I'm Still Doing Science

An independent blog for 3 Portal 2 original characters left behind after Chel's escape.

[stilldoingapplescience]

In regards to Him's brain damage symptoms-It varies from day to day in terms of severity and includes:

- Temporary mutism

- Lapses in memory

- Dyscalculia

- Cluster headaches

- Lethargy

- Hyperacuity

- Vision/hearing loss

- Mood swings

- Visual/Audio Hallucinations

It should be noted that at no point has it actually affected his intelligence in any meaningful way. He might struggle to express it, but this man is still the shrewd quantum physicist who once deliberately designed fatal test chambers to impress his crush.

Him: I'm extra doomed bc the experiment that keeps me alive and invulnerable is both the thing repairing my brain AND damaging it! It damages my brain automatically bc the science is not conducive to life, but to keep me functioning as invulnerable it has to fix that damage! Which it then redoes! I will never be free of these symptoms unless I find something that can auto-kill me!

Weschelbalg: plz don't do that babe

Warden: plz do babe

[stilldoingapplescience]

Mun is back in her Greek mythology phase again and remembering Him is Greek and not interested in the religion of his parents. (Most likely Greek Orthodox Jew)

Which means, if he ascribed to any kind of religion at all, he might have leaned on his country's original gods.

Doctor Hieronymous Falurian with his tiny shrine to Athena in his office while he plans and details all the ways to creatively kill test volunteers to impress his boss/crush for science and reasoning that if he was really doing something that bad

she'd show up to stop him, right? His intellect and grasp on manipulating the fabric of the universe is clearly a sign that Athena favors him, so she's clearly watching him. If she doesn't show up to stop him, he can't be doing anything too bad....no matter how Warden complains about it.

Brain damaged Him discovering decades after the fact that Athena never showed up literally because she disapproved of him. She's not mad that he killed so many people with the gifts she gave him, she's just...disappointed.

He leaned on the gifts the gods gave him, and effectively acted like he was a god. He decided who lived and died, he manipulated the fabric of the universe, and if you were a hero who overcame his divine tests he changed the world so no you didn't....then the tables were turned and he faced the consequences of his actions.

And Athena looking on him from a distance the whole time. She finally comes to talk to him and his pride is broken and he's been brought back to the attitude he had at the beginning-thanks to brain damage he's the same naive new employee who giddily whispered all his research to his tiny owl Athena shrine in the middle of the night while he worked overtime to bring his inventions to fruition. It's like the man he became is a completely different person. And only Weschelbalg seems to bluntly acknowledge they're the same person without disapproving. (he approves of anything Him wants tho)

like

introducing the gods back to these guys is so wild bc after all of that, how exactly is Athena supposed to react? She saw one of her children rise to power and fall and get reset back to where he was before. HOW DOES SHE REACT TO THIS, EMOTIONALLY?

[shohaizono]

Him approaches with a large brown small boulder-looking thing in his arms; it's about the size of a medium dog or something, "I brought you a gift! This was one of the potatoes from the facility that was found to have absolutely no toxins or irregularities. I thought you'd like it!"

@stilldoingapplescience

Sho stares at it, eyes widening a bit. "That's gotta be record breaking or something. You sure it's fine for me to take it?"

It'd definitely let him experiment a bit with what he can do with potato dishes, though...

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him laughs, "nah, this isn't even the biggest one we have down there. But it's completely clean and I can carry it," he pats the potato lightly. "I mentioned that before your food truck I ate like...almost exclusively potatoes, right? See, forever ago, our office had a 'bring your child to work' day and they had a science contest and like 75% of them made potato batteries. Anyways they grew out of control down there and it's the only sustainable food source we have now."

He grins, "do you want more? I can bring you more potatoes if you want? I mean, I'll have to check them first, obviously-there's a lot of weird chemicals in Aperture and I know you won't want any of that getting into people's food."

[shohaizono]

An excited man in an orange jumpsuit with a circular logo stares at Sho's menu, "What's the best here? I haven't had any food other than potatoes in literal decades so I'm eager to get some real food..."

@stilldoingapplescience

Ah, a new customer. Maybe some sort of janitor?

