thinking about the differences between michael and noah at this late night hour and how they're raised ultimately impacts the way they present themselves…
noah is raised in a house where toxic masculinity is perpetuated. his father is narrow minded and expects to have a son that enjoys sports, gaming, and shuns femininity. his mother similarly has views on how 'average boyhood' should be, even if noah's antics annoy her.
so as a result, noah spends his adolesence "hating" girly things and although he mellows in adulthood, he still acts like he's ABOVE acts of self-care on that "no pain, no gain" bullshit.
as a parent, pietro holds traditional standards that stem from the way he was raised, however he knows his father was problematic and thus he walks a tight line of wanting to uphold culture and wanting to be a modern parent. rosaria, meanwhile, holds "hippy sensibilities." she never taught carlo or michael things like color having a gender, she never lashed out at michael for kissing his sister's dolls, and she always let them express their feelings and encouraged them to communicate how they feel.
now being the youngest amongst antonella, angela, and [slightly older than] fiora meant that he was frequently exposed to media his sisters liked in the way carlo wasn't because this is how his sisters played and bonded with him! and even despite that, michael still enjoyed boyish movies and tv shows about action and bold, daring adventurers.
so, michael grows up, grows out his hair, has relatively colorful furniture [because rosie encouraged color] and doesn't think twice about wearing certain colors on his clothes. plus he feels women are inclined to feel like they can speak and be themselves around a man who doesn't come across as aggressive or cold. he deeply enjoys when zoe combs through his hair or styles it, viewing it as relaxing and as a form of affection through her touch.
in contrast, as an adult noah has to be forced to have a spa day or do skin care routines with angela. later in the aftermath, he thinks: 'wow, i do look better.' i think this mentality changes the longer he stays employed by angela. when their paths cross as adults, noah and michael don't shun each other for their preferences.
michael thinks noah needs to loosen up a little while noah knows that michael isn't weak. he can actually be scrappy, he is Sal's nephew after all.