucifer came to him the first time, when Lucifer explicitly told him that he’d resurrect him? How should he have removed himself from the picture? Should he have stayed dead at Cold Oak? That wasn’t his choice, Dean brought him back. Should he have not tried to find a way to save Dean from eternal torture? Sam specifically stayed out of Dean’s life for a year, so that he could build a life with Lisa and Ben. He only stepped in when Dean’s life was in danger, and Dean was the one who made the choice to return to hunting. Dean’s life sucked because he chose to stay in a life that was hurting him. And every time Sam tried to remove himself from the picture, Dean dragged him back. And there’s the bell, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

jared-sunshine-padalecki-deacti

*points* THIS!!! As for the Sam hater who obviously hasn’t even been watching the same show as the rest of us, take your hate elsewhere cuz it’s not welcome here. *I’m in such a bad mood today and seeing Sam hate yet again, especially Sam hate that’s downright stupid, is pissing me off even more*

dorkmisha

this moment was all about dean fighting the demon inside him so i’d like to point out a few things:

on the 1st gif dean is finally healed, his black demon eyes go away.

on the 2nd gif the old dean comes back for the first time with a soft and sincere look although he still thinks he’s a demon so he kinda doubts himself for a second or two until sam sprays him with holy water.

on the 4th gif he realizes that holy water can no longer affect him and that he’s human again.

on the 5th gif all his emotions return, he immediately regret the things he did as a demon.

and on the 6th gif, naturally, he tries to keep his feelings intact to show that he’s strong with a little jaw clench.

oh the old dean winchester is back alright, just an even more self loathing version and i’m afraid that it’s just going to keep getting worse and worse from here.

orangejuiceaholic-deactivated20

the best part is you can even tell what is happening in each of the gifs because jensen is sUCH AN AMAZING ACTOR I CANT EVEN

whenshiphitsthefan

So first demon!Dean wants to kill Sam and rather than the First Blade, he’s all:

But then he decides to use a weapon after all.

“Yes, I’ll cleave him.”

"Nah… Oh, I know!

"I’ll nail him to the wall.”

nothingidputbeforeyou

Trying to kill Sam is Dean’s biggest regret from his time as a demon, but there are plenty of other issues bothering him.

taronunwin

hargrieve

let’s talk about five watching his siblings die.

by the end of season two, he has seen all of his siblings dead THREE TIMES. the last two were over the span of a few days.

the first time was of course when he time-travelled for the first time. just a few minutes after seeing his teenage siblings perfectly healthy and alive at the academy, he’s suddenly in front of the wreckage of the mansion surrounded by all of their dead adult counterparts. for the first time, he’s in a dangerous and unknown situation alone without his siblings. he spends the next 45 years of his life figuring out how to go back to save them from the apocalypse. during his entire adult life both in the apocalypse and with the commission, five never loses sight of his goal to save his family. he risks everything to go back to 2019, knowing that the commission will send assassins after him for trying to change the timeline. when the handler appears and makes him a terrible deal, he accepts it on the condition that his family survives. it’s 45 years later and five would still do ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING to save his siblings.

the second time was mere seconds after watching vanya destroy the world the first time around. five lands in dallas, hoping that his crackpot plan worked and his siblings are safe, only to find that they’re in the middle of nuclear war and the city is literally about to be obliterated with a nuke. to prevent this second doomsday, he tirelessly searches for and convinces and cajoles all of his siblings to gather together. he looks to reginald to give him advice on time travel. when that doesn’t pan out, he cuts a deal with the handler to assassinate the board, even though he clearly does not want to deal in unnecessary violence anymore. he makes an enormous personal sacrifice only to be duped into having no time at all to get everyone together with the briefcase, and then to have his siblings fail to show up again. he STILL doesn’t give up, instead deciding to go after his own past self despite knowing both the dangers of encountering himself as an assassin and all of the risks of paradox psychosis. it has now been fourteen days since he decided to jump to 2019, and (other than a couple scenes with dolores) five has had no other personal agenda except to save his uncooperative, scattered dumbasses of siblings.

the third time was at the farm, right when five thought they were safe. both of vanya’s doomsdays had been prevented; vanya had knocked out all of the commission’s agents; they had lila surrounded and diego had almost talked her down. their biggest immediate threats were gone, they were all together, and they should have been safe for the moment. instead, the handler waltzes through the door and guns down all of his siblings RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM. the handler has always been his problem, and now his siblings were all dead because he had inadvertently brought the handler into their lives. now, even as he lies dying, he again attempts something he’s never done before to save his family.

five lives through decades of hell with the singleminded goal to save his family, yet has to watch them die THREE TIMES. the worst part is that he’s alone in this experience every single time and bears the burden of witnessing their deaths by himself.

(bonus for five not being there when ben died. when he read about it in vanya’s book, he must have wondered whether he could have saved ben if he’d been able to be on that mission.)

anyway five’s character arc makes me WEEP

prettyasice-deactivated20230416

foxpunk

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