"Well, the most popular menu item is the chicken over rice. Would you like to order that?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Chicken over rice? Him knows it's simple, but after 25 years (he's pretty sure) of nothing but potatoes it sounds like ambrosia. "That sounds amazing! Vόστιμος!"

Him checks his pockets, and inspects the money the pretty man in red had reluctantly allowed him to take with him from the casino. "I'd love the chicken and rice, how much will I owe you for it?"

[shohaizono]

"Thousand yen," Sho answers, turning back into the truck to portion it out. He makes sure to include utensils and a napkin before turning around again to collect the money and hand over the food.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Thousand yen, thousand yen....Him digs the money from his pocket and stares at the numbers. He's usually fine, but once in a while his vision goes all screwy with text or numbers and it doesn't go away for hours. He wishes he'd been warned this was a possible side effect of his brain damage. "Oh god the dyscalculia is back...."

He stares at the money for a long moment, places it on the counter and squints at it. Thank God this didn't happen at the casino; he'd be broke if he had abruptly lost the ability to comprehend numbers back there. ".... I'm so sorry, my brain went funny again and I can't read numbers, how much of this is enough?"

[shohaizono]

Sho grabs two bills from the stack and slides the rest back. If this guy's a Darkwick employee... it should be fine to skim off the top a little.

"This should be good. Hope you enjoy."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him watches him and tries to figure out if that was the right amount given or not but the longer he looks at the numbers on the money the more his head hurts. Sho probably took the money he swore he did! Him is choosing to trust him and his honest face.

"Thanks a bunch!" He tucks the money into his pocket and grabs the food, turning to look for a place to sit and eat, finally offering a better view of the logo on his back.

Aperture Science

"We do what we must because we can"

Him hums to himself, wondering if he should portal up to a roof or find a bench.

[shohaizono]

Sho calls out to the customer before he leaves. "By the way, what's your name? Haven't seen you around before."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him glances back at him, "Oh, I'm Hieronymous Falurian!" He waves, "I guess I don't actually work here, I'm from Aperture Science, but I'm here to find some supplies and whatnot. It was supposed to be a quick trip, but I haven't eaten real food in SO LONG."

He should probably portal somewhere to eat, shouldn't he? He steps back to talk to Sho better, and also check if there was a better surface to cast a portal on near the food truck, "and if my name's hard, don't worry about it, I know it's kinda ostentatious. Lots of my coworkers struggled with it all the time too. You can call me Him. Everyone does! Well, the humans call me Him. The AIs...." He trails off.

[shohaizono]

"Aperture Science...? Haven't heard of it."

How the fuck do these random people keep ending up here..? Well... as long as he's not dangerous it should be fine.

"I'm Sho."

[stilldoingapplescience]

"I'm not surprised, our company technically went defunct years ago. We were bought out after our founder and CEO died, and also some....stuff happened...." Him waves it off; the details of the collapse of the management structure never really affected him that much, the AIs and bots and everything stayed standing, along with like 86% of the test chambers and facility, for better or worse. Him really isn't sure where he stands on the existence of the mantis men.

"Nice to meet you, Sho! You're a really swell guy, y'know that? Aperture is probably only gonna be here for a little while, sort of like on a contract basis, but I'm gonna miss you when I leave." Assuming his memory allows him to, he supposes.

[shohaizono]

Well... definitely suspicious, but he's friendly and doesn't seem dangerous.

"Well, if you're ever free and feel like elaborating on that stuff that happened, drop by. I'm usually here during the day, and class time is typically pretty slow."

The honor student's voice came into his mind, 'Sho, you should be in class, too!'

... hard pass.

Plus, it gives him the opportunity to learn more about whoever this guy is and why he's here.

"I'll see you around."

[stilldoingapplescience]

"No problem! I'd love to have guests visit the facility, too, if you're up for it, Sho!" Ohhh awake living humans in Aperture again, what a dream that would be. "We've got some cool toys to play with if you're into that. Or I could just show you some of the old test chambers. Anything but going to class, huh?" Him grins, cheekily sticking out his tongue briefly before looking around and firing off the portal gun in a seemingly random direction.

