:)

18 year old sad girl from ireland. not very interesting or funny. don’t follow

[amateur]

[non-newtoniangenderfluid]

Fuck you I’ll reblog it cuz it’s an elephant strawberry I need no other reason

[kindlydoakirb-deactivated202106]

It’s an elephant strawberry. That’s already magical enough.

[sovdiet]

[fluoresensitivearchive-deactiva]

cats: *big sleep*

cats: *wake up, lil bath, lil food*

cats: oh man … i’m so sleepy *big sleep part 5*

[skoggybear]

[sandandglass]

[daveycameronisapie]

Is there anything more excruciating than not knowing if someone is “feel bad, need space”, “feel bad, need u to reach out” or “literally fine, just busy, stop pestering me”

[catchymemes]

[horse-on-a-porch]

I love how the dog is so delightfully cheerful while the horse is like “Mrs haversham killed me”

[lireekuh]

Your comment just made me cry laughing

[greenteaparadise]

*hears noises at night*: well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life

*gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I ever going to see my first born child

*heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is

*a cop walks by*: here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone

*taking a test*: don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school and amount to nothing

*gets a sunburn*: great now I have skin cancer how will I tell my parents

*tripping over something*: I guess my leg will have to be amputated why did this happen to me

*period is late*: shit i'm pregnant i'm the next virgin mary

[lesbianshepard]

if you work retail long enough i think you should be given license to kill 

[lesbianshepard]

new hire: you can tell the customers to go fuck themselves if they start acting mean

1 year: you are allowed to maim or seriously injure

3 years: you can kill a customer if they start a fight and you can prove they provoked you

5 years: you can kill customers on the clock in any scenario, no questions asked

10+ years: you can kill any customers in any stores 

[lesbianshepard]

addendum: during holiday season they give the entire staff a machete regardless of how long they’ve worked retail and whatever happens, happens

[barcoque]

[postirony-moved-deactivated2016]

you flirting: hey beautiful

me flirting:

[golfgalaxy]

my organs when i finally eat my first meal at 5pm

[undergroundcities-deactivated20]

When that meal is sour Gummi worms black coffee and Mac donalds

[mlnho-deactivated20180414]

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

hmmm

[hell-in-a-handbasket1]

@biffan

[picsthatmakeyougohmm]

hmmm

[lohanthony-deactivated20210629]

[kittyb4e]