HOW TO FINGER A MAN’S ANUS
A SHORT GUIDE TO PROSTATE MASSAGE
The receiver should have a bowel movement beforehand, if necessary. In any case, both partners may prefer if he has a series of enemas shortly before, injecting only enough water to rinse out the rectum. He shouldn’t take too much water too deeply, as it might come out at an importune moment. Enemas, of course, eliminate trace of feces, but they also relax the anal muscles and stimulate the whole area. Wash with warm water and gentle soap afterwards.
Start with foreplay: engage in sexy talk, massage his buttocks, have him present himself in a way to expose his anus, give him analingus, spank him, circle the sphincter muscle with a finger, and so on. If you delay the moment of insertion and tease him physically and verbally, he’ll reach the point where he’ll want it so badly he’ll beg.
Use a lot of lubricant. Water-based lubricants, like KY Jelly, are generally better, as they doesn’t stain fabrics like silicone-based lubricants. But you have to keep applying, because they get sticky rather fast.
Enjoy the process of penetration. You shouldn’t race to the prostate any more than you would race to the clitoris. Treat the anus much like you would the vagina, only more gently and with even more patience. It feels wonderful having a lubricated finger plunging in and out, and can be fascinating for the person penetrating the other.
The prostate is located about two or three inches inside the anus toward the front of the body. Often one can feel it through the wall of the anus as a circular bulge.
Try circling the pad of a fingertip around the edge of prostate. If you touch it directly, do so gently, with about the same pressure you would apply rubbing your eyeball. You can use a repetitive tapping motion or slide your fingertip back and forth over the prostate. Experiment.
You can also apply steady pressure while the man squeezes his anal muscles around your finger. Doing this for a long time can produce semen without an orgasm. It’s referred to as prostate milking. It feels good having the prostate empty, and he can still go on to have an orgasm (though the ejaculation will have a much lower volume).
Try stroking the perineum (the external area of skin between his anus and his testicles) while your finger is inside his anus. This will simultaneously stimulate the prostate from a second angle.
Oral sex along with prostate massage can feel incredible. Suck his penis in rhythm with your finger in his anus.
Don’t forget his testicles! You can lick and gently suck on them too.
Maybe give the prostate a break and just finger his anus. That’s pleasurable in itself, and gives the prostate pleasure indirectly. He might prefer that, having your finger slide in and out.
He may like to have you insert two or more fingers at once. Start by twisting your index and middle fingers, which will make them enter more easily. Experiment with ways of gently stretching the anal sphincter (the outer “lips,” what people generally refer to as the anus). Once he is really open, you can start inserting a butt plug, dildo, vibrator, or prostate massager, if he so desires.
One nice trick is to insert a finger using an edible lubricant or a lot of saliva (go very slowly if you do that) and then lick his anus around your finger. This can make an exquisite surprise, having his anus fingered and licked at the same time.
The orgasms from prostate massage and anal fingering can be incredibly strong, especially for a first timer. Don’t be surprised if he makes a lot of noise while you finger him, and groans or cries out in joyful agony when he cums. He may ejaculate more semen than ever before.
Many men will prefer that their partner withdraw the finger during orgasm. Somehow it feels right, being able to concentrate on orgasm and ejaculation. The sensation of one’s anus being open, tender, and satisfied may also add a special pleasure.
Being so intimate, anal fingering and prostate massage can be a deeply emotional, even spiritual experience for a man. Keep that in mind, including in the aftermath of orgasm. He will likely feel vulnerable and in need of quiet affection and gentle words.
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