He inspects the direction carefully, then shoots a blue portal towards the pale pillar nearest the food truck. The pillar was probably either a remnant of a previous building, or even just random decor, but it was the perfect size and color to host a portal. The image of a rooftop fenced off area appears and Him gives a soft cheer. "Anyways, if you do get into the facility, remember to talk loud and clear to the AI in the ceiling so he can make sure you don't get into anything too dangerous, and I'll come meet you. See you around, Sho!"

He steps through the portal and after a moment it closes almost as an afterthought.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him thinking "wait do we have legal recourse to do stuff to the Aperture devices at Darkwick, since Darkwick technically bought it from the people who bought Aperture? And do the AIs have legal personhood? Would killing them be considered murder?"

Warden groans, "I don't....think so? Ask the Shinjo kid."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Warden calls Weschelbalg and Him and reluctantly admits "I know why the spatial portal opened up here. We're synced to the signals of the Aperture Science equipment Darkwick probably purchased for cheap some 20 years ago, assuming it was cursed or anomalous and thus needed to be taken off the market before anyone got hurt."

Him taps his portal gun; he almost forgot he'd put a communication device into it at the request of...he forgets his name, someone in manufacturing, "Why did they assume the equipment was anomalous?"

Weschelbalg, hanging out in the casino, his own communication running through his head with his own internal portal device, ponders his drink and sips it, "probably because they screamed. They're sentient, after all, and the idea of fully sentient manmade objects was considered practically an impossibility outside of science fiction at the time so them being anomalous is probably a decent assumption."

"Anyways, we might need to kill them or run an update to sever the active former Aperture AIs from our mainframe to properly leave permanently."

Weschelbalg snorts, "you want to kill the AIs? And you say I'm violent."

"Shut up it's an option."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Warden discussing the Aperture trio basically remaining on campus until such a time as they can repair the spatial rift and be on their merry way. Why no, it's not a dimensional rift, only a spatial one-they're from the same universe and dimension as Darkwick, just a different physical location. Why they came here specifically?

......that's a good question.

He begins searching through the boxes of supplies stored in the medical tunnels and Warden is horrified when he finds a white plastic-metal device he recognizes as a medical diagnostic tool. An Aperture Science medical diagnostic tool. He starts checking all over campus; everywhere are bits and bobs either based on Aperture Science inventions, or literally recycled Aperture devices.

An overly sensitive motion sensor light that turns on the moment a person approaches and turns off as soon as they prove they're not dangerous? That's not an anomalous light, that's an Aperture lighting fixture with a traumatized AI!

"Perhaps they didn't take us seriously when we said 'everything in Aperture has an AI' when they resold our materials...." This had to have been the new bosses. Horatio told the new owners if they wanted to sell off materials and devices they no longer needed, fine, but they needed to take responsibility for the feelings of those things they were selling. AI was put into virtually everything manufactured by Aperture, at Cave Johnson's own request, and the AI made by Horatio were nigh indistinguishable from humans at times. Making those scientific implements fully and completely sentient.

The new owners had laughed. They thought it was a joke.

And now Warden is here lecturing a traumatized light fixture by the cafeteria. It doesn't have a voice box to respond, but he can catch its sent data wirelessly as it whines about how lonely it was. He doesn't know what's worse, sentient AI being placed randomly on this campus, or the way all the humans are staring at him.

[shohaizono]

An excited man in an orange jumpsuit with a circular logo stares at Sho's menu, "What's the best here? I haven't had any food other than potatoes in literal decades so I'm eager to get some real food..."

@stilldoingapplescience

Ah, a new customer. Maybe some sort of janitor?

"Well, the most popular menu item is the chicken over rice. Would you like to order that?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Chicken over rice? Him knows it's simple, but after 25 years (he's pretty sure) of nothing but potatoes it sounds like ambrosia. "That sounds amazing! Vόστιμος!"

Him checks his pockets, and inspects the money the pretty man in red had reluctantly allowed him to take with him from the casino. "I'd love the chicken and rice, how much will I owe you for it?"

[shohaizono]

"Thousand yen," Sho answers, turning back into the truck to portion it out. He makes sure to include utensils and a napkin before turning around again to collect the money and hand over the food.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Thousand yen, thousand yen....Him digs the money from his pocket and stares at the numbers. He's usually fine, but once in a while his vision goes all screwy with text or numbers and it doesn't go away for hours. He wishes he'd been warned this was a possible side effect of his brain damage. "Oh god the dyscalculia is back...."

He stares at the money for a long moment, places it on the counter and squints at it. Thank God this didn't happen at the casino; he'd be broke if he had abruptly lost the ability to comprehend numbers back there. ".... I'm so sorry, my brain went funny again and I can't read numbers, how much of this is enough?"

[shohaizono]

Sho grabs two bills from the stack and slides the rest back. If this guy's a Darkwick employee... it should be fine to skim off the top a little.

"This should be good. Hope you enjoy."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him watches him and tries to figure out if that was the right amount given or not but the longer he looks at the numbers on the money the more his head hurts. Sho probably took the money he swore he did! Him is choosing to trust him and his honest face.

"Thanks a bunch!" He tucks the money into his pocket and grabs the food, turning to look for a place to sit and eat, finally offering a better view of the logo on his back.

Aperture Science

"We do what we must because we can"

Him hums to himself, wondering if he should portal up to a roof or find a bench.

[shohaizono]

Sho calls out to the customer before he leaves. "By the way, what's your name? Haven't seen you around before."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him glances back at him, "Oh, I'm Hieronymous Falurian!" He waves, "I guess I don't actually work here, I'm from Aperture Science, but I'm here to find some supplies and whatnot. It was supposed to be a quick trip, but I haven't eaten real food in SO LONG."

He should probably portal somewhere to eat, shouldn't he? He steps back to talk to Sho better, and also check if there was a better surface to cast a portal on near the food truck, "and if my name's hard, don't worry about it, I know it's kinda ostentatious. Lots of my coworkers struggled with it all the time too. You can call me Him. Everyone does! Well, the humans call me Him. The AIs...." He trails off.

[shohaizono]

"Aperture Science...? Haven't heard of it."

How the fuck do these random people keep ending up here..? Well... as long as he's not dangerous it should be fine.

"I'm Sho."

[stilldoingapplescience]

"I'm not surprised, our company technically went defunct years ago. We were bought out after our founder and CEO died, and also some....stuff happened...." Him waves it off; the details of the collapse of the management structure never really affected him that much, the AIs and bots and everything stayed standing, along with like 86% of the test chambers and facility, for better or worse. Him really isn't sure where he stands on the existence of the mantis men.

"Nice to meet you, Sho! You're a really swell guy, y'know that? Aperture is probably only gonna be here for a little while, sort of like on a contract basis, but I'm gonna miss you when I leave." Assuming his memory allows him to, he supposes.

[shohaizono]

An excited man in an orange jumpsuit with a circular logo stares at Sho's menu, "What's the best here? I haven't had any food other than potatoes in literal decades so I'm eager to get some real food..."

@stilldoingapplescience

Ah, a new customer. Maybe some sort of janitor?

"Well, the most popular menu item is the chicken over rice. Would you like to order that?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Chicken over rice? Him knows it's simple, but after 25 years (he's pretty sure) of nothing but potatoes it sounds like ambrosia. "That sounds amazing! Vόστιμος!"

Him checks his pockets, and inspects the money the pretty man in red had reluctantly allowed him to take with him from the casino. "I'd love the chicken and rice, how much will I owe you for it?"

[shohaizono]

"Thousand yen," Sho answers, turning back into the truck to portion it out. He makes sure to include utensils and a napkin before turning around again to collect the money and hand over the food.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Thousand yen, thousand yen....Him digs the money from his pocket and stares at the numbers. He's usually fine, but once in a while his vision goes all screwy with text or numbers and it doesn't go away for hours. He wishes he'd been warned this was a possible side effect of his brain damage. "Oh god the dyscalculia is back...."

He stares at the money for a long moment, places it on the counter and squints at it. Thank God this didn't happen at the casino; he'd be broke if he had abruptly lost the ability to comprehend numbers back there. ".... I'm so sorry, my brain went funny again and I can't read numbers, how much of this is enough?"

[shohaizono]

Sho grabs two bills from the stack and slides the rest back. If this guy's a Darkwick employee... it should be fine to skim off the top a little.

"This should be good. Hope you enjoy."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him watches him and tries to figure out if that was the right amount given or not but the longer he looks at the numbers on the money the more his head hurts. Sho probably took the money he swore he did! Him is choosing to trust him and his honest face.

"Thanks a bunch!" He tucks the money into his pocket and grabs the food, turning to look for a place to sit and eat, finally offering a better view of the logo on his back.

Aperture Science

"We do what we must because we can"

Him hums to himself, wondering if he should portal up to a roof or find a bench.

[shohaizono]

Sho calls out to the customer before he leaves. "By the way, what's your name? Haven't seen you around before."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him glances back at him, "Oh, I'm Hieronymous Falurian!" He waves, "I guess I don't actually work here, I'm from Aperture Science, but I'm here to find some supplies and whatnot. It was supposed to be a quick trip, but I haven't eaten real food in SO LONG."

He should probably portal somewhere to eat, shouldn't he? He steps back to talk to Sho better, and also check if there was a better surface to cast a portal on near the food truck, "and if my name's hard, don't worry about it, I know it's kinda ostentatious. Lots of my coworkers struggled with it all the time too. You can call me Him. Everyone does! Well, the humans call me Him. The AIs...." He trails off.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him: wow that Ritsu kid makes law sound like a religious experience

Warden: maybe you should sign the contract, then, seeing as you need Jesus desperately

[stilldoingapplescience]

@ritsu-shinjo

Him waves, "Hi, quick question: What paperwork would we need to enlist you as a legal consult? Even temporarily?" Warden can be heard whining vaguely in the background-not in the way humans do, for once, but the way a machine does when a switch you weren't supposed to press down is slammed with a fist. "Ignore him, he's always been of the opinion that the Legal Department slows us down." At one point he did too, but that was then and this is now.

[ritsu-shinjo]

“Ah fantastic!”

Ritsu has a contract handy in his little briefcase. Of course he does, he’s going to be Japan’s greatest attorney someday. You don’t get there by being unprepared, after all…

“Please sign here, and I shall absolve you of all of your sins.”

[stilldoingapplescience]

"Wow, you're prepared! And you didn't even ask who I am first!" Him looks at the contract carefully, reading it over, "Of course, I'm nowhere near what management was before everything went pear shaped. I probably won't get into the same amount of trouble the company used to before."

Unless he's entrusted with a lot of responsibilities really soon. Highly unlikely. "By the way, I can't be held responsible for the sins of my company even if I accidentally contributed to them, can I? And waivers were signed?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Someone: so what actually happened to Aperture's legal department?

Warden doesn't want to answer, partly because he never liked the legal department (they were determined to deny him legal personhood due to his entire history being able to be tracked within Aperture's property records and he held a grudge over it) and partly because he's deeply uncomfortable regarding the incidents.

They weren't all killed by the neurotoxin. At least one was killed by Weschelbalg. At least one was put through mandatory testing. The others....Warden doesn't want to say.

At least one is probably still alive, in stasis. He doesn't want to wake him up.

[stilldoingapplescience]

@ritsu-shinjo

Him waves, "Hi, quick question: What paperwork would we need to enlist you as a legal consult? Even temporarily?" Warden can be heard whining vaguely in the background-not in the way humans do, for once, but the way a machine does when a switch you weren't supposed to press down is slammed with a fist. "Ignore him, he's always been of the opinion that the Legal Department slows us down." At one point he did too, but that was then and this is now.

[stilldoingapplescience]

"Warden, do you think the law boy in red might agree to be our legal consultant if I ask nicely? We haven't had a legal department in so long."

The personality core groans, "we need the legal department back like we need Michael installed literally anywhere."

Him considers this point. "Then we need the Shinjo boy, is what you're saying."

"-NO!"

[shohaizono]

An excited man in an orange jumpsuit with a circular logo stares at Sho's menu, "What's the best here? I haven't had any food other than potatoes in literal decades so I'm eager to get some real food..."

@stilldoingapplescience

Ah, a new customer. Maybe some sort of janitor?

"Well, the most popular menu item is the chicken over rice. Would you like to order that?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Chicken over rice? Him knows it's simple, but after 25 years (he's pretty sure) of nothing but potatoes it sounds like ambrosia. "That sounds amazing! Vόστιμος!"

Him checks his pockets, and inspects the money the pretty man in red had reluctantly allowed him to take with him from the casino. "I'd love the chicken and rice, how much will I owe you for it?"

[shohaizono]

"Thousand yen," Sho answers, turning back into the truck to portion it out. He makes sure to include utensils and a napkin before turning around again to collect the money and hand over the food.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Thousand yen, thousand yen....Him digs the money from his pocket and stares at the numbers. He's usually fine, but once in a while his vision goes all screwy with text or numbers and it doesn't go away for hours. He wishes he'd been warned this was a possible side effect of his brain damage. "Oh god the dyscalculia is back...."

He stares at the money for a long moment, places it on the counter and squints at it. Thank God this didn't happen at the casino; he'd be broke if he had abruptly lost the ability to comprehend numbers back there. ".... I'm so sorry, my brain went funny again and I can't read numbers, how much of this is enough?"

[shohaizono]

Sho grabs two bills from the stack and slides the rest back. If this guy's a Darkwick employee... it should be fine to skim off the top a little.

"This should be good. Hope you enjoy."

[stilldoingapplescience]

Him watches him and tries to figure out if that was the right amount given or not but the longer he looks at the numbers on the money the more his head hurts. Sho probably took the money he swore he did! Him is choosing to trust him and his honest face.

"Thanks a bunch!" He tucks the money into his pocket and grabs the food, turning to look for a place to sit and eat, finally offering a better view of the logo on his back.

Aperture Science

"We do what we must because we can"

Him hums to himself, wondering if he should portal up to a roof or find a bench.

[shohaizono]

An excited man in an orange jumpsuit with a circular logo stares at Sho's menu, "What's the best here? I haven't had any food other than potatoes in literal decades so I'm eager to get some real food..."

@stilldoingapplescience

Ah, a new customer. Maybe some sort of janitor?

"Well, the most popular menu item is the chicken over rice. Would you like to order that?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Chicken over rice? Him knows it's simple, but after 25 years (he's pretty sure) of nothing but potatoes it sounds like ambrosia. "That sounds amazing! Vόστιμος!"

Him checks his pockets, and inspects the money the pretty man in red had reluctantly allowed him to take with him from the casino. "I'd love the chicken and rice, how much will I owe you for it?"

[shohaizono]

"Thousand yen," Sho answers, turning back into the truck to portion it out. He makes sure to include utensils and a napkin before turning around again to collect the money and hand over the food.

[stilldoingapplescience]

Thousand yen, thousand yen....Him digs the money from his pocket and stares at the numbers. He's usually fine, but once in a while his vision goes all screwy with text or numbers and it doesn't go away for hours. He wishes he'd been warned this was a possible side effect of his brain damage. "Oh god the dyscalculia is back...."

He stares at the money for a long moment, places it on the counter and squints at it. Thank God this didn't happen at the casino; he'd be broke if he had abruptly lost the ability to comprehend numbers back there. ".... I'm so sorry, my brain went funny again and I can't read numbers, how much of this is enough?"

[shohaizono]

An excited man in an orange jumpsuit with a circular logo stares at Sho's menu, "What's the best here? I haven't had any food other than potatoes in literal decades so I'm eager to get some real food..."

@stilldoingapplescience

Ah, a new customer. Maybe some sort of janitor?

"Well, the most popular menu item is the chicken over rice. Would you like to order that?"

[stilldoingapplescience]

Chicken over rice? Him knows it's simple, but after 25 years (he's pretty sure) of nothing but potatoes it sounds like ambrosia. "That sounds amazing! Vόστιμος!"

Him checks his pockets, and inspects the money the pretty man in red had reluctantly allowed him to take with him from the casino. "I'd love the chicken and rice, how much will I owe you for it?"